1803.] 
AMERICAN AGRICULTURIST. 
*77 
A Miser l&cftmkcd. 
It is related of Lord Braco, a Scotch Judge of the last 
century, and an intense miser, that on one occasion one 
of his farmers saw him pick up a farthing, and said to 
him: "I would give a shilling Lord Braco, to have a 
sight of all your silver and gold.*' "Well, man," said 
his lordship, "it shall cost you no more." The shilling 
was paid, and the judge exhibited to the farmer a con- 
siderable number of iron boxes filled with gold and silver 
money. " Now my lord," said the man, " I am as rich as 
you are." " How is that " asked his lordship. " Because 
I see the money, and you have not the heart to do any- 
thing else with it," was the sharp reply. 
What a, Word May »©. 
The chaplain of a Western regiment relates, that while 
visiting a family in Illinois, the mother, an elderly lady, 
told him the following circumstance: Many years before, 
her son of about four years old, was one day playing in 
the road, when he fell and hurt himself slightly, and 
commenced crying very loudly. Just then a tall young 
man came around the corner, driving a yoke of oxen, and 
picking up the boy, he said, "You'll never make a sol- 
dier my little man, if you cry for a tumble." The child 
instantly brightened up, and from that time seemed to 
. strive to be more manly. " There, said the mother is 
the same boy, pointing to a fine looking cavalry Captain 
in the yard, " and that tall young man who spoke to him 
is now Commander-in-Chief of the army and navy, 
viz. : Abraham Lincoln, President of the United States." 
A Key to a Person's Name. 
One of the Agriculturist boys in Fulton County, Ind., 
sends the accompanying table of letters, 
by which the name of a person or any A B D H P 
word may be found out in the following C C E I Q 
manner: Let the person whose name you E F F J R 
wish to know, inform you in which of the G G G K S 
upright columns the first letter of his name I J L L T 
is contained. If it be found in but one col- K K M M U 
umn, it is the top letter: if it occurs in M N N N V 
more than one column, it is found by ad- O O O W 
ding the alphabetical, numbers of the top Q R T X X 
letters of these columns, and the sum will S S V Z Y 
be the number of the letter sought. By U V V Y Z 
taking one letter at a time in this way, the WWW 
whole name can be ascertained. For ex- Y Z 
ample, take the word Jane. J is found in the two col- 
umns commencing with B and H : which are the 2d and 
Sih letters down the alphabet ; their sum is 10, and the 10th 
letter down the alphabet is J, the letter sought. The next 
letter A appears -in but one column, where it stands at the 
top. N is seen in the columns headed with B, D and H ; — 
these are the 2d, 4th, and 6th letters of the alphabet ; which 
added give the 14th or N; and so on. The use of this table 
will excite no little curiosity among those unacquaint- 
ed with the foregoing explanation. 
New and Useful Premium for Boys and 
Girls— and Others. 
A subscriber in Missouri (an officer in the army, we 
believe) wrote some time ago : " If possible, add a case 
of Drawing or Drafting instruments to your general 
Premium List. Nothing could be more useful to the 
young, and to the old also — farmers and others — than a 
case of instruments for drawing plans, plotting out fields, 
buildings, etc., etc." — Well, we have engaged an Import- 
ing house to furnish a supply of such instruments for our 
Premium List, and the first instalment is on hand. They 
are in neat cases, four by eight inches, each containing a 
dozen very excellent articles — dividers, points, pencil- 
holders, ruling-pens, semi-circles, etc., made of polished 
steel and brass. The dividers are furnished with exten- 
sion joints and adjustable pieces for making all varieties 
of circles, angles, etc. Each piece is fitted into the vel- 
vet cushion. The price ($6) includes postage, and they 
will be forwarded post-paid to any place in the United 
States and Territories. This premium (as in the table in 
next column) is given for 24 subscribers at $1 each, or 
50 at 80 cents each. It is a first-rate thing. 
An Amusing Reply.— The little sister of a friend of 
ours asked the meaning of the word biped, and was told 
it signified having two legs. A quadruped has four legs, 
continued her brother, " and now," asked he, "what would 
you call any thing with three legs." In a moment she 
replied, " I should say it was a biped and a half." 
A Comical Mistake. — At an exhibition of a magic 
lantern the children were asked to name the pictures as 
they were shown. A view of the children of Israel 
crossing the Red Sea was brought out. " What is this,' 
was asked. A Utile fellow in the audience enthusiastic- 
ally called out ' is Burnside crossing the.Rappahamiock. !' 
*w H 
|a 4fca 
DOING GOOD, AKD GETTING PAY FOR IT. 
While many Journals are adopting our long-time mode of 
doing business, some cotemporaries decry our practice of 
giving premiums. As a cloak to their want of enterprise, 
they intimate that certain other periodicals are not good 
enough in themselves, but need a " make-weight," or pre- 
mium, thrown in. "We Invite a comparison in quality, 
amount of reading matter, engravings, and in price. All 
these journals proclaim the importance of getting farmers 
and others to read more about their business, and constantly 
urge their readers to solicit new subscribers, and to do it 
'for the good of the cause." That is all very well; every 
one is doing; a good work who induces a neighbor to read 
and think more— to make his head help his hands. 
