Mr.  and  Mrs.  Clever  Watch  the  Trend 
of  the  Times. 
WAS  very  sorry  to  miss  accompanying  you  to¬ 
day,  my  dear,”  said  Mr.  Clever,  laying  down  his 
paper.  “  I  think  I  should  so  enjoy  seeing  the  improve¬ 
ment  in  our  fairs  since  the  days  of  my  boyhood.  Did 
you  have  an  enjoyable  day  ?  ” 
“  In  one  sense,  yes.  I  gained  a  good  fund  of  amuse¬ 
ment.  But  regarding  the  fair  as  a  fair  in  its  legitimate 
lines,  I  doubt  if  it  is  as  much  of  an  advance  over  the 
ones  you  remember  as  you  are  inclined  to  suppose.” 
“  But,  Mathilde,  I’ve  just  been  reading  the  reports, 
and  may  be  supposed  to  know  a  little  something  about 
what  is  going  on.  There  were  nearly  500  head  of  fine 
live  stock,  much  of  it  registered  ;  350  sheep  and  swine, 
as  fine  as  the  country  affords,  or  can  import ;  a  large 
exhibit  of  splendid  roadsters  ;  2,000  head  of  poultry, 
and  more  than  as  many  entries  in  fruits  and  flowers. 
Isn't  that  material  enough  for  a  rare  exhibition  ?  But 
then,  you’re  a  woman  with  the  rest,  and  I  suppose  you 
looked  askance  at  the  trotting  track,  voted  the  cattle 
and  sheep  a  bore,  and  spent  the  day  mostly  in  exclaim¬ 
ing  at  the  ‘dear  little  tiny  chicks’ in  the  brooders, 
and  in  studying  the  crazy  quilt,  and  standing  in  the 
door  of  the  women’s  tent  groaning  with  the  ‘  sisters  ’ 
over  the  wickedness  of  the  tvorld  in  general  and  of  the 
men  in  particular.” 
“  Solomon,  if  you  are  not  ashamed  of  that  fling,  I 
am  ashamed  for  you  !  I  am  not  a  whit  more  likely  to 
study  crazy  quilts  than  you  are  ;  and  I  looked  care¬ 
fully  at  everything  worth  attention.  The  cattle  were 
grand  ;  but  they  are  a  real  source  of  difficulty,  after 
all.  I  want  to  read  you  what  the  Journal  said  this 
morning.  Note  this  :  ‘  The  army  of  fakirs  was  larger 
than  ever;  every  possible  catch-penny  device  that  could 
be  put  in  use  was  being  urged,  and  there  were  various 
games  of  chance  in  full  swing,  and  well  patronized  by 
the  “  hay-seed  ”  element.’  What  the  agricultural  fair 
really  needs  to-day,  Solomon,  is  the  elimination  of  the 
live  stock,  and  of  the  ‘  hayseed  ’  element.” 
“  What  !  the  farmers?  Mathilde,  I  really  thought 
you  had  more  sense.” 
“Certainly;  they  are  what  hinders  it  from  being 
the  success  that  it  might  otherwise  be  ;  they  and  their 
stock.  Take  away  the  cattle  and  poultry,  the  ma¬ 
chinery  and  all  the  horses  except  those  belonging  to 
the  trotting  men,  and  you  will  be  rid  of  this  unfortu¬ 
nate  ‘  hayseed  ’  element,  and  can  make  ground  for 
more  of  the  real  attractions  which  constitute  a  fair. 
Even  to-day  I  noticed  that  the  farm  teams,  etc.,  took 
so  much  time  and  space  that  the  races  were  necessarily 
curtailed ;  and  the  cattle  covered  so  much  ground  that 
not  more  than  nine-tenths  of  the  people  saw  the 
prize  fight.” 
“Oh,  come,  now,  Mathilde!  Of  course  everybody 
would  want  to  see  the  great  champion,  and  you  needn’t 
call  that  little  sparring  match  a  prize  fight.  I  saw  it 
advertised,  and  I  vow  I  wouldn’t  have  minded  seeing 
how  it  is  done  myself.” 
