808 
THE RURAL NEW-YORKER. 
NOV 20 
fimuorons. 
A dandy at a hotel table, who wanted the 
milk passed to him, thus asked for it: “Please 
send your cow this way ” To whom the land- 
lad}' re tort ed as follows: '‘Waiter, take the 
cow down to where the calf is bleating.” 
“Oh, 1 do so dote on the sea,” she gurgled. 
“If you only bad a yacht, Augustus dear! 
“I have no yacht, W ilhelniina,” he sighed, 
“but I can give you a Id tie smack.” And 
then it Bounded as if a cork bad flown out of a 
bottle 
“Then you think he struck you with malice 
aforethought?” Witness, indignantly: “You 
can't mix me up like that. 1 ve told you 
twice that he hit me with a brick. There 
wasn’t no mallets nor nothin’ of that kind 
about.” 
gttiSiccUancou?* !3Uvfrli£ing. 
ONE EXPERIENCE FROM MANY. 
I have been sink and miserable s'* )• ng and bad 
eniised niv husband »o tnui'li 1 rouble and • xpense, no 
one seenmd «r, know wlmt idled me, thm r wasoom 
nletr y dl heartened and iiHonur ged. InthlsTraine 
of mind I trot « bottle of Hop Bitter* and used them 
unknown to mv fa"<ily. I •‘"“B te-gan lo Improve 
and gained »o f at Mint rnj till aba ml and family 
thought If strange und unnnturid, but when I told 
them what h. d h* Ipeil me. they uld, Hurrah lor 
Hoi* Rifle' Ion* may they pro Mir r, for they have 
made mother well iinil u happy. ' he Mother. 
Rady I! AOTirneus. Indies, you eatinot make fair 
skin rosy cheeks, and spark one ey s with all the 
cosmetics of Kr nee nr heaatlflers ot t e 
While 111 iio-t health • owing will give vou such r ell 
blood, good health, strength and beauty as Hop Hit¬ 
ters A trial L Certain proof. 
WAITING FOR THE THANKSGIVING TURKEY 
Anxious Mother — “ I say. Bub, did you see my Tommy anywhere 1” 
Butt Yes, mam.” 
A M —“ Was he going to the butcher’s ?’ 
Bub—“He was walking so slow I couldn’t tell which way he was going.’ 
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Invalids and those who suffer from nervous, exhaust¬ 
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i h - Ele -iric itrvleiv exposes the unmitigated 
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