and Revolvers. Illustrated Price List free. 
Great Western Gun Works , Pittsburg. Pa 
/ The oldest, largest, and most perfect manufactory in the l .s 
5? Buff At-® 
THE RURAL NEW-YORKER. 
MAY 4 
©lit anil ptmor. 
SPABKS AND SPLINTERS. 
A bkioht boy wants to know if by eating dates 
enough he tvill become an almanac. 
A handkerchief flirtation iH a very simple 
affair. It only requires two fools and two hand¬ 
kerchiefs. 
“ I say,” said a rough fellow to a fop with con¬ 
spicuous bow-legs—“I say, don’t you have to 
have your pantaloons cut with a circular saw ?” 
No wonder a ship is called “ she.” She has 
shifts, stays, an apron, hooks and eyes, pins, 
caps and ribbons, hoods, poppets, and a hus¬ 
band. 
Kansas teacher : “ Where does all your grain 
produce go to ?” Boy: “ It goes into the hop- 
per.” Teacher. “ Ilopper ? What hopper ?” 
Boy, (triumphantly) : “ Grasshopper.” 
“ Gentlemen. I introduce to you my friend, 
who isn’t as stupid as he appears to be.” In¬ 
troduced friend, with vivacity : “ That’s pre¬ 
cisely the difference between my friend and my¬ 
self.” 
Rev. Joseph Cook said that “ Darwin’s hypo¬ 
thesis of pangenesis involves several untenable 
subsidiary hypotheses.” Very few people sup¬ 
posed it was as bad as that. 
A vacuum would be the best place for a fellow 
to fall into, wouldn't it Bill ? for then, yon know, 
he wouldn’t fall against anything.” “Yes, he 
would, though,” Btontly answered Bill; “he 
would fall against bis inclination.” 
Two wealthy wood carvers iu Massachusetts 
have fouuded a home for destitute members of 
the craft. Why don’t some of our wealthy poets 
found a home for destitute poets ? This could 
be done by rooting in one or two continents.— 
Danbury JVews. 
A Boston girl fell while dancing on New Year’s 
night and broke her arm, — Exchange. Her 
brother Bhould have taken her partner out aud 
schottisch head off.—Harrisburg Telegraph. We 
have red ow a better way than that, but loss 
fatal. Hit him on the head a few time s with a 
polka.—Norristown Herald. This would doubt¬ 
less have the effect of putting a quadrillateral 
head on the poor fellow. —Oil City Derrick. 
Waltz the matter with your fellows ? Such puns 
are enough to make the strongest man in Vir¬ 
ginia reel.—Fulton Times. 
-—- 
A StiggCAiIoit to tlie Traveling Public. 
Torn lsts, emigrants and mariners find that Hos¬ 
tetler's Stomach Bitters is a medicinal safeguard 
against unhealthful Influences, upon which they 
can implicitly rely, since it prevents the effects of 
vitiated atmosphere, unaccustomed or unwhole¬ 
some diet,, ball water or other c ndlttons unfavor¬ 
able to health. On long voyages, or journeys In 
latitudes adjacent to the equator, It Is especially 
useful as a preventive of the febrile complaints 
and disorders of the stomach, liver and bowels, 
which are apt to attack natives of the temperate 
zoues sojourning or lraveling in such regions, and 
It, Is an excellent, protection against the influence 
of extreme cold, sudden changes of temperature, 
exposure to dan p or extreme fatigue. It not only 
prevents Intermit (Gut anil remittent fever, and 
other diseases or a malarial type, but eradicates 
them, a fact, which has been notorious for years 
past in North and South America, Mexico, the 
West Indies, Australia and other countries. 
NOT QUITE THE SAME THING. 
Small Child (whose favorite Aunt is “ engaged.”) “ Grandma, where is Auntie May ?” 
Grandmamma. —“ She is sitting in the Library with Captain Herbert, my dear.” 
Small Child (after a moment s thought.)—“ Grandma, couldn’t you go aud sit in the Library 
with Captain Herbert, and Auntie May come and play with me ?” 
BOOTS, SHOE S, HOSE , BELTS, ETC. 
OFFrCES AND FACTORIES: 
Cleveland, New York, Chicago, St. Louis. 
Send for circular, Etc. 
Address NAIAD OIL AND BL’K’G CO. 
The Coquillard Wagon, 
THE FARMER’S FAVORITE. 1 jm* 
These Wagons are made of the best Wood 
and Iron to be procured, and put together 
by the most experienced workmen. Every 
one warranted to give satisfaction, both in 
regard to quality of material and workman¬ 
ship. They are also noted for their light¬ 
ness of draft and ease of running. I 
Carriages, Buggies and Sleighs 
Of superior workmanship always on hand. 
Send for Circular and Price List. 
A. COQ17ILLA KI>, 
South Bend, lml. 
ROOT CROPS. 
J. M. THORBTJRN & CO. 
15 John Street, 
NEW YORK, 
For year? the largest, importers of seeds of superior 
Rootsfor cuttle tending, beg to remind their fuends 
chut their stock this seuson is unsurpassed. 
Warden Orange Globe Mangel Wurzel. 
Mammoth Prize Long Bed 
Norbiton Giant Red 
White Silesian Sugar Beet. 
Long Orange Carrot. 
Improved American Ruta Baga, &c,, &c. 
Send for our Catalogue. Reduced rates in targe 
quantities. 
!' 'j|t ^j 1 i ^ 1 ■ * tt ^ ;l 
THE TIGBH HAY RAKE 
is admitted by all to be t he Standard Self-operating 
Rake. It isuo experiment but a PROVED SL T < •CESS, 
and lias double the sale of any other Sulky Rake In 
the United States. Send for Circulars. 
