358 
' MAY 25 
THE RURAL NEWMTORKER. 
OUR FIRST FARMERS’ INSTITUTE. 
BY WM. ROSS. 
CHAPTER VII.— Concluded. 
rpHE President consented, and they sang, 
JL “The Old Tin Horn.” 
When the song was finished the President 
said: 
“The institute is now adjourned till one 
o’clock;’be prompt in your attendance, and 
bring more ladies with you.” This brought 
laughter and applause. 
As the President was occupying the judge’s 
stand, I suppose he thought he ought to imi¬ 
tate the court as nearly as he could. 
“Promptly at one, order was called. Pretty 
soon the usher was seen peeping round after 
vacant seats aud crowding people closer to¬ 
gether. During the afternoon the business 
was transacted in the same vigorous manner 
as before; as soon as one performance was fin¬ 
ished, another was ready, without allowing 
any time to be wasted. When four o’clock 
came, the president adjourned the institute till 
seven o’clock. 
“ Mr. President, can’t we meet at half past 
six?” asked some one in the audience. 
“Yes!” replied he “ let it be half past six 
then: be on time.” 
Notwithstanding the largest church in 
town had a booming meeting on hand, sitting 
room was in demand that night in the 
court-room, and the premonitions that the 
President had given the committee, a month 
before, did not now seem so visionary. Af ter 
a half-hour of music and short addresses, 
Mr.jBrown gave his inimitable lecture on 
“Wanted—A Manl” which was listened to 
with intense attention. As soon as the lecture 
was finished the choir rose and sang. When 
it finished, an awful silence pervaded the 
whole room. Every eye seemed to be looking 
intently at the President, as if asking, “ What 
next?” He seemed to be at a loss to know how 
to break that silence. He thought that to 
proceed further would be malapropos. 
Directly he said, ‘ ‘ There i3 no fixed time on 
the program for the adjournment of the even¬ 
ing session. Whenever the institute so de¬ 
sires we will entertain a motion to adjourn ’’ 
Immediately a motion to adjourn was passed. 
Just as the motion was put, Mr. Frisk arose, 
“ I wanted to remark ”- 
“A motion to adjourn is not a motion to 
remark on,” replied President Bark. 
“I was going to suggest,” Mr. President, 
‘that we meet a half-hour earlier to-morrow 
morning tbau the program sets.” 
“ If there are no obj ctions, I’ll accept your 
suggestion.” 
“There being no objection, the institute is 
now adjourned till nine o’clock to-morrow 
morning,” said the President. 
“ Why! that lecture was the finest thing I 
ever heard,” said Professor Franks, “and 
when I came in here, and heard that choir 
sing; why! I was perfectly elated; why! here 
I was right in an old-fashioned singing- 
school! why! I didn’t know, hardly, how to 
hold myself!” 
There were a great many terse congratu¬ 
latory commendations uttered, that were not 
excelled by the exuberant professor’s ejacula¬ 
tions, as the crowd slowly passed out. The 
music had now become a very attractive 
feature. It was pure, unadulterated vocal 
music, with no organ or brass horn nonsense, 
or string instrument squeaking mixed up 
with it. That choir came to sing, and they 
sang. If a momentary lull in the business 
happened at any time, “ Music!” “ Give us a 
song!” “More music!” would be heard from 
the audience, and when the President would 
be passing in to commence business, he would 
receive such reminders, as, “ Don't cramp the 
choir!” “Give us plenty of music!” “Mind 
ths music, Bark,” and Bark interspersed it 
liberally. 
The business was conducted the second day 
with the same energy and with equal interest. 
The seating capacity of the room was filled to 
overflowing. 
A committee on resolutions and one on per¬ 
manent organization were appointed. The 
latter recommended a permanent institute to 
meet yearly,or as often as it may elect. Mr. 
Bark was re-elected president and J. Edwards 
vice-presicient. A committee on finance and 
one on arrangements for next meeting, 
were appointed. Soon after noon the presi¬ 
dent said: “I have been informed that our 
speakers have to leave on this evening’s train. 
It may not be prudent to hold an evening 
session without them, and unless the institute 
order otherwise it will close at four o’clock. 
The committee will arrange accordingly.” 
There were three good lectures delivered by 
the State speakers on this day. 
Bill Bark’s capacious program was not 
much too big; if the institute had held an¬ 
other evening session,it would have been just 
right. 
The committee on resolutions resolved 
thanks to the good people of Woodside; to 
the eminent speakers, to the ladies aud gen¬ 
tlemen of the New Agreement choir, and cor¬ 
dially invited them to come back to the fu¬ 
ture sessions of the institute; and the heart¬ 
iest thanks to the various newspapers of 
Woodside, commending them for their 
great zeal in making this institute a success. 
“Mr. Bonham requested that if I found any 
good manuscripts,” remarked Mr. Brown, 
“to send them in for publication, and as there 
are several here, I would like to get them.” 
