l THE| | MITCHE L L 
SPARKS AND 8PLINTERS, 
Sens to produce short crops—the barber's 
shears. 
MOORE’S RURAL NEW-YORKER. 
JUNE § 
UVJUBi CVI VIVU SUV SKI vwvu wv* —-- 
rial knee. 
Speaking of the round world, much can be 
said on both eld as. 
Waistinq sweetness—putting your arm 
about a pretty woman. 
As you cannot avoid your own company, 
make it as good as possible. 
Why is a compositor like a cripple ? Because 
be can't get along without a stick. 
Susan Jane must have been scantily dressed 
when she was looking out for her lover and 
sang— 
He’ll come to-night; the wind’s at rest, 
The moon is full and fair, 
I’ll wear the dress that pleased him best— 
A ribbon In my hair.” 
Patrick Ureen generally signs his name In 
full, as he thinks “ P. Green " is too suggestive 
a signature. 
A COOP Lie, short of money, gave a clergyman 
in Cedar Springs a dog and an accordeon for 
marrying them. 
A celkuratkd barrister was In the habit of 
saying, “ 1 always study the feas-ibility of a case 
before I undertake it.” 
The other day, when a bank In Arkansas 
suspended, the deposltera showed a strong in¬ 
clination to suspend the bankers. 
A Saratoga crocus put it* head out of bud, 
the other morning and said—" You lilac every¬ 
thing if you say this Isn't spring.” 
A “ PFKRDLSTUAASKNEIijllNIlAllNWAaKN " is 
what they call a horse car In Berlin. How does 
a man call It when he's In a hurry. 
An international Society of Aquafortists has 
been founded at Brussels. Now here is a 
chance for the temporauce crusaders. 
Now that there is no longer any occasion for 
secrecy, won’t Air. Spinner be kind enough to 
tell us what the two initials to Ills name really 
are ? 
Question for a Debating Society.—” If a man 
has a tiger by the tall, which would bo the best 
for Ills personal safety—to hold on or to let 
go?” 
Never trust with a secret a married man who 
loves his wife, for he will toll her, and she 
will tell her sister, and her sister will tell every¬ 
body. 
The following words met the eyes of the 
Home Rulers invited to a recent public meet¬ 
ing at New York “ Cum sober or don’t come 
a tall.” 
One of the meanest” canal frauds "is thought 
to be shouting ” low bridge ” to a priina donna 
who used to cook on a canal boat, just to see 
her drop. 
Ever since we have heard of the Maine edi¬ 
tor named T, Pot, we have been filled with 
anxiety to know if a trifle would make him 
boll over. 
”1 hope this hand Is not counterfeit,” said a 
lover as he was toying with his sweetheart's 
hand. “The beat way to find it out is to ring 
it,” was the reply. 
” Do you know who I am ?” asked a police¬ 
man of a fellow whom he hud seized by the 
throat. “Not exactly, sir; but 1 fancy you are 
the malignant collarer.” 
There was an old woman utnl, what do you think? 
She dressed herself gaily In sky-blue and pink, 
With nice painted eyebrows, and lovely false 
curls, 
And affected the ways of the gayest young * gurls.’ 
This dreadful old woman's Bole object in life 
Was to find some young swell who would make her 
his wife; 
And, as she hail gold her old ruins to gild, 
The old woman’s seeming wild hope was fulfilled. 
A small boy In New Haven made a sensation 
for a short time by quietly transferring a card 
bearing the words “Take oue,” from a lot of 
handbills in front of a store to a basket of 
oranges. 
It Is reported that a somewhat Juvenile 
dandy said to a fair partner at a ball; “ Miss, 
don’t you think my moustaches are becom¬ 
ing?” to whieh Mbs replied ; “Well 9lr,they 
may becoming, but they haven’t arrived yet." 
The writer of this had poetry in his soul; 
"You may go on inventing washing machines 
for the next fifty yours, but to the average eye ' 
you can’t patent anything equal to the sight of 
a lady's diamond rings flashing in and out of 
the sparkling suds, as she thumps a wet towel 
up and down the washboard.” 
Somebody has said that a Yankee baby In 
the cradle, sucking his thumbs, is thinking up 
a plan to Improve the rocking machine. And. 
somebody else says If a Connecticut Yankee 
should be shipwrecked some night, he would 
paddle ashore, and bo round the next morning 
trying to sell the inhabitants a map of the 
place. 