“  It  would  be  against  the  law  if  it  was  called  a  prize 
fight,  would  it  not?  And  you  wouldn’t  go  to  see  one, 
Solomon  ;  that  would  be  against  the  law,  too  !  ” 
“  Of  course.  And  I  really  think  that  the  news  sheets 
that  published  such  enthusiastic  accounts  of  the  great 
championship  fight  gave  the  whole  thing  away  when 
they  spoke  of  the  ex-champion  ‘  lying  in  the  ring  like 
a  slaughtered  beef!’  Pity  somebody  outside  hadn’t 
said  that  instead.  But  this  little  match  for  sport - ” 
“Precisely,  for  sport;  don’t  hesitate,  my  dear.  It 
has  come  to  be  sport  for  the  class  of  people  who  can 
afford  to  patronize  the  fairs,  to  see  this  gentlemanly 
champion,  this  man  who  ‘  comes  of  a  refined  family,' 
and  who  therefore  ought  to  have  some  sense  of  de¬ 
cency,  fight  with  his  trainer,  to  show  how  he  fights 
to  kill  or  maim  when  he  fights  outside  the  pale  of  the 
law  !  Oh  !  and  I  was  at  the  W.  C.  T.  U.  cottage  !  They 
had  a  gospel  temperance  meeting  there  ;  but,  don't 
you  know,  I  am  afraid  that  all  the  people  for  whose 
especial  benefit  it  was  held  were  out — seeing  the  prize 
fight.  ‘  The  attraction  outside  the  exhibits  and  the 
track  features  to-day  was  the  visit  of  the  champion 
pugilist;’  the  Journal  says.  Listen  ;  These  two  are 
from  the  same  issue  : 
1.  By  an  effort  which  shows  great  enterprise  the 
managers  of  the  fair  have  succeeded  in  arranging  for 
a  sparring  and  training  exhibition  to  take  place  at 
2.30  p.  m.,  on  a  raised  platform  which  will  be  erected 
in  front  of  the  grand  stand,  and  in  full  view  of 
everybody. 
2.  A  disgraceful  affair — a  bloody  fight — knocked  out 
in  three  rounds.  That  an  example  has  been  set  by  the 
Sullivan-Corbett  event  which  recently  took  place,  was 
plainly  demonstrated  this  noon,  when  two  young  as¬ 
pirants  for  the  much  coveted  belt  gathered  in  a  lot  in 
the  Eighth  Ward  and  fought  three  bloody  rounds. 
These  young  brutes  were  under  the  age  of  16  and  a 
large  crowd  of  school  children  urged  them  on  to  deeds 
of  valor.  What  about  the  fair  and  the  children  ? 
Oh  !  If  I  had  children - ! 
O,  well,  you  cannot  turn  the  world  upside  down, 
Mathilde.  Elevating  or  not,  it  is  evident  that  the 
people  want  to  see  these  things.” 
“  Yes ;  that  is  why  I  say  give  the  one-third  space 
that  the  exhibits  now  take  to  something  more  attract¬ 
ive.  And  there  is  the  Governor  ;  he  comes  to-morrow, 
but  even  he  cannot  draw  like  the  beef-slayer.  Better 
eliminate  him,  too.” 
Two  red  spots  flamed  in  pretty  Mrs.  Clever's  cheeks. 
“Dear,”  said  Mr.  Clever  uneasily  at  this  point,  “  did 
you  eat  anything  to-day  that  has  not  quite  agreed 
with  you  ?  ” 
“Indeed  I  did;  clam  chowder  for  lunch.  It  was 
quite  too  rich  for  me  ;  but  I  think  you  would  enjoy  it 
immensely.  Only  15  cents  I  paid  for  it,  and  deliber¬ 
ately  stole  the  recipe  for  you.  But  it  hardly  seemed 
wrong,  you  know,  for  I  got  it  by  quantitative  analysis.” 
“  On  the  spot,  Matilde  ?  ” 
“  On  the  spot,  my  love.  You  would  never  haye  be¬ 
lieved  it  to  be  chowder  from  the  looks  ;  never  did  I  see 
anything  so  like  in  appearance  to  tomato  soup.  But 
that  is  old,  and  cheap.  It  was  chowder ,  real  clam 
chowder.  But  I  thought  I’d  never  find  the  clam. 
My  first  analysis  brought  to  the  surface  an  inch 
square  of  coarse  stew  beef  ;  a  second,  two  inches  of 
carrot ;  the  third,  a  bit  of  onion.  But  after  faithful 
search  I  discovered  the  third  part  of  a  clam  ;  and 
later,  another  flake,  thus  proving  the  genuineness  of 
the  dish.  You  see  this  was  agricultural  clam  chow¬ 
der,  and  it  would  have  been  an  insult  to  the  manage¬ 
ment  to  ignore  the  vegetables  and  the  beef.  Surely, 
you  see  it  so,  Solomon  ?  ’ 
“  Your  opinion  generally  carries  mine,  my  dear. 
And  was  that  all  ?” 
“  All  but  the  important  factor  which  our  friend,  Mr. 
