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H.W.JOHNS 
PATENT. 
MATERIALS 
A  GENERAL 
AN  EFFECT  OF  ASTONISHMENT 
He  walked  into  the  drug  store,  says  the  New 
Orleans  Bulletin,  and  aald,  “Gimme  a  glass  of 
that  Hody."  “  What  sirup  will  you  have?"  aslmd 
the  boy.  “Soornp!  1  don't  want  Beernp;  I 
want  Hody!"  The  boy  placet!  the  glass  under 
the  faucet  and  turned  on  the  soda  water  full 
bead.  As  it  struck  the  glass  with  a  hissing  noise 
the  stranger  said,  “Gosh  all  Jcmsalem!  what's 
tlmt  ?”  and  starting  backward,  fell  over  a  stool, 
and  as  he  tried  to  get  up,  he  bruslied  against  a 
perfumery  stand,  which  causeti  a  bottle  to  fall 
olT  and  strike  him  on  the  back  of  the  huad.  At 
the  same  time  the  boy,  thinking  something  very 
serions  hiwl  happeiKtd,  dropt->od  the  glass  on  the 
marble  connbtr,  lireaWng  It  into  a9  pieces,  Tlio 
f  fortunate  stiangor,  with  his  hand  to  the  brmk 
his  head  and  his  eyes  protmding  with  fright, 
started  for  the  street  at  a  speed  of  20  miles  an 
hour  and  ran  plump  into  the  arms  of  a  police¬ 
man,  who  collared  him  and,  crushing  him  up 
against  the  wall  of  a  house,  said, 
with 
*25  Weekly  Indemnity  for  Disabling  Injury, 
in  iho 
Of  Hartford,  Conn., 
Costs  *  Merchant,  Hanker.  Prf.few.ional  Man,  Clerk, 
T  oachcr,  or  one  In  any  simtlur  uccup.ition, 
ONLY  S25  A  YEAR 
For  Farmers,  Mechanics,  Travellnn 
other  occotNitions  not  specially  hi 
I  A  cents,  and 
lasarduus. 
,  “  What’s  the 
matter  ?”  “  Matter  I”  echoed  the  thoroughly  af¬ 
frighted  stranger,  “why,  the  drug  store  has  ex¬ 
ploded  and  I'm  the  only  one  saved 
Every  man.  traveling  or  not,  should  have 
Yearly  AccMlent  Policy  In 
THE  TRAVELERS 
SPARKS  AND  SPLINTERS, 
iiS.OOO  Accident  Claims  have  been  paid 
amounting  to 
$3,420,000. 
Any  Agent  will  write  Policy  nt  short  notice. 
The  mite  that  requires  the  most  room  when 
excited  is  Dynamite. 
The  most  sublime  illustration  of  confidence  in 
your  fellow-man  is  going  into  a  restaurant  and 
ordering  hash. 
Neahly  all  the  post-oftices  in  Texas  are  in 
charge  of  females.  It  works  so  well  that  the 
males  now  arrive  and  depart  every  hour  in  the 
day, 
“  Oh  !  my  dear,  how  came  you  to  be  so  >vet  ?" 
inquired  an  affectionate  mother  of  her  son. 
Why,  ma,  one  of  the  boys  said  I  daren’t  jump 
into  the  creek,  and,  1  tell  you,  I  ain’t  to  bo 
dared  1” 
“  Some  can  bathe,"  says  Mrs.  Partington, 
“  with  perfect  impurity  in  water  as  cold  as 
Greenland’s  icy  mountains  and  India’s  coral 
strands,  but  for  my  part  I  prefer  to  have  the 
water  a  little  torpid." 
The  sight  of  a  lioarso  driven  through  one  of 
the  streets  in  Burlington,  Vt.,  lately,  with  a  half 
bushel  of  oucumhors  on  top  was  jjainfulJy  sug¬ 
gestive.  It  is  but  seldom  that  so  striking  an  ex¬ 
ample  of  cause  and  elTeot  is  seen. 
The  baby  was  doubled  up  with  the  cramps  and 
yelling  at  the  rate  of  a  nule  a  minute,  as  the 
father  and  mother  stood  over  the  crib  with  the 
laudanum  bottle  between  them.  “  No,  Marlar," 
ho  said,  gently  but  firmly,  “you  pour  it  (mtj 
that  cliild  is  growing  so  like  your  mother  that  I 
can’t  trust  myself.” 
JAS.  f, 
UAXTKICNON,  PrealdCMt 
UODNEY  DENNIS,  tkjcretary. 
^ew  York  Office.  207  Broadway. 
_  Boston  Office,  221  Washington  St. 
BELL  TREBLE  PIANOS 
The  American 
Centennial  Illustrated  Description,  Tonus, 
&c.,  Mailed  Free. 
The  Bargest  and  most  Complete  .*^iock  of 
Trees  In  the  C.  H. 
sent  u>*  follows  i  No.  1, 
rulw,  with  colored  pinto,  13  ctn.;  plnlu,  10  cts. 
o.  2,  firnntneiitui  Trees,  etc.,  with  elate.  29  nt». 
uV  W/uilosale,  and  No.  0, 
Utof  Sew  Krtu'a  Addrofla 
will  grind  more  Cider  from  the  sumo  weight  of  apples 
than  any  other  mill  In  the  world.  Send  for  Ctrculars. 
