MOOBE’S BUBAL NEW-YORKER. 
*95 
CAN THE DEAD HEAR 1 
DY EBEN E. HEXPOBI). 
Do tbo dead hear us whenever wo oall ? 
Answer mo, darling, ft you can hear, 
Under the grass that covers you over. 
Rank with tho now llfo of the year. 
Answer, darllng-I long to know. 
Often you told me If you were dead, 
And lying under tho sods and daisies. 
Yon would answer the words I said. 
Speak to me. love, and tell me now 
All the secrets of death anil life; 
Are you cold, with the grass growing over, 
And shutting you safely away from strife. 
Are you lonely darling ? I pray you speak. 
If lying so low, my words you hoar. 
Does your dead heart jroarn for tho doar old voices ? 
Do you know, my darltn-'.that I am near? 
You do not answer. I half believe 
That the dead hear never the living’s call: 
Folded about with vest and quiet, 
They sleep as tho flowers sleep tu fall. 
Wl>cn the spring of new life shall come, 
They will hear us and hoed ns, no longer dumb. 
-♦♦♦-— 
WHAT IT IS TO BE AN OLD MAID. 
BY MAY MAPLE. 
try to recuperate her wasted energies and have 
an enjoyable time flirting with her old beaux,— 
if to have every b iboon I hat stands on two feet 
and wear? trousers, boots and whiskers, thrust 
upon you Ms possible husband by your would- 
be friends,—If to wear all these honors (?) Is 
splendid, then Old Maids need nevor sigh for 
brilliant attainments. 
“If to watch tho outgoings and incomings of 
a truly congenial pair, who have been joined 
heart and soul for years In tho all-absorbing 
subject of making tho loved one believe that 
there is no other home for ths affoctlona,—no 
sympathies in tho wide, wide world, like those 
which center about their own hearthstone,— 
and then go to one’s own room anil silently 
think, think <»r the love that was burled In t he 
long igo-or mayhap was stolon by artful cun¬ 
ning and falsehoods Innumerable—till you dose 
the door of the damp vault containing shroud 
and ashes of all you hold most dear, with a jar 
and sigh ’It might have been/ If to feel the 
clasp of small, round, white arms about your 
neck, the print of tho warm kiss nr Innocent 
children upon your cheek,—listen to the merry 
prattle of strawberry lip-5 and know that the 
strongest, purest, sweetest love of the little 
one’s heart is not for you, and that In a few 
months or years at most, your Image will havo 
passed from the memory of tho child;—If all 
these things are ‘splendid,’ then most surely 
may Old Maids thank their stars that wife¬ 
hood and mother-love hive not been theirs to 
cherish." 
ManUtoo Co., Mich., 1874, 
|lciu!tttg for the Jgcntng. 
TWO LITTLE PUSSIES. 
BY ALICE D. LINDSLEY. 
Two little pussies. 
80 soft and gray. 
Oh! what a noise they make 
In their wild play; 
.Tumping and spitting, 
tlrandmother’s knitting 
Better keep cut of tho way. 
Two little pussies 
So fast asleep. 
Ha 1 ha ! you rascals, 
I saw you peep 
At that poor spider, 
Ah! woo betide her, 
Softly towards her you creep. 
Two little pussies, 
nappy and free; 
Stop for a moment, 
Listen to me. 
In your wild gambols. 
In all your rambles, 
yev«r a mouse do you see * 
Dear llttlo pussies. 
Oh rrs! I know 
Out of sweet kittonhoml 
8 otin you will grow ; 
Then yiill’ll bo gr.iwling, 
Always bo prowling 
In holes whoro kit term don’t go. 
