ttmor 
THE LUCKY CALL, 
A cotot nr curate, visiting hie flock, 
At old Rebecca's cottage gave u knock. 
“ Good morrow. Game—I mean not any libel. 
But in your dwelling have you got a Bible?” 
“ A Bible, sir,” exclaimed Bhe In a rage, 
“ I)’ ye think I've turned a Pagan in my age? 
Here, Judith, haste and run up stairs, my dear, 
’Tis in the drawer, be quick and bring in hero.” 
'i'lie girl return’d with Bible In a minute. 
Not dreaming for moment what was In It; 
When, to 1 on opening it at parlor door, 
Down tell her spectacles upon the floor. 
A max'd she star’d, was for a moment dumb. 
But quick exclaimed, "Ob, elr, I’m glad you’re 
come; 
’TIb six yearn since these glasses tlrxt were lost, 
And I have missed ’em to my poor eyes’ cost.” 
Then ns the glasses to her nose she rais’d. 
She closed the Bible, saying, " God be praised!” 
i*TURE 
A CHANGE A>1> IMPROTEMENT! 
Two Volumes a Year Instead of One! 
AMONG THE FREEDMEN, 
Extracts from the Missionary Girl’s Letters 
to Mintwooil. 
One of my night scholars has not yet 
“ dun larnt” Ills a, b, c’s. A Itig, strong fel¬ 
low, lie finds it “ a heap harder than plow¬ 
ing.” He will never own that lie does not 
know a letter. 
“ I’se had dat are in my maul sure , only 
jest couldn’t, speak it;” or, “Well, dat am 
him, sure null*. I krwmd him, hut he’s so 
funny one—couldn’t see him 1” 
He had hunted all over the page, with 
many a long slgli, when I pointed to it. 
“ Oh Lordy, yes, dat’s F; didn’t s’pos eclat 
de feller you’s talking about!” 
Hens In the Hcliool-Uooni. 
Oun new school-room Is a small house, in 
the (negro) “quarters” on the plantation 
where I board. There are no sashes iu the 
windows, so I have to leave them ( i . e., the 
shutters,) open for light, and detail two or 
three Topseys to stand guard and keep out 
the hens, which were accustomed to “ equal 
rights” with the former occupants. Some¬ 
times, in spite of “shoo! shoo-ing,” they 
“ force a passage.” Toi-skv says, “ Ah, ha| 
3 ’ou’sgotin, lias yer?” then a chase under 
and over loose benches; finale, a loud 
squawking. 
“ Yes siree ! I’se got yerl” and the bird is 
ejected, minus sundry tail feathers. What 
a blessed tiling is a good laugh! 
Hiduey’x Wlfe’x Fortune. 
Mu. 0. says he met a former slave of his 
father’s in Charleston lately, and accosted 
him“ Well, (Sidney, going to gel married 
are you?” 
“ Yes, sir, think I’ll try wedded life now." 
“ Has your lady any property V” 
“ Well, yes, sir; got a little fortune; put 
it witli mine (he hadn’t a cent!) and reckon 
we’ll got along very comfortable.” 
“ What lias she got, Sidney ?" 
“ She’s got a house; small one—four rooms 
in it.” 
“ Is it all hers ?” 
“Well, no sir, not’zactly; it belongs to 
the family. She has got only four sisters 
and two brothers." 
Mr. C. also tells a funny story about 
Jonex. 
Some years before the war Mr. C.’s father 
commanded on hoard a steamer. One night, 
when he came on board at the time for start¬ 
ing, he found everything iu darkness—not a 
single lamp lighted. He called all over the 
boat for Jones, the colored man whose busi¬ 
ness it was to light, up, but got no answer. 
At last, on going to the hatchway and look¬ 
ing down, he saw Jones seated on the floor, 
drunk, lie had the lanterns all around him, 
trying to light them without removing the 
glass, and was talking to them. 
“ Better light, better light, 1 tell yer 1 
Don’t yer hear de eapt’n calling yer ? Bet¬ 
ter light, T tell yer 1 Drunk, liey ? Nebbcr 
mind, capl’n fix you ; lam you to get drunk 1” 
It was too much for the captain’s gravity, 
and old Jones got off easy that time. 