ABBOTT,  BKEW  Jk  CO., 
Clevelaud.  Ohio. 
Koebester,  N.Y, 
campaign: 
TILDeN*n,IHAYES, 
JiyoRD's  Hons,  iio.ston 
BEST  PAINT  IN  THE  WORLD 
rherela  no  1‘atnt  manufuuturod  that  will  rsnlnt  water  equal  toU.  Itl*  Smooth 
oiM.  Beautiful  and  Kconomloul ;  nnd  of  any  nhndo  fron 
I  Uttl.  W  H 11 K  to  .)  KT  BLACK  ;  and  as  evidence  of  fu  being  the  BEST  PAIN! 
the  neoesNlty  of  their  estabUshlng  the  following  Branch  Fuolorlos  will  abun. 
unntly  testify, 
BRANCH  FACTORIES: 
:V*!!  r*:’  ^nn  Hareu  Ht.,  Chicago,  III, 
AI O  .  .  flilrd  M|„  Ht.  I.ouis,  Mo. I  and  a  Wliolenule  Depot  at  Win. 
King  &  Bro.,  No.  2  North  JAberty  Ht.,  Baltimore,  Md. 
SamoleOard  and  nnmerotis  Testimonials  sent  FREE  on  application. 
_  Warranted  7  Y'ears. 
MACKIEi&BCO.,IRochester,  N.  Y 
Corrospondeuce  Invited.  Agents  TYanUd. 
H  Those  are  the  best 
and  most  economical 
goods;  Impervious  to 
IV  aampness,  bent  and 
cold-  Hi'od  for  sain- 
f  pies  to  B,  E.  HALE 
»  i  CO.,  60  and  68  Park 
N  Blace,  New  York. 
IFftl/  not  ftMke  your  Ifoo/*  last  a  lifetime,  and  save 
the  expense  of  a  new  roof  every  itf  or  1.'.  years.  It 
can  be  dune;  If  you  use  Slate  I’alnt,  It  will  not  only 
resist  the  effects  of  water  and  wind,  but  slileld  you 
from  File. 
..  OLD  ROOFS. 
I  rotnot  yoUr  BnlTdiiigs  by  using  Slate  Paint,  which 
neiiliur  cractai  In  winter  nor  runs  In  sunuuer.  Old 
shingle  niufs  cun  bo  puInleU  looking  muck  better, 
and  bistuiy  lanyer  than  ruiv  shingles  without  the 
UHiiit,  for  (itie-fuuflh  ihe  cost  or  re-slilngliug.  On  de¬ 
cayed  sklufft/'e  It  fills  up  the  holes  and  pores,  and  gives 
a  neiv  eubstantlal  roof  that  lasts  furyears  iherledOT 
ivarpeU  shuiglps  It  brings  to  Uislr  pluros  ami  keeps 
thejii  there.  Tilts  paint  requires  no  heating, Is  applied 
with  a  brush,  nud  very  ornamental.  |i.  Is  etunulaU 
color  wlien  first  applied,  but  changes  to  a  uniform 
slate  coUib  and  is  to  all  intents  and  purposes  slate, 
.V  PN  TIN  OR  IRON  ROOFS 
the  red  oolnr  la  the  best  paint  In  the  world  for  dura¬ 
bility.  It  hiis  a  fuiavy  body,  Is  easily  applied,  expands 
by  biait,  onntrindH  liy  cold,  dries  slow  and  never  cracks 
nor  sciilcie.  One  coat  euuiUs  -I  of  any  otlier. 
«.,1  fire-proof  new  roofs. 
Mills,  T<iuiidries.  fnelorlfts  and  dwenings  usprcfult]/. 
Miiterliils  cumplele  for  a  new  steep  or  Hut  Hoof  of 
Hubher  llooilng  cost  hut  about  /nil/  Ilia  price  of  re- 
snliiglliig.  For  Private  lioiises,  barns  anil  bulldiiiga 
of  all  dnsc.rlptiniiH  It  is  tarsuporior  to  any  other  roof¬ 
ing  in  I  lie  world  for  Convenience  in  laying,  and  eom- 
blnes  I  lie  urimwctifo/  uppoarunco.dltrrtbtltti/  and  Itre- 
proof  qiialllles  of  fni,  at  mui-f/ttrd  the  cost.  No  Tor 
or  Gruvcl  Used. 
••How  to  sane,  re-ehlngllng— j/oji  leaks  effeofually 
and  choniily  In  roofs  of  all  kinds, a  1  OO-page  book 
free.  Write  lo-dnyi  inuntloii  Riiiia.lN.-1. 
NEW  YORK  STATE  ROOFING  CD.,  LIMITED, 
Roollng  Contractors,  N  Cedar  St.,  N.  Y. 
AnbesloH  Hoofing,  for  steep  or iliit  Hoofs. 
AnbeaioM  If  oof  Coating,  for  nil  J.eaky  Roofs. 
