i88i.] 
Chemical Shams. 
283 
miles from the Albert Memorial where serf-chemists and 
serf-scientists in general are hatched in numbers, and sent 
out over the United Kingdom. 
The serf-chemist contributes largely to the general 
amusement of youth. His display of fireworks and gaudy 
show of apparatus on the ledbure-table do not fail to fasci- 
nate the juvenile eye. The roar of his hydrogen and oxygen 
cannon, as well as the roll of his matter-of-fadt voice, with 
his general suave demeanour, have a powerful effedt on both 
youthful and adult audiences, who look upon him as a pro- 
digy of learning. A curious fadb happened at one of those 
popular science ledtures. The orator, in that polysyllabic 
dialedt which mystifies the generality of his hearers, was 
illustrating the mode of producing hydrogen, as well as 
putting forth in learned garb the chemical theory of its 
liberation from sulphuric acid and zinc : he took the gene- 
rator most gracefully in his left hand, and introduced with 
an ornamental sweep of the right a few pieces of the zinc, 
afterwards adding a more than sufficient amount of sulphuric 
acid at the highest specific gravity. Our ledturer then, with 
an air of confidence, corked the flask ; the cork of course was 
perforated, and a piece of glass tube, drawn to a fine point, 
inserted. The apparatus was shaken vigorously, but no 
appearance of hydrogen ! A look of mixed anxiety and 
chagrin passed over the pseudo’s face, when a stentorian 
voice from the audience exclaimed “ Stick in yer water, 
mon.” Vulgar though the voice, its owner evidently knew 
more than the ledturer. Our serf had by this time reco- 
vered himself, and quietly said “ I beg pardon, gentlemen ; 
I had the full intention of introducing the water at first, but 
a new idea struck me, and I wished to verify it ! ” The 
next and most telling part of the ledture was the attempted 
illustration of the musical sounds caused by hydrogen. Our 
ledturer, having secured a length of combustion tubing, ap- 
plied a taper to the hydrogen jet; but the result was a 
general explosion, the air not being completely expelled from 
the generator, and the acid was sprayed most effedtually 
over the ledturer’s coat, which in a short time showed that 
beautiful colour so often produced by sulphuric acid, and 
admired so much by pseudo-chemists in general. 
It is humiliating to the scientific world, if we consider 
the amount of money annually spent in keeping up an Insti- 
tution professedly to furnish the United Kingdom with pro- 
perly qualified men, to find it sending forth a class of 
superficial who — after the magical passing of an examina- 
tion — parade before us as certified science teachers and 
