MOOllE’S EU11AL NEW-YORKER! M AGRICULTURAL AND FAMILY NEWSPAPEE. ^ MY m*' 
156 
cits Iflttry. 
Written for the Rural New-Yorker. 
THE DRUNKARD’S WIPE AND CHILD. 
It was a drear and wintry night, 
And fiercely blew the blast; 
No star shed forth its cheering light, 
The snow was falling fast. 
The cold white drift upheaved its head 
In many a barrier wild, 
Round the cheerless cot where in scanty bed, 
Lay the drunkard’s wife and child. 
No food nor fire that dreadful night, 
Had the drunkard’s wife and child. 
And where was he who fondly swore 
To cherish and defend ; 
Who was, in happy days before, 
The dearest earthly friend ? 
0 ! step by step from virtue’s way, 
The Tempter, Rum, beguiled ; 
And now the fiend has perfect sway, 
He hates his wife and child. 
For madd’ning revelry forsook, 
Were the drunkard’s wife and child. 
No neighbor came, nor passer by, 
To bring the needful aid ; 
No sound of human footstep nigh 
Their gloomy fears allayed. 
No word of comfort, or of cheer, 
The suffering hours beguiled,— 
O ! what the anguish, the despair, 
Of the drunkard’s wife and child 1 
None here can know that last night’s woe, 
Of the drunkard’s wife and child. 
Next morn when winds had spent their might, 
And sunk to hollow moan ; 
The pausing traveler saw a sight 
Would melt a heart of stone. 
For there beneath that humble shed, 
Half crowned with snow-drifts piled, 
All cold and stilt upon the bed 
Lay the drunkard’s wife and child. 
Death kindly came and gave relief 
To the drunkard’s wife and child. 
West Bloomfield, N. Y. J. H. H. 
* IflflSflttfl. 
SPRIN G EP ISODE. 
IN A FAMILIAR RURAL EPISTLE. 
Dear Mr. Editor: — Your interesting and 
rural sheet is not confined by any means to the 
“Rural Districts I find, for I meet it almost 
everywhere—“in cities and in cottages,throng¬ 
ed haunts and ” new, uncultivated wastes, like 
these parts from which I write. Everywhere, I 
say, in parlor and kitchen, I see the New- 
Yorker —always well worn too, which shows 
that it is well read. I dare say they make corn 
cakes after its recipes in Georgia; and plant 
and sow, and prune, and graft, and gather ac¬ 
cording to its maxims and advice, in all the 
States of this happy Union ; and laugh and cry 
too, over its other good things, as they arfe 
moved to mirth, or tears,—do they, its readers, 
the young and old, from Maine to Florida! 
Well, it is pleasant to spread a feast weekly, 
for so many, and have them come to it so eager¬ 
ly, and go away so more than satisfied. But, 
as I intimated, Mr. Editor, it is a benighted 
region hereabouts ; (not hopelessly so, either, 
since they do take the Rural, ) albeit it is with¬ 
in a few miles of one of the world’s greatest 
wonders, and in the very county bearing its 
name. The vicinity of so august a personage 
(of course I’ve not been so unfashionable as to 
visit it this winter,) is to me, what the neighbor¬ 
hood of Coleridge was to Chas. La jib, “ as ex¬ 
citing as th a presence of fifty ordinary persons.” 
Its proximity has nearly made a poet of me 
on two several occasions, but I could never 
get further than a couplet or two, and those in 
the style of another would-be poet, who ex¬ 
claimed : 
“ O God what a tremendous water-power, 
I never see nothing similar !” 
Some one has said that whoever attempts to 
apostrophize the mighty cataract in verse, is to 
be pitied. I agree with that some one ; and 
commiserate all such,—including myself. But 
it is something to be within hearing of Niaga¬ 
ra’s nightly roar. I go out in the morning 
sometimes, and hear a voice like Memnon’s of 
old time, saluting with sublime cadence the 
rising sun—and I stand at eventide beneath 
the solemn stars and the grand anthem still 
goes up from an earth-born source ; but it min¬ 
gles harmoniously with the music of the spheres! 
“The world has one Niagara,” and it is ours— 
it is here. In less than a half hour’s time, trav¬ 
eling by car, I could greet, face to face, its awful 
front, hoary witli the lapse of ages, and hoarse 
with sounding, since creation’s dawn, “ the eter¬ 
nal bass in Nature’s anthem !” And yet I stay 
away and imagine it. 