“It must bo splendid to ho an old maid and 
have lots of nine things to wear, with no or e to 
find fault and look cross when you hsh favors, 
and call you extravagant. No rude, boisterous 
children to soil tbo pretty white muslin or 
shimmering silk an soon as you have completed 
your tollot-no crytng baby to take up just 
when you arc tired to death, and desire to Hit, 
down with tho lost, magazine and out the crisp 
leaves and finish tho story that wns to be con¬ 
cluded In this number”—said Cousin Mattie 
to her old friend Nina Greyson, one bright 
June morning ns they sat In Cousin M attie’s 
prettily-furnished guest chamber. Each had 
plucked her thlrty-Ufth birthday from the tree 
of life. 
Cousin M ATTin bad been married twelve years 
and was the mother of five active, handsome 
children. Deep linos of care wore stamped 
upon her brow; her raven hair was thickly 
threaded with silver, and her once sparkling 
hazel eyes were weak and watery. On this par¬ 
ticular occasion she was robod in a silk wrap¬ 
per, with linen collar and cuffs somewhat the 
worse for baby's buttered fingers, Mrs. Carl¬ 
ton kept but oue servant, and with ao many 
little ones to “command disturbance," It was 
hardly to bo expected that all things would be 
In the most harmonious order on every occa¬ 
sion, and this frequently btought a frown and 
fretful words. What wonder then that a little 
sigh escaped as she contrasted hr r present self 
with her friend and visitor. In tholr younger 
days Mrs. Carlton had boon styled tho beauty 
and wit, and had fur outstripped MUa N IN A In 
the number of flirtations. 
Now Nina sat by tho open window, Inhuling 
the sweet odor of the roses wafted upon the 
waves of a southern breeze, robed In a snowy 
muslin with delicate lace nt throat and wrist. 
In the soft rippling waves of her glossy brown 
hair rested a fresh rosebud, with its dewy emer¬ 
ald leaves, as cosily as if It had never known 
any other abiding place. Her face was not quite 
youthful, though but few would ever guess 
more than twenty-six summer* had come to 
her experience with their (lilting sunlights and 
shadows. Her eyes, which had vied with a June 
sky for depth and color In childhood, still re¬ 
tained their brilliancy; tho pale, dellcato com¬ 
plexion was yet fair and her form vas graceful 
in tho extreme. Indeed, Nina Grkyson made 
a ploaaaut picture upon which to rest one’s eyes 
that warm June morning. 
The ladles chatted of circumstances and fash¬ 
ions for half an hour; thou there was a sharp 
call from the nursery for Mattie. Nina still 
sat by the open window, but tho dainty needle¬ 
work slipped from her fingers, while thoughts, 
pleasant and otherwise, were rife In her active 
mind. Presently she took from the table an 
elegant Inlaid writing desk, and began writing 
as follows in her Jnurnal: 
“ Mattie thinks It must be splendid to be an 
«maid.’. Years ago, when her bridal wreath 
was yet greon, and she was enjoying the honey¬ 
moon, she thought a spinster’s llfo of all things 
the most unblessed. Ah, well! the long, bit- 
tor years of experience have taught us both 
many lessons; and each heart has learned to 
take silently many nauseous draughts. Each 
puts on an olesant robe, a cheorfnl smile, and 
tho world prouounees her a happy woman. 
“ If to t>e spoken of by wornout, faded, en¬ 
vious married ladles as ‘ that old maid who tries 
to retain her youthful appearance and wears 
bright ribhons ahd gay dress -s to catch tho eyes 
and attention of all the gentlemen In town'- 
to hear It whispered about ‘ she is a good many 
years older than I, but she uses cosmetics to 
make herself look young, and wears false teeth 
and curls,’ (as though Mrs. A. never stooped to 
any of these things, nor wouldn’t if site could,J 
if to ho Auntie to all the fair-faced or dirty- 
mouthed children In thecountry, and of course 
expected to play the amiable nursery maid, 
dress all the dolls, whether of wax orolay, when 
not convenient for mamma, turn governess or 
housekeeper whllo she goes to the city or coun- 
HUMAN FIGS. 
The people who havo roared largo families of 
children without any hoys and girls among 
them are unfortunate. There are such people. 