J. W. STODDARD fc Co., Dayton, O. 
Sole Muiiulucturers. 
ARBOR VIT/E. 
A few thousand Arbor Vitae trees for Lawns and 
Hedges. 2 to 4 years, transplanted. 2, H. 4 and 6 feet 
high, stocky and well, furnished at f3, $4, $5 and fti 
per 100, respectively. Packing tree for cash. 
JAMES A. ROOT, Skaneateles, N. Y. 
THE AMERICAN HAY ELEVATOR. 
We beg to announce that the Rural New-Yorker issue of May lltb, 1878, and thereafter 
will be enlarged to the extent of four columns. This will bo in effect the same as issuing a 
four-page supplement every four weeks. In other words by lengthening and widening the 
columns we shall give onr readers what is equivalent to seventeen of our present pages. 
This change which involves considerable expense, we submit, is iu acoord with our reiter¬ 
ated statement that we should by every meauB in our power respond to the gratifying appre¬ 
ciation which has been extended to the present management of the Rural New-Yorker. 
We take some pride in the fact that no other family paper in this or any other country 
has during the past eight mouths, plaoed before its "readers, in its several departments, a 
higher class of writings, and offer this as an earnest of what may be counted upou for the 
rest of the year. 
The price of the Rural New-Yorker will remain, at least for the present, the same as 
heretofore. 
BEST I N THE WORLD. The Best in tie World. 
For HARNESS, CARRIAGE TOPS ReadyjUse. 
ci.x™TJ™n, 
Tlie most perfect, simple and only Elevator that 
raises the buy from wagon and carries it In barn any 
required distance. Economical, humble, labor-sav¬ 
ing. Send for Illustrated Circulate and prices to 
J. K. FlTZllUGll, 
1,'Ofl Barker 8t., Philadelphia, Pa. 
Branch Office : 50 BeeiUuau St., New York. 
FACTORIES: 
CEE I 
. v/: ir Y'o/tH, 
ST. EOVIS. 
ANY SHADE 
DESIRED. 
rs This i? a combination of 
* B 1 ffi-M fa capitalists to supply con- 
| 4 sinners only throughout 
the United Slates with 
PURE TEAS on the 
mutual principle, by getting up clubs. Send for 
New Price-List. 
CONSUMERS' IMPORTING TEA CO., 
P.O. Box 5509. No. 8 Church 8t., New York City 
STOCKS RIDGE 
MANURES 
Originated by Prof. Slockbridge, Prof. of Agriculture 
in the Massachusetts Agricultural College. 
Made for eaoli crop, furnishing the plant food 
which each requires. They have been used furtive 
years witti such success that in 1s77 they were ap¬ 
plied on over Ul.Ooo acres with excellent Insults. 
Send tor Pamphlet, Hailed Free. Also for 
sale, Agricultural Chemicals. 
W. H. BOWKER & CO., 
3 Park Place.New York. 
43 Uhiithniu fit.Bunion. 
C IDER PRESSES AND GRATERS. 
Hoombr A Boschxrt Press Co., Syracuse, N.Y 
TEAS REDUCED 
OUR TERMS ARE THE BEST. 
Send for our New Reduced Price List. 
THE GREAT AMERICAN TEA COMPAN 1 
P. O. Box 6tU3. 31 and 33 Vesey St., New York. 
Rubber Paint. Go,: Dundee, N. Y. 
Gentlemen:All of onr customers who have used 
your Paint, speak in the highest terms of Rs cover- 
mg capacity, cheapness ana beautiful glossy finish. 
We consider two coats of the Rubber Paint fully 
equal to three coats of White Lend and Oil. 
Yours truly. M. IC. BENNETT & CO. 
nr SEND FOR CIRCULAR, ETC. JE& 
KINGSFORD’S 
Oswego Starch! 
Is the BEST and MOST ECONOMICAL in the 
Wo**ld. 
Is perfectly PURE —free from acids and other 
foreign substances that injure Linen. 
Is STRONGER than any other—requiring* much 
less quantity in using*. 
Is UNIFORM—stiffens and finishes work always 
the same. 
NEW EXCELSIOR LAWN MOWER. 
RECEIVED HIGHEST AWARD AT THE CENTENNIAL EXPOSITION. 
Important Features for the Season of 1878. 
REDUCTION IN PRICE ! 
LESS WEIGHT ! LIGHTER DRAFT! 
= | And Furnished with either Wheels nr Roller. 
It has been adopted, and tain be seen in practical operation on 
the Public Park a of New York. Brooklyn, Boston. New 
tin vtn, Ulevelitml, Chicago, and on nitons! all the promi¬ 
nent City Parka iu the United Hlutes aud Canada. 
The ICXC’KF.MIO R received the PI It NT PKF.II I UBTS at 
the Great l.nwa Mower Trial* held In New York City, 
Cleveland, <)., Wavorly, N. J.j ulstint. the Grenl International 
Law a Mower Triul held ntCARLlSUS, ENGLAND, In Septem¬ 
ber lust, and at many other trials and Agricultural Fairs neld in 
iu Europe and America. 
Six sizes tor hand power; tour sizes for horse power. 
Our New Horse Mower la conceded to be the LIGHT¬ 
EST and BEST Horse Lawn Mower ever made. 
N. B.— Horse and Hand Lawn Mowers are alike guaranteed 
in every respect. Address 
OHADBORN & 00LDWELL MT'G 00.. 
Send you circular. Newburgh, N. Y. 