“I suggest,” replied Mr.Bark,“that,as proba¬ 
bly our home papers would like to publish 
them,and our people would like to read them, 
they be distributed to the papers, and 
that they then be sent, printed , to Mr. Bon¬ 
ham.” It was so arranged. At four o’clock 
the whole audience rose and sang the long- 
meter doxology, and the institute was de¬ 
clared closed. 
After the close, commendations and con¬ 
gratulations seemed to be the order. The fol¬ 
lowing are specimens. 1 heard an old farmer 
ask Mr. Bark: “ How often are you going to 
have these things?” 
“About once a year, I suppose,” replied 
Bark. 
“Why, they are too good to wait so long 
for; why couldn’t we have them oftener: 
every three, or six months?” 
“We can have them if we just go at and 
have them,” said Bark. 
Mr. Brown was asked how our institute 
compared with others, considering it was 
our first? 
“ It is away above the average of those I 
have attended,” he replied, “and your own 
people have taken part in the various discus¬ 
sions, beyond my expectations.’ ’ 
“How does it compare in attendance?” 
“Considering the horrible kind of roads you 
have, it is fully up to the average.” 
The next week all the papers devoted a con¬ 
siderable space to the institute. One of them 
gave it this ‘‘send off”: 1 ‘Last Monday a very 
respectable number of the farmers of Excel¬ 
lent county, whose appearance would compare 
favorably with most State legislative bodies, 
met at the court-house.” The farmers are 
puzzled, however, to know just what that 
means. If the editor had been writing up a 
State legislative body and said it “compared 
favorably with that very respectable number 
of farmers,” it could have been easily under¬ 
stood, aud the people would have felt that 
their interests were safe in the hands of such 
a body. 
Any locality that contemplates having a 
farmers’ institute can have it by adopting 
Bill Bark’s method: “The way to have it, is 
to just have it.” 
THE END. 
Among the “ dime novel ” literature Indian 
stories have been yielding fast of late to de¬ 
tective tales, and the detective agency busi¬ 
ness has greatly increased. One of these facts 
may be a cause or a consequence of the other, 
or both maybe simply “signs of the times.” 
The number of bogus detective agencies,how¬ 
ever, has by far transcended that of the real 
kind. Every large city has one or more and 
many smaller towns are not without them. 
They advertise pretty extensively through 
certain classes of papers and by circulars 
through the mails. Most, if not all of them 
‘ 1 want agents all over the world. ” The only re¬ 
quirement is that the embryo detective should 
send $5 or sometimes $10 to the “agency,” 
and keep his lips tightly closed as to his iden¬ 
tity. If he isn’t careful on the last point, the 
local police where he resides may hustle him 
tojailasa fraud. Of course, therefore, he 
can never even attempt to make an arrest 
lest such a folly might lodge him in the cala¬ 
boose. All the aspiring Hawkshaw will 
have for his $5 or $10, therefore, is his own 
consciousness that he is a detective. The 
“ agencies,” of course, make big promises 
of profitable employment in hunting up 
all sorts of rascals, but, equally of course, 
they never intend to keep those prom¬ 
ises, nor could they do so however hard 
they might wish. In nearly all the States 
the laws with regard to private detectives are 
very stringent. Substantially all provide 
that any person who shall engage in the busi¬ 
ness of a detective for hire or reward or who 
shall advertise his business to be that of a de¬ 
tective, without first having obtained a li¬ 
cense so to do from the Court of Quarter 
Sessions ot the county, or some other Court 
with jurisdiction in such cases, shall be guilty 
of a misdemeanor, and upon conviction there¬ 
of, shall be sentenced to fine and imprison¬ 
ment of various amounts and duration. The 
law also generally requires bonds from the 
agency for security and as a guarantee of 
the legitimacy of its business. The J. C. 
Grannan Detective Agency, Cincinnati, Ohio, 
and the “Central Detective - Department,” 
Topeka, Kansas, have of late been partic¬ 
ularly busy in this bogus business. All these 
agencies want is the $5 or $10, and all their 
dupes will ever get from them is a badge and 
a set of worthless credentials. Occasionally 
one, if specially troublesome or'inquisitive, is 
punished by being started on a wild goose 
chase after some bogus or notorious criminal; 
but as he has to pay all his own expenses, aud 
could do the same work just as well inde¬ 
pendently, he soon gets tired of it and settles 
back into the prosaic life of ordinary business 
routine. 
The other day, Judge Wickes, holding 
court at Chestertown, Maryland, gave a de¬ 
cision with regard to the validity of a note 
given in payment of “ hull-less oats ” which 
had been sold on the plan practiced by the 
Bohemian oats swindlers. The case was dock¬ 
eted Meginnis vs. Johnson. The latter gave 
a note for $100 in payment for 10 bushels of 
oats. At the same time he received a paper 
in the form of a contract which bound the 
“Grain and Cereal Company,” of Carroll 
County, Maryland, to sell for said Johnson 20 
bushels of the crop from the purchased seed 
at $10 per bushel, so that the oats and the 
contract were the consideration for the note. 
