W ! TH 
* - 
M EW PATENT AGENCY- DB A WIN c and 
11 tNCRAVINC ON Wood in Alt ITS BRANCvftS SV CEO. 
rRA\iEN6ERCER,Kp.6o ARCADt ftocHtsttn N. V, 
OOD AND CHEAP BOOKS FOR 
WIT A2TD HUMOR 
West— Well, what did you do about it V 
Stranger —Why, I went right down to the bar 
and inquired of the bar keeper if he noticed 
the man that came up to take a drink with me 
and left before drinking. ‘ 0, yes,’ said he, 1 but 
I don't know him.’ Well, thinks I, that beats 
ail creation. I have often heard the various 
modes of swindling here in New York, but I 
never dreamed that was one of them. 
West —I don't wonder the New York Legisla¬ 
ture makes laws for this city, and I wish they 
would make a law to hang every pocket hook 
dropper in it. Now and Teen. 
New York, May. 1R67. 
I will find him, aDd make him give it up.” So 
off we started and found the dropper only a 
few feet off behind a country market wagon. 
My friend walked right up to him and seized 
him by the collar, and said he, “ give me that 
pocket book, it belongs to this gentleman for I 
saw Lim drop it.” ‘‘No you did’nt,” said the 
dropper; “its mine, for 1 found it,” “That’s 
played out,” said my friend, “and if you will 
give it up this gentleman will reward you.” 
“ How much will you give,” said the dropper. 
Now, you see Mr. Mooke, I knew it wan’t mine, 
but I thought I might just as well have it as 
him, and if it shouldjbe advertised get the re¬ 
ward, for you see as I came up to the fellow he 
had the book open and 1 could see lots of bills 
in it: J thought about two thousand dollars’ 
worth ; so 1 Offered him twenty-five dollars lor 
it and he refused that, and at last I gave him 
fifty dollars and oil' he went, and I thought I 
had made a big thing. 
M .—How much money did it contain ? 
W. —Well, sir, not one dollar. You see the 
bills that I got a peep at proved to be all coun¬ 
terfeit, and the iDside of the rolls was only 
waste paper. When I found that out I guess 
I was wrathy. There was my good fifty dol¬ 
lars gone in the pockets of those miserable 
scoundrels. 
M. —Why did yon not go back and have them 
arrested and recover yon money V 
W. —Well, 1 did go back with that Intention, 
but when I got there I thought 1 would just 
step over to one of those market stauds and 
make some inquiry Ju regard to them before I 
begau. 1 had no sooner got there than sure 
enough there were the identical rascals at work 
at another countryman; and during the fore¬ 
noon that I remained there 1 should think they 
tried over twenty persons, and in many cases 
their victims went oil' with them. 
M. — Where were the police all thi6 time ? 
Most certainly they did not stand quietly by and 
sec it going on. 
W.— Well, sir, they did —and did not offer to j 
interfere with them, and 1 was told that the 
cause of it was, that, when a dropper made a 
good haul the policeman could always find out 
the amount from their victim, and make the 
dropper give him a portion ol' it, or arrest him. 
One policeman, whose beat included Washing¬ 
ton Market, was offered thirty dollars per week 
to let those scamps operate on his beat, but 
being an honorable man he refused the offer. 
31. — How many of these men operate in the 
locality you speak of? 
IF —Well, sir, I counted sis, one of them 
being an old gray headed man—I should think 
over sixty years of age'; the others are young 
men. 
.1/. — Then you did not try to recover your 
money ? 
W .—No sir. I found it was no use. The 
money was gone, and I had paid well for my 
experience; but 1 don’t care as much about 
loosing the money as I do to know how the 
story leaked out. 
31. — Do these men make money at this busi¬ 
ness? 
M .—Make money! I should think so from 
what I saw and heard. Why, sir, that evening 
while sitting in the Hotel talking to a gentle¬ 
man that looked kind of domestic like, 1 hap¬ 
pened to speak of these villiuns, and said he, 
“have the pocket book droppers been at you 
too?” Saidl, “1 guess they have.” Said he, 
“ shake hands brother, that's my case exactly.” 
