thea-neotar 
nmor 
KICKED BY A MULE. 
Jake Johnson had a mule. There was 
nothing remarkable in the mere fact of Jiis 
being the possessor of such an animal, hut 
there was something peculiar about this 
mule. JI<—the animal—could kick higher, 
hit harder, on the slightest provocation, and 
act uglier than any mule on record. 
One morning, riding his property to mark¬ 
et, Jake met Jim Boggs, against whom he 
had an old, blit concealed grudge. lie knew 
Boggs’ weakness lay in bragging and bet¬ 
ting ; therefore, he saluted him accordingly .- 
“ IIow are you, Jim V Fine morningV” 
“Hearty, squire,” replied Jim. “Fine 
weather. Nice mule that you have. Will 
lie do to bet on V” 
“Bet on? Guess he will that. 1 tell you, 
Jim Boggs, lie’s the best mule in this coun¬ 
try. Paid $500 for him." 
“Great smash! Is that so?” ejaculated 
Jim. 
“Solid truth, every word of it. Tell you 
confidentially, Jim, I'm taking him down 
for betting purposes. I bet he can kick a 
fly off from any man without its hurling 
him.” 
“Now, look here, squire,” says Jim, “1 
am not a belling character, but I’ll bet you 
something on that myself." 
“Jim, there’s no use; don’t bet, I don’t 
want to win your money.” 
“ Don’t be alarmed, squire, I’ll take such 
bets as them every time.” 
“ Well, if you are determined to he!, I 
will risk a small stake—say five dollars.” 
“All right, squire, you’re my man. But 
who’ll he kick the lly' oil ? Then! is no one 
here hut, you ami I. You try it.” 
“No,” says Johnson; “I have to he by 
the mule’s head to order him.” 
“Oh! yass,” says Jim. “ Then probably 
I’m the man. “ Wa’all, I’ll do it; but you 
are to bet ten against my five, if I risk it.” 
“All right,” quoth the squire. “Now, 
there is ally on your shoulder. Stand still.” 
And Johnson adjusted the mule. 
“ Whist, Jervoy,” said lie, 
The mule raised Ids heels with such velo¬ 
city and force that Boggs rose in the air like 
a bird, and alighted on all-fours in a muddy 
ditch, bang up against a rail lencc. 
Rising, in a. towering range, he exclaimed: 
“ \ ass, that is smart! 1 knew your darned 
mule couldn’t tlo it. You had that all put 
up. I wouldn’t be kicked like that for fifty j 
dollars. You can just fork over them are ! 
stakes fi>r it any way." 
“ Not so fast, Jim ; Jervey did just wlml 1 
said lie could; that is, kick a fly off a man 
without its hurling him. You see, the mule 
is not injured by the operation. However, 
if you are not satisfied, we will Iry it ijguin 
as often ns you wish.” 
“ The deuce take yon," growled Jim. “ I’d 
rather have a barn fall on mo at, once than 
have that critter kick me again. Keep the 
slakes, but don’t, say anything about it.” 
Ami Boggs trudged on in bitterness of 
soul, murmuring to himself, “ Sold, by thun¬ 
der! and kicked by a mule!” 
COMMENCED JULY 8, 1871 
Ci.ub A ok nts, StTBSCarBERS, Postma stiohs, ami oil others interested in the Ki 
Yorker ore requested to note that a new Semi-Annual Volume commenced on the t 
and govern themselves accordingly. While we pledge our best endeavors to mainla 
tution os the Best Rural, Literary, Family and Business Newspaper extant, we r 
ask tor this Journal such aid in the way of new subscriptions as its hosts of friends cm 
the present opportune season. 
STYLE AIM) RATES OF THE R( RAI 
Volume XXIV. will be published in uniform style with the present — eneh No. 
Sixteen Double Quarto Pages of Five Cdlnnms- Finely Illustrated and Neatly Print 
Paper. A Title Page and Index given at tile close of the Volume. 
A KIND OF EARLY CORN THAT IS IN SEASON ALL THE YEAR ROUND 
AVOIR LEAH D*OISOY 
T1N-1.IVKI) LEAD I 
PE is tint only water 
(•me in t he market, whl.li coin- 
tofc. nines surety to henltti with 
strength, durnlillllr. finality of 
ti' iictmg. lino making perfectly 
L Vj ' 'got■Joints. Waieitlow * through 
■ Ron puroto* If'drawnthrough sil- 
‘R>i^P v, ' r 11 >» approved by t*ll the 
•'' JfB lending clietutslK and plivsiciuus 
■ Mr oi the eountry , also, the Water 
commissioner*, nf Now York, 
^ Brooklyn urirl Ro-tOh. In addi¬ 
tion uj tno plumbing of houses, 
used ,n conveying water tram springs 
Prion la cents a pound tor all size*. t'ir- 
mmi'ln "t |dpe soot by mall true. Ad- 
OOI.WK.LLS. SHAW & WILLARD 
Id t enter St. Now York. Also niHtiufue- 
Oek Tin Pipe. Loud Pipe, Sheet Loud. 
