A DIRTY « BOY 
all owing to his going to give out the sheets and 
blankets to wash to-morrow. We tell him to rise 
up from committing perjury, and as there are no 
clean sheets to get that spare blanket out of the 
almirah and make up a bed on the couch. The next 
morning our bed passes under a searching examination, 
and the result is, that it is our belief no washerman 
can ever possibly clean those sheets, blankets and 
pillovv^-cases, they are so dirty, and so thoroughly 
impregnated with oil and filth. The boy is asked 
when he went to bed the night before, and he replies 
at 10 o’clock. Now we have caught him, we say ; 
we arrived shortly after midnight, and is it possible 
that the bedding could have got into this filthy state 
all in two hours. But you| will never put out or 
shut up a boy. He quickly responded, it must 
be, because he was very, unusually dirty, not having- 
bathed or washed, as he intended that very morning to 
commence and throughly clean all the bungalow. “And 
no more than need,” say we, “ for such a dirty house 
I never saw.” “Where ignorance is bliss’t is folly 
to be wise. ” After this exploit, we always avoided 
after an absence, coming unexpectedly home. It 
answers no good purpose, quite the reverse ; we all 
know the lax and careless condition of servants in 
general, when master is away then, why should the 
master be put to inconvenience and discomfort on 
this account, when he can have everything comfort- 
able, clean, and in the usual way, by telling w^hen 
he is to be back, or if we could not always do this* 
w^e generally sent on the box cooly, or horsekeeper 
ill advance to say master Avas coming. The result 
was, we were expected, and stepped into a clean 
home. We even preserved such a lively recollection 
of the last midnight adventure, in being locked out 
of our bungalow, that, on any subsequent midnight 
arrivals, we all always announced our arrival in 
very plain terms, which would admit of no manner 
of doubt, and of course never saw any further 
repetitions of wdiat has been described. But sometimes 
even these plain announcements would meet with no 
response. The boy had gone down to spend the 
night at the lines, and had locked up the house 
and taken away the key. There was always some 
trouble and inconvenience. So we took all the keys, 
and locked them up, stating that now it w^as im- 
possible to lock the bungalow, and that, if it was 
locked up, it must be by the inside bolts, which 
course said as plain as could be that that some one 
was inside, and therefore, by knocking, admission 
would be obtained. This did not suit the boy’s 
