456 
AMERICAN AGRICULTURIST. 
December.] 
Cincinnati under any circumstances, as there is a regular 
ring there.” We must admit that, for a city of its size, 
Cincinnati does very well in the Humbug line; but our 
friend, “A. D.,” is quite too general.One of the 
periodical humbugs—and one that breaks out at this 
season, when long evenings come—is the chap with his 
“beautiful gas-light and safety burned.” 
It is quite old, but none the less dangerous, and must 
meet with success somewhere, else it would not live from 
year to year. The chap with the stuff was recently in 
some of the towns of Massachusetts, and inquiries come 
concerning it. It is a contrivance for burning the vapor 
of naphtha, benzine, gasoline, or some of the light petro¬ 
leum products, and there is no gas whatever about it. 
These articles are dangerous to have about the house, 
with or without a “ safety burner.” Our advice is con" 
densed into 
don’t. 
In the village near which the writer resides, the “gas¬ 
light ” chap came along several years ago. One hotel 
and several stores invested in the “ gas ” lamps. Some 
time after, we heard of trouble at the hotel—more gas 
than was wanted, and much more smoke. It was but a 
few months before these “ safety burners ” disappeared 
from the place entirely. They are dangerous at all times, 
and are a swindle in pretending to be gas, when they 
only burn vapor.That remarkable “Mining Co.,” in 
which an investment of 
“ $1 WILL SECURE A COMPETENCY FOR LIFE,” 
finding New York too small—or one near enough like 
it to be its own brother—has turned up at Calais, Me. 
It is so probable, you know, that a mine which shells out 
no end of ore worth $1,348 per ton, should have its 
headquarters down among the lumber-yards of Maine, 
and be begging people to take it by the dollar’s worth. 
It may be all well enough, but, then, how it looks 1 
A DRY SHAVE FOR FIFTY CENTS. 
A friend in Pennsylvania saw an advertisement of 
“ Clark’s Aromatic Tablets, or Diamond Shaver,” “ war¬ 
ranted to shave any man, without razor, soap, or water ; 
free by mail for fifty cents,” the address being given as 
in East Ninth street. Instead of sending his fifty cents 
to the address, and getting his information at first hands, 
our friends writes to know about the shaver. To send 
from our office up to East Ninth street, and return, may 
take two or three hours, according to the ease of finding 
the parties in that rather “ promiscuous ” part of the 
city. We can not always send a person off on an ex¬ 
ploring expedition off-hand; so we waited for an oppor¬ 
tunity. Probably our Pennsylvania friend’s beard is 
growing in the meantime, and he fears that he may have 
to take to the old fogy “ razor, soap, and water.” So, in 
a few days after, he “ again ” writes “ for information 
about the shaver.” We start a young man at once for 
East Ninth street, with fifty cents in his pocket for 
shaver, and ten cents for car fares. He goes, but is long 
in returning. At last he comes ; he has found the place ; 
several flights up. in some tenement house. Clark & Co. 
evidently propose to do business by mail, and are not pre¬ 
pared to receive customers. Their store was a general 
living-room; their business people, the women and 
children of a tenemeht house family ; their warehouse a 
bureau drawer, out of which came the “ Aromatic Tablet 
and Diamond Shaver.” Seizing the prize, and not for¬ 
getting to deposit the half dollar, the young man re¬ 
turned, and we were the possessor of something. It was 
not “aromatic,” it was not “diamond,” 
BUT IT WAS A “TABLET.” 
It measures 2 in. long, 1J4 in. wide, and % in. thick. It 
hath the color of pummic.e stone, and the texture of 
scouring brick. Did we try it on our beard? Not much. 
We had experienced one shave —sixty cents’ worth—and 
that would do for one day. So far as a superficial ex¬ 
amination goes, the stuff is powdered pummice, stuck 
slightly together, as a fragment dropped into water falls 
to powder at once. This reminds us that we once knew 
a sea captain who kept his beard down by rubbing it 
with a piece of pummice stone, which he carried in his 
pocket for the purpose. If any one wishes this Tablet 
for $2, we will consider the matter. We reckon thus: 
Cash for Tablet, fifty cents; car fare, ten cents ; young 
man’s time, forty cents—$1. As all fancy articles should 
pay at least one hundred per cent, profit, we name $2, but 
do not hold ourselves bound. ..“The melancholy days 
are come, the saddest of the year,” and though there has 
rarely been a finer Autumn, we feel sad, and have to 
“drop into poetry,” even if borrowed, to express our 
sadness. In fact, 
THESE AUTUMN DAYS ARE LONESOME-LIKE. 
