S46 
The RURAL NEW-YORKER 
July 20, 1022 
Pastoral Parson and His Country Folks 
By Rev. George B. Gilbert 
Tin: Minister Calls. —Thu Farson 
supposes n minister always calls at the 
wrong time. Generally, of course, he 
comes just at mealtime. That is the Par- 
soil’s favorite hour. He heard of a real 
minister's call the other day. He had 
never seen this family and knew nothing 
about them. He was very strict in his 
views and very dignified. Now it hap¬ 
pened that this family had a foolish hoy, 
and of course Lb is boy happened to be 
just out front and the first to he greeted 
by the minister. Put the hoy got the 
start of him. “Hello, you old turtle!” he 
shouted. 'Die woman said she never saw 
her kitchen look so bad, but the boy took 
him right into the kitchen, and what was 
on the table lint a pitcher of cider and a 
half-filled glass! Then lie got to talking 
to the family about going to church. One 
member who lived away said she went to 
i church. She told what town she lived in. 
*'And what is the name of your minis¬ 
ter V” he asked. She tohl him. “Why, is 
that your ministerV 1 know him well. 
And tie left that town six years ago.” 
A Letter. —The Parson 1ms just re¬ 
ceived a letter which certainly pleased 
him much. It wasn’t from a bishop, but 
it pleased the Parson infinitely more. It 
was signed by all the children of a one- 
room school ’way down county, about 14 
miles off (lie Lonely Road. If this letter 
wasn’t so mni'h about himself the Parson 
would dearly love to quote it entire, for 
it is certainly a beautiful letter. Many 
a good time lm\o we had down at that 
school, many an all-hot have we roasted, 
many a cup of cocoa hove we devoured. 
How many times have we darkened the 
windows and set up the old stereopticon ! 
The last time the Parson was down he 
cut five of the boys’ hair. The children 
gave the Parson some beautiful warm 
mittens for Christmas. Each year he 
plans to take down ice cream for their 
picnic. The teacher has been .so fine 
down there and always co-operated with 
the Parson and the little church. She 
leaves this year, and if may all be dif¬ 
ferent next year. 
A Rainy Trip. —The Parson has just 
gotten home from a two-day trip. This 
makes the fifth day it has poured here, 
and over three inches of water has fallcn. 
We needed rain, and everything is well 
soaked. We went up today and drove 
fence posts on the pasture hill, and they 
sank down as easy as though it was 
Spring mud. How much -the Parson en¬ 
joys these trips, eating with the people 
and staying with them over night on the 
lorielv loads. Here is a place where he 
goes out to admire the new concrete 
stable and the purebred stock. Such a 
fine garden—can’t vain too hard to go out 
and see it. Here is another place where 
the little widow woman with her three 
small children has paid the taxes—$40. 
the interest money, $50. and hired team 
labor, $2(5, all this Spring. She lias two 
acres of corn and planted seven bushels 
of potatoes. The place certainly had one 
of the finest gardens the Parson ever saw. 
This place has a motor truck, and carries 
everything to the city, from railroad ties 
to garden truck. This woman made a 
grand good thing this year selling dayj 
old goslings. She sold over 50 at 75 
cents each, and has more yet to hatch. 
She had three geese and one gander, but 
this is exceptional. Generally two geese 
is a plenty. 
Community Houses. —The Parson has 
just had a ’phone call to come to a dis¬ 
tant town and speak next Sunday night. 
To preach or speak in a church on Sun¬ 
day night? Not at all. To speak in a 
community house on Sunday night. This 
growth of the community house idea is 
one of the most interesting features of 
tlie present time around here. What its 
result will lie. especially on the churches, 
if is impossible to foresee. But if in 
small villages, people learn to play to¬ 
gether and plan community betterment 
together, it can only be a question of 
time before they have their church life 
together. We have been having a won¬ 
derful series of community socials here 
in ihe neighborhood where we live and 
around the country—wonderful in the re¬ 
sponse we have had from the people. 
Tut: Program. —The main thing at 
these socials is the program, and the 
great point to he kept in mind is—have 
something for everybody of all ages. See 
that there are games for all the children, 
not only at the beginning, hut once in so 
often all the evening. We have no jazz¬ 
ing. nor even fox trots; Virginia reel and 
square dances and waltzes. 