But we go a little further, and offer some pay to those who 
devote time and effort to this work. The easiest and best 
way to do so, is to offer specific Premiums of good articles, 
for a definite number of names. Owing to the special good- 
will of manufacturers, publishers, etc., and to some adver- 
tising arrangements, we are able to offer much larger pre- 
miums in this way than in cash. There is no "catch" in our 
mode— no fine premium to the one sending in the largest list 
of names, leaving all others " out in the cold," though they 
may have worked just as hard, and obtained almost as many 
subscribers. The canvasser knows just what he or she is 
working for, and that the pay or absence of it, does not de- 
pend upon what some other unknown party is doing. 
"We do not pretend to give an article costing $2, and throw 
In the paper for a year, all for $1. We offer no article of in- 
ferior quality or value. The premiums are all useful and 
desirable, and cheap at the prices named. Every article 
offered, is a good one— nothing second-hand, or of poor make 
or quality, or kind. We intend in all cases to deal fairly 
with every one. We invite all to make au effort to get one or 
more of the preniiumns described below, and thus do good 
to others in circulating the paper, and get paid for the 
work ; many have already done so during the past month. 
1.5 
Table of Premiums for 1864. 
Open to all— No Competition. 
Names of Premium Articles. 
Good Books— See terms below * 
A — American Cyclopedia (Appleton'a Ncw).$^6 00 
B— Best Family Clothes Wringer $7 00 
C— Nonpareil Washing Machine. ..$16 00 
D— Sewing Machine, (AV heeler & Wilson)... $45 00 
E— Sewing Machine, (Wilcox & Gibbs) $40 00 
F— Woodruff's Mercurial Barometer , $S 00 
G— Woodruff's Mercurial Barometer $12 00 
H— The Aquarius - .... $10 00 
I— Five Octave Melodeon (best) $80 00 
J— Four Octave Melodeon (best) $f>5 00 
$1 24 
$1 SO 
K— Seven back Volumes Agricultruist,"] $8 08 
L— Six do do do «■-• ® 7 ^ 
M— Five do do do "ag $0 20 
N— Four do do do §,* $4 96 
O— Three do do do f&§ $3 72 
P— Two do do do 
Q— One do do do 
K— Jacob's Portfolio Paper File „ 
S— Osborn & HodgUinson's Paints-. $1 50 
T— Premium Cylinder Plow.- $10 00 
U— Eagle Plow No. 20 $9 25 
V— Hay and Straw Cutter (best) $9 00 
W— Steel-tooth Cultivator (best) $7 50 
X— Family Lard and Wine Press $7 00 
aa— Case of Drawing Instruments $G 00 
No charge is made for packing or boxing any of the ar- 
ticles in this Premium List. The books and the Premi- 
ums K,to S, inclusive, are delivered to any part of the 
United Slates and Territories, free of all charges. The 
other articles cost the recipient only the freight after 
leaving the manufactory of each. XKSTEvery article 
is new and of the very best make. 
The names (with money for each,) can be sent in as fast 
as gathered, so that the subscribers can begin to receive 
their papers. The premium will be paid to any one as 
soon as his list is completed. But, let it be distinctly 
noted, we can reckon for premiums only those names 
which are marked as for Premiums, when they are sent in. 
All the separate names thus sent and marked as for pre- 
miums, are at once recorded, so that vve can immediately 
turn to any canvasser's list, and see how it stands. 
Premium clubs need not necessarily be all at one Post- 
Office. Each list ought to contain a fair proportion of 
new names, for it is to bring the paper before new sub- 
scribers, that the premiums are in part intended. 
To avoid confusion, please send in the exact amount 
wilh each list of names. In special cases, the whole sum 
for a premium list maybe forwarded, and the premium 
be received at once— the names to be sent in afterward. 
E^AIl names sent in now, get the great Strawberry 
plants. Note that 5 cents extra are needed if the" A gri' 
culturist Strawberry" plants are lo go by mail. This 
will, of course, be paid by the subscribers themselves. 
Descriptive Notes on the Premiums. 
* Books.— Any person sending 20 or more subscribers, 
may select from our Book List (page 362) to the amount 
of 10 cenls for each name sent in at the club price of SO 
cents, or to the amount of 30 cents for each name at $1. 