The Founder and Conductor of the Ron ad New-Yorker takes pleasure in announcing that it 
will hereafter be issued in Semi-Annual Volumes, commencing July and January. This change 
must he gratifying to the thousands who preserve and bind the paper for future reference, as the 
volumes wifi be leas bulky and more conveniently handled and perused. On binding Volume XX., 
for 1869, (containing double the number of pages given in any preceding volume,) we found it too 
large for convenience, and honce decided upon the change now announced—a change which it is 
believed will materially enhance the Usefulness and Acceptability of 
“ Over the left; its three pence too high 
now.” 
“ No doubt of it; but our neighbors, you 
know, on the left, are not manufacturers, 
you know.” 
“ Very likely, but I don’t care to be ‘ stuck’ 
when I get home.” 
“ Keally—most extraordinary. Is it as 
dangerous in New York as the newspapers 
say ? " 
“ Yes, but I don*t want these goods. I’ve 
got some already tlmt will ‘ knock the spots 
out of ’em.’ ” 
“ But, my dear, “ there’s no spots on the 
goods, I assure you. They arc perfect.” 
“ Weil, well; suppose we ‘switch off’ on 
these goods and try something else." 
“Certainly!” and the Englishman, to the 
infinite amusomentof the American’s friends, 
called a clerk with a wisp-broom and di¬ 
rected him to “ switch off” any dust he could 
find, while he proceeded to show something 
else. 
“ There," said the Englishman, triumph¬ 
antly spreading out another fabric. “ There’s 
tliq'ftiulsomest piece of goods iu England— 
’art a guinea a yard.” 
“1 can’t see it I” said his customer. 
“Can’t see it! Why you are looking 
right straight at it. However, suppose you 
try Uie light of this window. 
“ No, I don’t mean that,” said the Ameri¬ 
can. “ 1 haven’t got the stamps for such 
goods.” 
“ Stamps 1 No stamps required but a bill 
stamp, which we are happy to furnish." 
This misunderstanding might have con¬ 
tinued longer, had not one of the younger 
members of the house, seeing his senior’s 
perplexity, rescued the “Yank,” and “put 
him through” after the manner of his coun¬ 
trymen. 
THE STANDARD JOURNAL IN ITS SPHERE 
In accordance with this new arrangement we shall give a Title Page and Index at the close of 
this month, and commence Vol. XXII. with July, thus publishing two volumes a year, Instead of 
one as heretofore. Subscribers who preservo the Rural, can therefore have their copies bound 
as soon as the last Juno number is issued, or wait until the close of the year and hind the two 
volumes together—adopting either course, according to their pleasure or requirements. 
Ocr Terms will continue the same as now—13 a year, or $1.60 for six months (or per volume)— 
so that the interests of present subscribers will be promoted rather than injured by the change; 
for they can bind each volume separately, or two in one, at pleasure. A complete Index at the 
close of every six months will prove a great convenience and advantage to all who save their 
papers for reference, even if they are not bound. 
ACKKTOWLEDGIVIENTS —- ADVANCEMENT. 
In this connection we cannot refrain from gratefully acknowledging the long-continued, 
substantial efforts of the Hural’h hosts of ardent friends and supporters, all over the land,-those 
who have for years aided us in every appropriate manner, and enabled us to Increasingly manifest, 
through the Contents, Styi.p. and Size of this Journal, the true spirit of its Motto, “ KmMor,” 
and Objects, “ Prepress and Improvement." These long-time, generous and influential friends, as 
well ns the more recent hut like zealous ones who arc kindly seconding our efforts to render the 
Rural New-Yorker the Best, Most Complete and Widely Useful Journal of its (’lass iu the 
World, are assured that we design to improve as we advance, rendering ful lire volumes still more 
Valuable and Acceptable to the intelligent and progressive members of the great Producing and 
Industrial Classes of the Nation. While we pledge our beat endeavors to excel past efforts—tlmt 
Tact, Industry, Enterprise, Liberality, and the Best Talent, shall be freely used to secure con¬ 
tinuous improvements we respectfully ask the kind co-operation of the Rural’s legion of friends 
in extending its Circulation and thus widening Ids Influence and Usefulness. 
Emma Chandler writes: — “Looking over 
some old Kitkals which I round at a friends, I 
came across the inclosed “ Rebus,” and as I have 
puzzled my brain several times until ray head 
ached, trying to read it, I send it to you with a 
request that you republish It and see if any of 
your readers will translate it." 
SSsF Answer in two weeks. 
MISCELLANEOUS ENIGMA—No. 18 
I am composed of twenty-six letters. 
My 8,10, 88, 15, 7,24 is a county in New York. 