I 
Tell me ye winged winds that round my I 
pathway roar, do ye know some spot where j 
women fret uo more—some lone and pleasant 1 
dell, some “holler” In the ground, where 
babies never yell, and cradles nv not found I f 
The loud wind blew the snow Into my face, 
and calmly answered “ There Is no such 
place.” 
— 
KID-GLOVE 3EAV DtIVI ASSISTANT. 
“ I am informed. Sir, that you desire to obtain the assistance of an experienced 
person in your agricultural labors : if so, I am willing to engage for that purp 
a term of months.” , . 
Farmer. —“ Law no ! I only want to hire a man to work on the farm . 
JL occupations. 
Spring Overcoat*, 85, sio. ^ A CV * Suits, | 910 . 
Spring Overcoat*, sis, 820 . ® UIT8 ’ 't * 15 ’ 
Spring Overcoat*, 825, 830. . Suit*, * 920 . 
e 11 Suit*, I?i 830. 
Suits, 8i®. ^VY. ^ D c 
Suits, l 820 . , Q * f UITS ’ * 3 ’ * 5 ' 
Suits, 1 830. S° YS ’ 2 UITS ’ * 8 ’ * 10 * 
Suits, N 810 . / W Bovs’ Suits, 815 , 820 . 
fl J I... Mnil I By our New Rules lor Self-Measure (Introduced In 18C5 and used 
Urtiers DV IYI 311 . I by thousands), parties in all parts of the country order direct from us, 
— ... .1 ■nr- ■ - — with the certainty of receiving the mo9t perfect Fit attainable. 
RULE* FOR SKLF-MEASl) HE, Samples, Pooka of Fashion, and Price-List Sent Free on 
Application. EST In writing for Samples, please specify as nearly as possible kinds of goods required. 
Til E M ITCH E Tj T i W A Q 01ST. 
Suit*, 
y 
815. 
Suit*, 
i 
o 
820. 
Suit*, 
“1 
a 
830. 
Suit*, 
r 1 
810. 
TITE MITCH! 
THE 
Best Proportioned, 
Best Ironed, 
ANP 
Lightest Running 
\Fagon in the Market 
11ie original, veil 
known 
EAOIN E WAGON __ 
UKIiSK’S ADJUSTABLE STENCIL LETTERS. 
A SIMPLE DEVICE, MY WHICH ANY NAME OR ADDRESS 
- cun bo farnio-l In n momuut, And be iu xvjiillfy ilUlributMil* ror 
bv Hardware Denlori and bWlonera. Scmt fur Uliuulhrj. va&i 
of Ohio, B. £. ITALIC A CO., nmi 68 l'nrk Win*, Xew York ; 
Ohio and West, O. U. BRYANT, 102 W ashington Street, Chicago. 
TILE MILLS! 
Warranted Two Years!! 
FOR PRICKS, &0., ADDRESS 
A. N. HADLEY & CO., 
1 ndittnnpolis. Inti. 
W ANTED IMMEDIATELY 
A few more young men and women to learn Book W 
keeping, T'enmnushlp,Se.,to nil posSllonaat a sal¬ 
ary of *800 to »1500 per year. Salary jrfild while ■ 
learning Situations guaranteed. Address with ■ 
stamp M. W.Cobb. Bros. Bus. Cuff, PuduusvUle.O. ■ 
^9k fnm a day guaranteed using otir Well 
Auger Sl Drills. $100 a month 
1 1 pair to good Agents. Auger book 
■IP ■■ fr*:e. JiU Auger Co., St. Louis, Mo. 
Branch Offices A Factory: 506 West St-, NEW YORK. 
810 South 3d Street, ST. LOUIS. MO. 
83 West Van Buren Street. CHICAGO, ILL._ 
ANY SHADE YHOil PURE WHITE TO JET BLACK. 
We have many testimonials <>ke the following, 
from M, F, SHEfTARD 4 CO.. Proa Van, N. Y. 
“We believe It to be the BEST PAINT manu¬ 
factured.” . . „ 
Be sure that nur TRA DE M A BK (a fsc-slmlle 
of which Is given above' Is on every package. 
Prepared ready for use, and sold by the gillon only. 
Send for Sample Card <m4 l‘net Hit. 
WOLCOTT BROS 
Real Estate and Loan Brokers, 
Cor. Summit and Monroe Sts., 
TOLEDO, 0. 
Real Estate purchased, managed and sold on com¬ 
mission. Large properties and manufacturing estab¬ 
lishments a specialty. Money loaned on Real Estate. 
