THE FAMILY MEETING, 
his amazement at the astonishing Jack of rev¬ 
erence, deference and politeness manifested by 
the young people in this country toward their 
parents and all elderly persons. It was quite 
different in China, he was happy to say. I recall 
an anecdote related to me by a young American 
lady, last summer. “ Father and I were In 
Paris,” she said, “ and one day we went into a 
restaurant to dine. As It happened, I was the 
only lady, and there were probably twenty or 
thirty gentlemen. When we came ont. every 
one, to a man, rose to his feet and remained 
standing until we had passed from the room. I 
confess that I was somewhat surprised, al¬ 
though having been accustomed everywhere 
ever, went shopping very plainly clad. In the 
great store where she went none of the clerks 
knew she was rich, and on account of her shab¬ 
by appearance snubbed her, and paid tier no 
attention. One among them, however, from 
habits of politeness, invariably treated her 
quite the same as if she had been a grand lady. 
This continued for two or three years, when 
one day the old lady asked the clerk if ho would 
not like to go Into business for himself. He 
said he should, but he had not the means. The 
result was that the lady started the young man 
in business with a handsome capital and he 
grew to be a great merchant; all because he 
was polite. Everybody who (ravels about, the 
1 . Say 44 Yea” and 44 No, madame,” instead of 
“Ma’am.” 
2. lorni the habit of saying “ Good morning” 
and “ Good night” to the members of your own 
family. Among the best bred people, it is cus¬ 
tomary to shake hands upon parting for the 
night. 
». Upon entering a room In which there are 
people strangers or otherwise in the parlor 
of a private house or hotel, recognize their pres¬ 
ence by a how and a “ Good morning.” 
4. Upon taking and leavlngyour seat at table, 
bow to the people seated opposite or near you. 
5. Do not ask strangers to pass you dishes at 
table if there be waiters to do it. 
ti. Never monopolize the best seat in a room 
If there be others better entitled to It by reason 
of years or infirmities. 
7. In conducting a person In or out of a room 
follow, and do not precede unless the way be a 
dark one. 
8. Never omit to do a. kindness, no matter 
who the person in need of it may lie. You have 
only to imagine yourself In his place to know 
whether It. will be acceptable. 
9. no very punctilious about acknowledging 
favors. If the doing of them have involved 
trouble or sacrifice, express your thanks with 
suitable emphasis. 
10. If desiring to make a change In the tern- 
perature or light of a room where there are 
others, first learn If It will be agreeable to them. 
11. Do not hesitate to proffer assistance to any 
one seeming In need of it. 
12. When making an Inquiry of a stranger, 
preface your request with, “ I beg your pardon, 
air, but can you be so kind as to toll ine?” etc., 
etc., and than king him heartily for his kindness. 
13. If obliged to have a remark repeated, say, 
“ I beg pardon, mariame, but I did not under¬ 
stand," etc. 
14. Do not speak “across” a person to one 
sitting on the other side, without ample apol¬ 
ogy, for It is a breach of etiquette. 
15. Be careful not to give pain to another by 
look, word or manner. 
18. Respect all honest ©pinions, no matter 
how they may differ from yours. 
17. When an aged or distinguished person 
enters your presence, rise out of respect to him 
or her. 
With respect to the courtesies due from men 
to women, there are some special rules well- 
bred men never depart from. 
1. Rise when a lady enters a room and remain 
so until you see that she is seated or has no de¬ 
sire to be. 
2< Lift your hat from your head and bow when 
meeting and parting with a lady; also upon 
passing a lady in halls or stairs, In streets and 
promenades not much frequented. 
3. Give to & lady precedence upon entering 
and leaving a room. 
4. Do not stand talking to ladles with your 
hat on. Remove your hat when making pur¬ 
chases of a lady, or in visiting picture galleries 
or other places where ladies are. 
5. Never countenance in any way a gross or 
impure remark concerning a lady, made in a 
public place. 
6. Treat all women with marked deference, 
as if they were your superiors, for in that, way 
you iliustrato your own superiority, and add to 
your self-respect. 
A word to the girls must close this article. 
In proportion as men pay you deference, show 
your appreciation and merit of it. Never b e 
guilty of accepting favors as If they woro your 
right, hut ns courtesies. Re shy about, urging 
or soliciting visits from men. Ft should rather 
bo your prerogative to he asked by men for per¬ 
mission to visit you. Place a high value upon 
yourselves and then devote your life to make 
yourselves worthy of it. Very truly yours, 
Mintwood. 
We’rk all here! 