Collingwood,  is  so  fond  of  bringing  to  the  fore  in 
reference  to  making  farm  produce  sales — the  rest  was 
water.  You  shall  have  some  to-morrow,  Solomon, 
and  test  it  for  yourself.  Don’t  forget  to  buy  the  clam 
to-night.  MYRA  V.  NORYS. 
“Antidotes”  for  Physical  Sins. 
Extract  from  a  lecture  by  Dr.  J.  H.  Kellogg,  of  Michigan. 
WISE  doctor  said  to  me  not  long  ago  that  it  is 
one  of  the  most  popular  fallacies  in  the  public 
mind  that  a  person  can  violate  the  laws  of  health  for 
a  long  period  of  time,  and  then  antidote  the  effects  of 
his  sinning  by  swallowing  a  few  drops  of  medicine. 
The  real  method  of  getting  well  is  to  grow  into  health, 
and  the  practices  which  made  you  sick  must  first  of 
all  be  carefully  avoided.  A  sick  man  must  be  cured 
like  a  sick  tree.  Suppose  you  have  evidence  that  one 
of  your  favorite  shade  trees  is  ailing — its  bark  is 
rough,  its  leaves  small  and  lustreless  and  falling  off. 
Would  you  get  somebody's  “  all-healing  liniment  ”  and 
rub  it  on  the  bark,  or  inject  a  “hypodermic  ”  remedy 
under  the  bark,  or  dig  down  until  you  found  one  of  its 
large  roots  and  bathe  it  with  medicine  ?  Nothing  of 
the  sort ;  you  would  treat  it  on  a  rational  plan  if  at 
all.  If  you  found  parasites,  you  would  cleanse  it  of 
them,  you  would  dig  around  the  roots  and  exchange 
the  old  hard  earth  for  soil  that  was  rich  and  moist ; 
you  would  see  that  it  had  plenty  of  water,  and,  if  a 
tree  of  less  value  kept  away  the  sunshine,  you  would 
cut  down  the  cuinberer.  A  sick  man  should  be  treated 
on  the  same  rational  plan,  and  furnished  with  the 
right  environment  and  proper  conditions  to  secure 
Nature’s  cooperation  in  the  struggle  to  regain  lost 
health. 
The  same  laws  prevail  for  cultivating  health  in  the 
human  body  as  for  cultivating  corn  in  the  field.  The 
soil  must  be  prepared  and  the  little  plant  carefully 
tended.  Suppose  a  man  should  come  to  a  farmer  and 
say,  “  I  have  a  peculiar  solution  here  in  which,  if  you 
will  soak  your  seed  corn  before  planting,  the  very  next 
day  the  ears  will  be  ripe  and  ready  for  harvesting.” 
No  farmer  would  be  taken  in  by  such  a  fraudulent 
claim,  but  plenty  of  men  are  found  ready  to  believe 
claims  equally  fraudulent  and  against  the  operations 
of  Nature  with  regard  to  curing  disease.  Dr.  Some¬ 
body’s  “  Weak  Stomach  Tonic”  is  warranted  to  reju¬ 
venate  a  poor  dyspeptic  and  make  him  perfectly  well 
in  a  week  or  a  month,  and  that  without  any  attention 
to  diet  !  Is  this  more  reasonable  than  the  claim  of 
raising  a  crop  of  corn  in  24  hours  by  soaking  the  seed 
in  some  kind  of  a  “tonic  ?”  Such  superstitions  with 
regard  to  the  effects  of  medication  are  relics  of  a  dark 
age.  The  way  to  get  well  is  to  stop  sinning  against 
your  physical  nature  and  to  seek  to  know  the  laws  of 
health  and  obey  them. — Helen  L.  Manning. 
Economy  and  Prettiness  in  Small 
Gowns. 
