May  i,  1893.] 
THE  TROPICAL  AGRICULTURIST. 
Or  bold-fac’d  footman,  tardily  obey’d, 
Calls  Lords,  and  Knights,  and  Squires  and  Priests  and 
From  white  and  red,  to  coffee,  tea,  and  cards.  [Bards, 
When  the  rude  North  comes  roaring  up  the  vale, 
To  silence  sinks  the  lily-bending  gale  : 
So  sinks  the  converse  of  the  soft-robed  clan 
At  the  hard  step  of  heavy-tramping  man. 
Lost  is  the  tale,  adjourn'd  the  cutting  jest, 
The  secret  kept,  the  sly  charade  unguessed. 
With  many  a smother’d  laugh,  and  many  a flush, 
The  buzzing  watch-word  passes — hush — hush — hush — 
’Tis  but  the  Parson— perhaps  it  is  but  I — 
Then  wherefore,  Ladies,  all  this  mystery  ? 
The  Parson,  sure,  cannot  excite  your  fears, 
And  I,  you  know,  have  neither  eyes  nor  ears, — 
Then  let  the  tale,  the  jest,  the  laugh  revive, 
As  if  there  were  not  such  a quiz  alive. 
Oh  1 let  me  hear  your  sweetness  ; and  I’m  stunn’d 
With  thine,  Ricardo,  and  the  Sinking  Fund. 
As  when  victorious  troops  ho  pillage  bound, 
In  scatter’d  bands,  obey’d  the  bugle’s  sound, 
So  one  by  one,  the  jovial  swains  repair 
To  the  soft  standard  of  the  muster’d  fair. 
First,  the  prim  Dangler,  complaisant  and  sleek, 
With  frill  that  flutters,  and  with  shoes  that  creek, 
Tells  all  the  news  to  every  aged  she, 
And  points  each  slander  with  a low  congee  ; 
Pays  for  each  morsel  that  the  Lady  gives 
With  parasitical  superlatives : 
Whate’er  he  tastes— ’tis  excellent— divine — 
Above  the  coffee— as  below  the  wine. 
Next  comes  a thing,  I know  not  how  to  name, 
Of  doubtful  sex,  which  neither  sex  will  claim — 
So  rank  with  Bergamot  and  Attargul, 
That  every  nose  will  wind  him  for  a fool — 
A thing  so  fine,  so  exquisitely  nice, 
It  has  no  godt  for  virtue,— no,  nor  vice. 
Its  waspish  waist,  elaborately  thin, 
Its  heartless  leer,  and  apathetic  grin, — 
That  arching  eyebrow  of  inane  pretence, 
That  eye  of  unimpassion’d  impudence — 
Are  these  permitted  at  a lady’s  side  ? 
Forbid  it,  Modesty,  and  Maiden  pride. 
Shall  he  your  soft  embosom'd  thoughts  engage, 
That  joins  the  negatives  of  youtii  and  age  i 
Boyish  in  brain,  in  heart  as  well  as  cold 
As  a French  Lourtier  fifty  winters  old, 
Yet  oft  the  feeling  heart,  the  thinking  brain, 
Attempt  to  ape  him,  but  attempt  in  vain  : 
For  let  kind  Nature  do  the  best  she  can, 
’Tis  woman  still  that  makes  or  mars  the  Man. 
And  so  it  is — the  creature  can  beguile 
The  fairest  faces  of  the  readiest  smile. 
The  next  that  comes  the  Hyson  to  inhale 
If  not  a Man,  at  least  we  own  a Male 
His  worst  offences  are  against  your  ears 
For,  though  he  laughs  too  loud,  he  seldom  sneers. 
He  knows  the  Coachman’s  craft,  the  Hunter’s  hollo 
The  Fancy  phrase,  that  might  confound  Apollo.  ’ 
Right  well  he  loves,  in  How,  or  Lark,  or  Spree 
To  “ sound  the  base  string  of  humanity.” 
His  rural  friends  are  Nimrod’s  genuine  seed 
The  btst  among  them  are  his  Hog  and  Steed. 
His  town  acquaintance,  form’d  on  midnight  bulks 
Adorn  the  Nabbing  Cheat,  or  man  the  Hulks.  ’ 
With  iron  grasp— with  face  and  voice  of  Brass 
He  shouts  loud  greeting  to  each  bonny  lass—  ’ 
Then  bolts  his  tea— and  straight  begins  a story 
Of  Hunters’  perils,  or  of  Bruisers’  glory.  y 
Talks  in  an  unknown  tongue  of  Max  and  Millina 
And  doubtless  fancies  he  is  mighty  killing. 
Now,  up  the  stairs,  disputiug  ail  the  way, 
Two  keen  logicians  urge  their  wordy  fray  ; 
Abrupt  they  enter,  voluble  and  loud, 
But  soon  remember  that  ihey  have  not  bowed  • 
That  error  mended  both  at  once  relate  ’ 
To  some  fair  maid  the  subject  of  debate  : 
To  her  kind  judgment  both  at  once  refer— 
For  eaoh  expects  a julgorent  kind  from  her. 
But  she  too  meek,  too  witty,  and  too  wise 
To  judge  between  the  vassals  of  her  eyes,’ 
To  eaoh  Polemic  eeemiDg  to  incline 
Allots  to  eaoh  the  happy  chance— to  shine 
Through  four  lull  cups  their  nioe  di^ipotfoas  $un, 
703 
And  all  suppose  them  just  where  they  begun  : 
Till  a gruff  senior  on  1 biB  copper  nose, 
Arrive  to  part  the  Dialectic  Foes. 