My 9,15, 7,18, 12 is a liguro of rhetoric. 
My 3,15,13,14, 2 is a kind of fish. 
My 18,13, 8,18 is a part of Speech. 
My 11,10, 8, 9,10,13, 34,20 is a parlor game. 
My 17, 21 ,21,2, 7,10 is the name .of a noted pe¬ 
destrian. 
My 11,9, 00,10 means same. 
My 2,15,13, 6 is a city in Eastern New York. 
My 17,32,1, 4, If'. should all strive to gain. 
My 19,15,13,17,23 p. a color. 
My 5, 7, 30 is a personal pronoun. 
My 0, 8, 34, 27, 9,20 Is a figure of etomology. 
My 17,24,35, 3 is one of the cardinal poinlsof the 
compass. 
My 4, 15, 5, 4,84,18 is the name of a modern 
writer. 
My 0, 24,10 is a number. 
My whole is good advice to all. N. E. l>. 
1ST Answer in two weeks. 
RATES PER VOLUME AND NEAR. 
Volume XXII., commencing July 2d, will be published in uniform style wiIh the present- 
each No. containing Sixteen Double Quarto Pages of Five Columns-Finely Illustrated and Neatly 
Printed on Book Paper. A Title Page and Index given at, the close of the Volume. 
Terms— Only $1*50 per Volume of numbers, (July to Jan.,) or $3 per year of 52 num¬ 
bers. Ten copies, *1.85 each per volume, or *'2 rf 50 per year, with a tree copy (or premium) to club 
agent. Clubs of Five, Sovcu, Ten or more may be made up for either Uie Volume or Year—the 
former at half the rates of the latter. Remittances by Draft, P. O. Money Order, or Registered 
Letter, may be made at the risk of the Publisher. 
fSY” Now I* the Time to Subscribe and Form Clubs! Friends of the Rural, 
please tell i/ottr friends of our new arrangement, and make up Clubs for Vol. XXII. Specimen 
Numbers, Show-Bills, &c., sent free to all disposed to lend influence In support of the Rural. 
Address D. D. T. HIOOKE, 41 Park Row, New York. 
CLINGING TO A CRAW-HORSE 
BIBLICAL ENIGMA,—No. 9, 
1 ) O It T ABLE STATION A It V 
■*- AND 
AGRICULTURAL 
STEAM! 333XTGrIIXrES. 
Equaled by none in Combined DleritH of Ca¬ 
pacity, Economy, Durability, 8iiu- 
plleliy nml Perfection. 
OurPORTABLE ENGINE,mounted on Locomo¬ 
tive Boiler, having tire-box and ash-pit entlroly sur¬ 
rounded l.v water space, i» set Upon legs and tim¬ 
bers ; occupies little room : needs no brick work; is 
suitable (or use in any place where a power Is re¬ 
quired in Mills, Shops, /.Vorndrii'.i.or PrlnniiyJtOOms, 
or In Stock Hums, for grinding, cutting and steam¬ 
ing food for stock. 
Thu STATIONARY ENGINE is complete, with 
Oovirnor Pomp and f Icnt.-r, with Connections tltterl. 
The AGRICULTURAL KNGINK. supplied with 
Locomotive Holler, Is mounted on wheels, with pole 
lor attaching horses tor moving from place to place ; 
is suitable for Grata Threshing, Corn Shelling, flood 
and Shingle Sawing, &c. 
Circulars, with description and prices, furnished 
on application to 
1WOOD, TA1JEII & MORSE, 
Eaton, Madison Co., N. Y. 
WALTHAM WATCHES 
A WRITER in thu Chicago Advance says: 
“Not so long since, I heard sung in the 
church the anthem ‘ Rock of Ages,’ in which 
are the words, * Should my tears,’ which was 
sung as follows: 
* Shoo-hoo-hood my-lii-to-hears 
For eh-ver-licr tlow-ho, 
Shoo-hoo-hood tuy hi-ze heal 
No langour kno ho, 
Thi-his for her-si-hin could 
No hot ah-ha-to-hone, 
Tliou-how uiuh-huHt sa-havo, 
And tbnu-imw uh-ha-lone, 
In my hand no price I bring, 
Simply to thy craw-horse I-hl cling.’ ” 
I am composed of twenty-five tetters. 
My 1, 21,19, li was an ancient man. 
My 3, 18,18, 5 was an ancient dwelling. 
My 11, 7, 8. 20 was an ancient woman. 
My 15,4,12,11 was an ancient metal. 
