AUS 20 
584 
THE RURAL NEW-YORKER, 
to do so is actuated by more reasons than one; 
she did not because she did not wish to do so, 
she intended to keep her acquaintance at a 
distance, and succeeded; or, she might not 
have been aware whether she ought to or not, 
so being in doubt she laid herself open to beiug 
accused of hauteur; or, she might have for¬ 
gotten that she had not. The gentleman who 
shakes hand three, four, or five times if per¬ 
mitted, does so because he is either flurried, 
fussy, or nervous—three phases of undiscip¬ 
lined feeling which should be controlled, but 
which are often exhibited by both men and 
women. Over familiarity or obsequiousness 
are also the cause of so much undue hand- 
from the hand of an intimate friend—not a 
shake of the hand only, but a holding of the 
hand while the last words are being said? 
And who ever forgets the long firm clasp of 
the hand, which takes the place of words, 
when the heart is too full to give them utter¬ 
ance? We can almost feel it, for years after, 
as memory recalls the last time we met. 
SKETCH WRITING. 
It is often remarked by editors or mana¬ 
gers of newspapers and periodicals that the 
best articles often come in the crudest forms. 
A housewife smarting under an insult, or an 
little care and attention, flower freely all 
Winter long. _ 
The Spotted leaved Calla—Richardia alba 
maeulata—when well grown, is a very pretty 
plant, suitable for cultivation either in the 
greenhouse or window garden. In habit and 
manner of growth it bears a striking resem¬ 
blance to the common calla, although it is 
narrower and not so long, and, besides, it is 
beautifully spotted with silvery white. The 
flowers are somewhat smaller, of a creamy 
white color, w ith a purple blush in the center. 
This plant grows in the Summer only, and 
should be kept dry in ibe Wiuter. Letitremain 
in the pot until April, or until it shows signs of 
growth; then repot in a rich, moderately 
heavy soil. In repotting, drain the pot well, 
and during the plant’s season of growth wa¬ 
ter freely. After flowering, water should be 
gradually witheld. chas. e. PARNELL. 
CATALOGUES, ETC., RECEIVED. 
Bucher, Gibbs & Co.. Canton, Ohio. Illus¬ 
trated circular of the Gibbs patent imperial 
plow sulky and sulky plow. This sulky is 
adapted to the use of any plow, either right 
or left hand. It can also be employed when 
a corn cultivator or harrow is substituted in 
place of the plow, thus virtually making 
several tools in oue. Send for the circular, 
mentioning the Rural. 
Ebner & Kretz. — This is a handsome 
illustrated circular of guns, both single 
and doubled barrel, pistols, sporting goods, 
cutlery, etc. In this are cuts and descriptions 
of guns adapted to everybody's use, from the 
cheap yet efficient guD sold for only a few 
dollars to those of the finest material and 
finish, of Charles Daly’s best make, with the 
Anson it Daly action, worth among the hun¬ 
dreds. As most farmers need a good gun, we 
advise our friends to send for this catalogue 
and see what bargains are offered. Send to 
Ebner & Kretz.-ll Barclay St., N. Y. 
Report of the Botanist of the New York 
Agricultural Experiment Station for 
1SS4. By Prof. J. C. Arthur, the Botanist. 
A book full of information on the diseases 
that cause so much loss to the fruit grower. 
lUomoL 
CONDUCTED BY MISC RAY CLARK. 
SHAKING HANDS. 
The real etiquette with regard to shaking 
hands is a question that many are inclined to 
ask when they have found sometbiog to object 
to in the matter of band-shaking. A student 
of human nature might reply that, beside the 
question of etiquette, which is distinct enough 
and simple enough for all exigencies, there is 
the still weightier oue of temperament to be 
taken into account, which, in many, drives 
etiquette out of the field, if by etiquette is un¬ 
derstood not merely stiff propriety of action, 
but politeness in the truest sense of the word, 
and doing that which is exactly the right 
thing to do. Etiquette rules when to shake 
hands and wheD not to do so, when to bow 
and when not to bow, when to rise from a seat 
and when to remain seated; but in spite of 
this knowledge, which is within everybody’s 
reach, there is great offense giveu and taken 
in shaking hands. “How very odd she did 
not offer to shake hands with me!' 1 says one 
or, “He actually shook hands three times, and 
would a fourth if I had not got out of it.” re¬ 
marks another; or, “1 dislike particularly' 
shaking hands with him; there is no reason 
for the warmth he displays: I hardly know 
him.” “It ia next to impertioeut to be so 
over empress6 when shading bands,” says a 
third. “I never shake Hands with her if I can 
avoid doing so,” says a fourth; she gives one 
two fingers; it is so supercilious; I suppose 
she fancies herself too fine to shake hands 
with ordinary mortals.” “Well, anything is 
better than the limp, uncomfortable manner 
in which Mr. BrowD shakes hands wilh one,’’ 
returns another; “be is a great friend of ours, 
an old friend, but when I extend my hsud to 
him he takes it only to drop it instantly, and I 
have quite to pick it up, as it were. I wish be 
had a more pleasant way of shaking hands.” 