All money and papers remitted through banks. 
CORRESPONDENCE SOLICITED. 
liny the CHARTER OAK I,AW N AIOWER. 
P ermanent empi.oyment.-we ark 
prepared to furnish employment to Males and 
Females In every section of the 1L 8. at h fair cush 
salary. Address with stump. UNION PUBLISHING 
CO., Drawer 530, Chicago, 111. 
GEO. L. BURR, 
FREEMANI& BURR, 
138 & 140 Fulton Street, New York. 
rnilE IMMENSE STOCK, as usual, embraces all the popular Styles and Fabrics, for all ages and 
JL occupations. 
THE WEED 
1W1C HUE Cl 
Claim to have brought out the best Sewing Machine 
for manufacturing uses over produced, 
IT 18 CALLED THE 
In use and fur sale In 
nearly every 
State and Territory 
IN THE UNION. 
All work fully war¬ 
ranted. 
SEND FOB PICICE 
LIST. 
Mitchell, Lewis 
& Co., 
RACINE, W1S. 
S END FOR COMPLETE ILLUSTRATED 
Circular of all Apparatus and Furnishing!, 
for 
CHEESE and BUTTER 
Factories and MILK CONDENSING Ertabliehmtnti. 
New method of manufacture given. H1GUEST 
PREMIUMS at Tweutu-l wo important Fair* and Lr- 
poettlane, including Am. ins', test of three months— 
r 78 and '74—for portable safety 
BOILERS and ENGINES, 
French Burr Stone Grist Mills, dkc. 
SIT Discounts to the trade. 
WHITMAN & BURRELL, Little Falls, N. Y. 
BUY MILLER BRO’S CHEMICA L PAINT. 
GREAT REDUCTION. 
TEAS AND COFFEES 
AT WHOLESALE PRICES. 
Increased Facilities to Club Organizers. 
Send for New Price List. 
T HE GREAT AMERICAN TEA CO. 
P. 0. Box 564 S. 3i & 33 Vesey St., New York 
Moqrk’8 Rural Nkw-Yoiikeu is an excellent. 
Agricultural paper, and very popular. As a family 
visitant It Is hard to beat In the attractions It holds 
forth for young and old. We are pleased to see that 
Mr. Moore Is full of hts old enterprise and bent on 
making the paper belter and better from year to 
year .—Yates Co. Chronicle. 
IT IS VERY STRONG, 
VERY SIMPLE, 
VERY EFFECTIVE, 
AND PERFECTLY SATISFACTORY TO ALL 
WHO HAVE TRIED IT. 
Testimonials furnished on application. Examina¬ 
tion solicited. 
Address as above, at 
HARTFORD. COHN., 
Or at Branch Offices in all leading cities. 
(CIRCULAR.) 
Consumers Importing Tea Co., 
No. 8 Church Street. 
P. O. Boat 5,500. New York City. 
This is a combination of capitalists to supply the 
consumers of Teas throughout the United State- on 
the mutual principle. 
\fo have experienced agents In all the best dig- 
trtotsof China and Jupan to select Teas especially 
for our trade. 
We expect every consumer of Teas 'o render us ail 
the assistance they can in carrying out our enter¬ 
prise, as we make a specialty of SUPPLYING CON¬ 
SUMERS ONLY (and allow no middlemen to make 
any profit on our Importations), wnich will enable 
us to supply them with Teas at prices lower than 
haye ever been known, and Of those fine qualities 
thrt seldom reach tho Interior, being sold only to 
the large cities and among the very wealthy. 
Hoping the consumer will take an Interest in rur 
enterprise, and .end at once for a circular with full 
explanations of how to proceed to obtain our go'nls, 
we remain, „ 
Most respectfully yours, 
Consumers Importing Tea Co., 
No. 8 Church *t., 
P. O. Box 5,509. New York City. 
Entered, according to Act of Congress, In January. 
1874, by the Consumers Importing Tea Co., In the 
Office of the Librarian of Congress, Washington, d.l. 
In making up lists of newspapers for 16 J 4 . we hope 
our farmer-friend, will not overlook that old stand¬ 
by,” Thk RURAL Nbw-Yorkru, founded and stm 
conducted by D. D. T. Moore. New York. No better 
Journal of Ita class Is published anywhere. Jom the 
Club now being made up at the Post-Office, at otuy 
$L15 a year .—Lpont Republican. 