My 17, 10, 24,11 was a musical instrument. 
My 22, J6, 2, 3 was an ancient animal. 
Mv 25, 23, 9. 8 was an anoient bird. 
My whole is a Bible command. Isola, 
82^“ Answer in two weeks. 
You can open the package and 
examine the watch before paying. 
We send Genuine Waltham Watches with this priv¬ 
ilege. bv Ex press, to any part of the country, with 
the bill to collect nn delivery. Solid Silver Hunting 
Watches at (18; Gold H )\ audit s, $70 Lvi<u 
Watch warranted by special ccrflrtcap. Send for our 
Descriptive lb-ice Lint, which explains t he different 
kinds, and glvo weight and quality til ins cases, 
with prices of each. Write for it as follows : 
Messrs. HOWARD .V OO.. No. 785 Broadway, N, V.: 
Please send me vour Illustrated Price List of WA L- 
TH AAl WATCHES, ns per Advertisement la Moore s 
Rural New-Youkkii. 
Sio.v Name and Address K Full, 
And you will receive it, post-paid, by return mail. 
It gives all the information you desire, and explains 
our plan of Bending Watches by Express without uny 
risk to the purchaser. 
HOWARD 6c CO., 
785 Broadway, New York. 
Formerly No. 019 Broadway. 
PROBLEM No. 15 
One hundred rods of fence incloses a right- 
angled triangular field of grass. The tether that 
will permit a horse to graze in its greatest circle 
will allow him to consume the feed that grows 
upon just OUC-hulf of it. Required the sides of 
the field. B. F. Burleson, 
Stookbridgc, N. Y. 
Answer In two weolcs. 
GLIMPSES OF GENIUS, 
When tt cat sings does she do it on pur-puss? 
High-Toned Men—T he tenor singers. 
A Portland club lias the following question 
proposed for discussion:—“ Cun u big man ache 
harder than a little man ?" 
A DOCTOR hoosttng at dinner that he cured his 
own hams, one of liia guests remarked, “ Well, 
Doc., 1 would sooner be your hum titan your 
p&lient.” 
A smart boy of Bellefontain©, after enting a 
green apple, exclaimed, “ Oh. dear I I’ve chewed 
an Odd Fellow.” “An Odd Fellow!” said his 
mother. “ Yos; he's giving me the grip.” 
A Devonshire man, when on his death-bed, 
the other day, begged his wife and children to 
have the funeral procession start early, so that 
they might be sure and get home by milking 
time. 
“I say, ma," exclaimed a little minx of thir¬ 
teen, "do you know whnt the pyrotechnical 
remedy is for a crying ’infant?’ “(imelons 
goodness me, no; I never heard of such a thing |” 
" Well, nut, it's a rocket,” 
A piously inclined person was exhorting Pat 
on the subject Of religion. He imlSgmmllv un- 
svrored, “Bure, and didn't I Jine the Methodists? 
Faix an’ I did. I lined for six months, uud bo- 
CHARADE.-No. 12, 
My first is an interjection, as you will see; 
My second's the same, you will agree; 
M.v third, also, with interjections rates; 
My whole is one of the Western States. 
82©'“ Answer in two wooks. Franz, 
KNITTING 
E ly TitK I.’NIC Ilf • lie LAMB KNIT- 
> TING MACHINE, families are enabled to pro¬ 
vide everything In knit goods, (anterior In quality 
and at half the cost of common boughten goods. 
The machine knits a pair of socks III 80 minutes, 
shapes them perfectly, oinking Its work the same as 
that produced by band. Any one dependent upon 
their own exertions for tlioir livelihood, ran procure 
It more easily by the use of this machine than In uny 
other way. For Circular and sample stocking, ad¬ 
dress, inclosing stamp. J. D. OltNK A CO., 
1 and 3 Market, St., Rochester, N. V. 
All h.w-prleed Knitting Machines compare with 
Lamb’s Faiutlv Knitter os does a ten-dollar band 
sewing machine with any tiret-elass sewer—like the 
Siuger, Howe, (Hover & Balter, and others. 
DECAPITATION.—No. 11 
AMERICAN SLANG. 
I JERKINS & HOUSE’S NON - EXPLOSIVE 
1 KM ROSEN E LAMP will 
Save your Lives, Glass Lumps Explode, 
Save your Houses, Glass Lamps Break, 
Save your Money, Glass Lumps Waste Oil, 
Rave your Eyes. Glass Lamps Wear Out. 