THE  mother  who  has  four  or  five  little  ones  to  sew 
for  has  a  fine  chance  to  economize,  and  not  a 
half  yard  of  cloth  ever  need  go  to  w’aste.  If  the  mother 
is  careful,  a  half  yard  of  blue  gingham  will  make 
pretty  sleeves  for  a  brown  checked  gingham  or  a  dark 
navy  blue  dress.  A  yard  of  cloth  will  make  yoke  and 
sleeves,  while  another  remnant  will  make  the  skirt  of 
a  pretty  little  Mother  Hubbard  for  one  of  the  little 
ones.  When  I  buy  wash  goods  or  dress  goods  of  any 
kind  I  buy  what  J  know  will  not  fade.  I  get  10  yards 
of  gingham  or  calico  of  one  kind.  The  oldest  two  girls 
each  have  a  dress  alike,  made  generally  plain  waist 
and  full  skirt ;  there  is  then  enough  left  to  combine 
with  other  material  into  a  nice  dress  each  for  the 
two  smaller  girls.  One  way  I  have  of  making  dresses 
I  like  so  much  I  will  tell  you  about  it.  I  make  a  waist 
lining  of  any  old  cloth,  then  make  a  yoke  and  sleeves, 
say,  of  turkey  red  or  navy  blue,  then  I  make  sleeveless 
aprons  to  go  over  them,  the  aprons  being  as  long 
as  a  dress  should  be.  Thus  they  will  wear  to  school  a 
red  waist  and  navy  blue  apron  or  over-dress  one  day, 
and  next  day  change  around,  or  they  wear  white 
aprons  over  the  blue  or  red,  or  white  waists  with  black 
or  other  dark  colored  over-dresses.  Now  the  Princess 
dress  has  again  come  into  style  I  mean  to  make  some 
for  our  girls,  I  think  them  so  pretty.  For  best  dresses 
our  oldest  girls  have  red  or  blue  waists  with  dark 
over-dresses;  also  white  over-dresses  with  the  red 
waists  for  cold  days,  they  being  worsted,  while  on 
warm  days  they  wear  pink  or  blue  chambray  under 
the  white  over-dresses,  or  full  suits  of  chambray,  or 
the  chambray  over  white  waists ;  thus  having  many 
changes  for  little  money.  Nothing  suits  me  so  well 
for  children  in  wash  goods  as  chambray.  Our  two 
younger  girls  are  wearing  dresses  now  that  have  been 
worn  for  six  years  constantly,  as  aprons  in  winter  and 
dresses  in  summer,  yet  they  are  nearly  as  bright  and 
good  as  when  new.  I  make  our  girls  neat  little  caps 
out  of  heavy  cloth  for  winter  wear,  and  make  their 
Sunday  hats  out  of  velvet.  It  costs  me  thus  for 
Sunday  hats  less  than  75  cents  apiece  for  what  would 
cost  me  in  the  store  several  dollars,  In  fact,  one  yard 
of  velvet  at  75  cents  makes  two  pretty  hats,  and 
three-quarters  of  a  yard  of  velvet  makes  our  three- 
year-old  a  nice  bonnet.  I  also  make  the  baby’s  white 
bonnets  and  those  of  our  little  three-year-old  too. 
MABEL  H.  MON8EY. 
*  *  * 
Spanish  Ambition  in  Food. — In  Spain  the  puch6ro, 
says  the  Home  Magazine,  is  everybody’s  dish  twice  a 
day  if  it  can  be  afforded.  The  puch6ro  is  ordinarily 
made  by  simmering  for  four  hours  finely-cut  lumps  of 
bacon  and  beef  (often  varied  with  bits  of  mutton,  fowl 
and  fish)  in  one  pot.  In  another  all  manner  of  edible 
vegetables  are  placed  and  stewed  until  tender,  and 
to  these  are  often  added  bits  of  chopped  sausage  or 
pork  for  seasoning.  The  vegetable  mess  is  cooked 
low,  that  is,  until  it  is  a  mass  of  pulp.  This  is  first 
placed  in  a  large  receptacle,  when  the  contents  of 
the  other  olla,  which  have  also  been  cooked  until 
tender  and  savory,  are  turned  upon  the  former.  The 
highest  ambition  of  the  peasant  is  that  he  may  have 
bacon  or  other  meat  in  his  puch<5ro  every  day  of  his 
life;  and  anyone  who  has  partaken  of  this  delicious 
and  savory  dish  with  a  good  appetite,  whetted  by 
miles  of  tramping,  behind  the  grateful  act,  will  know 
how  to  honor  his  humble  longing. 
There  is  nothing  in  a  physician’s  life 
that  gives  him  more  satisfaction  than 
seeing  the  prompt  effect  of  Scott’s  Emul¬ 
sion  of  cod-liver  oil  in  bringing  back 
plumpness  and  color  to  thin  and  pale 
children. 
“  Poor  baby  !  ”  Everybody  sees  the  sad 
picture.  No  one  but  the  physician  ap¬ 
preciates  it.  He  knows  what  dangers 
threaten  thin  children. 
Let  us  send  you  a  book  about  thinness. 
Scott  &  Bownb,  Chemists,  182  South  5th  Avenue,  New  York. 
Your  druggist  keeps  Scott’s  Emulsion  of  cod-liver  oil— all  druggists 
everywhere  do  $1 