But this is not what I was going to say, dear 
Rural. I took up my pen, in the first instance, 
to congratulate you upon your usefulness, your 
success, and—since you take so great an interest 
in seed time and harvest, and their regular and 
prompt succession and continuance—to con¬ 
gratulate you also upon the return of one of 
those seasons. I take the liberty to inform you 
that the winter being “over and gone,” and the 
time of the singing of birds having come, there 
is no delinquency on the part of the “ unnum¬ 
bered tuneful throats.” They do sing. The 
“ feathered choirs,” so far as I have heard, are 
now organized and in “full blast” at all con¬ 
venient stations; and if you will accept for 
harbingers, frogs, instead of “ turtles,” I can 
also assure you that their “ voice is heard in the 
land” quite uninterruptedly, and by everybody 
who “ has ears to hear ” anything. Spring has 
arriv' —April is going to be April, after all. 
She “fooled” us some in the commencement— 
(but that is according to custom)—holding out 
her hands lovingly, as if to greet her subjects 
warmly, but when you grasped them, the fingers 
were all icicles!—pointing to patches of blue 
skv and flecks of sunshine overhead, and invi¬ 
ting you out for a walk, but no sooner did you 
array yourself and go, than a raw, mischief- 
loving young gust struck you rudely in the’face 
crying “April Fool!” How vexatious !—was 
it never going to be spring, you asked. 
But now the jesting is over and the “ cold 
term” too, we trust. Winter has retreated. It 
was hard to “oust” the old tyrant, and “ Heav¬ 
en’s artillery” had to be put in requisition. 
That thunder storm the other night, did the 
business. The whole scudding battalion of 
hail, snow and frost fiends, with lances shivered 
and fragile bloodless spears, were driven, with 
the Ice King at their head, far over the “North¬ 
ern Battlement ” into Hyperborean space, that 
night. The morning showed no traces of the 
conflict, except that the old tyrant had vanish¬ 
ed, evidently ; and a new and brighter dynasty 
been inaugurated. The sun shone all day lov¬ 
ingly and warm, and went to bed under a rosy 
canopy—and the wind blew over the brown, 
bare fields balmy as that of June ! Hail, Queen 
of Seasons ! Hail! (once more) verdure, and 
laughing showers ! Hail, song and sunshine, 
and rosy hours! Hail Spring! Again there 
will be sunsets, and scented airs, and melody 
in groves, and peaceful agricultural pursuits, 
and fragrant horticultural delights, and Eden 
toil and pastime succeed each other as of old. 
Aye, Spring has come ! How many voices it 
hath, as we listen. I heard, just now, the mur¬ 
mur of a waterfall and started down the road 
to find it—and, sure enough, the great snow 
bank that had lain there for a quarter of a— 
year, had glided down into a last year’s chan¬ 
nel, and was running merrily away, laughing 
to be free, and glad to hide itself from the 
fierce glances of the sun. A “ fast ’ young 
brook had thus got itself set up on transient 
capital, (the liquidation of that bank,) and was 
making its way over obstacles, loose stones and 
rubbish, with much of the haste and noise 
characteristic of such short-lived aspirants. I 
dabbled in it for awhile and thought of its brief 
life and destiny, and what a type it was of 
prattling childhood, or perhaps, more aptly, 
ambitious youth ; but most of all, I loved it just 
now for the message that it brought of Spring. 
All sounds that tell us of the coming on of 
warmer days, and kindlier skies, so long o’er- 
cast, are welcome, and give us delight. “Sounds 
inharmonious in themselves, and harsh,’ like 
the din that resounds at nightfall in yonder 
woods, please on account of what they prophesy. 
There has just flown in upon my musingsone 
of those great winged bugs, that haunt people’s 
doorways at twilight in the early spring, and 
blunder in and out unceremoniously—up against 
the window and the wall—into your face very 
likely, and into the candle certainly, if you have 
one, with all the headlong instincts of the spe¬ 
cies. But I overlook the intrusion as I capture 
the intruder; I even pet the awkward mummer* 
glad to greet all insect life in that capacity; and 
tolerant, for that same selfish reason, of the 
myriad “creeping things.” Glad tokens all of 
—Spring! 
