342 
AMERICAN AGRICULTURIST. 
where the narcotic oil can escape. We once 
heard a person remark, with some truth, “ that 
a quart of such tea would not keep her awake.” 
But in behalf of the children we say, if you must 
let them have tea to drink, except as a medicine, 
by all means cook it a long time in a tin basin or 
other wide, shallow, open vessel, and then dilute 
it homeopathically. 
Hints on Deportment at Home—IV.* 
BY ANNA HOPE. 
{.Continued from page 309. ] 
Nothing that affects our influence is of little 
importance. Our position in society depends 
much upon our manners. A lady is known more 
surely by her manners than by her dress. Silks, 
velvets and laces can be bought with money. The 
proprieties of life are learned only by a delicate 
tact, and an acquaintance with good society. 
Home politeness is rarely considered as of so 
much importance as it really is. We are too of¬ 
ten inclined to treat strangers with more respect 
than those of our own household. Children, es¬ 
pecially, are supposed to have no particular claim 
upon our politeness, and are often treated with as 
little consideration as the dogs which they pet. If 
we would have our children civil to ourselves and 
others, we must be civil to them. A request is 
often better than a command. A kind “ I thank 
you,” is a return the smallest favor may claim. 
Children and servants are entitled to our polite¬ 
ness, as truly as our guests and strangers. 
If we would be civil abroad we must be civil 
in our own homes. We must cultivate the beau¬ 
tiful In our daily life. We must seek for the per¬ 
fect in our manners, as in our morals; and no where 
should we seek to shed such a radiance as when 
surrounded by those whom we love, and who look 
op to us as patterns of what they should be. 
Home should be the sanctuary of all that is holiest, 
of all that is attractive and charming. There we 
should be the most agreeable and lovely, and 
there we should endeavor to develop our idea of 
perfection. 
If we always practice what we know, we shall 
be ever learning more. If we allow ourselves to 
become careless in our manners and our mode of 
life, it will soon be obvious that we are tending 
to barbarism. We can scarcely be too particular 
in regard to our manners in private. A true lady 
is a lady everywhere—in her own room, as sure¬ 
ly as in the most fashionable parlor. 
“ The greatest danger in home life,” writes 
Timothy Titcomb, “ springs from its familiarity. 
Kindred hearts, gathered at a common fireside, 
are far too apt to relax from the proprieties of 
social life. Careless language and a careless at¬ 
tire are too apt to be indulged in, when the eye 
of the world is shut off, and the ear of the world 
■ cannot hear.” If we suffer ourselves to be over¬ 
come by this danger, we need not seek to ap- 
ipear well when we most desire it. We must 
’.have a high idea of what we may be, that we 
‘may continually strive for advancement. “ The 
higher you aim the higher you will reach,” is a 
remark of Fenelon, that early imprinted itself 
on my mind, and it has helped me many times 
to set my standard, where, without its influence, 
SI never could have planted it. 
* The previous chapters containing the engraving of the table 
%t set out,” with the full details for deportment at the table, and 
in company, have been well received and highly appreciated, so 
much so, that they are being extensively republished in other 
journals. A gentleman in high position, remarked a few days 
since, that these articles, though designed for ladies, had been 
of great benefit to him, as he had received many useful hints. 
We have good reason to know, that the younger females of many 
families have considered these articles as of inestimable value, 
and hot a few ex*.ra copies have been called for to sen&4o ih'eir 
friends.—ED. 
We should not be satisfied with anything but 
the best to which we may attain. The cares, and 
labors, and wearinesses of life often tempt us to 
discouragement, but we must be of good courage.. 
We must remember that we cannot afford to lose 
any good we have obtained. We must not suf¬ 
fer our manners to deteriorate, but rather let 
them improve, that we may be able to elevate 
others who have possessed fewer advantages than 
ourselves. 
I have no liking for a parlor with closed shut¬ 
ters and doors, reserved for special occasions, and 
so seldom used that the family hardly know 
whether they are at home or abroad when in it. 
A parlor should be a cheerful, family room, made 
as beautiful and attractive as a person’s taste and 
means can make it. Every parlor should be as 
individual as the person who occupies it. I would 
not willingly resign a house into the hands of an 
upholsterer. I might avail myself of his experi¬ 
ence, but I should wish my own taste to preside 
over it It always gives me a pleasure to enter 
a house unlike others. I have been interested 
in observing how much I can judge of a family, 
merely by the house they live in. The simplest 
cottage may be made tasteful and attractive. It 
does not require wealth to give an air of refine¬ 
ment. It require. 5 little more than an innate 
sense of the beautiful. Some of the log cabins 
of the West have left an indelible impression on 
my mind, as among the most picturesque dwel¬ 
lings I have ever seen. One in northern Ohio, 
with its overhanging roof, and its graceful drapery 
of vines, and the dear old grandmother with her 
neat dress and plain cap, standing in the door as 
I passed, has never been supplanted in my mem¬ 
ory by any city palace or country villa. Were I 
an artist, I should transfer this picture to canvas. 