Refreshments. —During the Winter 
the ladies brought cake and we made 
coffee at home, keeping it warm on the 
stove. We served this in tin cups, pass¬ 
ing around the cups and then pouring the 
coffee from pitchers. We had cocoa, too, 
and more took this than coffee. When 
hot weather came they did not seem to 
care so much for cake, and it was too hot 
for coffee, so we just have ice even in and 
sometimes soda. Singing is a great thing 
to have, and all enjoy it. especially the 
older ones. This is really their part of 
the program. One night we had a special 
leader come out from town. We bought 
some song books for 15 cents each. There 
are quite a number of hymns in this hook 
which we also sing. Always give the 
people a chance to choose any they want. 
One night we had a violinist and a 
pianist from the city; neither of these 
cost anything but transportation. Both 
give lessons to pupils from this section. 
One other night we had a group of young 
people come to give a play they were 
giving itt their own town, We got over 
$18 that night, and gave them half of it. 
After such affairs we always have games 
and dancing. The Gilbert orchestra can 
furnish quite a bit of noise—Shelley with 
-the tenor banjo, George with his trumpet 
cornet, Olossie with his violin and Mrs, 
Parson at the piano. On the Fourth we 
appropriated money for fireworks. As it 
poured the night of the Fourth we had 
only about half our usual number, so had 
about half the fireworks, adjourning till 
Friday evening, when we had the rest of 
them and another party. This brought 
out a big crowd, aud we all had a fine 
time. 
Wireless Night.—O ne of the very 
best evenings we had was wireless night, 
when we had a man from the city come 
To kill a housewife at one clip would 
put one within the pale of the law, and 
thus the method lacks a lot of being fash¬ 
ionable; hut to kill her by Inches is still 
permissible, and much in vogue in alto¬ 
gether tun many farmhouses of the coun¬ 
try, in spite of the rapid progress being 
made in electrifying and motorizing the* 
homes. The illustration shows hilt one 
phase of what is simply routine treadmill 
activity for the housewife. Lamps, lamps, 
lamps; empty howls aud smoky chimneys. 
The long-lift cistern pump lucks much 
of furnishing an automatic water supply, 
ami it lias a peculiar way of being inert 
and always needing some elbow grease 
for every dipper of water received, but 
the lamps—■they need as much attention 
as a bashful lover, and if you haven’t had 
the pleasure of operating one of the 
mantle lamps, you have missed a lot of 
real life. 
out and put on a demonstration of wire¬ 
less. As he came from a firm that sold 
the apparatus there was no expense to 
us. The hoys went out in the afternoon 
and helped the man put up the wires. 
He claimed there was a good deal of 
“static” in the air that night, aud the 
machine certainly produced some of the 
most wonderful noises the Parson ever 
heard. These noises would break in at 
the most unexpected places, generally 
when songs or words were at their most 
touching point. A little talk a man gave, 
however, in Schenectady. N. Y„ was just 
as distinct as though he were sitting on 
the stage. Our little hall is right down 
in a valley, and there is an electric wire 
running right by the building, which 
made hearing more difficult. So sensitive 
is the “shorting” of the wire that Comes 
into the machine, if the operator even 
touches an insulated wire, standing on a 
dry floor, there will he nothing heard. 
On this evening we had nearly a hundred 
people present. On being questioned, the 
operator informed ns that this apparatus 
he had would cost about $250. but that 
he had made one for himself that worked 
a good deal better for $15. and he was 
willing to show any of the fellows how 
to go at it to make one. It would seem 
that this is likely to he the most mar¬ 
velous invention of our day, and its pos¬ 
sibilities seem unlimited. Perhaps this is 
where the housewife will come into her 
own. she can be doing her work about 
the house—often hard and cheerless work 
full of monotony and dullness, and lot 
the sounds of beautiful music come steal¬ 
ing through the room all day long. She 
need never wind the machine, uor touch 
it or pay anything. She hears the news 
of the day. the weather report, the exact 
time, and can shout out tho baseball 
scores to her husband mowing out the 
swamp down hack of the barn, Hitherto 
he has gotten the news from the milk 
wagon aud tardily relayed it to the house, 
hut now she gets it nil first hand. Mel¬ 
low metropolitan music tills her house 
and cheers her heart as she scrapes the 
new potatoes for dinner, while he ran 
enjoy the cawing of crows as lie pulls 
ragweed in tile potatoes. 