“What kind of a game did they play oil you?” 
said 1. “ 1 will tell you,” said lie: “As I was 
standing on the corner of Fulton and West 
streets, looking at. old Washington Market, I 
fel't something strike uiy leg. I looked down 
and saw an old gray headed mau pick up a pock¬ 
et book and off he went. Almost instantly a 
man stepped ap to me and said he, * stranger 
have you seen anything of a pocket book* lay¬ 
ing around here ?' Says I, 1 yes, 1 just saw a 
man pick one up and go down the street.' Says 
he, 4 1 wish you would go with me and show me 
the man.’ *1 will do so,’ said I; and off we 
went; so just as we got to the corner of Dey 
street I saw the fellow going across the street-, 
and we put after him and caught him on the 
dock. The stranger said to him, ‘where is my 
pocket book?’ ‘I baiu’t got your pocket 
book,’ said he. Saidl, ‘you have got it, 
it, for I saw you pick it up.’ ‘ What kiud of a 
book was it,’ said the dropper. 1 Why, so and 
so,’ says the 6trangcr, giving a description of 
it. Still the dropper denied haviDg it. ‘You 
have got it and 1 will make you give it up 
mighty soon,’ says the 6trauger, seizing the 
dropper by the throat. Well, that was rather 
rough play for him, so said he, * what reward 
will you give me if I will give it up.’ Said the 
stranger, ‘I will give you one hundred dollass.' 
‘Well,’ said he, ‘give rue the money and yon 
shall have it.’ So the stranger said to me, ‘ my 
friend 1 find that all the money 1 have with me 
is in that pocket book, and that’s five one thou¬ 
sand dollar bills, and if you will lend me the 
money to pay this man you can take the book 
and take it up to the Hotel, and then I will get 
one of the bills changed and you take your pay 
out and give the balance to me.’ Well, you 
see, I thought I was all safe. So I pulled out 
the greenbacks and gave the dropper a one 
hundred dollar bill, receiving the pocket book 
in return. We then went up to tire Hotel, aud 
the stranger said, ‘take a drink?' Said I, ‘I 
don’t care if I do;’ aud just as our drinks were 
handed to us, said the stranger, ‘ excuse me a 
moment, I 6ee a friend in the hall that I wish to 
speak to.’ ‘ Certainly,’ said I; and took a drink 
and sat down to wait for the stranger; but I 
soon got tired and went to my room; and I 
tbotight while there I would just look at the 
thousand dollar bills, for its not every day I get 
a peep at them. So I opened the book, but will 
you believe me sir, there was not one dollar 
there, only some blank paper rolled up to-make 
the hook look large.” 
THE LESSON OF THE WATEK-MILL, 
Mrs. K., after expressing her love for the 
young children, added, tenderly, “And how do 
you like babies, Mr. Lamb?” His answer, imme¬ 
diate, alfnost precipitate was, “ Boi-boi-boiled, 
madam.” 
Mrs. Chxbbles has great ideas of her hus¬ 
band's military powers. “ For two years,” says 
she, “ he was a lieutenant in the horse-marines, 
after which he was promoted to the captaincy 
of a regular squad of sapheads and minors.” 
A subscriber to the Manitowoc Pilot stopped 
his paper, but soon after sent the following note 
to the publisher: 
“Dear Sir: —I received a severe curtain lec¬ 
ture for stopping the Pilot. Please continue 
sending it, and oblige, Yours truly.” 
“ Sir,” said an indignant husband to his reck¬ 
less friend, “you have abused my hospitality, 
you have kicked me dowu stairs, and you have 
kissed my wife before my face. Beware, sir! A 
few more &ueh outrages, and, by Jove, you’ll 
rouse the British lion! ” 
At an evening party, Foote, the humorist, 
was reminded by tfie master of the house that 
his handkerchief was hanging out from his coat 
pocket. “ 1 thank you, sir,” Raid the humorist, 
as he thrust the embroidered cambric out of 
sight, “you know the company better than I do,” 
A genius living in California made a nerve 
and bone all-healing salve, and thought he would 
experiment a little with it. He first cut off his 
dogs’s tail and applied some of the salve to the 
stum]). A new tail grew out immediately. He 
then applied somd to the piece of tail which he 
cut off, and a new dog grew ont. He did not 
know which dog was which. 