I would rather live in such a home, surrounded 
by a fine country, than in any stiff, ugly house, 
built and furnished without taste. 
While a parlor should not be shut up from sun¬ 
light and daily life, I would yet have it a room 
beyond others in dignity. A certain attention to 
dress should be required of those who enter it. 
The dress used for labor is scarcely appropriate 
to the parlor ; but when the duties of the day are 
over, I think every family should attend somewhat 
to their personal appearance, and pass the evenings 
together, away from the signs of toil which the 
other parts of the house often present. I know 
it requires an effort to do this, but I think the in¬ 
fluence on ourselves and on our children will more 
than compensate for the trouble. 
The parlor is noplace for lounging. Always en¬ 
deavor to sit gracefully. Do not drop sideways 
into a chair, with your dress all on one side of it. 
Do not be in the habit of putting your feet 
on chairs and sofas. I have seen a young 
lady ensconce herself in an arm-chair, with 
her feet upon the upper rounds of another, when 
gentlemen and ladies were present, with as much 
nonchalance as she would have done it in the 
privacy of her own room. She could not have 
given a more decisive proof of ill breeding than 
by the independent manner in which she thus 
seated herself. 
Do not take possession of the most comforta- 
able seat in a room, unless you are an invalid, or 
an aged person. Do not appropriate a seat con¬ 
sidered as belonging to another ; and, especially, 
do not retain it until that person approaches you, 
or seats herself elsewhere ; and do not drop into 
it the moment she has left it. This is exceedingly 
annoying. 
Do not go about humming or singing in anoth¬ 
er person’s house. Step through the halls quietly. 
Keep your hands off the balusters and walls in 
going up and down stairs, unless you are so fee- 
| ble that you need support. It is enough to make 
a nice housekeeper nervous, to hear the sound 01 
the hand slipping over the bright varnish. 
Let your manners be kind and respectful, but 
never be patronizing. Let your efforts to please 
be so simple and natural, that they may be agree¬ 
able. Be observant and attentive to the little 
wants of those around you. 
Cant phrases are an abomination, and should 
rarely, if ever, be used. I confess, I do not feel 
ashamed of my ignorance, when I cannot under¬ 
stand what they mean. Use the best language in 
common conversation. 
Introduce, under ordinary circumstances, gen¬ 
tlemen to ladies—not ladies to gentlemen. Do' 
not give a double introduction, as, “ Mrs. More- 
head, Mrs. Green : Mrs. Green, Mrs. Morehead”— 
one mention of the name is sufficient. Asa gen¬ 
eral rule, introduce the younger to the older.. 
Age is always entitled to respect. Thus : if Mrs- 
Morehead were the youuger, or in lower rank,- 
say ; “ Mrs. Morehead, Mrs. Green,” emphasiz¬ 
ing Mrs. Morehead’s name. It is often well to> 
mention the place of residence when introducing 
strangers, as that will naturally suggest a subject 
of conversation, without being compelled to re¬ 
sort to the state of the weather. 
Woman’s Wages. 
The paragraph on this topic last month, page 
297, has called out several letters, among others 
a very creditable and well written one by “ A 
Woman,” which she says is her first effort with 
the pen. We did not intend to awaken a discus¬ 
sion on this topic at the present time, but there 
are several important thoughts on this subject, 
aside from the impracticable theories of the more 
ardent advocates of “ Woman’s Rights,” and we 
shall in our next volume devote some space to the 
matter and give one or more of the letters already 
received. In our recent leading articles some 
thoughts have been already expressed on the 
position and labors of women in the family. A. 
number of intelligent readers have spoken of 
these articles as the most important ones in the; 
present volume, especially the one in October. 
-«►-«- *i» —» «- 
Sewing Machines—Good Hews.. 
Nothing occurring during the past uaanth ha® 
given us greater pleasure than to hear of the re-- 
duction in the price of Sewing Machines, by the 
Wheeler & Wilson, and the Grover & Baker 
Companies. Those made by these companies we 
consider decidedly the best for general family use. 
Our friends continually ask, which of the two is 
the better implement. We should have answered 
the question long ago, but really it has been im¬ 
possible to do sQj We have had both the Grover 
& Baker and the Wheeler & Wilson machines 
in our family, for nearly a year—the former one 
over a year—and so well do they both do their 
work, that we are loth to part with either of them. 
Each one has its own peculiar advantages, and 
we unhesitatingly say, that had we the last 
Wheeler & Wilson machine that could be 
made, we would not part with it for a thousand 
dollars; and so also had we the last Grover & 
Baker machine we could get, we would not take 
a thousand dollars for that one. 
We did not, however, commence this item to 
discuss the comparative merits of these machines, 
but to congratulate our lady readers on the fact 
that unexpected large sales, and other causes,. 
have led these companies to reduce the price 
very materially. A very good Wheeler & Wil- - 