A child without any childhood Ib a miserable 
little animal, and tho poorest compliment that 
can be paid to a boy if it is a true one is that 
ho is “ a little man.” I have road somewhere— 
perhaps It Is a mistake—that a fig makes Its 
appearance upon tho tree a (Ig, suffering no 
progressive changes except to grow biggsr. 
Once a fig, always a fig. I do not think wo 
want any more human figs. First the baby, 
then the breezy boy, then tho boots, then tho 
bother, then the young man, then tho hope of 
the homestead-that. Is the good, old-fashioned 
order of development. Not having the delight 
of sitting under iny “own vino and fig true," 
perhaps my knowledge of figs 1 * imperfect, but 
yot I Insist upon tho boy. We do not want him 
wise and profound and owl-like and riglit- 
angle-trlangled. What becomes of tho preco¬ 
cious children seven or eight years Older at 
their heads than they are at their heels ? Once 
in a hundred times do they turn Into anything 
at all—say Into men ? Oall tho roll and see. 
-- 
HOW TO PUT CHILDREN TO BED. 
Not with reproof for any of that day’s sin* of 
omission or commission. Take any time but 
bod-time for that. If you over heard a Utile 
creature sighing or sobbing in Its sloop, you 
could never do this. Seal their closing eyelids 
with a kiss and a blessing. The tlmo will come 
when, all too soon, they will lay their heads 
upon their pillows lacking both. Let them then, 
at least, havo this sweet memory of a happy 
childhood, or which no future Borrnw or 
trouble can rob them. Give them their rosy 
youth. Nor need this Involve wild license. The 
judicious parent will not so mistake ray mean¬ 
ing. If you have over met the man, or the 
woman, whoso eyes havo suddenly filled when 
a little child has crept trustingly to Its mother’s 
breast, you may havo seen one in whose eld Id- 
hood’s home “Dignity " and “ Severity " stood 
where love and pity should have been. Too 
much indulgence has ruined thousands of chll- 
j drou; too much love, not one .—Fnnny Fern. 
FLOWERS ON DINING TABLES. 
Nothing can equal tho beauty and appropri¬ 
ateness of flower* at meal tlmo, and during 
this seas m they should never for once bo ab¬ 
sent. It. i* a o us tom which should become uni¬ 
versal among rich and poor. Even grasses and 
leaves and fern* add cheerfulness to the room, 
and to tho hearts of those assembled around 
the board. Very pretty ornaments are made 
by uniting fruits and flowers. Suoh fruits aa 
have long stems or grow on slender branches 
are better suited, such as strawberries, cherries, 
ourrapta, gooseberries, etc. But no matter 
what the flower* or lrults are, or what may be 
used to put them in, let them be found upon 
the tables at this floral season. Sot the chil¬ 
dren to preparing the dinner-table bouquets; 
It will prove a useful les> on to them, and beget 
a love for flowers and floral ornaments. 
Every condition in lire haa lta advantages 
and its peculiar source of happiness. It is uot 
the houses and the streets which make tho city, 
but those who frequent them; U Is not tho 
fields which make the country, but those who 
cultivate them. He Is wisest who best utilizes 
his circumstances, or, to translate it, his sur- 
roundlnga; and happiness. If wodosorve It, will 
find us, wherever our lot may be cast. 
The firm foot Is that which finds firm footing; 
the weak falters, although it bo standing on a 
rook. 
MRS. TOP-KNOT’S TROUBLES. 
RY MRS. E. V. RILL. 
CuT-cut-cwt-taw cut, cut-cut I” 
“ O, dear, there’s that dreadful boy again ! T 
never can cucklo the least llttlo bit, but bo's 
sure to boar me 1 1 never had such trouble In 
all my Ufa beforo, cut-cut-cut 1 ” and Mrs. 
Top-Knot hurried away from her nest in tho 
old wugm box, hoping Harry hadn’t seen 
where she came off. 
