314 
AMERICAN AGRICULTURIST. 
“A little humor now and then, 
Is relished by the best of men." 
SUSIE SUNSHINE. 
- « — 
Little Susie Sunshine 
Trippeth like a fay, 
O’er the velvet green-sward. 
O’er the clover gay ; 
Merrily a tune she singeth. 
(As the cheery school bell rrngeth.) 
Of the merry May. 
On her arm a satchel, 
In her hand a book ; 
Now she sings her carol, 
Now with sober look 
Bends demurely o'er its pages, 
As if love of ancient sages 
Her young mind partook. 
One by one the letters, 
Conning of each word. 
With an accent tuneful. 
Like a forest bird ; 
O’er and o’er again repeating 
Her hard lesson, and, a greeting 
On the May conferred. 
Mingling work with pleasure, 
Task with joyous song. 
Darling little Susie, 
Here is nothing wrong ! 
Though your elders talk of duty 
And eschew the joy and beauty 
Which to life belong. 
PAT AND THE- YANKEE. 
A Pat—an old joker—and Yankee, more sly, 
Once riding together, a gallows passed by ; 
Said the Yankee to Pat, “ If I don’t make too free, 
Give that gallows its due, where then would you be 
“ Why, honey said Pat, “ faith, that’s easily known ; 
I’d be riding to town—by myselfall alone !” 
Singular —To see a boarding-school miss 
afraid of a cow, notwithstanding she “did 
all the milking tu 1mm” a few months pre¬ 
vious. 
“ Please exchange,” as the printer said 
when he offered his heart and hand to a 
young lady. 
A cotemporary, speaking of the report on 
gentlemen’s fashions, says, “ There is not 
much change in gent’s pants this month.” 
Very likely. 
A Tobacconist of Dublin, who had retired 
with a large fortune, saw fit to set up his 
carriage, and asked the celebrated John 
Philpot Curran, to furnish him a motto for 
the pannel of his coach. He immediately 
wrote down for him, these words, Quid rides. 
In Latin, meaning, “why do you laugh.” 
Witty. —There are people who talk with 
their whole body. The Frenchman talks 
with his arms, shoulders, and head ; a Yan¬ 
kee with his eyes and face. 
A certain member of Congress from one of 
the Eastern States, was speaking one day on 
some important question, and became very 
animated, during which he grimaced terri¬ 
bly, which set a brother member, his oppo¬ 
nent on the question, to laughing. This an¬ 
noyed him very much, and he indignantly 
demanded to know why the gentleman from 
was laughing at him. 
“ I was smiling at, your manner of making 
monkey faces, sir,” was the reply. 
“ Oh !” I make monkey faces, do 1 1 Well, 
sir, you have no occasion to try the experi¬ 
ment, for nature has saved you the trouble 
The hammer was distinctly heard amid a 
roar of laughter, calling the house to order. 
THE SONG OF THE SIX HUNDRED. 
The following is one of the most thrilling 
war poems ever produced. It has no equals, 
or, at. most, but one—Campbell’s “ Hohen- 
linden.” It is from the recent pen of Al¬ 
fred Tennyson, one of the first living poets, 
and refers to an occurrence near Sebastopol, 
where six hundred horsemen were—by blun¬ 
der or carelessness—ordered to charge upon 
a large battery of cannon manned by fifteen 
or twenty thousand Russian soldiers. The 
poem tells the whole story. Read it through 
and then recall the impression left upon the 
mind by the closing words of the fifth and 
sixth stanzas. The whole poem will im¬ 
prove to the tenth reading and onward. 
THE CHARGE OF THE LIGHT BRIGADE AT BALAKLAVA. 
Half a league, half a league, 
Half a league onward, 
All in the valley of Death 
Rode the six hundred. 
Into the valley of Death 
Rode the six hundred, 
For up came an order which 
Some one had blundered : 
‘Forward, the Light Brigade !’ 
’Take the guns,’ Nolan said. 
Into the valley of Death 
Rode the six hundred. 
‘Forward, the Light Brigade !’ 
No man was there dismayed, 
Not though the soldier knew 
Some one had blundered; 
Theirs not to make reply, 
Theirs not to reason why, 
Theirs but to do and die, 
Into the valley of Death 
Rode the six hundred. 
Cannon to right of them, 
Cannon to left of them, 
Cannon in front of them 
Volleyed and thundered ; 
Stormed at with shot and shell. 