Dear Rural—I have thus made your ac¬ 
quaintance—introduced a topic, and rambled on, 
just as tho’ you were listening delightedly.— 
Were you ?—or, do you bear with my garrulity, 
for the sake of the theme, (which must be pleas¬ 
ant to you likewise,) just as I seek out, and am 
glad to see awaken, the humble life beneath me 
_because of the season which it ushers in. We 
shall see. Meantime,—I am yours, 
Very respectfully, 
Lu Linwood. 
Elm Hollow, April, 1866. 
whom he had not yet had the pleasure of an 
interview; but it was his intention, when he 
had seen them all, to select one he most ap¬ 
proved, and honorably to marry her. 
The gentleman was then allowed to retire, 
amid the laughver, mingled with applause, of 
the fraternity of fifty ! 
Another advertisement was answered in the 
name of Miss “ Annie Woodville.” Some cor¬ 
respondence ensued, as to marriage and itsiel- 
ative duties ; but the “lady” having ventured 
to suggest an interview in Rochdale, the adver¬ 
tiser took alarm, and wrote to her, acknowedg- 
ing the kind attention shown to him, but inti¬ 
mating that he was in the habit of rising too 
early in the morning to be induced to pay a 
visit to Rochdale. 
Another adventure proved more successful.— 
All the preliminaries in the case having been 
satisfactorily settled, an arrangement was made 
for the advertiser to meet the lady who had fa¬ 
vorably responded to his appeal. Here is the 
literal copy of the letter, accepting the invita¬ 
tion to an interview : 
“ Manchester, the 21st of March. 
Dear Wojian —I received yours at the Guar¬ 
dian office of the 20tli, to which I reply, how 
that I will meet you, at the Rochdale station, 
at 12 of the clock, on Thursday next, ensuing 
the date thereof. 
N. B. You may recognize me, with a piece 
of writing paper something like your note, car¬ 
rying it in my right hand, hanging it down at 
full length of the arm, by my side. From L. 
98. J - ICay -” 
On the receipt of this interesting illiterate 
epistle, a female servant in one of the hotels in 
Rochdale was induced to personate Mr. J. K.’s 
fair correspondent, and after a brief interview 
at the Rochdale railway station, where lie ap¬ 
peared making the signal described, he con¬ 
sented to accompany the lady to Tweedale’s 
Hotel —the head-quarters, it would seem, for 
these tender meetings. On arriving there, he 
was received by a number of gentlemen assem¬ 
bled, with such marks of attention as soon con¬ 
vinced him that he was caught in a snare un- 
matrimonial, and he became very desirous to 
retire ; but his friends were reluctant to lose his 
agreeable company so soon. 
The bellman was sent around town with the 
following announcement :—“ In view, a gentle¬ 
man in want of a wife. May be seen at No. 3, 
Tweedale’s Hotel.” Of course this brought a 
large accession of admiring friends, and one of 
the company having adroitly, and unperceived 
by Mr. J. Kay, stuck a white star or cockade on 
the front of his hat, he was readily distinguish¬ 
ed, and received his complement of undivided 
attention. Visitors flocked into the room in 
rapid succession, each in turn being introduced 
by a master of ceremonies to the gentleman 
who had advertised for a wife. This continued 
till it was too much for the endurance of Mr. J. 
Kay; he became ill, wept, and implored per¬ 
mission to depart; and at length, after having 
been detained several hours, he was allowed to 
go, on paying for a bottle of wine to solace his 
tormentors. A few more such denouements, and 
who would advertise for a wife ? 
“ Nails !” said he. “ Eh, Bill, let’s examine 
the article and see !” and he caught hold of my 
horse by the bit. 
Quick as lightning I drew my pistols, and 
pointing a muzzle to each of their hearts, said : 
“ Gentlemen, make a motion to draw a weap¬ 
on, and that motion seals your fate !” 
They were completely taken by surprise, and 
wheeling their horses around, struck off into 
the forest. After getting a few rods off, one of 
them raised his fist in a threatening attitude.— 
I drew the trigger of my right hand pistol, and 
the villain’s arm fell upon the saddle ; and ut¬ 
tering a yell of agony, they darted off into the 
woods. I reloaded my pistol, struck my spurs 
into my horse’s sides, and after ten miles of the 
fastest riding I ever experienced, I reached a 
log house, where I put up for the night. 