Prof. W.R. Clark, Pres’t Musa. Ag. College, says : 
“ It is prefect hi non~cipt»sict. The light is belter than 
is produced by any oilier iaiun. I believe it true 
economy, in view of the sujety, i lie quality and quan¬ 
tity of the light, and the durability of this Lamp, to 
throw away all other kiwis liod use tills only/' 
Good Canvassers wanted tor city and country. 
Try a. Lamp. We will gladly refund the money if 
yotn do not like it. 
VOTAW, MONTGOMERY &r CO., 
42 Barclay St., New York, or Cleveland, Ohio. 
Whole Tam lire: behead me and people throng 
mo for pleasure and pure air; behead me again, 
the world is peopled to-day because of the 
fright I onco boro. x. Y. z. 
fisY" Answer iu two weeks. 
IIow It Bothered nn Englishman. 
The utter ignorance of the English of the 
signification of American slang expressions, 
often causes some curious scenes between 
them and Yankee buyers In England, who 
seem to think that because their language 
generally is understood, all their American 
idioms will be. An expert buyer, junior 
partner in one of our largo American firms, 
at a recent visit to his correspondent in an 
English manufacturing city, was compli¬ 
mented by the senior partner of the house, 
who insisted on personally showing goods to 
bis American purchaser. 
“ There, sir," said Dowlas, throwing out a 
roll of goods, “ what do you think of that?” 
“ O, that’s played out,” said the American. 
“ It’s what?” said Bull. 
“ It’s played, 1 tell you,” said liis customer. 
, “Played — alii really — we call it plod 
li’yar in England; but this isn’t plad—you 
know.” 
1 “No,” said the Yankee, “I don’t mean 
■A. plod. I mean ter say it’s gone up,” 
^ “ Ob, no," said the Britisher, “ not at all; 
It. it has not gone up; quite to the contrary. 
, We have taken off from the price.” 
PUZZLER ANSWERS, 
I'ltL ULUIl." I, li.tn " 
1 Most Porrect Manufactory in the United States. 
45,0 O O WOW XIV USE. 
CEO. A. PRINCE &. CO.’S 
ORGANS 6c MELODEONS 
will be delivered iu any part Of the United States 
reached by Express (where they have no agent,) 
FUEK OF CJIAHUK, on receipt of list price. 
Send for Price List and Circulars. Address 
GEO. A. PRINCE & OO., Buffalo, N. Y. 
GEO. A. PRINCE St, CO., Chicago, III. 
Cnoss-WoRn Enigma No. 14.—Wheat. 
Ml«CBf.T.AN"KOU8 ENIGMA No. 10.—The smiles of 
a pretty woman are tJic tears of the purse. 
Geographical Enigma No. 5.—Mind your own 
business and let others alone. 
PROBLEM No. 14— 30*. 
Illustrated incurs No. 12.—’Tis a great saving 
to curtail your expenses within your income. 
CHARADE NO. 10.—Dovetail. 
Decapitation No. 10.—Gold-old. 
Miscellaneous QUmertiscments 
A dvertisements (oun’S index t<» 
for Next of Kin, Chancery Heirs. Legatees, and 
Cases of Unclaimed Money since 1000. Price. 00 ots. 
JOHN HOOPER Si CO., 41 Park Row, New York. 
GREAT REDUCTION 
OARING, COKING AND SLICING IMA- 
L ClIiNH.—Four turns to an apple, Sold ut stores, 
li. H. WHITTEMORB. M’f’r. Worcester, Mass. 
S3T See RuttAL of March 19, outside page. 
IN PRICE OF 
TEAS AND COFFEES 
TO CONFORM TO 
EDWARD SEARS* 
ENGRAVING ESTABLISHMENT 
ELECTKOTYPING, MINTING 
No. 48 Heekinan St.New York 
PRICE OF GOLD 
Increased Facilities to Club Organizers, 
Head for New Price l.ist. 
lllliir/> A D HOW MADE FROM 
VIN EGAR. s w k 
GHUM, in Ten Hours, without using drugs. 
For Circulars, address F. I. SAGE, Vinegar Maker, 
Cromwell, Conn. 
aid Agents in a new business, 
0 NOVELTY CO., Saco, Me. 
A WEEK 
Address SA 
(P. O. Box 5613.) 31 & 33 Vesey St., New York, 
F i ll 1 y m irlH 
mmi 
Mil 
HJiMI 
Vf: 
3m 
