vWN" 
PATENT. 
MATERIALS 
A  GENERAL 
HOW  HE  WAS  GOING  TO  THE  CENTEN 
NIAL. 
Thohe  colored  roBideuts  of  Raleigh  who  were 
talkiiig  of  an  excurnion  to  the  Oeutemiial  have 
about  given  up  the  Hubject.  Th«!  idea  originated 
with  a  gray-haired  “uncle”  who  didn’t  ex|>ect 
to  Uvo  another  hundred  years,  and  who,  it 
turned  out,  had  a  private  ax  to  grind.  He 
planned  the  excuTHion  on  the  co-operative  prin¬ 
ciple.  IV)  a  crowd  of  hia  frioiids  he  explained : 
“  I  reckon  de  expenses  at  $.'50.  Fifty  of  u« 
will  frow  in  iSl  each,  an'  I  wll  go  down  thar. 
When  I  git  hack  we  will  frow  in  another  dollar 
aroun’,  and  de  next  man  kin  go,  an’  we’ll  keep 
the  system  goin’  till  de  hull  caboodle  hoz  been 
down  thar.” 
The  idea  took  at  once  and  was  freely  talked 
over,  but  was  knocked  in  the  head  at  a  second 
meeting  by  a  brother  asking  : 
“  Uncle  Ike,  how  long  does  you  expect  to  be 
gone  ?" 
“  Only  two  woeks,"  he  replied  ;  “  each  one 
will  be  gone  Just  two  weeks.” 
“  If  dar’s  flfty  of  us  an’  each  one  is  gone  two 
weeks,  what  part  of  de  show  will  de  last  man 
see  ?”  was  the  blunt  query. 
Uncle  Iko  tried  to  convince  them  that  dates 
and  figures  wore  made  for  mere  coiivonionce 
sake,  but  the  crowd  thinned  out  so  rapidly  that 
ho  was  soon  left  alone.  When  be  had  soon  the 
last  man  turn  the  comer,  he  sighed  a  sad  sigh 
and  muttered  .- 
“  I  guess  m  have  to  go  widout  dat  razor  for 
another  year.  Dose  hero  niggers  seem  like  dey 
hadn’t  any  genius.”— /iaidpk  SmUinel. 
with 
$26  Weekly  Indemnity  for  Disabling  Injury, 
in  the 
Of  Hartford,  Conn., 
Costa  a  Merchant,  Banker,  Professional  Man,  Clerk. 
Teacher,  or  one  In  any  similar  occupation, 
ONLY  825  A  YEAR 
For  Farmers.  Mechanics,  Traveling  Aaunts,  and 
other  ououpatiouH  not  speuially  huxiirdous. 
Kvory  man.  traveling  or  not.  should  have  a 
I'rarip  AccuUnt  Polleu  In 
THE  TRAVELERS 
‘25,000  Accident  Claims  have  been  paid, 
amounting  to 
1^2,420,000. 
Any  Agent  will  write  Policy  at  short  notice. 
JAS.  «i.  BATTKIISON,  President 
RODNEY  DENNIS.  Secretary. 
New  York  Office,  207  Broadway. 
Boston  Office,  221  Washington  St. 
A.  i»Ertrr  youth. 
jFMo— “Do  you  like  grammar,  8am?”  ^Jaru— “Don’t  know,  Ella,  never  tasted  it.” 
BELL  TREBLE  PIANOS 
SPARKS  AND  SPLINTERS, 
Centennial  lUastrated  Description,  Terms, 
&c.,  Mailed  Free. 
The  oysUir  soasou  opens.  'Raw — ’raw — ’raw. 
A  drapek’h  shop  at  Paris,  one  of  whose  clerks 
.swallowed  a  table  fork  two  years  ago  now  in¬ 
cludes  the  history  of  its  successful  extraction  in 
its  large  posting  advertisements.  Purchasers 
can  view  the  fork  and  the  clerk,  and  on  depart¬ 
ing  ai-e  presoutod  with  a  bouquet  of  tiolets. 