But yes lie had been hunting for hor nost for 
several days, and his prying eyes soon found 
Out her treasures, and Ida eager hands carried 
them off. Mrs. Top-Knot was discouraged, and 
angry too. “I declare it's a burning shame I— 
o:;t-cut-out. Hero H Is almost the first of May, 
and no sign of settln' yot. I do my best evory 
day, but I can’t got ahead one bit. Why didn’t 
than boy lay his own eggs 1 wonder? T never 
was so behind tlmo before. Why last year I 
counted my chickens full two wooks before 
any of my neighbors, and now only to think, 
Mrs. Featherlegs, la Just ready to bring off her 
brood, and Mrs. Spcoklcsido* with her neat 
rulfof oggs. What airs they will put on—tho 
common tilings 1 O, that dreadful boy I ’’ 
Mrs. Top-Knot walked up and down tho barn¬ 
yard, at her “wit’s end " what to do, and whoro 
to make hor nest where Harry wouldn’t find 
It. “I’ve crawled under tho straw-stack till I 
almost smothered, but he can crawl like a 
worm. I flow high up In the mow, but, he can 
climb like a oat. I hid way down the lane, be¬ 
hind tho elder bush, but lie can hunt like a dog. 
I'spose If l should go to tho moon, he'd get 
there too. O, dear, where shall I go? ” 
“ Lazy chickens, as they say, 
Do not hatch their chicks t.111 May, 
But I’m sure It will bo June, 
If I don’t beam it soon." 
There Is no knowing what other rhymes Mrs. 
Top-Knot’s crazy brain might have thought of. 
If Harry had uot just then come out of the 
corn house with some feed for t.ho chickens. 
It so happened a rat came out from under tho 
barn and ran inward the crib, which so fright¬ 
ened him that he dropped the basket and ran 
to the house as fast as ho could, for Harry was 
dreadfully afraid of rats. 
Mrs. Top-Knot saw Harry run, and for what, 
reason. “Cut.-cnt-cut. I’m glad there 
thing you’re afraid of; I’ll fix you now Master 
HARRY 1 and Mrs. Top-Knot cackled as Joyfully 
as If she had already her ne«t full of oggs. Har¬ 
ry kept rather shy of the barn for a few day9. 
Ho hunted everywhere elao for his favorite 
eggs, but without aucces*. 
“ I wonder where Top-Knot has hid her nest 
this time, plague on her! I’ll hunt It out, see If 
I don’t" 
Just then, as if to defy him to do It, Top-Knot 
came out from under the barn, cackling with 
all hor might, and run off a llttlo ways to watch 
what he would do. 
“Under the barn, hey! is it this time old 
lady? V hat dbl your ladyship go undor there 
for I wonder ( It’s too dark, and dirty for such 
an arlstcoratlc ben ns yon.” and Habry stooped 
down to look, but dare not fpr the life of him 
go under. 
“ Rats, rats, rats." called Top-Knot,but Har¬ 
ry thought she only said “ cut-cut-cuts,so 
ho went and got tho longest rako ho could find, 
saying, “ I guess I'll fetch ’em now," but ho 
couldn't roach tho eggs by two yards or more. 
Perhaps Top-Knot had forseensuch an attempt 
and provided for its failure. 
“I guess I’ll have to glvo 'cm up this time, 
sure enough," said Harry, Ida face vory rod, 
and clothes dirty with tho vain reaching. 
Every day Mrs. Top-Knot would run out from 
under the harn and cackle as loud as sho 
pleased, without any fear of her nest being 
robbed. It was very provoking to HARRY, but 
that didn’t matter. Hadn’t sho as good a right 
to rejoice over her duty done aa any other hen ? 
In course of time her cockling c*n«od, p.nd 
she practiced Instead a subdued " c.luck, cluok. 
Cluck," as If getting ready for her maternal 
duties. Tho vory first day of Juno she brought 
off tho nost nine little yellow chicks; perhaps 
the rats could toll what bocamo oT the other 
four. How proud she was ns she led them up 
to the bouse for meal, Mr*. Specklesldca looked 
disdainfully at. tho late comers why, her brood 
were dressed in all colors, and wore able to 
scratch for themselves, Willie Mrs. Foatherlog's 
early] chicks could already r»ost under the 
shed. 