OfUfEKS PltOMPTI V ATTENDED TO. 
MISCELLANEOUS ENIGMA.—No. 3 
A very mil eh distinguished medieval Queen 
is ooinpreJitJiKJod here in letters seventeen; 
An eminent, ueaompliKhed politician, and 
lly writer*called Semirajuis, of Northern Land ; 
The 8, II, 17 is wlml did onee contain 
All living things oo earth, and safe preserved 
front rain; 
In I t. 5, 11, IQ and I appenrs 
Ttm style and title due to matron's years; 
13, V, L Itt and It is a downtrod race 
Hy freemen's bayonets advanced to better place. 
to. 8, l;i. H conveys no notion of content. 
Hut worriment and peevishness is rather meant. 
i Answer in two weeks. E. S. 
O O l> V ’ S 
Mireka Stamp, 
f(.f,nrd l.y iiji- 
wsid aotlou of the lover ill the machine. Price r'Ki 
J. Lb tlOHI) V. 
ON Ti t nil ( Building. 
. .. V f.O.Wwti.Y. 
ILLUSTRATED REBUS.-No. 2, 
T qoffsj II ‘ 
c iontfs WA 4 " |L 
AND 
UlIiATt IIAM i; POIl A HUNTS. 
U't Votl want an agency, loent or travellnu, with 
a chance to make to tt'tO per tiny selling 
pat new i strand ir/iifr ll'iir L'lnthr* Lines 7 
I'licii lam Jowner : Kamplo free, no there Ik no 
n k. Address nl mice llililniill llin i ll'irr 
IT nrlot, cor, Water St., and Malden Lane, N. 
i Dearborn St. Chicago, in. 
, ,... m tno i nlted .States are now using tl.e Doty Washing Machine 
and as many thousand women thank Doty for his invention, and will testify that One Washing Mad.I„e 
Is not a HIT JVX J3UCP. 
There is no mist tike about it; this machine will wash clothes well and thoroughly much luster did 
easier that, can he done by hand, and with far lcm wear to the garments. 
IT SAVES ITS COST EVERY YEAR BY SAVING CLOTHES. 
Any person who will he guided by the printed directions, which are easily understood can use tlio 
washer successfully the first trial, and will he sure to like it. understood, can use tlio 
iBfli: P4TKNT Bll.iUi: WEIGHT 
recently in venled, docs away with the nseol springe and makes the work much easier by giving a heavier 
blow with less effort. One dollar covers tlo. additional cost above the old’stylo. 
IT A I QUIT CL S'l'OMlTlCS S A a wr ittmi rm 
Answer in two weeks. 
CROSS-WORD ENIGMA-No. 2 
A of OtUiwa, Ohio. Is not in v uin homed agent IDs 
power Ilf attorney Was annulled in Alin lust All 
communications in regard to Agencies or rights In 
sell my Door and Gale Spring should ho addressed to 
tlie Inventor, K. D. NORTON, Luba, N. V, 
My first is in aunt but not in cousin, 
My second's in gross but not in dozen ; 
My third Is In rye but not in oals. 
My fourth is in ships but not in boats; 
My lift It is In canal but not in dyke, 
My sixih is in hurl but not in strike; 
My seventh is In love but not fit hate, 
My eighth is in town but. not in Stale; 
My ninth Is in dust but not in day. 
My tenth Is in river hut, not in buy; 
My eleventh is in pigeon but not in swallow, 
My whole an employment that many men 
follow. 
£3?“' Answer in two week. Eunice. 
I OF KOLlt Git AUKS 
Water-Proof CLAP-BOARDS, 
A perfect miIiMIDUo for pine, at abmii 
hull Its C"Kt, and entirely wnter-proot 
SHEATHING BOARD, 
For outside of StuddSOg. under Clap, 
hoard*. A non-conductor oi edd, hout 
and dampness. 
Prepared Plastering BOARD, 
a cheap and perfect substitute lor lath 
and plusler : makes a Smooth, sub¬ 
stantial wall, at less limn halt the 
usual cost. 