Two years after the incident just noted took 
place, I was traveling down the Mississippi on 
an old fashioned boat, when my attention was 
attracted to an individual on board whom I 
thought I had met before, but where I could 
not tell. I was determined to follow him up, 
and see if I could not call to mind where we 
had met, and under what circumstances. At 
last 1 found an opportunity to get a look at him, 
as he was seated on an old barrel-head earnest¬ 
ly engaged in a game of “seven up.” I step¬ 
ped up, and looking over his shoulder, perceived 
that two fingers of his right hand were missing 
The game progressed, until, in an exciting mo 
ment, he arose, and shaking his fist in the face 
of his opponent, in answer to some remark of 
the latter concerning the game, exclaimed : 
“ I swear you lie !” 
I placed my hand upon his shoulder and 
turned him around: 
“Ah ! ha !” exclaimed I, “we’ve met before! ’ 
Lifting his maimed hand, his face turned as 
white as a sheet, and, hoarse with passion, he 
vociferated : 
“Yes, we have met before, in the woods of 
Tennessee, and I have sworn that you shall die! 
Take that!” 
And the wretch attempted to draw a pistol 
from his coat, but the trigger caught in the rag¬ 
ged lining of his pocket—it went off, and he 
rolled over into the muddy waters of the Mis¬ 
sissippi—a corpse ! — Life in the West. 
ADVERTISEMENTS. 
the HOLLAII NEWSPAPER, PHILADELPHIA. 
Only One Dollar per Year to Single Subscribers.' 
ANOTHER ORIGINAL NOVELETTE. 
In order to accommodate all wno wisu to begin with the be¬ 
ginning of our next original Novelette, 
THE BORDER ROVER, 
BY EMERSON BENNETT, ESQ., 
We have decided to defer it a few weeks, until those wishing to 
perfect their Clubs shall have time to do so. Say until about 
the 1st of July, when our half year commences 
THE DOLLAR NEWSPAPER 
Is made up with special reference to the family circle. It aims 
to interest, instruct and amuse. News and substantial infor¬ 
mation are its prominent characteristics. With monster ma¬ 
chines, capable of printing each 20,000 copies per hour, its col¬ 
umns can be held open for news, each week, to within a few 
hours of the date of publication. It is thus enabled to publish 
the latest and most reliable market reports, and to give a 
greater amount of general business information, for the low 
subscription price of one dollar per year, than any other family 
paper gives for two dollars. 
THE FARM, AND THE FARMER. 
The Agricultural Department of the “Newspaper” is spirit¬ 
edly maintained by contributions, from practical farmers, and 
by thousands of readers this department is considered one of 
the most important features of the paper: Theoretical and 
practical agriculture, thus blended and compressed weekly into 
a short space, cannot fail to interest and profit readers 
The following are the Terms per year: 
Only One Dollar per year to single subscribers. Clubs ol Six 
for $5. Clubs of Thirteen, $10. Clubs of Twenty, $15. Clubs 
of Twenty-seven, $20. Clubs of Thirty-four, $25. Clubs of 
Fifty, $35. Clubs of Seventy-five, $50. 
Our friends, for their own profit, as well as our convenience, 
will oblige by handing in as early as possible their Club lists. 
For the small sum of One Dollar, or less, fifty-two numbers 
of the paper are given, containing in the aggregate fourteen 
hundred and fifty-six compact and closely-printed columns, 
equal to six thousand six hundred book pages, or about twenty- 
two volumes of the common library size of three hundred pa¬ 
ges each. Only think of it! Twenty-two volumes of reading, 
fresh, and most of it original, for less than one dollar ! 
No subscriptions acknowledged unless accompanied with the 
money. Address WM. M. SWAIN & CO 
May, 1856. 330 w2 
SEYMOUR & MORGAN’S PATENT 
* An old English word, I think, meaning usher, herald, 
or something of that sort. 
ADVERTISING FOR A WIFE. 
A STARTLING ADVENTURE. 