“Why does Mr. V. pump his friends’ arms in 
that extraordinary way wheu he shakes hands 
with them ; he mav mean to be friendly, but 
it looks verv foolish,” remarks another critic. 
“One should never wear rings when one is 
obliged to shake bands with Mr. White,” says 
someone else; “in an absent sort of manner he 
crushes your poor fingers together till you cry 
out with actual pain, the rings making weals 
in your flesh. This muscular grasp is too 
hearty to be pleasant.” 
Why do people raise these comments or be¬ 
come so chronic in their style of shaking hands 
to call them forth. The lady who gives 
offense by not shaking hands vrhen expected 
sbakiug. The geutlemen who shake bands 
with great warmth and empressment are two 
distinct individuals; the one is cordial and 
large-hearted, and has a friendly grasp for 
everyone, a grasp indicative of kindliness, 
geniality, and good fellowship; the other 
wishes to ingratiate hi • self in certain quart¬ 
ers, and loses no opportunity-of being thus de¬ 
monstrative but no one is deceived by this 
spurious imitation of the real thing. The lady 
who gives but two fingers to people whom she 
does not care about, is always a person who 
fancies herself and feels very fine; she doubt¬ 
less is, but. her good breeding and her good 
feeling are both in question when she takes 
this method of show the superiority of herself 
and her position over that of other people. 
Mr. Brown is unfortunate; bis manner of 
shaking hands is aggravating—he cannot help 
it; it arises from nervousness; there is some¬ 
thing wanting in him somehow, atidhis friends 
are aware of it: probably his whole life is as 
limp as his shake of the hand. Mr. V, is a rough, 
unpolished, awkward sort of man; he does 
everythingawkwardly; he pumps the arm. be 
cause he does not know how to shake the hand. 
Mr , White is an inconsiderate man; he forgets 
that ladies’ bauds are soft and tender, and that 
rings hurt very' much, and that he is notshak- 
ing hands with a comrade just returned from 
India whom he has not seen for years. There 
are other eccentricities indulged in by differ¬ 
ent people when shaking hands; and there 
are, as we have said, people who shake hands 
when they should not, and people who do not 
when they should. This brings us again to 
the etiquette side of the question and queries 
as to the right thing to do under certain cir¬ 
cumstances. 
“I wonder if I ought to have shaken hands 
with her when I was introduced to her?” in¬ 
quires a lady' of her friend, whom she regards 
as a fountain of knowledge; “I half put out 
my band, but drew it back again, as I was not 
quite sure whether she meant to shake hands 
with me.” “It entirely depends upon who 
you are introduced to." returns her friend, 
who is well up in the manners and tone of 
good society, “as to whether you shake hands 
or not” Yon would not ou being casually in¬ 
troduced to a person altogether a stranger to 
you,there however are so many occasions wheu 
it is both proper and correct to do so on first 
being introduced, that the rule on this head is 
a very elastic one. 
“Ought a lady or gentleman to be the first 
to extend the hand?” is a further inquiry. 
“The lady usually takes the initiative,” is the 
answer, as she does with regard to bowing; 
but in reality it is a spontuueous movement 
made by both at the same moment, as the 
band ought not to be extended or the bow 
giveu unless expected and instantaneously re¬ 
ciprocated. But having once shaken Lauds 
with a person, you are of course at liberty to 
repeat the civility whenever you may happen 
to meet, unless a decided coolness of inauner 
warns you that a buw would be more accept¬ 
able. Shaking hands on taking leave is a 
graceful aud pleasant fashion of saying good¬ 
bye. Who has not felt the kiudly pressure 
injustice, sits down, aud with a pencil or an 
old peu and using bluing for ink, writes an 
eloquent ple» for her sex: or the farmer in his 
shirt sleeves improves bis nooning by writing 
an article based upon bis morning experience, 
and they are not only accepted gladly by the 
agricultural paper, but are copied widely by 
its exchanges. 
Readers haven’t the time to go over long 
articles, no matter how beautiful or gramma¬ 
tical the language, unless they are full of 
truth, fairly' running over with new facts. 
Those articles please us best and have the 
highest value to us, perhaps are alone of value, 
which a man or a woman does not go out of 
their way to do, but which comes to them 
from their everyday level, with all the home¬ 
ly' aud real facts of their living. This is one 
of the secrets of the best books, sketches and 
poems aud makes the difference between those 
works that flavor of character and those that 
are the result mainly of learning or concious 
literary effort. The farther an artist or an 
author goes away from home for a theme the 
easier we can dispense with him. Don’t think 
that you must go away for a subject— 
that you must study Petrach or Cicero 
in order to find oue for the Rural. 
