umormis 
A hosgry lawyer, who was dining at a 
hotel, shovelled the food into his mouth with 
his knife till he accidentally cut his mouth > 
which was observed by a wag seated opposite, 
who bawled out, “I say Mr., don't cut that 
hole in your countenance any larger, or we 
shall starve.” 
” How are you, Brown ?’’ exclaimed Fen- 
derson. 4t I have been on a regular wild- 
goose chase, and I’m glad I found you at last.’* 
Fendersoa supposed he mu.it have said some¬ 
thing pretty smart the way the people around 
him laughe i, but he can’t for the life of him 
tell what it was. 
A traveler, being at a coffee-house with 
some gentlemen, was largely drawing on the 
credulity of the company. '‘Where did you 
say all these wonders happened, sir ?” asked a 
gentleman present.—“1 can’t exactly say,’' 
replied the traveler, “ but somewhere in Eu¬ 
rope—Russia, I think.”—“ I should rather 
think It-a ly ,” returned the other. 
A Boston man went to a doctor, and told 
him, “ D »otor, there is something the matter 
with my brain. After any severe mental ex¬ 
ertion I have headache. What is the remedy 
for it ?”—" The best remedy is to get yourself 
elected to the Legislature, where you will 
have no occasion to think." The patient re¬ 
plied if it wasn’t for the sake of his children 
he would make the experiment. He didn’t 
want them to go through life with a stigma 
attached to their names. 
Selections from the Best Animals 
in the following Celebrated 
Herds, will be Sold at the 
AMERICAN HORSE EXCHANGE, 
50th St. and Broadway, 
October 18, 1882. 
Absolutely Without Reserve, and 
Guaranteed as Represented. 
Alma Farm contributes the famous cow and 
Island Prize winner, I<ancy Fan, whose well- 
known competition with Coomassie, when ea h 
scored the same, has excited the interests of 
the Jersey world. Also, many fine nuimals 
sired by the great Atphea bull Polohitis, and 
many deep in calf to him. At the N. Y. State 
Fair, 1882, the sweepstakes Herd Premium fell 
to Alma Farm, Polonius t-iking the fust prize 
for 3-year-old bubs ami over; Fancy Fan took 
first prize for best cow. All but one of the 
Pr ize winners in the herd will be offered at 
this sale. 
rmnwriniTniiin 
OLD SONG. 
I’m sitting on this tile Mary." 
I had severe attacks of gravel and kidney 
trouble; was unable to get a medicine or doc¬ 
tor to cure me until i used Hop Bitters, and 
thev cured me in a short time —A Distin¬ 
guished Lawvkk of Waynk Co , N. Y. 
Colorless and Cold.— A young girl deep¬ 
ly regretted that she was so colorless and 
cold. Her face was too white, and her hunds 
and feet felt as though the blond did not cir¬ 
culate. After one bottle of Hop Buters had 
been taken, sbe was the rosisest and the healt - 
iest girl in the town, with a vivacity and 
cheerfulness of mind gratifying to her friends. 
— Ade, 
Mb. John D. Wing sends the superb two- 
year-old heifer Flower Girl, a daughter of 
Mr. T. H. Havkumkykk’s great ball Carlo, 
and winner of first prize at AVio York State 
Fair, Utioa, 1882, two yearling daughters of 
Farmkh'hGlouy served by a son of Farmer’s 
Glory out of a half-sister of Fancy Fan; 
Rkgina’s Glide, whose grand dam Regina 
took in succession all the Island prizes from 
calf to aged cow and who is the uam of the 
famous bull Rex, sold to the Czar ok Russia. 
The animals in this Jot are served by the 
Coomassie bull Taijcaster, first, prize Few 
York State Fair, 1882; John Rex, second 
prize, Few YoikState Fair, 1882; I olonius 
Jr. aud Alma, son ok Farmers Glory. 
Mr. Edwin Thorne will sell some very fine 
specimens from his celebrated herd tracing to 
the came foundation source as that of Jersey 
Belle ok Bcituatk; also two holding the 
blood of the remarkable <inby hull 1ST Mar¬ 
tins, whose stock should Le better known. 
Mr. Edward Burnett of Deerfool Farm, 
has consigned one fine cow and a few very 
choice young animals. The Deerfool Farm 
Herd bae been bred for nearly 80 years for 
large How of rich milk, and the Ayn-hire type 
of odder, teats of good size aud well spread. 
The average y ield has ueen morea-ed OiJOquarts 
per cow for the year during the past ten years 
aud has beaten Severn! Ayrshire herds iu the 
neighborhood. Individual tests have yielded 
10 to 1H pounds per week of tine butter ready 
for rket. 
Mu. James Stillman, of Briarclipfe 
Herd, conuibutes the well known Bull Dar 
L iNGTON, 2,4415, who Is at once half-brother 
tv Euphrates, dam of Mr. Holly's great bul 
Uj’roar and Duke of Darlington, whore 
daughters aro so remarkable in the type of 
their lainous grand num EuKOTas; two cows 
strong iu ihe Aijtiea blood, and two fine 
imported cows, one of tne iouious Kex- 
IlKOlNA family, whose remarkable butter 
performances both ou the Island and here 
are so wellkuov n. 
Mr. W. R McCready consitmi one young 
cow by the Signal bull Compo Boy, with her 
four mruths’ heifer; a young bail by Duke 
of Darlington, out of a daughter of ihe 
well-known butter cow Rkckpi ion; another 
voung bull by Fokgkt me-.Not, Farmers 
Glory’s splendid son und Prize-«inurr; also 
four heifers of great dairy promise n I par¬ 
taking of tne blood of (Jd a m pion of America- 
Europa 121, Farmers Glory, turn Newell s 
Rex. 