Art  received  rather  an  awkward  criticism 
from  a  free-and-easy  young  man  who  reoentlj' 
met  a  sculptor  lu  a  social  circle,  and  addrosseS 
him  thus ; — “  Er — er — so  you  are  the  man — er — 
that  makes — cr — mud  heads  ?”  And  this  was 
the  artist’s  reply: — “Er — er — not  all  of  ’em;  I 
didn’t  make  yoiu’s.” 
A  New  JEnsKV  street  car  man  wrote  to  his 
sweetheart :  “  I  don’t  care  mutch  what  I  do, 
you  seem  to  feel  stuck  up  above  a  hoss-car 
driver ;  if  my  hands  is  largo  my  hart  is  too.  I 
waut  yor  to  uiiderstaud  that  it  is  easy  ter  cry 
tears,  but  at  the  same  time  yer  hart  may  he 
tufforu  a  bollsti’ap.” 
An  old  Baptist  minister  enforced  the  necessity 
of  differences  of  opinion  by  argument :  “  Now, 
if  everybody  had  been  of  my  opinion,  they  would 
all  have  wanted  my  old  woman.”  One  of  tlio 
deacons,  who  sat  just  behind  him,  responded : 
“  Yes;  au  i  if  everybody  was  of  my  opinion,  no¬ 
body  would  have  her.” 
He  was  a  very  young  man.  A  few  stray  hairs 
upon  his  lip  attested  tlie  fact  that  ho  was 
engaged  in  a  deadly  struggle  with  a  mustache. 
He  went  into  a  variety  store  on  Main  street,  and 
said  to  the  proprietor  : — “  Have  you  Charles 
Reade’s  ‘Lost  Heir?’”  “No,  I  haven’t,"  re¬ 
plied  the  storekeeper.  “But,”  he  continued, 
looking  into  the  young  man’s  face,  “  I’ve  got 
Bometliing  that  will  make  that  mustache  of  yoims 
start  out  like  boils  in  spring  time." 
THE  HUBBEH  PAINT 
_  _  _  IS  THE 
BEST  PAINT  IN  THE  WORLD. 
Thore  la  no  Paint  munufnciurod  that  will  realst  water  equal  to  it.  It  la  Smooth, 
Olosay,  Durable,  Klaatio,  Beautiful  and  Kounomleul ;  and  of  any  aUado  from 
PURE  WHITE  to  .Tier  BLACK  {  and  us  ovideuoe  Of  lia  being  the  BKS'I  PAINI 
the  uecesaliy  of  their  eatubllalilng  the  following  Branch  Factories  will  abun¬ 
dantly  testify. 
BRANCH  FACTORZES: 
500  West  St.,  New  York.  8.8  West  Vun  llnreii  8t.,  Chicago,  111. 
21U  8.  Third  iSt..  Ht.  Liiuia,  >lo.|  and  u  XVholcsnIe  Jlcpot  at  Wm. 
King  <fc  Bro.,  No.  2  North  l.lliarty  Hi.,  Kuitliiiure,  Md. 
Samole  Oard  and  numerous  Testimonials  sent  FREE  on  application. 
This  Is  n  com bluation  of  capitalists  to  supply  the 
consumers  of  Tea.-,  throughout  the  United  States  on 
the  mutual  prinoiplci. 
Wu  HXiHtrl  every  consumer  of  Teas  to  render  us  all 
tliii  UKHlstiince  they  can  lu  carrying  out  our  enter- 
prlscjiR  wu  niiikea  Hpodalty  of  SUPPLYING  CON¬ 
SUMERS  ONLY,  land  allow  no  nilddlomon  pi  make 
any  profit  on  our  Importations,)  which  will  enable  us 
tosuDply  them  wllh  Teas  at  prices  lOYirerihun  have 
ever  been  knowu,  and  of  those  fine  qualities  that 
seldom  reach  the  interior,  bolng  sold  only  in  large 
cities  and  among  the  very  woultliy. 
SKNH  h'OH  PHIVE  UST. 
(OjVSUMEltS  BlPORTII^li  TEA  PO. 
