440 
THE RURAL (NEW-YORKER. ‘ 
JUNE 43 
j^itmxrams. 
How doth the busy little hen 
Delight to cluck, I wonder? 
To ramble o’er the onion beds 
And scratch them all to thunder. 
—Nebraska State Journal. 
Made out of whole cloth. Porous plaster. 
—Elmira Telegram. 
Merit will tell: even in strawberry baskets 
the best rise to the top.— Life. 
Pulling the wool over people’s eyes—sell¬ 
ing mutton for spring lamb.— FishkillStand¬ 
ard. 
It must be a very good brass-band that can 
play all the airs a drum-major puts on.— West 
Point Star. 
A certain lamp is advertised as having a 
forty-candle power. It ought to be a great 
go in Russia.— Puck. 
An author was recently asked for a list of 
the best hundred books. With calm courtesy 
he replied that he had not yet written quite a 
hundred.— Western Rural. 
Nature is now smiling in her rainbow 
drapery of vines and flowers. Economical 
nature, who turns her dress to suit the sea¬ 
sons as they come and go.— Puck. 
“Yes,” said the farmer as he looked rueful¬ 
ly over a cornfield that had been pillaged by 
crows, “It’s another illustration of caws and 
effect.”— Toronto Empire. 
“Oh, take me, take me away,” sings a poet 
in a Boston newspaper. Yes, take him away. 
Stand not upon the order of your taking, but 
take him at once.— Texas Siftings. 
Mother: “And the serpent, as a punish¬ 
ment for tempting Eve, was made to crawl all 
the rest of his life.” Bobbie: “Well, mamma, 
how did he get along before?”— Life. 
Physician (to convalescent patient): “My 
bill, sir, for attendance during your late ill¬ 
ness.” Patient (looking over bill and turning 
white): “Great Scott, doctor, was I as sick as 
all that?”— Harper's Weekly. 
“Mamma,” said Flossie, who was admiring 
herself in the glass, “did God make me?’ 
“Yes, dear,” replied mamma. “Well,” was 
Flossie’s remark after a pause, “he needn’t be 
ashamed of it.”— Liberty Tribune. 
If the moon was for sale on a bargain count¬ 
er half the women in the world would want to 
buy it, and the one who did would spend the rest 
of her life wondering what on earth she’d do 
with it.— Philadelphia Call. 
Art dealer: “I can’t see why youshould 
object to that picture of spring, Mr. Com¬ 
stock. The figure certainly is draped.” Com¬ 
stock : “Yes, but it’s a glaring untruth. Where 
are her umbrella and overshoes—to say no¬ 
thing of a chest protector?”— Judge. 
A gentleman met a boy and asked him 
what o’clock it was. Being told it was just 12, 
he expressed some surprise and said he thought 
it was more. “It’s never any more in these 
parts, sir,” said the boy simply, “it begins 
again at one.”— Chicago Tribune. 
Kansas City Man: “Why, our city is so 
crowded with strangers anxious to invest in 
real estate that it takes a man fifteen minutes 
to walk a block.” Omaha Man: “Oh, tliats 
nothing, The streets of Omaha are so jammed 
that the ladies have been compelled to give 
up wearing bustles.”— Harper's Bazar. 
In the chemical laboratory: “Professor, 
what has become of Tom Apjileton? Wasn’t 
he studying with the class last year?” “Ah, 
yes; Appleton—poor fellow! A fine student, 
but absent-minded in the use of chemicals— 
very. That discoloration on the ceiling. 
Notice it?” “Yes.” “That’she. "-Tid-Bits. 
“Wiiat caused your little boy’s illness?” 
asked an ingenious woman of a mother whose 
little son was very ill. “He was climbing a 
ladder,” said the lady, “and lost his equilib¬ 
rium.” “Poor little fellow!” said the sympa¬ 
thetic listener. “Do buy him another, he’ll 
be more careful next time.”— Victorian Ga¬ 
zette. 
Irate patron: “See here, sir, I sent your 
paper an advertisement yesterday offering to 
lend money on good security, and it came out 
in llie paper ‘without security.’ I’ve been just 
deluged with applications; over l,00(kletters 
in to-day’s mail.” Able editor* “Too bad, too 
bad. 1 won’t charge you auytlnug for that, 
of course, and 1 will see that your advertise¬ 
ment is correctly printed hereafter.” Patron: 
“Thank you; good morning.” Able editor (to 
assistant): “John, make an editorial refer¬ 
ence to the fact that one advertisement in yes¬ 
terday’s paper brought in 1,000 answers.”— 
Omaha World. 