In tlie summer of 1815, I was traveling on 
business in the western part of Tennessee.— 
That portion of the State which lies between 
tlie Tennessee and the Mississippi was at that 
time a wild, dreary forest. No roads—nothing 
but horse-paths—through the woods; and the 
only marks to guide the traveler upon liis jour¬ 
ney were the “ blazes” and “ notches” upon the 
trees. I was dressed in true backwoods fash¬ 
ion, and I rode a fiery mustang, with a mane 
and tail as white as snow, a beautiful arched 
peck, and an eye like an eagle. He was a per¬ 
fect beauty, and as fleet as the wind. Across 
liis hack I had thrown a pair of saddle-bags, 
containing on one side a dozen “ pones” of corn 
bread and a piece of bacon, and to balance them 
there was a “pile of rocks” in the other end in 
the shape of two thousand dollars in gold, 
which I had collected and was transporting 
them o a hank in Kentucky, to be disposed of 
for eastern exchange. Two large wooden stir- 
Studying Latin. —The New Era relates a 
story of a young farmer whose son had for a 
long time been studying Latin in a popular 
academy. The farmer not being perfectly sat¬ 
isfied with the course and conduct of the young 
hopeful, re-called him from school, and placing 
him at the side of a cart one day, thus address¬ 
ed him: 
“ Now, Joseph, here is a fork, and there is a 
heap of manure and cart; what do you call them 
in Latin ?” 
“Forkibus, cartibus, et manuribus,” said Jo¬ 
seph. 
“ Well, now,” said the old man, “ if you don’t 
take that forkibus pretty quickibus, aud pitch 
that manuribus into that cartibus, I’ll break 
your lazy backibus ?” 
Joseph went to workibus forthwithibus. 
IMPROVED, NEW YOIiK SELF-RAKING REAPER 
WITH MOWER ATTACHMENT. 
The success of our Self-raking Reaper has induced us to 
manufacture for the harvest of 1856, a larger number of Ma¬ 
chines than we have built in auy previous year. 
Experience has proved that our Self-Rake not only saves the 
hard labor of a man, but does the work much better, leaving 
the grain in better shape than the best hand rakes, and without 
perceptible increase of drangnt. ... 
Wo have many improvements to our machine oi last year, 
such as Spring Seat, and the making the Gear Frame of Iron, 
Ac., and have, after many experiments succeeded in attaching 
a shorter Cutter Bar, to onr Gear Frame, with smooth edged 
knife, and higher motion, for mowing, which makes the best 
combined machine before the public. 
We invite the attention of those interested, to the following 
points of excellence in our machine : . 
1 The Gear Frame is made of Iron, and not liable to spring 
or become misplaced, thus impairing the working of the ma¬ 
chine. and it is more durable than any other material. 
2. The simplicity, durability, and perfect working o! the 
gearing, including that which drives tlie Kake. 
3. The perfect manner of laying the grain for the binder—bet¬ 
ter than the best hand rakers. , . .. . . 
4. The ease with which the operator may regulate the size o! 
tlie bundle, a slight pressure of the foot upon the pedal stop¬ 
ping the Kake at any point, without interfering with tlie cutting. 
5 The lightness of draught for the team ; the absence ot side 
pressure, and the ease with which it passes overuneven ground, 
from the large size of the ground wheels. 
6 The case with which it may be backed or turned. 
7. The width of Cut with good driving 6K ieet 
8. It leaves the grain outside the track of horses, so that any 
amount may be cut without binding. ,_ 
Tlie reaper is so constructed that the Mower Bar may be at¬ 
tached at any future time at a cost of $25. , .. 
We again offer our acknowledgments to our fi lends, the Far 
mers, for their liberal patronage, and shall endeavor, by prompt¬ 
ness ill executing orders and tlie use ot none but tlie best ma¬ 
terials, and the employment of the best mechanics, to ment its 
continuance. 
REFERENCES. 
P E Van Alstyne, Kinderbook, N. Y.; Mayher & Co.- 197 
Water street, N. Y. City.; Hon. E. B. Holmes, BrockporL N. \.; 
Jesse H. Fisk, Stafford, N. Y.; J A. Tyler, Hector, N. Y.; Syl¬ 
vester llarmon, Wheatland, N. Y.; Recife Brothers, Alloways- 
toivn N. J.; Wm. Crane, Goshen, Ind.; J.G. Taylor, Lafayette, 
I lid.; A. Harwood, Elgin, Ill.; Elias D Terry, Aurora Ill.; II. 
L. Rogers, Kendall. Ill.; J. B. Gillett, Peoria, Ill.; W. M. Car- 
roll, Jacksonville, Ill.; L. M. & S. M Howard, Girard, Ill.; G. 
Terry and G. W. Cory, Jerseyville, Ill. 
Price of Reaper at the Factory, with usual extras, $1WJ — 
Mower Attachment, additionaU*^^ & co 
Brockport, N. Y. 329w2eow 
Our columns, says the Manchester Guardian, 
have recently contained several advertisements 
for a wife, and of some of these, certain wags 
in Rochdale have taken advantage, to play off 
some very successful hoaxes on the advertisers. 