DOUBLE-THICK ROOFING, 
rondo entirely of Wool Felt, ii cheap 
and ported article. 
Sampler, and Circular* sent free, by 
ROCK ftlVKtl PAPER CO., Chicago; or 
B. 15. HALE. -2 & SI Prankf..rl si,, N Y. 
The Balance Weight improvement In D,.tv 
sons who would not buy tlie oilier si vie I ilot. 
washer, Send me live dozen in.ire tiijiucdiuinlv. 
A VERY GOOD WAY. 
In answer to a correspondent in Southern 
Illinois, who wants to know “ how to keep 
liens from setting,” a Western editor thus 
rises and explains: 
There are several very good ways. One 
plan is to make them into pot-pics about 
seventeen days before they exhibit any such 
evidence of eltickcn-lieaiTediicss. Another 
good way is to watch the lien when she 
begins that peculiar chicking, indicative of a 
desire to muirkalalr , • wash her in sweet 
milk, put mustard poultices on her leet, and 
Jiang her up by the neck in a dark clothcs- 
press for ninety-three or ninety-four hours. 
Should the demoralised biddy be cut down 
before the time, for setting slit; will probably 
set out for some other locality. Another 
good way would be to road the riot act, 
when, if they will not disperse, wallon them 
GEOGRAPHICAL ENIGMA.—No. 2 
I am composed of 34 letters. 
My l, 3, io, is, 13 js one of the United Stales. 
My Li, 33. IK. 33,15, 34, 19, 13, 4 is one of the Uni 
ted Slates. 
My 3, ii. 13 Is a river In Europe, 
M.v 7, 15, 33, 31, 10,13,10 is a river In Asia. 
My K, 9, 31, 13, 4 ts a river in I lie United States. 
My 5, 17,11, II is a city in the British Isles. 
My 13, 30, 4. 10, 34, 19 is a river in Austria. 
My 33, 3J, 14, (I, 17 Is one of the Sandwich Isles. 
My whole is one of Franklin’s Proverbs. 
£j tT Answer In two weeks. L. W. C. 
AI’I’Mt I*AU Ell, COItKIt AMI SLU ICE. 
t\ Price #2. Dock all ut once, Warranted .satis¬ 
factory. D. H. WiltTTK.MOKE’, Woici:»Lill, Muss. 
■ ■ T 'NTF.n AGENTS. (SHI orr tololl 
■ ■ Ml.,.III,! licit 11 ( <M K Si IITTI ,K SI :w I\,i 
■ I MACH IN I Hio* the innhr-Jccii, makes tlio 
■ l| ‘7wl'-tf(W (alike on both sl.lt'M and is 
■ ■ .toll\i tieeusul The best mid cheapest filially 
■ ■ Sewing Machine .ii tlio tnnikci. Address 
I H JOHNSON, CLARK A GO,, Huston, Mass,, 
| 0 Pittshurg, J'a„ OhlciiKo. 1II..OI St. Louts. Mn. 
PROBLEM. No. 3 
Two plane mirrors standing upright io aroora 
and their faces tnelined towards each other at 
an angle of 15*, have an object bowteen them* 
IIow many images will lie formed in the glass? 
IksT" Answer next weeks. S. G. 0, 
G IlKAI' KOl THEltN FARMS, \mili 
V' <'a col t nn ( Iil.n y forming under auspices cl 
National Migration Bureau, of which Mon Horace 
Greeley Is President. Sena .stump tor Circulars. 
Cctuinbian Southern Limil Agency,:;! Park Row N.Y, 
PUZZLER ANSWERS 
Word-Square Enigma No. t 
On receipt of One Dollar I will send a process for 
nnikiiig a compound which is u m i l.) hi k (thei.mii 
an IITA1N l-KKVI NTIVK of both lion (Tlul.E'RA and 
1 Hie li ISA. Fed regularly in stun II doses 11 kn n.*- boas 
absolute-in f ree fi om nil illsease. 
Also, on receipt of Due Dollar 1 will send recipe 
lor making an affect tin I cure aim infali.IB1.io i*kk 
VENT lvioot Hen Cholera and all diseusesln l.mis or 
tnrlioys. The above compounds me not worthies* 
mixtures,but sen nUtU: mulpourrlul JCnglfsh remedies, 
ih n it /mm 11 if i ibi i mi a 1 1 ji, v cr.v reliable, and in eo it li¬ 
able to the American Farmer. The oust is ti ming. 