With the flowers, the birds, and the gay foliage have 
gone—not. only Russell &Co., but Hetherington <& Co. ; 
at least, they make themselves manifest no longer. In 
the bright summer days, it was a dull one that did not 
bring a dozen, and from that up to a market-basketful 
of their nicely-printed circulars. These had such a jolly 
lot of names on them that it seemed quite sociable, and 
when we could see—oh, ever so many times a day—that 
by just going and paying $15 we could get no end of gold 
watches and chains, valued at $150—and make $135 
over and over again. Then, when we think how we 
neglected our opportunities, and when we reflect that no 
more of these offers come from R.’s & Co. or H.’s & Co., 
well may we say, “ The melancholy days have come.”_ 
Please do not ask our opinion of these 
WALL STREET SCHEMES, 
wherein some genius has found out how other people 
can make a fortune out of a dollar—provided you will 
only send it to him, or those who print a lot of jargon 
about “ privileges, puts, calls, and straddles,” words of 
which we are sure our inquirers do not know the mean¬ 
ing. We repeat to these the old gambler’s advice to the 
young one: “ Never play a game you do not understand.” 
When letters began to come concerning this Wall street 
gambling, we did the best we could for our readers. We 
went to men of high standing, who deal in stocks in a 
legitimate way. We were assured by them that none of 
those who are trying to extend Wall street practices to 
the prairies and back woods, have any business standing 
at the Board ; we asked what advice to give concerning 
these schemes, and received for reply, 
“ TELL ’EM TO LET ’EM ALONE—LET ’EM ALONE.” 
We have done all that we can do in these cases, and we 
can not really find time to repeat by letter what we have 
on other occasions printed, and here print again, as a 
general and complete answer to every scheme and propo¬ 
sition of the kind.Now is the season, or soon will 
be, of poultry shows. Those who expect to take prizes 
with Leghorns, Plymouth Rocks, and others, will be no¬ 
where alongside of 
KING DAGOBERT’s FOWLS. 
It doesn’t matter who old Dag. was, except he was a 
king, and had some gardens. When Abbe Somebody 
went to build a church on the ruins of Dag.’s chateau and 
gardens, he fouud a hen’s nest, with a whole settin’ of 
eggs. These eggs, being 2,500, more or less, years’ old, 
were being about to be thrown away, when a “ savant ” 
was consulted—those are chaps they have in France, and 
call them so because they “s'avey” a thing or two. 
Savant hit upon a splendid way of finding out if those 
“eggs was eggs.” Did he candle’em? No. He said 
“ set ’em,” and they were sot. In twenty-one days the 
question was settled. To make it short, the Abbe has 
kept the Dagobertian fowls pure; and now, wanting to 
feed the poor of his parish, he don’t do it at first hands, 
and give them chicken pie, but he—. The Abbe is about 
to organize (they always organize in France) a sale of 
King Dagobert’s eggs. Don’t all rush at once, for we 
may as well record our belief that we don’t think that 
that breed will flourish unless fed upon wheat raised 
from that found in the mummy boxes. 
Bound. Copies of this volume, and. of every 
previous volume back to Vol. XVI. (1857), neatly bound, 
with gilt backs,Index, etc., are supplied at $2 each (or 
$2.30 if sent by mail.) See Publishers’ Notes, page 454. 
Subscription Receipts Not Sent.— 
It is impracticable, next to impossible, to forward re¬ 
ceipts for subscription money received. Money for¬ 
warded according to directions (page 454), is very rarely 
lost. The receipt of the paper is evidence of receipt of 
money. Those specially desiring acknowledgment, can 
enclose a postal card directed to themselves, and write 
on the back of it just what they want said. Then, on 
opening a letter, the postal card will be dated and signed 
at the office, and put into the mail. 
Music at Low Rates. —Oue of our 
associates, who is musically inclined, says that White, 
Smith <fc Co., Boston, Mass., who have long advertised 
in our columns, send in their “Folio” choice selections 
of new music, at a remarkably low price. 
Ao Farewell Words. —Though closing 
a year, we offer no farewell words, because we expect to 
meet all the members of our household at the beginning 
of the New Year. We try to consider every regular 
reader of this Journal as a member of our family, whose 
interests are to he jealously guarded and promoted in 
every possible way, and the multitude of kindly expres¬ 
sions of appreciation of this mutual relation, continually 
coming to us, are of inestimable value, and the greatest 
reward of our labors. We hope ever to merit this good 
will, and in the coming year we shall continue to spare 
no effort to increase the mutual respect and kindly feel¬ 
ing hitherto existing between the editors and readers of 
the American Agriculturist. Everything that intelli¬ 
gence, industry, earnest effort, and liberal expense can 
do, will be done to make the next Volume one of unpre¬ 
cedented excellence. 
for Half Price or Nothing.—The 
Microscope elsewhere offered, is certainly equal to any 
instrument ever before sold under $2.75. We can put it 
at only $1.50 for the reasons given. It is well worth a 
place in every household. As offered with the American 
Agriculturist , it reduces the cost of each to half price, or 
calling one full price, the other costs next to nothing. 