No.  8  Church  Street, 
P.  O.  Box  5509.  NEW  YORK  CITY. 
SOLIC  MAXUrACTl'HlinS, 
Porter  Blanchard’s  Sons, 
(Send  for  Circulars.]  CONCORD,  N.  H. 
.Sample  churns  sent  to  towns  where  we  have  no 
Agents,  on  receipt  of  25  per  cent,  less  than  om- 
retail  price. 
AsbestOH  Uoofiiig,  for  ste^ 
t  Roofs. 
Asbestos  R  out'  (.iimiing,  for  Leaky  Roofs, 
.tsbfsios  L'eineni,  for  repulrinU  Leaks  on  Roofs. 
Aabealon  Uuiil  1‘nilit,  for  Tin  Roofs,  .'^C. 
AsbeMion  Piilntn-ail  colnrs-rouily  for  use. 
AHbealos  Fire  Froef  Contlug.  for  wood  work. 
Aabeaios  DoUcr  t<ud  Hieuiii  Pipe  fiuvurlugs. 
Asbt'Htus  Hteuin  Fucking,  flat  A  round,  all  sizes. 
Kooting  Hbeuiliing.  Ready  for  use,  and 
oasll  V  applied.  Soud  for  Paniphtots,  Price-Lists,  Ac. 
H.  W.  JOHNS,  87  Maiden  Lane,  N.  Y. 
PaUntee  and  Manufacturer.  iJstaWlslied  1868. 
CLINES’  SLATE  RiiOFING  PAINT  IS  THE  BEST 
RURAL  RATES  REDUCED! 
IN  announcing  the  reduction  of  the  subscription  price  for  The  Rural  New-Yorker,  we  can  only 
say  that  it  is  done  In  a  spirit  of  justice  to  all  our  subscribers,  who  are  now  paying  reduced  prices  for 
everything.  The  old  price  for  The  Rural  has  been  |2.65  per  annum,  and  the 
Present  Reduced  Rate  is  S2.50  per  Annum^ 
and  In  clubs  of  ten  or  more,  $2. 
Great  encouragement  has  been  given  us  in  our  efl'orts  to  make  the 
iMPAIGN  TILDEN  »nJ  HAYES,  aaxCH 
Ssm|ilv  "Oliy.  by  msil/f.tl Lsrire 
uuuu  to  AgcuU.  }.  H.  UUyyORD'SkO.VS,  BOSTON,  .MA.sS. 
Correspondence  Invited.  Agents  ITanled, 
AT  WHOLESALE  PHRES 
In  Lots  to  Suit  Customers. 
SPECIAL  TERMS  TO  CLUB,  ORGANIZERS 
and  those  who  devote  whole  or  part  Of  time 
in  selling  our  goods. 
SEND  FOR  NEW  PRICE-LIST. 
THE  GREAT  AMERICAN  TEA  COMP’Y, 
(P.  O.  Box  SOtl.)  31  and  88  Vesey  St.,  New  York. 
BEST  ILLUSTRATED 
Agricultural  and  Family  Weekly 
IF/ii/  not  mahe  your  Roofs  Just  a  lifetime,  and  save 
the  expense  irf  a  new  roof  every  10  or  15  years.  It 
Cfiii  hr  (Jour.- If  you  Use  Slate  Faint,  It  will  not  only 
resist  the  effi  ots  of  water  mul  wind,  but  shield  you 
from  Fire. 
Froleot  your  h?mi{iig*Slate  Paint,  Which 
ueilher  cracks  In  w  Inter  nor  runs  in  summer.  Old 
shingle  roofs  cau  bo  painied  looking  ni,nch  bettor, 
and  I'istini/  longer  thiiii  new  shingles  without  the 
paint,  for  unr-iourth  ihe  cost  of  rc-shiugiing.  On  de- 
tayea  shingles  It  fiUi,  up  the  holn»  and  pr.res,  and  gives 
It  now  sabstantM  mof  that  last*  for  years.  Curled  or 
warped  shine  jus  ii  hrliigK  to  th  sir  places  and  keeps 
tnern  there,  riiis  paint  requires  no  heatlug, Is  applied 
With  a  prusji,  and  very  ornamental,  li  is  cluicolate 
color  wnun  first  applied,  lint  changes  to  u  uniform 
hlatu  Color,  and  K  to  all  intonis  and  purposes  slate. 