(No books sent for less than 20 names). The premium 
books will be delivered anywhere in the United States, 
or to the border of the British Provinces, free of all 
cost, by mail or express. Many Farmers' Clubs have, 
by means of this premium, obtained a *good Library, 
A— Appleton's New American Cyclopedia.— 
This magnificent work is now completed, and ready for im- 
mediate delivery. It consists of 16 heavy volumes, averaging 
800 large two column pages, or in the whole work, 13,804 
pages ! (The books fill up over a yard of shelf-room.) It is 
in reality a complete library of itself, embracing full infor- 
mation upon every topic of human knowledge, alphabeti- 
cally arranged for convenient reference. The subjects dis- 
cussed number over twenty-Jive thousand/ Itis hardly pos- 
sible to name anything upon which pretty full information 
may not be readily found In the Cyclopedia. Many who can 
not purchase the work may be able to obtain it through our 
Premium offer. It is worth a year's effort in raising subscri- 
bers, though many may get 1C0 names in a brief time. 
B— Best Clothes-Wringers.— This is a most excel- 
lent Household Implement, which should be in every family. 
It can be set upon any form of tub, and by turning with the 
right hand and picking up the garments with the left, they 
are pressed rapidly and easily between two elastic rollers, 
and drop out into a basket, quite as free from water as they 
can be wrung by the hardest twisting by baud. Every lady 
knows that hand wringing is really harder upon the arms 
and shoulders than eveu the washing; while the twisting 
stretches the filters with lever power, and hastens the wear- 
ing out. All this is avoided by the Wringer, which is in 
truth a strength-saver, and a clothes-saver. We have had 
one in use for nearly four years ; it is as good as ever, and 
has paid for itself many times over. A child can with this 
readily wring out a tub-full of clothes. Our Premium Wring- 
ers are of the family size, and of the best manufacture, and 
are provided with cogs, and with springs, so that they "will 
wring equally well any article from a blanket to a baby's 
stocking. The Wringer weighs only 15 lbs., and can be car- 
ried by hand, or sent by express, or freight to any point, and 
is ready for instant use on removing the light packing box. 
C— Nonpareil Washing Machine.— The best 
recommendation we can give of this, is, that while we have 
tried fifteen or twenty kinds, this is the only one that our 
" help" continue to use without being required to do so. It 
acts somewhat like the old " fulling mill ;" the clothes are 
put into the hot water, and beat by two pounders which con- 
stantly turn them over. The beaters are moved alternately 
by a crank, provided with balance wheel which adjusts the 
force required so as to make the turning easy. Take it all 
in all, the Nonpareil is the best Washing Machine we have 
found. If we could find a better one, we should put it in our 
list, for anything that helps to reduce the hard work of 
washing day, is a godsend. The machine can co as freight, 
or by express, to any part of the country, and we believe 
will give better satisfaction than any other yet brought out. 
D— E— Sewing Machines.— We need not enlargu 
upon the benefits of Sewing Machines. It is no exaggeration 
to say that a woman can in a day do ten limes as much 
ordinary sewing with a machine, as she can do by hand. 
The interest on a $50 Machine is only $3 to $4 a year, which 
is a small consideration compared to its advantages. Five 
hundred families ought to be supplied through our pre- 
mium list this year. At least 80 to 100 copies of the Agri- 
culturist ought to be taken in every town, and would be if 
some enterprising man or woman would go round and gath- 
er them. Two or three ladies might join their efforts, and 
get a machine for use between them. We offer two kinds of 
Machines, both varieties of which we have had in use for 
several years, and with great satisfaction. They are both 
supplied with the Hemmer, and are sent out with full in- 
structions for use. The 'Wheeler «& "Wilson Ma- 
chine, we have used during five years, and can bear full 
testimony in its favor. More of these machines are sold and 
used, we believe, than of all the other good kinds together, 
which is a strong proof of the satisfaction they give. This 
sews with a double thread, both sides of the fabric showing 
the same stitch. The Wilcox & Gihhs Machine, 
we have used for over three years, and for most kinds of 
sewing it is excellent. It is very simple in its operation and 
can be worked by those who have the smallest amount of 
mechanical skill. It can be used for most kinds of sewing, 
and may well be adopted generally, at least where the higher 
priced machines can not be afforded.— For every kind of 
sewing, especially where the same stitch is required on 
both sides, we prefer the Wheeler & Wilson. 
F—G— "Woodruff's Mercurial Barometer. —This 
is conceded to be the best and cheapest instrument for gen- 
eral use, which Is now offered to the public. The peculiar 
form of mercury cup invented by Mr. Woodruff", renders the 
instrument far more portable than any thing previously made. 
The safe delivery of every instrument given by us as a pre- 
mium, is warranted by the manufacturer (Charles Wilder, 
Peterboro, N. H.), when to be sent within 1,500 miles. The 
Instruments are beautifully made, are about 3 feet lonif, and 
are sent direct from the factory, with no expense save the 
express charges. We offer two forms which differ mainly in 
the style of case, both being supplied with Thermometer and 
Yemier. The $13 form is of course more ornamental, and 
the more desirable instrument, though either of them is high- 
ly valuable. A barometer is to farmers or others on land 
what it is to sailors at sea— an indicator of the weather 
to be looked for. There are many times every year when 
the indications of the barometer in regard to the weather, 
will often be of more value than its whole price, while the 
interest on its cost would, bo less than half a dollar a year 