Boldly they rode and well, 
Into the jaws of Death, 
Into the mouth of Hell 
Rode the six hundred. 
Flashed all their sabres bare, 
Flashed all at once in air 
Sabring the gunners there, 
Charging an army, while 
All the world wondered ; 
Plunged in the battery smoke, 
With many a desperate stroke 
The Russian line they broke ; 
Then they rode back, but not— 
Not the six hundred. 
Cannon to right of them, 
Cannon to left of them, 
Cannon behind them 
Volleyed and thundered; 
Stormed at with shot and shell. 
While horse and hero fell, 
Those that had fought so well 
Came from the jaws of Death, 
Back from the mouth of Hell, 
All that was left of them, 
Left of six hundred. 
When can their glory fade ? 
O the wild charge they made I 
All the world wondered. 
Honor the charge they made. 
Honor the Light Brigade, 
Noble six hundred ! 
It is no small commendation to manage a 
little well. He is a good wagoner that can 
turn in a little room. To live well in abun¬ 
dance, is the praise of the estate, not of the 
person. Study more how to give a good 
account of your little, than how to make it 
more. 
CONUNDRUM EXHIBITION. 
Hengler, of the Exeter Circus, England, 
attracted a large audience recently by the 
promise of a prize of a silver goblet to the 
author of the best original conundrum. 
Shortly before ten o’clock a platform was in¬ 
troduced for the literary part of the enter¬ 
tainment, which Flengler mounted, having a 
bundle of conundrums in his hand. With the 
conundrums was a variety of enigmas and 
charades, but these were laid aside. The 
audience were to decide the merits of the 
different conundrums, and in order that their 
task might be as easy as possible, Hengler 
divided the conundrums into what he con¬ 
sidered lad and good. Among those pro¬ 
nounced by him as bad were the following : 
W'hy is the prize to be offered by Mr. C. 
Hengler like a treaty stated to be offered to 
the Emperor of Russia 1 —Because it was 
made for jive sovereigns. 
Why should the allies and the Russian 
Emperor each send an army of tailors to 
Sebastopol ? Because one can make breaches 
in the walls, and the other mend them. 
If you saw your wife drowning, what let¬ 
ter in the alphabet would you name 1— Let- 
her-be. [The ladies exhibited signs of dis¬ 
pleasure at the cruel answer.] 
When one lady kisses another, what com¬ 
mand of Scripture does she fulfil ?—I do unto 
others as I would that men should do unto 
me. 
What is the most difficult operation that a 
surgeon can perform ?- Taking the jaw out 
of a woman. 
According toHengler’s discrimination, the 
following were the good conundrums : 
What is the difference bet ween a bottle of 
doctor's physic and the Emperor of Russia? 
The one requires to be first well shaken and 
then taken, but the other requires to be first 
taken and then well shaken. 
What is the trade of a Lancaster gun?— 
Drcec/iex-maker to her Majesty. 
Why is a schoolmaster like a chairmaker ; 
Because he canes bottoms. 
Why will England never be in debt to 
Russia?—Because whenever charges are 
brought against us vve return them with 
interest. 
If a person falls into the water at Cowley 
Bridge, how wet rvillhe be ?—Wet in the Exe 
stream. 
Why is the British army like a looking- 
glass ?—Because it can not be beaten with¬ 
out being destroyed. 
Why is a weary night traveler in Glou 
cestershire like the wounded soldiers at 
Scutari ?—Because he is cheered by the pres 
ence of the Nightingale. 
WTiyis the circus to-night like a marriage 
feast ?—Because the enjoyment of the ring, 
pledged in a goblet, results in a bumper. 
Why did the Alderman and Town Coun¬ 
cil of Exeter reelect John Daw, Esq., as 
Mayor?—Because it is usual in Cathedral 
towns for a Jack Daw to occupy the highest 
position. 
The conundrums having been read, Heng¬ 
ler inquired of the audience what one they 
had selected, upon which a general cry of 
“ Jack Daw’.’arose, and it was considered 
that to the author of that conundrum the cup 
would be awarded. When the uproar had 
ceased, however, solitary voice sung out, 
“The Nightingale.” This was caught up by 
others, and in a few moments “ The Nightin¬ 
gale” was heard in every part of the house. 
This was then declared the best conundrum, 
and the author, a young man named Jewell, 
entered the ring from the gallery seats and 
received the goblet amid enthusiastic cheer¬ 
ing. 