^WEAVER ORGANS 
J **' Are the Finest In Tone, Style, Finish and general 
make up of any goods made. Guaranteed for 6 years. 
Send for Catalogue, testimonials and terms, free, to 
Weuvcr Organ und Fiuno (Jo M 
Factory, York, Ft. 
Twelve Glasses of Soda Water by Mail. 
DIVINE’S SODA WATER TABLETS 
Patented May 10, 1887, by S. R. Divine, Inventor of 
Rackaroek. that blew up Hell gate, October 10, 1885. 
Fill a soda bottle with water, and put In a tablet. 
Soda Water complete, and charged with carbonic acid 
when dissolved. Fine quality. 
One dozen assorted flavors by mall, postpaid, 40 
cents; 1 '? dozen, by express, S3. 
Good article for agents. 
S. R. DIVINE. Chemist, 
Tnrrytown, N. Y. 
BUY AN 
ENGINE 
OR 
BOILER 
Until you have seen our circulars. Engines COM¬ 
PLETE from 5 to 110 Horse Power, at prices below 
those of other reputable makers. BOILERS of every 
Btyie. Automatic Engines for Electric Lights, Cen¬ 
trifugal Pumping Machinery for Drainage or Irriga¬ 
tion. Established 22 YEARS. Perfect satisfaction 
guaranteed. 1,400 in use. 
Send for Circular R, and addrefB 
MORRIS MACHINE WORKS, 
Box R. BALDWIN.-WILLE, N. Y. 
Young Wife: “Won’t you try some of my home-made bread, dear?” 
He: “I have tried, and I’ll try again, but it’s a very trying situation to beplaced in.” 
The Great Butter Herd! 
C.C.BRIGG5 X.C? 
APPLETON ST. B05TON MASS. 
MANUFACTURERS OF 
UPRIGHT 
PIANO FORTES 
§fa(e:ful 1 )e 5 !$n 3 - * 50111 ) (obstruction ' 
Mat(+ile^ tone • * Beautiful Tinish. 
ISLAND HOME STOCK FARM. 
Savage & Farnum,Impor¬ 
ters and Breeders of Per- 
cheron and French Coach 
Horses,IslandHomeStock 
Farm, Grosse Isle, Wayne 
County, Mich. We offer a 
very large stud of horses 
to select from, weguaran- 
tee our stock.make prices 
reasonable, and sell on 
easy terms, Visitors al¬ 
ways welcome. Large 
catalogue free. Address’ 
JSavuge *fc Kuril u u; 
Dktroit, Mich. 
Percheron IIorHCH. 
French Coach Horses. 
WHITMAN’SStoS^ 
PLUNGER PERPETUAL 
Guaranteed superior 
r toany Lever Press now 
„ -. — made*for Hay, Straw and 
Wool. Always victorious. Received First Premium 
at all prominent fairs for past five years, over 
Dederiok and others. Illustrated Catalogue Free. 
Whitman agr’l co.. st. Louis, 
We also make the best Steam Power Press In 
America. 
IIOLSTEIN-FRIESIAIsT CATTLE, 
CLYDESDALE, PERCHERON, FRENCH COACH AND HAMBLET0NIAN 
HORSES, BERKSHIRE AND CHESHIRE SWINE. 
The Lakeside Herd of Holstein-Friesians stands un¬ 
rivaled in average production of Milk and Butter. All interested 
are invited to send for Catalogue, giving complete records and pedi¬ 
grees of every animal in the herd, and to personally investigate the 
truth of this statement before purchasing. A large and very choice 
stud of Clydesdale Horses of all ages, fine young Percheron Stallions, 
elegant Imported French Coach Stallions, Standard Bred Hambietonian 
iso Cows in Advanced Registry Stallions, of the best trottiug strains. Registered Berkshire and 
Cheshire Swine. Prices low for quality of stock. 
SMITHS, POWELL & LAMB, Syracuse, N. Y. 
In writing always mention The Rural New-Yorker. 
THE BRADLEY 
“BIG 6” MOWER 
Cuts a swath C feet wide and is easily handled by an ordinary farm 
team. Double the usual amount of grass can be cut with one team and 
one man. Three years in the markerhas demonstrated that the Brad¬ 
ley No. (> Is the most economical tool ever purchased by the farmer. 
We guarantee the draft to be satisfactory to the purchaser on any ordi¬ 
nary level farm. We also make Mowers to cut S‘4 ft., 4'A ft., 4'/< ft. and 
5 ft. The Bradley Reapers, Mowers and Rakes are the Dost 
in the World. Send for Circulars. 
BRANCHES; 
63 Murray Si., New York. 
32 So. Market St., Boston. 
BRADLEY & CO., 
Syracuse, N. Y. 