Please 'I'eli Friends and Neigh¬ 
bors of the splendid opportunity now offered to get a 
good, useful Microscope and the American Agriculturist 
for all of 1878, at but a trifle more than either has hither¬ 
to cost. Every family ought to have them, and would 
do so at once if they knew of their real value. 
A. ‘ 6 Bahers Dozen ” for 1© Days. 
—To new subscribers for 1878, received prior to Decem¬ 
ber 10, we will send this number without extra charge 
this is 13 months for the price of 12. 
Over !©,©©© People have received valu¬ 
able Premium Articles from this office free , with satis¬ 
faction to themselves and to the publishers, and profit to' 
those they induced to subscribe. There ought to be 
50,000 people gathering up such premium lists this 
month, at least one at every post-office. If no one else is 
pushing the work on, will the reader look after it ? The 
premiums are excellent and worth the small labor re¬ 
quired to get them free. 
Sport of a Ciirysantliemum.—“ C 
W. W.,” sends from Lewistown, Pa, a branch of a chry¬ 
santhemum, with flowers of two distinct kinds; some 
are pale rose, and others with yellow and brownish 
petals. Mr. W. suggests that this may be due to a cross¬ 
ing, through the agency of insects, with the pollen of 
other flowers, but this could not well happen. It is not 
rare for plants to sport in this manner ; especially in 
those garden varieties which have been produced by 
numerous crosses, and the “blood” of which, so to 
speak, is much mixed, it often happens that a branch 
will produce flowers unlike the rest of the plant. Several 
of our choice roses have been produced in this manner, 
by bud variation, as it is termed, the sporting branch, 
being propagated, its peculiarities are perpetuated. 
'Fu.DeroMss —These, at least in 
some localities, are likely to become popular as bedding 
plants, and also for the summer decoration of green¬ 
houses. Mr. H. P. “Worcester, gardener for Daniel Bar¬ 
ker, Esq., of Norfolk, Va., sent us in October last, a box 
containing flowers and foliage of those raised by him, 
as we infer, from seed. The flowers presented a great 
range in color—from white and salmon to the deepest 
scarlet—and also in size, while the foliage was finer, in 
colors and markings, than any we have before seen. We 
are glad to know that others are more successful with 
these plants than we have been. When the seed was 
first offered, some five or six years ago, we at some ex¬ 
pense procured two packets from one of the prominent 
seedsmen of Paris. A fair crop of plants was obtained ; 
they were grown one year for their tubers, of which they 
made fine and large ones ; the second year they came in¬ 
to flower, and every one, without exception, though the 
foliage showed some variety, gave a miserably insignifi¬ 
cant white flower, and the whole lot went to “ the heap.” 
Our Exports.—The rapidly increasing ex¬ 
port business offers interesting matter for consideration. 
Oil looking over a list of exports from one port we find 
railroad passengercars shipped to Cuba and Brazil; coal to. 
South America and the West Indies; car wheels to Brazil 
and Holland; locomotives to Russia and Brazil; ma¬ 
chinery of different kinds to England, Holland, and Brazil; 
nails to Peru, Brazil, and the West Indies; iron pipes to 
Cuba; Agricultural implements to Germany, France, and 
South America ; paper, leather, petroleum, and soaps to 
England, Germany, and many other countries, and cotton 
goods to China, India, and England. For a beginning, 
this list is of more than ordinary interest and promise. 
Value of* Lobster Refuse.—“ J. A. 
McL.,” P. E. Island. The refuse of a lobster canning fac¬ 
tory, when dry, if it could he freed from the shelly por¬ 
tion, is of about equal value with fish scrap. The shells, 
are of much less value than the refuse meat. The whole, 
when green from the factory, would probably be worth 
two dollars a ton. The best mode of utilizing it would 
he to dry and grind it to powder, using about two or 
three tons per acre, or else to make it into a compost 
with earth or peat. 
Carbonic Acid CJas.-“J. C.,” Wis. r 
asks how to neutralize Carbonic Acid in a tight dark 
room. The natural reply would be to ventilate—but 
then the room would cease to be tight. It is very diffi¬ 
cult to answer questions in which the conditions arc 