Mr. J. B. Morris sends two fine young 
cow s of his own breeding, one in calf to King 
K oFFtE, Coomassik’s son, and one in calf to 
Gold Coast, great grandson of Coomassie 
hiidsmof Ona Five oi Gold Coasts an¬ 
cestors to the 3rd generation hive butter 
records of 14 pounds and over. 
Frasier’s Patent 
TheOnlyPerfeciji 
Sewing'Machine 
SIMPLEST.LATEST IMPROVED. 
MOST DURABLE R 
j A Light, Safe, Easy Riding, 
Two-wheeled Road Vehicle 
/ Graceful in Proportion, 
Strong and Well Finished 
THREE STYLES, 
Five Sizes and Weights 
BRADLEY & COMPANY, 
SYRACUSE, N. Y. 
AND MAKE HOME 
AND MAKE HOME 
' Jr* C-~ . J*TT0t,S.^S5 
k30 Union Square. N Y Chicago ill. 
OKAMCL M««. OU ATLANTA fiA. 
tzr Send for Illustrated Circular and Price-lust 
VETERAN CORN SHELLER and ONE HORSE POWER 
22 )4 Revolutions of Tumbling Rod to one round 
___ of Horse. 
capacity of 
jfSSM/ SHELLER 
^§Hm / 30 bushels pr hour. 
PKE^SKi. GUATKItS, KI.KVATOHM Pumps 
Evaporators, «<•.. .4c. E*r S,-ud for ( atalogue "B.’ 
HOIMIKK «V HO>CilKKT Press t o.. 
Syracuse, N. Y. 
New York City Oftlee. 62 Vesey St 
PAYNE'S FARM ENGINES 
Power suited for Running 
Churns, Pumps and all light farm work. 
CT Write for Circulars. Address 
SANDWICH MANUFACTURING CO., SandwIcA. Ill. 
MAHER & GROSH’SCOMMON-SENSE KNIFE 
Contains Pruning blade, Jack knife blade, and 
Budding or Sprying blade. Cut Rives exact size. 
‘ Blades carefullv forced from razorsteel file test 
1 >d, and ur placed riiKK If soft or flawy. Price 
» gi.uu, po't-oald . or without the budding 
blade. 7ft rents : with Just large and 
KinaJI binder, V) cenls; extiu strong 
2 blade, for bard Service. Tr.ets: “ Onr 
iie«t" oil-tempered Primer. 
*!.0i: Budding knife. 63 ct*.; 
/ ' J Pruning Shears, $1.00 
■ ■:IU.W j.1 Illustrated list free: also 
•llow to Use a Razor’ 
31A11 i<:k & 
—J GKOS 11 , 
T‘a6eul spark arresting Far’* aud Dairy Engines of 
II sizes I nun ’’ to 12 lmrse-po wer mourned or uu- 
lounted " nrra"»' il t • be ihe B* st mid Cheapest 
spines made. Prices fro n 8150 upwards, Send 
>r lllust aied Catalogue i*A,” which will give you 
ill Information and ■ rle 8 to 
B. W. I'AYNF, & SON, 
Box 841. CorniiiB. N. 1 ■ 
The Belle City 
ENSILAGE and 
FEED CUITER 
30 ITIonroe St 
TOLEDO, OHIO. 
It has no equal forgood,rapid 
work »nd ourablliiy. Con be 
un by wind power It suits 
every time. Semi for circular 
and name ibis paper. 
IJAVIB I.AWTtlN 
ltncine. Wis. 
Mr. 8. M. Burnham contributes one in- 
bred great-grand-daughter of Coomassie, 
who is the finest specimen of the shain ever 
offered at public auction; a half sieter of the 
above deen in calf to Count Sir Gkorge 
a sou of Sir George who will, wh n fresh ,ap¬ 
proach her sister. A fine young imported cow 
just calved sired bv Victor au Island Prize¬ 
winner in 1877, 1878, 7'J. 
THE VICTORY 
CORN MILL 
Delivered and Set in Satisfactory Order. 
Manufacturers of Iron-lever Scales say * Osgood's wood levers are humbugs, not worth buying or trying. 
I nnn II fill TOT Ilf* II IN 82 STATES, have proved them durlug the past five years, and old 
,000 HONEST MEN 
Where we have no Agents our Scales are SENT ON TRIAL , hHEIGHT PAID , and 
A SPECIAL, DISCOUNT MADE, 
t£T FOR ILLUSTRATED CIRCULARS AND REFERENCES, Address 
The only mill that Is a 
complete MlCcem In grind¬ 
ing • oni and cob together. 
WeileLy competition ou this 
Hud of giHiding. Jt also 
grinds she hu ••mu and all 
oilier kind-of grain eoa>se 
or • lie. an deelreii. Capac¬ 
ity ten to twenty bushels iter 
hour, Keif - sharpening 
plu gh, and warranted in 
every respect. 
THOM AH KOBEUTS, 
Spring held, Ohio. 
For Particulars aud Catalogues apply to 
WM. EASTON, Manager, 
American Horse Exchange, LImlted 
Fiftieth Street aiul Broadway, 
and Seventh Avenue, New York, 
__ ..... who wish to learn Steam Engl 
TO YOU HU MEN neering, send your name with 
10 c. in stamps to F. KEPF Y, Engineer, Bridgeport, Ct. 
