186 
AMEEICAN AGRICULTURIST 
T35E?! 
rraj-lJooIt. 
SNOBBERY IN NEW-YORK. 
The New-Yorkers beat the world, even Paris, 
on extravagance. In a pungent article on the 
subject, a correspondent has the following: 
“ Countless instances of the reckless extrava¬ 
gance of “ our best society” might readily be 
adduced. We will take the single article of 
dress. We are given to understand, by those 
familiar with the subject, that a lady’s dress— 
lace and jewelry included—such as are worn at 
our balls, is thought quite common unless it cost 
a thousand dollars! That is to say, the fair 
wearer, whose total stock in life in the way of 
intellectual and physical acquirements would 
hardly secure her a living, or enable her to ed¬ 
ucate a son, spends as much in one evening’s 
folly—for the dress cannot possibly be worn 
twice—as the gray-haired book-keeper, or an 
ingenious mechanic, or a skilful foreman printer 
can make in one year. Her night’s gadding 
costs society as much as would support a family 
for twelve months. 
“ And who are the people that wear these 
$1000 dresses? Are they sensible, intellectual, 
honorable, amiable? Have they even the poor 
recommendation of high blood, or hereditary 
respectability? Alas! Snooks’ father was a 
joiner, and his own hands have been hardened by 
the use of the plane. Jenkins grew his own pota¬ 
toes, and supplied fashionable families with the 
vegetables when fashionable people lived in Dey 
street. Slubberlops painted doors and windows 
in his early youth, and Mrs. S. mixed the paint. 
Worse than this, Snooks is a stupid, dog-headed 
clown; Jenkins is mean and narrow-minded; 
Stubberlops believes that Dickens wrote Shaks- 
peare, and that the “Midsummer Night’s 
Dream,” is the work of Mr. Barry, of Broadway. 
Respectable, though ignorant, in the humble 
station in which they began life, they are now 
snobbish, contemptible and extravagant .—Lima 
Weekly Visitor. 
■ - • O I- 
LUDICROUS MISTAKE. 
A Frenchman, newly arrived in London, im¬ 
patient to see the town, but fearful of not find¬ 
ing his way back to the hotel, carefully copied 
upon a card the name painted upon the wall at 
the corner of the street in which it was situated. 
This done, he felt himself safe, and set out for 
a ramble, much upon the principle vulgarly 
known as “following one’s nose.” The whole 
daj^ long he strolled and stared to his heart’s 
content; wearied at last he jumped into a cab, 
and with the easy, confident air of a man who 
felt at home, he read from the card he had pru¬ 
dently preserved, the name of the street he dwelt 
in. The cabman grinned horribly. “This 
English pronunciation is sadly difficult,” said 
the Frenchman to himself, “ he does not under¬ 
stand me,” and he placed the card before the 
man’s eye. Cabby grinned more than ever, 
gazed in his fare’s astonished face, and ended by 
sticking his hands in his pockets, and roaring 
with laughter. 
Indignation on the part of the foreigner; he 
appealed to the passers-by, who gravely lis¬ 
tened to him at first, but upon beholding his 
card, joined one and all in chorus with the 
coachman. The Frenchman now got furious, 
swore, stamped, gesticulated like a candidate 
for bedlam. He went so far as to threaten the 
laughers; a crowd assembled ; every body sym¬ 
pathized with him till they learned the circum¬ 
stances of the case, when they joined in the 
infectious hilarity. Up came the police, those 
guardian angels of bewildered foreigners in 
London’s labyrinth. The aggrieved Gaul felt 
sure of sympathy, succor, and revenge. He 
was never more mistaken. 
The gentleman in blue roared like the rest. 
They evidently could not help it. Compunction 
mingled with mirth, but they nevertheless guf¬ 
fawed exceedingly. To what extremities the 
desperate Frenchman might have proceeded it 
is impossible to say, had not a gentleman ac¬ 
quainted with his language appeared upon the 
scene. He too laughed violently on beholding 
the card, and when he had spoken a few words 
to the Frenchman, the Frenchman laughed like¬ 
wise, which was a signal for a recommencement 
of the general hilarity. The address, so care¬ 
fully copied by the foreigner at the corner of 
his street, was the following—“ Commit no nui¬ 
sance.”— Blackwood. 
HIBERNIAN SIMPLICITY. 
An amusing instance is afforded by the fol¬ 
lowing little story, told us by a friend, in whose 
words we give it: 
“ Molly, our housemaid, is a model one, who 
handles the broomstick like a sceptre, and who 
has an abhorrence for dirt and a sympathy for 
soapsuds, that amounts to a passion. She is a 
bustling, busy, rosy-cheeked, bright-eyed, blun¬ 
dering Hibernian, who hovers about our book¬ 
shelves, makes war upon our papers, and goes 
about thirsting for new worlds to conquer, in 
the shape of undusted and unrighted corners. 
“One day she entered our library in a con¬ 
fused and uncertain manner, quite different 
from her usual bustling way. She stood at the 
door with a letter between her thumb and fin¬ 
gers, which she held at arm’s length as if she 
had a gunpowder plot in her grasp. In answer 
to our inquiries as to her business, she answered: 
“An’ plase yer honor, I’m a poor girl, and 
han’t much lamin’, and ye sees, plase yer honor, 
Paddy O’Reilly, and the betther than him 
dosen’t brathe in ould Ireland, has been writin’ 
of me a letther—a love letther, plase yer honor; 
an’—an’-” 
“We guessed at her embarrassment, and of¬ 
fered to relieve it, by reading the letter. Still 
she hesitated, while she twisted a bit of raw 
cotton in her fingers. 