Asbestos  CenieiiL.  fur  repairing  Leaks  on  Roofs. 
Asbr-stos  Ko.ol  Piiiiit,  for  Tin  Roofs,  Ac. 
Asbestos  PtiiulN  -  all  c dors— ready  for  use. 
Asbestos  Fite  Proof  Coiuing.  for  wood  work. 
Asbestos  Boiler  anil  Hienm  TMbo  Coverlugs. 
Asbestos  Nit’um  Packing,  Mat  A  round,  all  sires. 
Uoofliig  8beutbing,  Ready  for  use,  and 
easily  applied.  Wend  fnr  Pamphlets.  Price-Lists,  &c 
RURAL  RATES  REDUCED! 
Fuef.-giffoub'h  mwingino 
Jk  iW*  A  A  ■  m  m  M 
In  announcing  the  reduction  of  the  subscription  price  for  The  Rural  Nei 
say  that  It  Is  done  In  n  spirit  of  Justice  to  all  our  subscribers,  who  are  now  pii 
everything.  The  old  price  for  The  Rural  has  been  $2.65  per  annum,  and  the 
CATTLE  STANCHIONS, 
Self-closing,  Bolf-fastonlng.  One  farm  right  /me 
each  town  to  the  Hrst  applloiint.  Otve  name  of  Ueu 
county  t>t*ite.  For  Illustrated  Ouscrlptivu  Clrc 
lar  and  Deed,  send  26  cents  to 
W.  C.  GIFFORD,  Jamestown,  N.  V, 
Present  Reduced  Rate  is  $2.50  per  Annum^ 
and  in  clubs  of  ten  or  more,  $2. 
Great  encouragement  has  been  given  us  In  our  efforts  to  make  the 
BEST  ILLUSTRATED 
Agricultural  and  Family  Weekly 
AT  WHOLESALE  FKIOES 
In  Lots  to  Suit  Customers. 
SPECIAL  TERMS  TO  CLUB,  ORGANIZERS 
and  those  who  devote  whole  or  part  of  time 
In  selling  our  goods. 
SEND  FOR  NEW  PRICE-LIST. 
THE  GREAT  AMERICAN  TEA  COMP’Y, 
(P.  0.  Box  5043.)  31  and  38  Vesey  St.,  New  York.  ’ 
is  that  each  subscriber  and  agent  will  continue  his  efforts  to  increase  our  list  so  that  wo  can  make  a 
still  further  reduction. 
The  cheapest  paper  la  not  always  the  best,  but 
Always  the  Cheapest 
This  Is  a  oomblinitlon  of  capitalists  to  supply  the 
consumers  of  Teas  throughout  tlio  United  States  on 
the  mutual  priuctplo. 
Wo  expect  every  oonsiimeror  Tens  to  render  us  all 
tup  asslslarice  they  ran  In  carrying  out  our  enter¬ 
prise,  uh  we  make  a  speciaHy  of  SUPPLYING  CitN- 
SUMkllS  ONLY,  (and  allow  no  iiilddleiuuii  to  make 
any  piqtlt  on  our  lm|>i>rUill.ins.)whlcli  will  cualile  us 
to  Bubpl}  them  with  Teas  at  prices  iower  than  hare 
over  been  known,  nnd  of  those  tine  qualities  that 
seldom  reach  the  Interior,  being  sold  only  In  large 
cities  unci  among  Ihu  very  wealthy. 
St: XI)  run  pnioE  list. 
CONSUMERS  IilIPORTIA'Ci  TEA  CO. 
No.  8  Church  Street, 
P.  O.  Box  5509.  NEW  YORK  CITY. 
*0  MM*’®  hiadc  by  Agents  selling  our 
y  3  lAromos.  Crayons,  Pioture  &  Chrumo 
’•“'Mpies,  worth  *3,  neut, 
Cents.  IlIuBlrated  Catalogue  free. 
FFORD'S  HONS,  BOSTON,  Eslnh'd  1H30. 
Subscribers,  show  Thk  Rural  to  your  neighbors  and  ask  them  to  subscribe.  They  will  bo  beneflted 
and  you  will  be  profited. 
ALL  AGENTS  ATTENTION!!! 
jjlEND  TO  James  BRAyLF.Y,Bor»*LO,N.Y..f.>rD«crlt.ilr. 
Pric.  (.lit  of  UulfiUu  Pill.  Tbrch.r.  aud  tIorM  Puwnr.. 
Increase  your  lists  at  the  reduced  rales  and  get  larger  Premiums. 
One  and  all  send  Postal  Card  for  Specimen  Copy  and  Promt  um  List,  which  will  bo  sent  free 
Address 
RURAL  PUBLISHING  CO., 
78  Duane  St.,  New  York 
The  Itiiral  is  a  very  good  present  to  send  to  a 
friend,  and  It  pleasantly  reminds  thereclplent  of -the 
donor  fltty-two  times  a  year— this  your  fifty-three 
times.  Any  subscriber  cun  send  It  to  a  relative  or 
friend  as  a  present,  at  our  lowest  club  rate— only 
92.16,  Including  posiuge. 
I 