Pump and No Water. —The Parson 
has written about the electric pump and 
the water system from the well. Before 
this rainy season set in there was a fairly 
dry spell, and one day the pump started 
and never seemed to stop. It pumped 
and pumped and pumped, and we opened 
a faucet and out came only air. The 
well was dry. We were in a fix. We 
used water freely, as we used to with the 
hand pump, never realizing how much 
more a bathroom took. But it came up 
over the pipe that night, and we simply 
are more saving, using it about as Ave 
used to, and have had no more trouble. 
About three weeks ago our rainy season 
started in, and now the well is almost 
even with the top of the ground. 
Having and Raining. Tt certainly 
has been hard to hay and easy to rain. 
The Parson never saw the farm so well 
soaked at this time of the year. But we 
have finished the upland haying, and not 
hurt any from the weother. We have 
Of course, there are tba dishes to be 
washed a few times each day and a few 
other minor incidentals, not to mention 
a chorus of growing children. But. say. 
here’s a question; What intelligent farmer 
is there who would for one week attempt 
to conduct farm operations with equip¬ 
ment comparable to that which the aver¬ 
age housewife is largely compelled t*> get 
along with front year to year? 
But times are brightening up. The 
wedge is in. aud a new era is gradually 
opening which will lighten the burdens of 
tlie housewife. Meu cannot forever see 
their wives die before their allotted time 
without in time taking notice. The pro¬ 
gressive farmer is the one who recognizes 
the rights of the family to the use of all 
improved equipment consistent with the 
income from the farm operations. 
New York. A. n. culver. 
been careful to cut only when we were 
practically certain we could at least cock 
it up. We had two big loads out for just 
six days, and it came in bright as you 
please. We put it in big Cocks, all raked 
after and tucked in. in fine shape, and 
then ilie Parson gathered up all the grain 
and phosphate hags and old canvas he 
could find and we put these on top of 
the cocks and placed a stone or two on 
each to Keep them from blowing off. You 
would be surprised how much an old bag 
would protect a enok of hay. The barn 
will he about as full as last year, when 
we sold $50 worth. The Parson has 
never got that hay-fork yet. The high 
beams will have to be lowered to use one, 
hut carpenters say this can be done at 
little expense—modern barns are built 
without any such beams, anyway. Hay 
seems to be a good crop with us, as the 
boys are home to help gather it, and it 
finds n quick sale to the milkmen around 
about. 
Strawberries. —People seem to have 
done well with strawberries around here 
this year, and found quirk sales at 25 
cents a quart wholesale. The boys want 
to put some in right away, and will plow 
up a piece this afternoon. It ought to be 
of some advantage tn have pickers enough 
right in the family to pick the whole 
farm. 
Vacation Time. —What happy times 
these vacations are with all of us home 
together! Each time the Parson dreads 
the day when any shall go out to work 
somewhere else. Shelley graduated from 
the high school this year, and is going 
back to take a post-graduate course next 
year, putting much time in harmony and 
music. Why not go to school near home 
as long as you can still learn? 
A Year’s Difference. —One boy one 
year older is quite a difference, but when 
it comes to three boys one year older 
each it certainly makes a big difference. 
The Parson never noticed it as - much as 
this year, and especially in the case of 
Flossie, IIow lie has come on! George 
was taken very had with hay fever the 
very first day of haying. He mowed a 
piece of Timothy and Red-top. the latter 
being right in blossom. So Olossie 
stepped right in and would pitch on and 
mow awa.v like a good fellow, and didn’t 
seem to mind it at all. We. had such a 
good time haying together. We always 
leave on the lust load at night and unload 
it when if is cool in the morning, and 
avoid working in the extreme heat all we 
can. The. boys always long for a hay- 
tedder, lint realize our farm is too small 
to pay to house one the year around. 
His Bike. —Flossie has arrived at the 
“making tilings” age with a vengeance. 