Address II. A. HA It N EX, 
Lock Box 344. Davenport, Iowa. 
'po DAIRYMEN AND FARWERS.- 
Jl Slate Dairy Shelves nn.I Kneading Itoarils. No 
Dairy should be without Slate Shelves. For c..ol- 
iicsh Cleanliness and durability, they fur exceed 
wood. Cut to any sixe or shape. 
Slate K Heading Hon ids. a most desirable 
in tide lor mixing bread and pastry. Address 
EAGLE SLAT I*. Co., 
_ ItydevHl*, Vt. 
N K 8 T. 
I’UZZI.E No. 1.—Each woman sold tier eggs at the 
I'lltC of seven tor a cent, and three omits each for the 
odd number. Each received ten cents. 
.Mi$Cki.i,aN gotrg Enigma No. I.-Coldwater. 
H-i.trsTHATEi) IlKBCS No. l.-A stern arid villain- 
(lUM.Iooking personage demanded my money or my 
Ule. • 
GKoc.UA PIIICAI. ENIGMA No. 1.—Never show your 
teeth unless you curl bite. 
Problem No. 1.—Tho following are the first live 
answers received 
I feet, mi 2 li;ill inches from large end. 
II foot*, o.'KOIill Inches from small end. 
u. feet. U.999!t!i Inches. 
The exact answer cannot he given. I have carried 
itt.* live decimal places, but Ii would run into Pe¬ 
riodical decimal*, so that we can only approxi¬ 
mate Die true distance from either end.—8. \V 
Mason, Westlleld, N V. 
From William it. Watbuman. Albion, N. Y.:- 
II feet, ,1.7.117)24 Inetie* from one end ; 4 feet.S 2;k73ti4 
Inches from the other end. 
I rom A. P. BOYIKII, Elmira, N. Y.s—1J ,8137 feet 
lrum the pointed end. 
From Frank Taggart, Newfleld, N. Y.:-U :i]37x 
feet from pointed end. 
From II. II. RUSSELL, York, N. Y.: The b mrd 
must he cut 4.H8-1VU feet from one end und 11.22-100 
feet from the other. 
GltEUN TEA FLAVOR 
^Wnrmnted to Knit all Tastes. 
rOR SALE EVERYWHERE. 
Arid for sale Wholesale only l.y the 
r ri!K PATENT A KJON PIANO-FORTE 
A is c'inetructud upon new and seiontlfla iirim.'i- 
nles. and Is acknowledged l.y all who have examined 
It to he nil ahsfilutrlii perfect plane,' upon upplicallon 
we will mill), J iti"i*: to any address, n fi(J-|e.ge tllus- 
* ''al ed pamphlet, Hilly describing tlip great improve¬ 
ments used In “Tin* Arlon." Do not purchase a 
pulno until you have read ibis pamphlet. Special 
rates I., teachers; marked favors to clergymen. 
YVrli <9 for pnntphlet, and state « here von saw ibis 
notice. Address TDK ARlON PIANO-FOKTKCOM¬ 
PANY. NO. 5A*1 H road way, N. Y.City. 
TOMMY AND TABBY TALK. 
If a cat doth meet a cat on a garden wall, 
and if a cat doth greet a cat, oh, why need 
they both squall? Every Tommy has his 
Tabby waiting on tliewall, and yet lie wel¬ 
comes her approach by an unearthly yawl. 
And il a kitten wish to court upon Hie gar¬ 
den wall, why don’t lie sit and sweetly smile, 
and not stand up and bawl, and lift his pre¬ 
cious back up high, and show his teeth and 
moan, as if ’twere colic more than love, that 
made that fellow groan. 
■--- 
Joslt BrLLiNos says lie never will patron¬ 
ize a lottery so long as lie can find any ono 
else to rob him at reasonable wages. 
GETTING UP CLUBS. 
GREAT SAVING TO CONSUMERS 
Parlies Inquire how t.. got up clubs. Our answer 
Is. send fur Price 1,1st, and a Club form will accom¬ 
pany It with full directions,- making a large saving 
to consumers and remunerative to Club organisers. 
Kmertion’s Itl5 A II SHOT 
rtouovcK all kinds of Worms 
from HORS KBaud CATTLE 
First Premium and rnplona 
at American Institute 
18(19 and 1MII, for MAl'KXf 
unit BfCXT ILLUMINATING 
OIL. Oil House of v 
< H AS, PICVTT. N. ' • 
Kr»tubli*ln'<l 1770. 
Trade mar* 
