AMEBIC AN AGEICULTUEIST 
155 
Elephant on Board. —When the Elephant 
went up the lake on the steamer Lady Elgin, 
a few days since, we remarked that the huge 
traveler might be a somewhat ugly customer on 
board a boat. It appears that on the passage 
the wheelsman suddenly found difficulty in 
changing the boat’s course. For, tug and pull, 
and bear on as much as he would, the wheel 
would not budge an inch. 
“ Port helm 1” cried the Captain. 
“Aye, aye, sir,” responded the .wheelsman. 
But still the helm was “ hard a starboard,” 
and the boat was'taking a turn into the middle 
of the lake. The Captain swore, and the mate 
made for the wheel-house. Pushing the man 
aside, he took hold himself. It was of no use^- 
the mate was no more successful than the wheels¬ 
man. 
“ Port helm ! for heaven’s sake ! Can’t you 
see where the boat is going?” shouted out the 
Captain. 
The mate declared that something was the 
matter with the wheel, as he could not stir it. 
The thing was perfectly inexplicable. The 
engine was stopped, and master, mate and all 
hands went below to see what could be the 
matter. After a search of some minutes, it was 
discovered that Mr. Siam, the “ Elephant” of the 
Menagerie, not liking the noisy rattling of chains 
overhead, had taken upon himself the responsi¬ 
bility of giving a new “turn” to affairs. With 
his trunk wound around the chain he was hold¬ 
ing on with the grasp of a vice, and it was with 
some difficulty that the keeper persuaded him 
that such liberties could not be allowed. It is 
said that he behaved quite well during the rest 
of the voyage.— BuJ. Com. Adv. 
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Woman. —The following charming passage is 
from “Rural Hours,” by Miss Cooper, daughter 
of the late Fennimore Cooper. It so beauti¬ 
fully expresses the sentiments of all women of 
pure feeling and correct principles, that it should 
be widely circulated: 
“We American women certainly owe a debt 
of gratitude to our countrymen for their kind¬ 
ness and consideration of us generally. Gal¬ 
lantry may not always take a graceful form in 
this part of the world, and mere flattery may be 
worth as little here as elsewhere; but there is a 
glow of generous feeling toward women in the 
hearts of most American men, which is highly 
honorable to them as a nation and as individuals. 
In no country is the protection given to wo¬ 
man’s helplessness more full and free—in no 
country is the assistance she receives from the 
stronger arm so general—and nowhere does 
her weakness meet with more forbearance and 
consideration. Under such circumstances, it 
must be woman’s own fault if she be not thor¬ 
oughly respected also. The position accorded 
to her is favorable; it remains for her to fill in a 
manner worthy her own sex, gratefully, kindly, 
and simply ; with truth and modesty of heart 
and life; unwavering fidelity of feeling and 
principle, with patience, cheerfulness and sweet¬ 
ness of temper—no unfit return to those who 
smooth the daily path for her.” 
Sickness. —In sickness the soul begins to 
dress herself for immortality. First she unties 
the string of vanity that made her upper gar¬ 
ment cleave to the world, and sit uneasy. She 
puts off the light and fantastic robe of lust and 
wanton appetite. Next to this, the soul by the 
help of sickness, knocks off the fetters of pride 
ancl vainer complacencies. Then she draws 
the curtains, and stops the light from coming 
in, and takes the picture down, those fantastic 
images of self love, and gay remembrances of 
vain opinion and popular noises. Then the 
spirit stoops into sobrieties of humble thoughts 
and feels corruption chiding the forwardness of 
fancy, allaying the vapor of conceit and factious 
opinions. Next to these as the soul is still un¬ 
dressing, she takes off the roughness of her 
great and little angers and animosities, and re¬ 
ceives the oil of mercies and smooth forgiveness, 
fair interpretations and gentle answers, designs 
of reconciliation and Christian atonement in 
their places.— Jeremy Taylor. 
-♦ G e- 
Pkices Thirty-seven Years Ago. —Looking 
over our file for 1817, ive cast our eyes upon the 
prices current of February of that year; and 
as an evidence that the present prices of many 
leading articles have not come up to that time, 
we give a few samples. The prices given, it 
must be recollected, are the wholesale; the re¬ 
tail were of course higher. 
Bacon, 15 cents; barley, $1 25 to $1 50; 
beans, $4 to $4 50 per bushel; butter, shipping, 
No. 1, 24 cents, No. 2, 22 cents ; corn, $1 90 to 
$2 10; coffee, 19 to 21 cents. 
Virginia coal, from $9 to $15; flour, $14 to 
$15; hay $21 to $24; molasses,48 to 54 cents; 
peas, $2 50 to $3; rice, 7 cents; rye, $1 75 to 
$3 ; sugar, loaf, 23 to 25 cents ; brown, 11 to 15 
cents; teas, hyson, $1 70, hyson skin, $1, souc¬ 
hong, 68 to 75 cents.— Portsmouth Journal. 
->«<- 
The Home of Taste. —How easy it is to be 
neat!—to be clean ! How easy it is to arrange 
the rooms with the most graceful propriety! 
How easy it is to invest our houses with the 
truest elegance! Elegance resides not with the 
upholsterer or the draper; it is not put up with 
the hangings and curtains; it is not in the mo¬ 
saics, the carpeting, the rosewood, the maho¬ 
gany, the candelabras, or the marble ornaments ; 
it exists in the spirit presiding over the cham¬ 
bers of the dwelling. Contentment must always 
be most graceful; it sheds serenity over the 
scene of abode; it transforms a waste into a 
garden. The home lightened by these intima¬ 
tions of a nobler and brighter life, may be 
wanting in much which the discontented desire, 
but to its inhabitants it will be a place, far out¬ 
vying the oriental in brilliancy and glory. 