Listen to tbe water-mill 
Through the live-long day. 
How the clicking of its wheel 
Wears the hoars away. 
Languidly the autumn wind 
Stirs the greenwood leaves; 
Fmm the field the reapers sing, 
Binding up their sheaves. 
And a proverb haunts my mind 
As a spell is cast— 
“ Tlie mill cannot grind 
With the water that is past." 
Autumn winds revive no more 
Leaves that once are shed: 
And the sickle cannot reap 
torn once gathered. 
And the rutiled stream flows on, 
Tranquil, deep, and still, 
Never gliding back again 
To the water-mill. 
Truly speaks the proverb old, 
With a meaning vast— 
“The mill cannot grind 
With the water that is past.” 
Take tbe lesson to thyself. 
Loving heart, and true! 
Golden years are fleeting by, 
Youth is passing too. 
Learn to make the most of life, 
Lose no happy day; 
Time will never bring thee back 
Chances thrown away. 
Leave no tender word unsaid, 
Love while love shall last— 
“Tbe mill cannot grind 
With the water that is past.” 
Work w hile the daylight shines, 
Man of st rength and will! 
Never does the streamlet glide 
Useless by the mill. 
Wait not till to-morrow’s sun 
Beams upon thy way; 
All that thou cun'st call thine owrn 
Lives in thy “to-day.” 
Power, and intellect, and health 
May not always last— 
“ The mill cannot grind 
With the water that is past." 
Oh. the wasted boors of life 
That have difted by 1 
Oh, the good that might have been , 
Lost without a sigh! 
Love that we might once have saved 
By a single word; 
Thoughts conceived, hut never penned 
Perishing unheard. 
Take the proverb to thine heart, 
Take, and hold it fast— 
“ The mill cannot, grind 
With the water that is past.” 
AN OLD STORY. 
Manv years ago a celebrated Italian artist was 
walking along the streets of his native city, per¬ 
plexed and desponding in consequence of some 
irritating circumstance or misfortune, when he 
beheld a little boy of such surprising and sur¬ 
passing beauty that be forgot bis own trouble 
and gloom in looking upon tbe almost angel 
face before him. 
“ That face 1 must have,” said the artist, “ for 
my studio. Will yon come to my room and sit 
for a picture, my little man ?” 
The little boy was glad to go and see the pic¬ 
tures, and pencils, and curious things in the 
artist’s room ; and he was still more pleased 
when he saw what seemed to be another boy 
looking just like himself smiling from the art¬ 
ist’s canvas. 
The artist- took a great deal of pleasure in 
looking at that sweet, innocent face. "When he 
was troubled, or irritated, or perplexed, be lifted 
his eyes to that lovely image on the wall, and 
its beautiful, hopeful features and expression 
calmed his heart and made him happy again. 
Many a visitor to his studio wished to purchase 
that lovely face; but, though poor, and often 
in want of money to buy food and clothes, he 
would not sell his good angel, as he called this 
portrait. 
So the years went on. Oftentimes as he look¬ 
ed up to the face on the glowing canvas he 
wondered what- had become of that boy. 
“ How I should like to see how he looks now! 
I wonder if I should kuow him ? Is he a good 
man and true, or wicked and abandoned? Or 
has he died and gone, to a better land ?” 
One day the artist was strolling clown one of 
the fine walks of the city, when he beheld a 
young man whose face and mien were so vicious, 
so depraved, so almost fiend-like, that he invol¬ 
untarily stopped and gazed at him. 
“ What a spectacle ! I should like to paint 
that figure, and ha g it in my studio opposite 
the angel-boy,” said tlie artist to himself. 4 
The young max. .i ked the painter for money, 
for he was a beggar as well as a thief. 
“Come to my room and let me paint your 
portrait and I will give all you ask,” said the 
artist. 