One of these would-be Benedicts, in conse¬ 
quence of a correspondence with a Miss“Lavi- 
nia,” proceeded the other day to Tweedale’s ,,, , 
Hotel, Rochdale, in theliope of meeting the.fair I ™ps hung dangling from my saddle, and the 
one who had so kindly responded to his press¬ 
ing invitation to give him an interview ; but 
though he displayed the tokens previously 
agreed upon, no “ Lavinia” met his expectant 
gaze. His disappointment, however, was some¬ 
what lessened by a young gentleman greeting 
him by name and introducing himself as a 
brother of the lady, for whose absence he pro¬ 
ceeded to apologize. Another gentleman en¬ 
tered, who was introduced as a second brother 
of “Lavinia,” and he was speedily followed by 
a third, a fourth, and so on till the candidate 
for matrimony might have exclaimed with 
Macbeth— 
“ A fourth ! Start eyes ! 
What! will the line stretch out to the crack of doom ? 
Another yet! a seventh—I’ll see no more 1” 
Suffice it, that, before all the fifty brothers of 
“ Lavinia” had been introduced, the advertiser 
became rather painfully sensible of the fact 
that he had been most vexatiously duped. One 
of the brothers, stepping upon a chair, road 
aloud, amid much laughter, all the correspond¬ 
ence which had passed between the gentleman 
and the “ lovely young Lavinia.” The adverti¬ 
ser, though said to he an extensive vinegar 
manufacturer, manifested no acidity on the oc¬ 
casion ; on the contrary, he frankly acknowl¬ 
edged that he had been taken in, and threw 
down a sovereign to he spent by the extensive 
brotherhood. He added that he had that morn¬ 
ing, at the Victoria railway station, Manches¬ 
ter, met the seventeeth lady who had replied 
to his advertisement, and there were others with 
bolsters in front contained two beauties, in the 
shape of enormous pistols. Over these, to keep 
them dry, were the squirrel-skin covers. 
I had been riding for several hours, swim¬ 
ming the rivers that crossed my path, snuffing 
in the rich perfume of the forest flowers, watch¬ 
ing the squirrels playing about in the tree tops 
and listening to the music which issued from 
the throats of the thousand of bright winged 
songsters with which the woods abounded. I 
had not seen a solitary human being since morn¬ 
ing, and night was rapidly approaching ; in 
deed, it had already begun to grow dark, and I 
had made up my ind that I would have to 
“ camp out” for the night. I was looking around 
to select some good place, when I was startled 
by the neighing of a horse ahead of me, and 
presently I saw two men approaching me on 
horseback. They were rough looking fellows, 
dressed in hunting shirts, and with squirrel-skin 
caps on their heads. I did not like their looks, 
and, unseen by them, I drew up my pistols, and 
cocking them, replaced them in the holsters, 
and casting my eye forward, I saw one of the 
men make a motion I did not like. I resolved 
that if they proved to be what I suspected, I 
would give them a hard fight, and die bravely. 
“ Pshaw ! what a fool I was !” thought I, as 
they rode up and We me good evening. AVe 
conversed for a few minutes, when one of them 
said : 
«My youngster, what have you got in your 
saddle-bags that rattles so ?” 
“ Nails,” I replied. 
A Rhymstee in Lijibo. —A practical genius 
was hauled up before one of the Police Magis¬ 
trates for kissing a handsome girl, and kicking 
up a dust—and the following examination took 
place : 
Mag.—Is your name John Ray ? 
Pris.—Yes, your honor, so the people say. 
Mag.—Was it you that kissed the girl and 
raised the alarm ? 
Pris.—Yes, your honor, hut I thought it was 
no harm. 
Mag.—You rascal, did you come here to ( 
make rhymes ? 
Pris.—No, your honor, but it will happen 
sometimes. 
Mag.—Be off, you scamp, get out of my sight. 
Pris.—Thank’ee, your honor, then I’ll bid you 
good night. 
FROM MAINE TO MINNESOTA. 
People send to tho “ Genesee Seed Store” fof choice seeds 
for spring sowing. We have now in store and for sale at the 
lowest cash prices : 
100 bu. medium Clover seed. 
200 “ Timothy Seed. 
150 “ Red top do. 
100 “ Ivy. Blue Grass do, 
100 “ Orchard Grass do. 