Father, mother. 
Sister, brother. 
All who hold each other dear. 
Each chair is ailed—we’re all at home 
To-night, let no cold stranger come, 
II Is not often thus around 
Onr familiar hearth we're found. 
Bless, then, the meeting and the spot 
For once be every care forgot; 
I.e» gentle P. ace assert her power. 
And kind affection rule the hour; 
We’re all—all here. 
We’re not all here 
Some are away—the dead ones dear. 
Who thronged with ns this ancient hearth 
And gave the hour to guileless mirth; 
Fate, with a stern, relentless hand, 
Looked in and thinned our little band; 
Some tike a night flash passed away. 
And some sank, lingering, day by day : 
The quiet graveyard-some lie there— 
We’re not all here. 
We’re not all here! 
Even tbey--the dead— though dear, so dear. 
Fond Memory, to her duty true. 
Brings hark their faded forms to view. 
How life-like, through ibe mist of years. 
Each well-remembeiod face appears! 
We see them as in times lung j ast; 
From each to each klud looks are cast; 
We hear their words, their smiles behold, 
They’re round us us they were of old— 
We are all here. 
We are all here! 
Father, mother. 
Sister, brother. 
You that 1 love with love so dear. 
This may not long of us be said. 
Soon we must join the gathered dead. 
And by the hearth we now sit round 
8ome other circle will be found. 
O, then, that wisdom may we know. 
Which yields a life of peace below ! 
So, In the world to follow this, 
May each repeat. In words of bliss. 
We’re all—all here! 
{Charles Sprague 
DOCTRINAL POINTS OF POLITENESS. 
FOR BOYS AND GIRLS 
There is no one thing in our character as a 
people which receives such merciless castiga¬ 
tion at the hands of other nations as onr re¬ 
markable Impoliteneis. 1 .remember talking 
with an exceedingly well-bred Greek gentle¬ 
man once In regard to this, and In proof of our 
good breeding oltod an American whom he 
knew. 
“ Yes, Mr. C- it a gentleman I admit that; 
bid it U i because he. hm lived tUjht yearn in Partis!” 
he replied. 
Not many weeks ago I made the acquaintance 
of a French lady who had been teacher for 
many years in families Of high distinction In 
Paris and Berlin, and I was amused aa well as 
humiliated by her frank and frequent expres¬ 
sions of astonishment at the manners of the 
people about her; and from her own point of 
view she had every reason either to feel herself 
insulted or that all the men In the house were 
most unqualified boors. Talking with me one 
day in the drawing room of the house in which 
we both lived, other occupants entered, so that 
she sat with her buck towards them. 
“ I was taught,” she said. In apology, “ not to 
sit with my back towards people; but hero in 
America, It seems to be the custom.” 
“ Oh, no," I said, “ we are not quite so bad as 
that; we too aro taught that It Is not etiquette, 
however much we may violate such teaching In 
practice. But tell me just what your special 
grievances are against the men In this house, 
as they all claim to be gentlemen.” 
“Well,”she began, “if I meet one on the 
stairs or in the hall, he never lifts his hat nor 
bows, nor says, 4 Good morning,’ and lie passes 
through the drawing room where ladles are 
without bowing. I have been here a week and 
the man who sits at the head of the table at my 
right never looks up nor recognizes me in any 
way when I come to my meals. I say It is out¬ 
rageous rudeness! The humblest peasant in 
all France Is a thousand-fold better bred than 
that.” 
I could not deny her assertion, for J knew It 
to be only too true. I have a vague recollection 
that when I was a very little girl going to and 
from a oountry district school, that “ we girls” 
were taught to curtsey upon passing strangers 
in the road, and that upon seeing a wagon ap¬ 
proaching we would naturally make prepara¬ 
tion for the coming salutation, which 44 the 
boys” also observed by lifting their hats and 
bowing. I should not know where to go to And 
that custom among school children in vogue 
to-day. The custom that prevailed there, also, 
among men, of recognizing each other as they 
passed In the roads, has also largely passed 
away. The politeness and deference that mark¬ 
ed the best society in revolutionary times, when 
the people copied the manners of Hie English 
and French, have faded from existence, and In 
their stead we have rudeness, pertness, a shock¬ 
ing amount of impudence, boldness and vul¬ 
garity in manifold forms. 
A Chinaman who delivered a very Interesting 
address in Philadelphia last winter, expressed 
uurmg soveu years abroad, to marked courtesy 
from men; but I was nevertheless pleased at 
this extraordinary deference paid to my sex." 