The young man followed the painter, and sat 
for a sketch. WTu^j it was finished, aud he had 
received a few coins for his trouble, he turned 
to go; but his eye rested upon the picture of 
the boy; he looked at it, turned pale, and then 
buret into tears. 
“ W’hat troubles you, man ?” said the painter. 
It was long before the young man could speak; 
he sobbed aloud, and seemed pierced with agony. 
At last he pointed up to the picture on the wall, 
and, in broken tones which seemed to come 
from a broken heart, said: 
“ Twenty years ago you asked me to come tip 
here aud sit for a picture, and that augel-laec is 
the portrait. Behold me now, a ruind man; so 
bloated, so bideons. that women and children 
turn away their faces from me; so fiend-like 
that you wanted my picture to show Low ugly a 
man could look. Ah ! I see now what vice and 
crime have done for me. 1 
The artist was amazed 
ILLUSTRATED EEBUS. 
^ennP'Ad &' IRE 
Answer in two weeks, 
For Moore's Rural New-Yorker, 
GEOGRAPHICAL ENIGMA. 
lvnt v'f Mysteries < ’ Kce-Keej-lng 
tuincy on Soiling Caitle. 
Rabbit Fancier . 20 
Randall'* Fine Wool Husbandry.. 1,00 
Randall'* $Le«p Husbandry in the South ... 1,50 
Klc.hnrdwjn on thi-flag..... 30 
Riven*' Orchard House * . 50 
Rivers' Minatnre fruit Garden.1,00 
Rogers' Scientific Aexleulture.1,00 
Rural Homes (tVlieeler). 1,50 
Saunders ou Poultry tllluvtrfttedj. 40 
Sdienek s Gardener* Text-Book. .. 75 
Scribner's Ptodnc <• Tables. so 
ScnbDi-r'i* Ready Kcrkncir and Log Rook. St) 
Silver's new poultrv Book lVO illuitrations). :*) 
Stewart’s (John) Stable Hook. 1,50 
The American House Carpenter (H&Uleld's).8,50 
The Ham Yard, a Manna!. 1,00 
The Boston Machinist .Fluperald i. 75 
The Farm, with IllustratiOLS.. 1,00 
The Fruits and Fruit Trees of America (Downing).. S,00 
Tbe Garden, i Manual .. 1,00 
The House w.l ti Original Plan -.....1,50 
The Farmer's Journal and Account Rook. 3,50 
Thomas' Via. fruit Cultorlft, k-0 Illustrations.!.... 3,00 
Thomas'Farm Implementsi. 1,50 
Tcd Acres Enough.1,50 
Todd's Vourii r urmers Manual and Work Shop,. .. 1,50 
Ventilation u American Iowc121i.es. 1,50 
Warder’s Htdcr* and Evergreens'.. 1,50 
Wax Flowers, how to make them,..,.,. 1,50 
Woodward's (irapcTicsuDd Horticultural Buildings. l, r >0 
Woodward's Country Homes. 1,50 
Woodward's Rural Architecture. 1.00 
Wool Grower 4: Stock Register, Veils. t,2, 5, 9, each.. 33 
Young Uotuekwper'* and Hairy Maid's Directory... 30 
Yonmun's Hand Rook Household Science.2.00 
YouroiuF-New Chemistry. 2,o0 
EP-Anyofthe above named work* will be forward¬ 
ed by mall, post-p.Md, on receipt of the price jpectfled. 
Addr<>. D. D. T. MOOKE, Hot lu ster, V. Y. 
I am composed of 87 letters. 
My 23, 35, 8,1, 34, 2 it an isthmus. 
My 13,10, 33, 2G, 9, 25, 35 is one of the United States. 
My 32, 4, 9, 38, 87, 7,19 is a river in California, 
My 12, 80, 20, 29 is a lake In North America. 
My 15, Hi, 24, 35, 25,14.16, 35, 25 is a range of moun¬ 
tains in Asia. 
My 31, 37, 24, 31 is one of the United States. 
My 18, 81, 30, 3 , 31,39, 26,11, 81 is one of the West 
Indies. 