200 “ large Marrowfat peas 
100 “ Early June do. 
200 “ “ Kent do. 
500 “ Field do. 
300 “ Fife spring wheat. 
200 bu. Club spring wheat. 
50 “ Potato Onions. 
100 “ Best Early Potatoes. 
20 “ Osage Orange Seod. 
200 lbs. Orange Carrot. 
100 “ long white do. 
500 “ Mangold Wurtzel 
500 “ Sugar beets. 
1,000 “ assort, field turnips. 
What’s in a Name ’—About the funniest 
thing we have lately seen, is the list ol names 
appended to a protest by Chinese gentlemen of 
New York city against some of their vagabond 
countrymen, who are in the habit of imposing 
upon the charitable. The names are as follows : 
A. Low, A. Hoy, A. Park, A. Chee, A. Ty, A. 
Fop, A. Fook, A. Look, A. Hong, A. Gong, A. 
Long, A. Sung, A. Yan, A. Chung, A. Wy, A. 
Iloa, A. Tim, A. On, A. Hip, A. Keu, A. Tcliu, 
A. Tsing, Buh Sin, Li Sin, Li Ge, Se Gin, Jang 
On, Tong Sung, Hung Chung, Chu Hong, Fook 
Tong, Tu Hong, At Chun, Com Jun, Tong Ling, 
Yang Hong, Hong Chiu, and Tom Mow. 
What must a Chinese Directory be ? 
And a full assortment of the very best of Agricultural and 
Garden Seeds, both imported and Araericafi grown. 
All orders for anything in our l ln (' unH h^romjiUyjiUended 
t0 '32*i.3tcow 65 Buffalo st.y Rochester, N. Y. 
STATEN ISLAND 
FANCY DYEING ESTABLISHMENT. 
Office, No. 3 John St., two Doors from Broadway, N V. 
Dve Ribbons, Silks, Woolen and Fancy Goods, in the piece 
or otherwise, of every description. Their superior style ol dye¬ 
ing ladies and gentlemen’s garments is widely known. 
Crape Shawls dyed the most brilliant or grave colors , all 
kinds of Shawls, Curtains, &c., cleansed or re-dyed. 
Goods received and returne^b^mss^^ & CQ _ 
326wl3 No. 3 John St., 2 doors from Broadway, N. Y. 
HEREFORD HULL CHARLES THE 2D FOR SALE. 
Mr. Georce Clarke, of Springfield, Otsego Co., will sell 
his bull “Charles tho 2d,” five years old last November. He 
is one of the best Hereford Bulls in this country, and is only 
offered for sale, as his owner desires another c ros s on stock 
sired by him. Address GEORGE CL ARKE 
33Q W 2 Springfield, Otsego Co., is. 
ROCHESTER SEED STOKE, No. 4 Fogg’s Agricultural 
Building, Buffalo street, Rochester, N. Y. All kinds ol Garden 
Seeds, supplied to merchants, on commission. Clover and I lm- 
othy Seed. American and Imported Seeds, wholcs ale dre' 
tail Apple Seeds. [319-eow-tfJ JAS. P. FOGG. 
FARM FOR SALE.—122acres, one mile east of Honeoye 
Falls; well adapted to grain growing or dairying; well watered; 
very good buildings; 10 acres timber. Y e™8 easy. 
327w3eow HORACE WAH.M.K. 
Advantages of a Good Library. —One of the 
advantages is keeping a circulating library for 
the use of your friends. Some of your books 
are returned, but the majority of them are 
lost. Out of those that do find their way 
back, the greater number are enriched with a 
number of pencil marks, and most valuable mar¬ 
ginal notes. However, you must not suppose 
you enjoy all the privileges of a circulating 
library ; for although yon let your books, un¬ 
derstand clearly that the borrower is by no 
means answerable for the loss of them, any more 
than you yourself are entitled to charge two 
pence a day per volume as long as they are 
out.— Punch. 
A Yankee has just invented a suspender that 
contracts on your approach to water, so that the 
moment, you come to a puddle it lifts you over, 
and drops you on the oj^rosite side. 
DAGCEKKEOTYFES — Accurate, elegant, unsurpassed 
pictures taken in clear or cloudy weather. Particular attention 
TiOORE’S RURAL NEW-YORKER, 
THE leading weekly 
AGRICULTURAL, LITERARY AND FAMILY JOURNAL, 
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