.1,  J  Tm.OR  IRON  ROOF8 
the  rrd  color  Is  the  Dm  paint  In  Mio  world  for  dura- 
bimy.  It  has  a  huu  vy  body,  is  easily  applied,  expands 
by  neat,  contracts  by  cold,  arles  slow  and  never  cracks 
nor  scales.  One  rout  equals  4  of  unv  other. 
KOO  fire-proof  new  roofs. 
Mills,  fouiiilrios,  rarioileh  uiui  dwellings asneclrtltji. 
'Materials  complf  te  for  a  new  sioup  or  fiat  lloof  of 
Ruobrr  Rooting  cost  but  ub.iiit  kalr  the  price  iil  re- 
sliiiigling.  For  Itrlvate  li,,iuscs,  barns  and  buildings 
of  all  doscripiions  II  IS  tar  siiporior  to  any  other  roof¬ 
ing  in  the  world  lor  convenience  lu  laying,  and  com¬ 
bines  the  ornamental  appearaiicu,  duruMlttu  and  fire¬ 
proof  qualities  of  fin,  at  one-third  the  cost.  No  Tiir 
or  firuTcl  r»etl. 
•'  Uow  to  suet  re-slilngllng— stop  leaks  efTectuallr 
and  chennl_y  lu  mots  of  nil  kinds, 1  OO-puge  book 
tree.  Write  lo-dity  t  mention  Rural  S.-Y. 
NEW  YORK  STATE  ROOFING  GO.,  LIMITED, 
Roofing  Contractors,  8  Cedar  St.,  N.  Y. 
ever  published,  and  we  make.  In  this  Centenary  Year,  this  substantial  acknowledgment  of  It.  It  now 
oosts  us  less  to  make  the  paper,  and  wo  propose  to  give  our  subsorlbers  the  benefit  of  every  oent  of 
the  reduced  ooat. 
The  American 
Is  that  each  subscriber  and  agent  will  continue  his  eflorts  to  Increase  our  list  so  that  we  can  make  a 
still  further  reduction. 
The  cheapest  paper  Is  not  always  the  best,  but 
will  grind  more  Cider  from  the  same  weight  of  apples 
than  any  other  mill  In  the  world.  Send  for  Circulars. 
ABBOTT,  BIIEW  A:  CO., 
Cleveland.  Ohio. 
The  Best  Paper  is  Always  the  Cheapest ! 
%/  I  |\|  C  /N  M  ry  How  made  In  10  hours  from 
w  •  I  ■  "  «  l«  ■  Cider,  Wine  or  Sorghum 
without  using  drugs.  Name  paper  and  address 
F.  1.  SAGE,  Springfield,  Mass. 
Subscribers,  show  The  Rural  to  your  neighbors  and  ask  them  to  subsorlbe^ 
and  you  will  be  profited. 
They  will  be  benefited 
ALL  AGENTS  ATTENTION!!! 
Increase  your  lists  at  the  reduced  rates  and  get  larger  Premiums. 
One  and  all  send  Postal  Card  for  Specimen  Copy  and  Premium  List,  which  wUl  be  sent  free. 
Address 
RURAL  PUBLISHING  CO., 
78  Duane  St.,  New  York 
n  O  sou  a  day  sure  mode  by  Agents  selling  our 
I  U  ^  /n  Chroinos,  Crayo us.  Picture  it  Chromo 
■  ■  II  C’-ords.  125  ^aqJPle«,  worth  $5,  sent, 
lOBtjpald,  for  85  Cents.  Illuerrated  Catalogue  free. 
®  END  TO  JAMES  BRAYLEV,  BurrAU),  N.  Y..  for  DMCripllve 
^  Price  List  of  BuiTelo  PitU  Tartehen  mud  Horse  Powers. 