My 21, 22, 5, C, 37,13, 27 is a city in Tennessee. 
My 30, 37, 9, 23,17,14 is a river in Connecticut. 
My whole is one of Dr. Franklin's maxims. 
Timber Hun, Ohio. M. Smith. 
Answer in two weeks. 
Written for MooreTtural New-Yorker 
Moore— Why, how arc you, neighbor West, 
and when did you return from New York ? 
Wed— Good evening Mr. Moorf., walk in, 
glad;to sec you, take a chair. Well sir, I got- 
home’yestciday, safe and sound. 
M. —How did you find the markets, as well us 
all of your friends? 
TF—Well sir,! found butter and cheese ex¬ 
tremely low, and that made me feel so dnll that 
I did not muke any inquiry about fruit or pro¬ 
duce. 
M. — I suppose you saw many interesting 
sights during your visit. 
IF — Yes sir; the fact is there is so much to 
see that a mau forgets what he has seen, and 
you know that a stranger don’t always know 
where to go to see tbe most interesting objects. 
AT.— That has always been rny difficulty when 
I went to Now York, I did not know where to 
go, and my friends were so busy that they could 
not go with me, consequently I net er enjoyed 
myself. 
TF. — That’s so, friend Moore, and there is 
another difficulty in a countryman going to the 
city, the confounded sharpers that are always 
loafing around to swindle everybody they can, 
making believe they are so very kind to show 
you all around and then rob you. 
M. —Yes. That just reminds me of a story I 
heard of an adventure that you met with ; do 
t ell me about it, for I confess 1 cannot under¬ 
stand it. 
IV .—A story you heard about me ? Guess not. 
What do you mean ? 
M. _ Why, something about your buying a 
pocket book. 
TF—Well, if that don’t beat the nation : how 
under the sun did that get out ? 
M. — I don’t know, indeed; but it did seem 
curious that a man of your shrewdness could 
have been so deceived. 
TF— Well, yon see Mr. Moore, I don’t like to 
say much about that adventure, for some folks 
would say that I was green to be fooled so com¬ 
pletely. What bothers me the most is to know 
who told about it. 
M.— Never f miud about that—give us the true 
version. 
TF —Well, you 6ee neighbor Moore it is not 
always advisable to tell the truth, particularly 
when the truth concerns only yourself; hut I 
guess I will tell you all about it You see, ODe 
day as I wu6 walking up Wijst street—that’s the 
street on the west side of the city next to the 
water, and just on the corner of Dey street, I 
felt something strike my leg, and in an instant 
a fellow picked up a pocket book just at my 
feet, and ofi be went. Well, before I had lime 
to think, a well dressed man stepped up to me 
and said, “that rnnnbas got your pocket book.” 
“ Oh no, said 1,1 guess not,” for you see I clap¬ 
ped my hand on my pocket book immediately 
and found it was safe. “ Yes he has,” said the 
man, and he insisted upon it. So thought I, he is 
an honest man and I will humor him. 1 3aid 
where did he go ? Said he, “ come with me and 
For Moore’s Rural New-Yorker. 
AN ANAGEAM. 
Ew.nh file s» enopgin udbs si ewtee, 
Dan deign el pohse het irtspi regte, 
Dna uyhot paresepr shi yjso ot mete, 
Alsa! who adrh ti si ot ide. 
West Hamburg. Ea 
Answer in two weeks. 
fi, each 
ectory. 
ANSWERS TO ENIGMAS, &c., IN No. 903. 
Answer to Illustrated RebusHope ne’er can leave 
the human heart. 
Answer to Miscellaneous Enigma: — Honor thy 
father and thy mother. 
Answer to Anagram: 
The course of evil 
Begins so slowly and from such slight source 
An infant's hand might stem the breach with clay. 
But let the stream get deeper, and philosophy, 
Aye, and religion too, shall strive in vain 
To turn the headlong current. 
We have received several solutions of the Arith¬ 
metical Problem, but have only room for the following 
from H. L. Woodworth of Huntley, El.:—Fore quar¬ 
ters, 140.39 lbs. at 3.5G16 els. per lb. Hind quarters, 
109.61 lbs. at 4.6610 cts. per lb. 