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Suckers don’t Bite. —A witty clergyman 
had been lecturing one evening in a country 
village, on the subject of temperance, and as 
usual after the lecture,, the pledge was passed 
around for signatures. 
“ Pass it along that way,” said the lecturer, 
pointing towards a gang of bloated and red 
nosed loafers near the door. “ Pass it along 
—perhaps some of those gentlemen would like 
to join our cause.” 
“ We don't bite at a bare hook,” gruffly mut¬ 
tered one of the rummies. 
“ Well,” replied the ready clergyman, “ I be¬ 
lieve there is a kind of fish call suckers, that do 
not bite.” 
-- 
A Good Reply. —A Sabbath-scliool teacher 
instructing his class on that portion of the 
Lord’s Prayer, “ Thy will be done on earth as 
it is in heaven,” said to them, “you have told 
me, my dear children, w r hat is to be done, the 
will of God; and where it is to be done, on 
earth, and how it is to be done—as it is done in 
heaven. How do you think the angels and the 
happy spirits do the will of God in heaven, as 
they a e to be our pattern?” The first child re¬ 
plied, “ They do it immediately ;” the second, 
“ They do it diligently;” the third, “ They do it 
always;” the fourth, “They do it with all their 
hearts;” the fifth, “They do it altogether.”— 
Here a pause ensued, and no child appeared to 
have an answer; but after some time, a little 
girl arose, and said, “ Why, sir, they do it with¬ 
out ashing any questions .” 
Plenty of Fish. —A French gentleman states 
that, at an expense of three or four thousand 
dollars, he could make the Susquehanna swarm 
from its source to its mouth with the best kinds 
of fish known in Europe or America. The 
time required would not bo more than two or 
three years. The process consists simply in 
pr jviding a few breeding places, where the des¬ 
truction of the spawn would be prevented, and 
the young be fed for a few weeks.— Exchange. 
Little Thorns. —The sweetest, the most 
clinging affection is often shaken by the slight¬ 
est breath of unkindness, as the delicate ten¬ 
drils of the vine are agitated by the faintest airs 
that blow in summer. An unkind word from 
one beloved often draws the blood from many a 
heart which would defy the battle-axe of hatred 
or the keenest edge of vindictive satire. Nay, 
the shade, the gloom of the face familiar and 
dear, awakens grief and pain. These are the 
little thorns which, though men of rougher 
form may make their way through them with¬ 
out feeling much, extremely incommode persons 
of a more refined turn in their journey through 
life, and make their traveling irksome and un¬ 
pleasant. 
- 1 o«- 
Wanted Polishing. — A lad from the “ Green 
Isle,” whose occupation was that of blacking 
stoves, fire places, and stove-pipes, bearing 
upon his arms a pot of blacking, with brushes 
and other implements of his trade, addressed a 
denizen of the city who was standing at his 
door: 
“ Has your honor any stoves to polish this 
morning? I’m the boy for that business.” 
The person addressed not being of a cour¬ 
teous manner, gruffly answered, 
“ Go about your business.” 
Pat moved a few steps off, to be out of the 
reach of a kick, and replied. 
“ Your honor would not be the worse of a 
little polishing yourself, I’m thinking.” 
Another Nebraska Bill.— The Portland 
Argus states that a democratic young gentleman 
of this city, having lately been presented by his 
handsome wife with an eight pound boy, had 
him forthwith named “ William Nebraska." 
To which the Boston Times adds: “ Wc 
wish all success to this little ‘ Nebraska Bill,' 
and hope that when he gets fairly launched 
into the great ‘Committee of the Whole,’he 
will come out safe and blight. We may live 
to see him governor of Nebraska yet—who 
knows?” 
Practical Rhetoric. —Our readers are pro¬ 
bably aware that alliteration signifies that sev¬ 
eral words in a sentence begin with the same 
sound. It is a figure that sometimes adds great 
beauty to a phrase. But it may like other good 
things, be abused. 
Here is an example from the floating litera¬ 
ture of the day:—A phriend pheeling phunnily 
phigurative, phurnishes the phollowing: 
“ 4ty 4tunate 4esters 4tuitously 4tifying 41orn 
4tresses 4cibly 4bade 4midable 4eigners 4ming 
4aging 4ces.” 
The Fruit. —The Terre Haute Express says 
that a gentleman of that place, who pays a 
great deal of attention to horticultural matters, 
thinks that there never was a better prospect 
for a fine crop of peaches than now. 
In my neighborhood of Russelville, Kentucky, 
the peaches are very abundant and the straw¬ 
berries remarkably fine. 
-»—©-<&-©- 
New Thief Trap.—A singular expedient 
was adopted a short time since in Camden for 
catching a thief. The house having been en¬ 
tered several times, a bottle of drugged brandy 
w 7 as placed where it could not fail to be seen, 
and the ingenious plan resulted in the appre¬ 
hension of a colored man, who had partaken of 
the brandy, and was found asleep in the room. 
Good Liquor. —The Columbus ( O .) Demo¬ 
crat says that strychnine is used in the manu¬ 
facture of whiskey, to increase the yield of the 
juice of corn. An analization of pure Cognac 
brandy, at Washington, is said to have shown 
the presence of nux vomica in that liquor. 
-:-» G-O - 
What is “ mean time ?” That which allows 
only twenty minutes to dinner. 