1 was then spending some time with friends 
in Ithaca, N. Y., and a few days later I went 
with a party of ladles to visit the grounds and 
buildings of Cornell U nivarsity. It was on Sat¬ 
urday, and the classes were not In session, but 
we everywhere encountered in lecture rooms, 
workshops and about the grounds, students; 
and in no one instance did astudentitft Ids hat 
or bow, or in any way show by his manner that 
we were anything different from posts, trees or 
wheelbarrows. President WntTE was aUo es¬ 
corting about a party of distinguished gentle¬ 
men from a distant city, but not even to them 
did 1 see a student proffer the commou saluta¬ 
tion of lifting his hat and bowing when meeting 
them. Although no stickler for useless con¬ 
ventionalities, I was pained and shocked at the 
universal lack of even civil breeding in a great 
University like that, which ought to be a cen¬ 
ter of polite and refining influences. If there 
was need of one tiling more than another. It 
was that of a Professorship of Politeness. 
But the fault does not lie in Universities, a 3 
It is not the province of schools and colleges to 
teach boys and girls the first elements of good 
behavior. The fault, and the whole fault, lies 
with fathers and mothers, the early educators 
of youth. They utterly fall to appreciate the 
immense importance of politeness. Not a few 
are so narrow and stupid aa to rank politeness 
with obsequiousness, while others imagine to 
see hypocrisy, falsehood and deceit concealed 
under the garb of lino breeding. 
If I go to a hank to get a check cashed and it 
be a few momenta after bank hours, nine clerks 
out of ten will shout at me, “Can’t cash your 
check, madame—bank closed!" while the tenth 
will say, “ I am very sorry that I cannot oblige 
you, madame; but our rules are very strict.” 
Aa a natural result, I will henceforth go to 
bauk No. Ten, simply because the clerk there 
(s not gruff nor rude In hta manner. 
A story was afloat in the newspapers a time 
ago, concerning a very rich old lady who, how- 
tha incalculable gain won by politeness, espec¬ 
ially among tradespeople. I have made pur¬ 
chases repeatedly, simply bocauae the dork 
who served me was polite. I have scores of 
times seen men and women of very humble 
appearance rlBe vastly superior to those about 
them, simply on the ground of politeness. It 
is something to bo taught children aa much as 
truthfulness, temperance and honesty. It Is a 
stepping stone to respect. It is a credential 
that Introduces one into good society. It, forms 
the diplomacy of everyday life. It Invests life 
with a now charm. It-adds to the dignity of 
humanity. It keeps open and develops the 
natural kindness of the heart. 
In the average country household the usual 
rules of politeness are theseNot to put food 
in the mouth with a knife; not to sit in the 
house with the hat on ; not to eat resting the 
elbows on the table; not to pass before people 
when one can pass behind; to say 44 Please," 
and “Thank you;” not to spit on the floor; 
HOW MRS. POLLY HAD THE BLUES, 
UY LUCY C. OHOWAY 
“There is nothing like a real, good, old- 
fashioned rag carpet for steady, every - day 
wear, 1 think," remarked Mrs. Polly In one 
of her long sentences without any commas. 
“We’ve worn out three in our kitchen, and 1 
have almost enough for another." 
She brought, from the storeroom a huge bas¬ 
ket of tangled strips, ready out for Joining, and 
another of tightiy-wound balls. There were 
bits of bonnet strings that had seen better 
days, suggestions of dresses that had been the 
pride of the three-years-old baby not many 
months ago, a piece of JAMES’ old coat and half 
of the cravat which he had worn at his wed¬ 
ding. James has only been married a year. 
There was the old red tablecloth, too, cut into 
bright ribbons; 44 for," said Mrs. Polly, when 
she brought It to the sacrifice, “It’s only cot¬ 
ton, and Is about worn out, anyway.” That 
was the day when Maktiia secretly hid her 
new white lawn, for “ when mother once suc¬ 
cumbed to the carpet fever, every piece of dry¬ 
goods In the house might tremble with fear!” 
Ah! If the soft heap in that basket could but 
speak, what tales it could unfold ! 
“I’ll just count the bails, I guoBS, and see 
how many pounds 1 have,” said Mrs. Polly to 
herself. Let me see. 1 should think they 
would ench weigh a pound, at least ’’—balancing 
one in her hand. She considered a moment, 
then rose from her chair and walked Into the 
kitchen. Presently she returned and brought 
with her the steelyards. 44 1 never did believe 
In those new-fangled weighing affairs,” Mrs. 