He could scarcely be¬ 
lieve bis own eyes and ears. “How did this 
happen ? ” he asked. • 
The youDg man then told him his sad and 
dreadful history; how, being an only son and 
very beautiful, his parents petted and spoiled 
him ; how be- went with bad boys, and learned 
all their bad habits and vices and came to love 
them; how, having plenty of money, he was 
enticed to wicked places till all was lost, and 
then, unable to work and ashamed to beg, he 
began to steal, was caught and imprisoned with 
the worst criminals; came out still more de¬ 
praved to commit worse crimes than before; 
how every bad deed he performed seemed to 
drive him to commit a worse one, till it seemed 
to him that he could not stop till brought to the 
gallows. 
It was a fearful tale, and brought tears into 
the artist’s eyes. He besought the young man 
to stop, offered to help him, and tried his best 
to save him. But, alas! it was too late. Disease, 
contracted by dissipation, soon prostrated the 
young man, and he died before he c-ould reform 
The painter hung his portait opposite that of 
the beautiful boy; and when visitors asked him 
why he allowed such a hideous looking face to 
be there, he told them the story, saying as he 
closed, “ Between the angel and the demon there 
is only twenty years of vice.” 
The lesson of this tale is in the tale itself. 
You who read it can tell what it is. Think of it 
often, and heed it always. 
WTE INVITE THE ATTENTION OF ALL 
11 interested, to our Unproved Thrashing Machines, 
both Steam and Jtoi'dc Prncer. Long experience in the 
business enables us to otter the very he.r of rosebinerv. 
We build all sUes of Thrashers, Portable Engines. Korse 
Powers,&c. Send for our Circulars. Write to .JONAS 
W. YEO, Robinson Machine Work", Richmond, Ind. 
MOORE S RURAL NEW-YORKER, 
TEX LAEGEST -CIBCULATIXG 
AGRICULTURAL, LITERARY AND FAMILY NEWSPAPER, 
IS PUBLISHED EVERT SATURDAY 
BY D. D. T. MOORE. ROCHESTER, N. Y. 
OR CONCENTRATED LYE! 
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cessary. 12 Pounds of excellent Hard Soap, or » Gal¬ 
lons of the very best Soft Soap, for only about 30 Cents. 
Directions on each Box. £y-For sale at &)l lung and 
Grocery Stores. 
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free to (hub Agent, for $1B; Ten, and one free,for *is, 
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piiESSTRE^ TUEBINE ^WATER WHEEL 
rrjfi The best Wheel In market, aslng 
ys lees water and selling for less 
JE than anv other first-class Wheel. 
vjcrtF Every Wheel wsrrantvd. Send 
for a descriptive Circular. Also, 
\\ ourlmprovedBrickMaclAaeand 
lVi Brick Machinery, Engir.ne and 
Boilers, Cane Mills, Portable 
xiMf ll.rr-Q' JijM Forges, and alt other machinery. 
© PEEKSKLLL MANUFACTURING 
J m COMPANY, 
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Washington’s Hair.— Among the curiosities 
to be disposed of at the Charity Fair at Union 
Square, New York, for the benefit of the Pro¬ 
tectorate for Homeless Little Girls, is a lock of 
hair of George Washington, set in a velvet and 
c arved oak frame. The following letter accom¬ 
panied the relic: 
“ Mt Dear Mrs. White I send you it the 
interest of the noble work you have in hand, a 
lock of General Washington’s hair. It is in 
wood which was grown at Monr.t Vernon. You 
may rely on both hair and wood beiug genuine. 
1 hope they may prove of some interest or value 
at your wble, and wishing every success to your 
generous efforts, I am, very sincerely yours,' 
“P. G. Washiscton.” 
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STICK." and J. G. SCHMIDT'S PATENT BUNG-CUT- 
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A CENTS AND ALL WHO WANT A 
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or THE LOST cause, a complete Southern History ot 
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mi 
W- .}■ -fe' -LX- 