There is material enough for a whole volume, 
an enevclopedia within a mile of your home. 
The real want of this age of literature aud 
art is strong, conscientious personalities. 
Out of what else can we truly write but 
out of our own hearts? Of course, if you 
do not come in contact with the actual 
world, only through the medium of books, 
you will find your own vicinity dull and 
prozy, unprolific even of anything worthy of 
a place even in your diary. You may sigh 
for the advantages and culture of the city, but 
you can find in your own homes subjects for 
articles which would be appreciated by 
thoughtful readers. J. H. G. 
GATHERING GEAR. 
I think we were all interested in the ac¬ 
count lately given by your correspondent 
with regard to the young lady who earned 
such a fair “setting out” by her own industry 
and good management. For it was quite as 
much by the means of the latter as by the 
former that she was enabled to compass it. 
Muny a girl would have spent her two dollars 
a week on such inconsiderable trifles, that she 
would not have had comfortable clothing os 
she went along. One girl whom I employed, 
spent almost as much on confectionery every 
week, and managed as she could for clothing, 
begging of all her friends, or doing without 
when she could run in debt no longer. She 
was not a help that was desired for a very 
long term. 
Thriftiness is going so much out of fashion 
among our young people, that such an ex¬ 
ample of it Is especially pleasing and Instruc¬ 
tive. Time was when our Yankee girls began 
early to make their little hoards towards the 
distant housekeeping day, ami it was with 
pride aud pleasure they looked over their 
riches aud compared notes. “I am glad these 
days have gone by,’’ says one, “and that our 
girl’s heads are not filled with matrimonial 
preparations before they are in tbeir taeus.” 
If one could only be sure they were filled 
with something better and more sensible than 
this “accumulating of property,” it would be 
a cause for rejoicing. But the children’s par¬ 
ties, aud youthful “flirtations,” and habits of 
extravagance so general, seem a poor substi¬ 
tute, and little better calculated to produce a 
happy and prosperous future. 
It is a gooil sign for any young person to be 
in the habit of laying by, in a useful, non- 
perishable shape, little articles of property. 
Whether she marries, or not, they will be al¬ 
ways useful. Many a s’ugle woman furnishes 
her own apartment according to her own 
taste, even where she boards, aud still others 
keep house in a quiet way in a few apartments. 
Though it is a solitary way, it is liked best by 
some, and admits of economies impossible un¬ 
der any other circumstances. Every woman 
making her own living should seek to lay by 
something, either in money or useful property, 
which will always work to her advantage 
whether married or single. olive. 
PICNICS.* 
EMMA C. STOUT. 
Is it too late to get in a word on this subject? 
I hope not, for though July and August are 
the picnic months in the calendar, there are 
many days in September and some in October 
that are the ideal ones for woodland excur¬ 
sions. Let me urge farmers’ wives to have a 
few family or social picnics to look back upon 
when November’s dreary curtain falls. 
I know a lady who has an out door dinner 
every pleasant Sabbath duriDg the Summer 
aud Autumn. She lives five miles from 
church, and as the family attends regularly 
she lessens the burden of a Sunday dinner by 
preparing it on Saturday. There are five 
little folks with only the eldest girl old enough 
for waiting girl. She is very deftly trained 
in the art of packing buttered sandwiches, 
cake, fruits, the tin pall of lemons and sugar 
ready for the water to be added, and, lastly 
she tucks in a clean giugbaru apron and the 
table-cloth and their Sunday dinner is off 
their minds. By the time services are over 
the little cues are hungry, and the first lovely 
glen or shady knoll calls a halt. The horses 
are given their corn and then the pleasure of 
a woodland dinner is enjoyed after which 
books are read and the little folks practice 
their new Sabbath school songs. This lady 
says she never hus such perfect Sabbath rests 
as these out door oues. They are all better 
prepared for the week’s toil than if they went 
through the program of hot dinners aud 
unnecessary dish washing. One blessed thing 
Pi.scrllanfou.tf ^rtmlbing, 
The combination 
of the Oils and Al¬ 
kali (Soda) must 
be complete to 
form a perfect or 
true soap, such as 
will not burn the 
fibre, or redden 
and irritate the 
skin. The Ivory 
Soap is 9 pffy % 
pure,which insures 
its being perfectly 
harmless, and will 
leave the skin 
clear, white and 
velvety. 
Free of charge. A full size cake of Ivory Soap 
will be sent to any one who can not get it of their 
grocer, /f six two-cent stamps, to pay postage, are 
sent to Procter & Gamble, Cincinnati. Please 
mention his paper. 