COMFORT 
ON 
TWO WHEELS 
BEEBE 
CartCo, 
RACINE, 
WIK. 
ll-WILLIAMS 
Grain Threshers, Horse Powers, and Engines. 
TTlghest prize awarded these m, jhlncs at the New 
York State Ag. Soc.’s latest trial, overa large num¬ 
ber competing. ‘'.Ample warranty and opportunity 
for trial given. For full particulars address 
ST. JOIINSVTLLE A Grit’ll WORKS, 
bt» Johusvillc, Montgomery Co. 1 New York. 
Sherwood’s Steel Harness 
BHERWOOl) harness CO., W. 
8IUAUU8K, N. V. 
CANTON IKON HOOFING CO., 
CANTON, OHIO. 
MANUFACTURERS OF THE H. W.SMITn PATENT 
STEEL; HOOFHXTG-. 
Made of genuine Sheet Steel and Calnmlned Steel. Also 
CORItCCATER IRON Roofing and Siding. Headed Iron Celling and 
Siding, Crimped Edge Roofing and Siding, Roof Paint, Roofer’s Paper, etc. 
Send for Catalogue, Price List, and Samples. Mention Rural New-Yorker. 
Q FR’S UNION HORSE-POWER 
B... 
KUgf H iiEVIiliTREAI). DOUBLE GEARED. 
■Blr -Q Largest Track Wheels and No Cross Rods. 
UNIO THRESHER AND CLEANER. 
FAffi: MILLS, FEED CUTTERS, 
U IRCULAR SAW MACHINES. &C; 
W.L~0YER&BR0. 
ILLUSTRATED CATALOGUE FUEL. 
RUSTLESS 
IRON WATER PIPE. 
Send for catalogue. THE WELLS RUSTLESS IRON Co., 
lirainan, Dow & Co., 1 Boston Ag’ts lor New England. til Cl 111 Street, New York. 
5 Every part 
*a Strong 
Practical 
Tool. 
Intelligence U knowing a good thing when 
you see it; Wisdom Is getting it. 
A, Nail Puller: H« Monkey 
Wrench and Vise; C, Hammer; A 
I), large Gas Pliers; E, Pincers; 
K,Wire Cutter; <x, small Gas Pliers; 
II, Nut Cracker. For farmers, doc¬ 
tors, horsemen. Even' family needs 
it—city or country. Sold by hard¬ 
ware trade. If your dealer is out, 
we will send direct on receipt of price. 
Tools, 10 inch, weight 1% lbs., »1.25. ___ 
iS in., weight 2 A lbs, S1.50. Polished, 25 cents extra. 
MODEL MFU. CO.lOT^Uuutingdon St. Pbila. Pa. Sole 
BEST CAST STEEL, 
AGENTS 
WANTED 
GOOD NEWS 
TO L ADI 
tli-catest Inducement s ever of¬ 
fered. Now’s your time to get 
up orders for our celebrated 
Teas and Coffees, and secure 
a beautiful Gold Band or Mohs 
_ Rose China Tea Set, Dinner Set, 
Gold Band Moss Rose Toilet Set, Watch, Brass Damp, 
or Webster's Dictionary. For full particulars address 
THE GREAT AMERICAN TEA CD., 
I’. (). Box 289. 81 and 33 Vescy St., New York. 
ts-— - y-J Fine Blooded Cattle, Sheep, Hogs, Poul- 
try, Sporting Dogs for sale. Catalagucs 
with 150 cng’v’s free. N. P. Boyer & Co., Coatesvllle, Pa. 
FOR SALE. 
A STOCK FARM of 105 Acres In the famous County 
of Orange, three hours from New York City, short 
drive to town or 12 0 <i 0 population, and half mile from 
Railway Station; substantial house of 13 rooms, hot 
und cold water; heated by steam; Conservatory at¬ 
tached; numerous well arranged and commodious 
outbuildings. Three small streams and numerous 
springs. Perfect home for stock breedej In a lovely, 
salubrious, well-to-do agricultural section. Brice 
$ 35,000 (Folio 3 572) PIIILLIPH «fc WELLS, 
Tribune Building, New York. 
GRINDER 
’erf eci Mowing 
Machine Knife 
Grinder, 
15000 
Machines in actual 
use testifying to its 
merits. 
Can be carried Into the Held and attached to Mowing 
Machine Wheel. Send for new Descriptive Catalogue. 
HIGUANUM MANUK’!;. CORPORATION, 
Main Office: 11IGGAN DM, CONN. 
Successors to R. II. Allen & Co., 189 Water St., N. Y 