“Gluck, cluck, cluok," called Mrs. Top-Knot, 
in a loud voice. " Remember, my children,you 
are not common Spocklcsido*, nor Featherlegs, 
but belong to tho aristocratic family of Tup- 
Knots 1 Associate only with your equals my 
dears,” and proudly sho walked away, nodding 
her plumes. 
HARRY soon spted them, and would havo 
killed them with ovor-foodlng, If his aunt had 
not cautioned him. “Alnt they beauties, 
though 1 " lie exclaimed one day later in tho 
season, when their beauties began to develop. 
“Top-Knot*, and a comb too! Aunt Jane, 
may I have some of them when I go home next 
•week? ” 
“Cluck, cluok, cluck," said Mrs. Top-Knot. 
“That boy robbed mo of my eggs, and now he 
would rob mo of my chicks! O, dear, what 
were boys mado for 1 wonder I—cluck, cluck, 
oluek," and sho hurried with hor brood to ber 
safe retreat under the barn. 
-- ■» • » ■ ■ ■ — 
"AN EXCITING TAIL." 
[See rage 193.] 
All four pussies In our Illustration seem to 
find that long, slender, black lino pooping out 
from the crack In tho floor a vory “exciting 
tail" indeed, to judge fiom their absorbed cour- 
tenancos, and their anxloua wWo-opcnod eyos. 
This, we should think. Is tho first lime tho kit¬ 
tle." have had a glimpse even of tho tall of a rat, 
and wo can fancy mamma Improving the occa¬ 
sion by relating tales and advent ureB sho has had 
with unfortunate rodents In days gone by, and 
nstruetlng Her children in all the patient arts 
of drowsing over a hole for hours together un¬ 
til tho Inmate, emboldened by the silence ami 
immobility of tho watcher. thlnk 6 sho has gone 
to sleep, and ventures out of his hiding-place, 
only to be speedily disabused of his error by 
finding himself In a trice safe In pussy’s claws. 
A small Milwaukee hoy thinks it absurd to 
ask $50 for a thrashing machine when his moth¬ 
er only pays $2 a pair for slippers. 
xt Duster. 
r 
PROBLEM.—No. 9. 
There Is n field In the shape of an isosceles 
triangle, which contains six tlmo* «3 many 
square rods in its area as there are lineal rods 
in its perimeter, whllo the greatest square it is 
posslblo to construct within It contains just 2% 
acres. Required, tho base and ono ot tho sides 
of the triangle. 
A 
u r o 
Area ABC In sq. rods .—6 times the length of 
ABx BCx C A In rods; aa to the number In oaeh; 
area DEFG- 2 M acres. 
B. F. Burleson. 
Answer In two weeks. 
HISTORICAL ENIGMA.—No. 1. 
I AM composed of 24 letters: 
My 17, 8 , 4,18,11,17,24 was a United States Pres¬ 
ident. 
My 18,33,11, 21 was a name famous In history. 
My 2,15,12,14, 28,1 was a United States Presi¬ 
dent. 
My 20,12, 21,18 was a queen who ruled while 
America was owned by England. 
My 7,10,1,14,5,1 was a United States President. 
My 8,19,1, 14,22, 5, 8 Is the " land of tho free.” 
Ml 11 Ions of cn rscs n n d id essl n gs wero sh owored 
upon my whole. H - B - 
Answer in two weeks. 
--- 
PUZZLER ANSWERS.-Sept. 5. 
Anagram No. 3.— 
“I come from haunts of coot and hern, 
I make a sudden sally, 
And sparkle out among the fern 
To bicker down a valley.” 
[Tmnuson's “ Sana of the Brook.” 
Cross-word Enigma No. 5.—Love God Now. 
Problem No. 7.— j Major axis, lfl 97256058 rods. 
( Minor axis, 13.00281104 do. 
Jl 