“YouDg  men,”  says  he,  “ he  sure  you  both  are  wroug 
And  all  your  Theories  are  not  worth  a song  : 
Tbe  point  is  one  that  elder  heads  has  puzzled  : 
Presumptuous  boys  like  you  should  all  be  muzzled.” 
And  to  the  Maid  he  turns  his  pohmn  face, 
And  gravely  tells  her  he  has  judg’d  tho  ease. 
But  now  the  ling’ring  votaries  of  port 
Make  to  the  fair — their  loDg-delay’d  resort. 
What  bulky  forms  around  the  table  pre<s  ! 
D.  D.  and  D L.  1.  Bnd  A.  S.  S. 
Tbe  China  rings,  tbe  urn  is  nigh  o’ereef. 
By  such  a Bacchanalian  Alphabet. 
With  glowing  faces  and  with  watery  eyes, 
They  pass  about  their  pnrey  galiantries. 
What  beauties  they  in  every  dame  behold — 
Inspired  adorers  of  the  plain  and  o'.d : 
If  men  were  still  so  happy  and  so  blind, 
Could  mtn  or  women  call  their  fate  unkind  ? 
They  not  remark  the  glance— the  laugh  suppreet, — 
la  the  pert  virgin’s  newly-budded  breast  ; 
Nor  see  their  wivtB’  contracted  brow  severe, 
Their  daughter’s  blush,  that  moves  the  Daudy’e  snetr 
Nay,  scarce  young  Nimrod’s  merry  roar  can  betr, 
Hark,  like  the  rumble  of  a coming  storm, 
Without  we  hear  the  dreadful  word,  Reform- 
Last  of  tbe  rout,  and  dogg’d  with  public  cares, 
The  politician  stumbles  up  the  stairs  : 
Whose  dusky  soul  net  beauty  can  illume, 
Nor  wine  dispel  his  patriotic  gloom. 
From  guest  to  guest  in  turbid  ire  ho  goes, 
And  ranks  us  all  among  our  country’s  foes. 
Says  ’tis  a shame  that  we  should  take  our  tea, 
Till  wrongs  are  righted,  and  the  notion  free  ; 
That  priests  and  poets  are  a venal  race, 
Who  preach  for  patronage,  and  rhyme  for  place  ; 
That  boys  ond  girls  are  crazy  to  be  oooing, 
When  England's  hope  is  bankruptcy  and  ruin 
That  wiser  ’twere  the  coming  wratn  to  fly, 
And  that  old  women  should  make  haste  to  die. 
As  froward  infants  cry  Ihetnselves  to  sleep, 
If  unregarded  they  are  left  to  weep, 
So  patriot  zeal,  if  unopposed,  destroys, 
Its  strength  with  fervour,  and  its  breath  with  none, 
Allow’d  resistless  as  the  Son  of  Ammon, 
Behold  the  great  Reformer  at  Backgammon  : 
Debt,  taxes,  boroughs,  and  decline  of  price, 
Forgotten  al 1 , he  only  damns  the  dice, 
But  pause, — the  urn  that  Bwettly  sung  before, 
Like  a crack’d  lute,  is  vocal  now  no  more  ; 
Dry  as  the  footsteps  of  the  ebbiDg  sea, 
Effete  and  flaocid  lie  the  leaves  of  toa. 
And  I,  who  always  keep  the  golden  mean, 
Have  yust  declined  a seventh  cup  of  green. 
The  noise,  the  tumult  of  that  hour  is  flown  ; 
Lost  in  quadrille,  whist,  commerce,  or  Pope  Joan, 
With  eager  haste  my  theme  is  clear’d  away 
And  Tea  concluded,  shall  conclude  my  lay. 
— Blackioood's  Edinburgh  Magazine , Vol.  XXVII-,  1830, 
p.  503. 
~ <$■ 
DRUGS,  ETC.  IN  LONDON. 
(From  the  Chemist  and  Druggist.) 
London,  March  15. 
Cinchona.— The  value  of  the  cinchona  exporta  from 
the  U.  S.  of  Colombia  has  receded  from  A!l3,9i9  in 
1888  to  £4,(5iO  iu  1889,  L'ibB  in  1890,  and  £22o  in  1 8U 1 . 
Kssential  Oils.— Lemougrass  oh  keeps  steady  at  the 
recent  advance  to  id  per  0 z.  for  native  brands.  Sales 
have  been  made  privately  at  that  figure.  Citronella  is 
held  at  Jd  per  oz.  lor  lair  quality  on  tue  spot. 
Quinine.— Lower,  un  Friday  last  5,U(Jj  oz.  Brunswick 
quinine  on  the  spot,  in  seconu-hand,  sold  at  8Jd  per  oz. 
At  is  pointed  out  by  a iSew  York  house  that  the  imports 
of  quinine  (as  sulphate  and  iu  the  baric;  into  the  United 
States  in  1892  amount  to  at  least  4,5uu,bou  oz.  or  halt 
the  estimated  output  of  all  the  factories  in  the  world. 
As  it  is  said  to  be  “ a weil-kuowu  fact’’  that  stoons 
iu  tho  States  are  lighter  than  usual,  it  is  argued  that 
the  consumption  ot  quinine  iu  America  must  be  ou 
the  increase ; also  that,  generally,  ah  over  tbe  world 
the  consumption  is  ahead  of  the  production,  and  that 