“Shure,” she resumed, “an’ that’s jist what 
I want, but it isn’t a gentleman like yerself 
that would be likin’ to know ov the sacrets be¬ 
tween us, and so (here she twisted the cotton 
quite nervously) if it ’ill only plase yer honor, 
while j 7 er radeing it, so that ye may not hear it 
yerself, if y’ll jist put this hit of cotton in yer 
ears an' stop up yer hearin ', an' thin the sacrets 
'ill he unbeknown to yer ?" 
“ We hadn’t the heart to refuse her, and with 
the gravest face possible, complied with her re¬ 
quest ; but often since, we have laughed heart¬ 
ily as we have related the incident.”— JY. Y. 
Journal. 
-• « »—— 
A REASONING FOX. 
A certain Jagare, who was one morning 
keeping watch in the forest, observed a fox 
cautiously making his approach towards the 
stump of an old tree. When sufficiently near, 
he took a high and determined jump on to the 
top of it; and after looking around awhile, hop¬ 
ped to the ground again. After Reynard had 
repeated this knightly exercise several times, he 
went his way ; but presently he returned to the 
spot, bearing a pretty large and heavy piece of 
dry oak in his mouth; and thus burdened, as it 
would seem for the purpose of testing his vault¬ 
ing powers, he renewed his leaps on to the 
stump. After a time, however, and when he 
found that, weighted as he was, he could make 
the ascent with facility, he desisted from further 
efforts, dropped the piece of wood, and coiling 
himself upon the top of the stump remained 
motionless as if dead. At the approach of 
evening, an old sow and her progeny, five or 
six in number, issued from a neighboring thicket, 
and pursuing their usual track, passed near to 
the stump in question. Two of her sucklings 
followed somewhat behind the rest, and just as 
they neared his ambush, Michel, with the rapid¬ 
ity of thought, darted down from his perch 
upon one of them, and in a twinkling of an eye 
bore it in triumph on to the fastness he had so 
providentially prepared beforehand. Confound¬ 
ed at the shrieks of her offspring, the old sow 
returned in fury to the spot, and until late in 
the night, made repeated desperate attempts to 
storm the murderer’s stronghold; but the fox 
took the matter very coolly, and devoured the 
pig under the very nose of its mother ; which 
at length, with the greatest reluctance, and with¬ 
out being able to revenge herself on her crafty 
adversary, was forced to beat a retreat.-- Lloyd's 
Scandinavian Adventures. 
——• >• — — 
THE OLD BLACK BULL. 
A Happy Blunder. — The following story we 
heard when a boy, but it will bear repeating. 
The Rev. Mr. Bulkley, of Colchester, Ct., was 
famous in his day as a casuist and sage coun¬ 
sellor. A church in his neighborhood had 
fallen into divisions and contentions whieh they 
were unable to adjust among themselves. They 
deputed one of their members to visit the ven¬ 
erable Bulkley for his advice, with the request 
that he would send it to them in writing. It so 
happened that Mr. Bulkley had a farm in the 
extreme part of the town, upon which he en¬ 
trusted a tenant, and to whom he must have 
been transmitting a letter at the same time. In 
superscribing the two letters, the one for the 
church was directed to the tenant, and the one 
for the tenant to the church. The church being 
convened to hear the advice which was to settle 
all their difficulties, the moderator read as fol¬ 
lows : 
“You will see to the repairs of the fences, 
that they may be built strong and high; and 
you will take especial care of the old black 
bull.” 
The mystical advice puzzled the church at 
first. But an interpreter among the most know¬ 
ing ones was found who said : 
“ Brethren, this is the very advice we most 
need. The direction to repair the fences is to 
admonish us to take good heed as to the admis¬ 
sion and government of our members. We 
must guard the church by our Master’s laws, 
and keep out strange cattle from the fold. 
And we must in a particular manner set a 
watchful guard over the devil, the old black bull, 
that has done so much harm of late.” 
All perceived the wisdom and fitness of Mr. 
Bulkley’s advice, and resolved to be governed 
by it. The consequence was, all the animosities 
subsided, and harmony was restored to the long 
afflicted church. 
The English Language. —The following an- 
nalysis of Gray’s Elegy in a Country Church¬ 
yard, a composition which has been more ex¬ 
tensively read, within a short period, than any 
other in our language, will exhibit the struc¬ 
ture of our vernacular: 
Anglo Saxon.777 words. 
French.168 “ 
Latin.. 17 “ 
Dutch. 12 “ 
German. 6 “ 
Greek. 4 “ 
Celtic. 2 “ 
Scandinavian. 2 “ 
988 words. 
About four-fifths of the words in the English 
language are monosyllabic. The doxology, 
“From all that dwell below the skies,” contains 
fifty words, all but ten of which are monosylla¬ 
bic. The twenty-third psalm contains one hun¬ 
dred and seventeen words, all but twenty-two 
of which are monosyllabic. 
Turkey Seized for Rent. — A gentleman was 
considerably surprised to see a plump turkey 
served up for his dinner, and inquired of his 
servant how it was got. “ Why, sar,” replied 
Cuff, “dat ar turkey hab been roostin’ on our 
fence dese tree nights; so dis mornin’ I thought 
I would seize him for de rent ob de fence.” 