He must lie about 12 now. (The poor 
Parson never knows tin* ages of his chil¬ 
dren, and how can he when they are for¬ 
ever changing?) Ho took an old bicycle 
frame and fixed a stick through where 
tlie sprocket went, a round hickory, pro¬ 
truding about six inches each side. He 
jumps and stands on this to coast. lie 
has an old baby carriage wheel in front 
for which he has hewn out hickory wash¬ 
ers. so as to hold it in place, ’(’hen he 
made a brake for it to stop it as he went 
down the walk. This brake is his especial 
pride, and he has explained its workings 
to the postman. Today he has remodeled 
it so that he can brake while going back¬ 
ward. To he sure, there has been a lot 
of litter in the shed, and the tools are 
more or less scattered about the place, 
but on the.whole he has done very well 
about picking them up. IIow he ever 
worried an old hit through that hickory 
the Parson doesn't know. After the first 
one split the Parson stopped work and 
helped him with the other. The wav he 
goes up and down, up and down on the 
walk with this thingnuinjig! A $40 bike 
would not have given him the genuine 
pleasure. How he works that brake he 
has made himself! lie has taken the 
willing Parson out and showed him the 
scratches he is making in the concrete 
with his (tireless) rim shut off so per¬ 
fectly with his own invention. The reg¬ 
ular brake lining from the Ford gives it 
a genuine and p' ls *-itispeotiou grip. As 
the Parson i ’ sees him now hurry¬ 
ing pn st the window with his invention 
toward the shed fur minor repairs or 
studied improvements. None of the tools 
are locked up or put away back there; 
they are all at his disposal, bless his 
heart, and may he always all his life 
have as good a elm nee for self expression 
as he is now having, banging and hewing 
away, all hot and dusty, out in the old 
back shed! 
Self-assertion.— Speaking of self-as¬ 
sertion and self-expression, the Parson 
has just been looking over a book right 
from the press which he has not fully 
read on the “Rural Mind and Social Wel¬ 
fare." It looks like a good hook, full of 
good thought and suggestions, The Par¬ 
son’s eye was particularly caught by the 
chapter on “Tlie Insrinet of Self-Asser¬ 
tion" in tin* eouutry. Parents who ad¬ 
vise their children to leave the country 
might well ponder this chapter of Prof. 
Groves. Herein may be found the cause 
of the ever-smouldering discontent, of the 
industrial masses from tlie days of the 
children of Israel in Egypt down. It lies 
far below a matter of wages and money 
and even homes, down in the everlasting 
yearning of men to do something distinc¬ 
tive. peculiar and worth while. Both 
with children and grown-ups was there 
ever a place like a farm for this? 
So wrrn Shelley. —And Shellev is 
having a great time with daredevil, strip¬ 
ping him down to the poise and guise of 
a racer. Old Jim has already carried off 
one load of the cast-offs—running hoards 
and fenders and windshield frames and 
top, etc. So far the Parson has ponied 
less than $5 toward the construction and 
tlie windshield glass, cut in long strips, is 
worth just about that for bathroom 
shelves. How he has done it and how 
he comes out may be a little story worth 
telling next time to the older bovs of the 
big R N.-Y. family. 
Hum’s Little Dammy. —Ta has just 
come to tell his Momnm that he has been 
making a little dammy in the brook. The 
boys were making a big dammy. and so 
he made hint's little dammy. Why not? 
While all the big ones are doing large 
tilings all the little ones stand round 
about and do little things—hut just like 
the big folks’ tiiiugs. The child students 
tell us that all our children learn eight 
times as much from imitation as from 
what they are told. So while the big ones 
make big daminys. the little ones make 
little dnmmys, and if the big dammys are 
made solid and true the little dammys 
ivill he made that way, too. 
A NEGRO couple stood once again before 
the probation officer. “Now this,” the 
officer said to hath, “seems to me to lie a 
case where there is nothing very much 
the matter except that your tastes are 
different. You, Sam, are much older than 
your wife. It is a case of May married 
to December.” A slight pause, and then 
Eva, the wife, was hoard to remark in a 
fired voice: “T—T really dnnn’ know what 
you means, by yer saying May is married 
to December. Tf yer goin’ to talk that 
way. it seems to mo to lie a case of Labor 
Day married to de Day of Rest.”— 
Everybody's Magazine. 
The Housekeeper’s Treadmill 