This note fell into the hands of Mr. Joseph 
Meginnis, who, of course, assumed the role of 
an “ innocent holder. ” He managed to obtain 
from Johnson a second note for $80 in lieu of 
the original note for $100. The court gave 
judgment in favor of Johnson, and imposed 
all the costs upon Meginnis, declaring that 
the whole transaction was a fraud, and that 
the holder of the note had knowledge of its 
fraudulent character. Meginnis’s attorney 
set up a claim that a law passed in 1888 for¬ 
bidding such fraudulent schemes as the Hull¬ 
less oats, Bohemian oats, and Red line 
wheat swindles, prevented the Carroll county 
fraud from fulfilling its contract; but the 
court decided that the act was no bar to any 
legitimate business in oats or wheat and only 
interfered with fraudulent transactions. The 
judge said that, while notes in the hands of 
really innocent parties could be collected, it 
was against public policy and good morals to 
enforce an obligation under the circumstan¬ 
ces, and the court would not sanction it. It 
is one of the laws of nature that, as a rule, a 
fool should suffer for his folly, but the people 
of that class who have had dealings with 
these grain swindlers, may, by boldly resist¬ 
ing the payment of their notes, very often es¬ 
cape the results of their folly, at least, in part. 
One of the New York daily papers the 
other day gave up a column and three-quar¬ 
ters of its space to the exposure of a “wicked 
swindle” with which it charges the “New 
York Laundry Works,” of 23 Dey street, this 
city. This concern widely advertises that it 
“will send, as a free gift, a full suit of 
clothes for a gentleman or a dress pattern of 
black silk for a lady” to every one who will 
send $1 for one of its wonderful automatic 
family washing machines, show it to his or 
her friends and help along the sale. The ma¬ 
chine is said to retail at $2 and is puffed up to 
the skies. The concern boasts of having sold 
100,000 washers last year. Great induce¬ 
ments are offered to agents, and the adver¬ 
tisement, though very beguiling to the gulli¬ 
ble, to people of ordinary shrewdness bears 
on its face all the marks of a swindle. On 
investigation, it turns out that the concern 
says it will give the dress only to those who 
will buy $75 worth of the machines in one 
year, although the advertisement plainly 
says that it will send a machine and a $30 
dress to every person who will forward to it 
$1 and be willing to extend its sales. It is 
said that the machine will do a family’s wash¬ 
ing automatically in 30 mimites, but a test 
proves that the little thing is utterly worth¬ 
less and couldn’t do a family’s washing in 30 
years. The business quarters of the “Laundry 
Works” consist of a small,dirty, ill-furni-hed, 
♦’carpetless office over a corner rum-mill. The 
occupants are a young girl busy mailing cir¬ 
culars and a couple of impudent young men, 
proprietors of the “Works,” who are prompt 
to jeer at a greenhorn who expected to get a $2 
machine and a $30 dress for $1. Is this the 
only concern of the kind in the country? 
Why, bless you 1 no. There are hundreds of 
others just as bad scattered in all the big 
cities in the' Union, with a fair sprinkling in 
smaller places. 
The “salvage sale” swindle, conducted by 
Prescott, Reid & Co., of Boston and Chicago, 
is denounced in many parts of the country. 
The circulars of the concern announce that it 
has been granted special license from the Cus¬ 
tom House to sell to consumers only damaged 
cargoes of English, Scotch and French goods 
secured from various wrecked steamships, the 
names of which are generally given. The 
list of the goods is presented, and the amount 
of the loss through the wreck is stated. Sam¬ 
ples of the goods marked at extremely low 
prices are appended. Agents are going around 
distributing these circulars, and the following 
day they generally appear with inferior dry 
goods, purporting to come from the wreck. 
Investigation proves that none of the wrecks 
mentioned ever occurred ; that no arrange¬ 
ment had ever been made with the Custom 
House; that the latter would never consent to 
any such arrangement as that mentioned, and 
that the concern consisted of a pack of scoun¬ 
drels bent on cheating the public by palming 
off on the ignorant, over-greedy and unwary 
a cheap, poor class of home-made goods under 
the guise of fine, expensive foreign fabrics 
slightly damaged. Several of the “agents” 
of the concern have been arrested in different 
parts of the country. The Rural has often 
exposed such swindles, an d our readers should 
remember that each of the dishonest schemes 
mentioned here is merely a specimen of a num¬ 
ber of others of substantially the same stripe. 
It is rather improbable that Prescott, Reid & 
Co. will ever again—under this title at any 
rate—appeal to the greed or gullibility of the 
public: but other concerns of the same kind 
are sure to do so, and this is a warning against 
these rather than against the concern men¬ 
tioned, which is certain to collapse soon, if it 
has not already done so within the last few 
days. 
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i.V\ l> ci a T 17_SUPERIOR. Grazing 
Jr V / JLV i3ix_JUl2i and Stock Farm in 
FAUQUIER COUNTY, VIRGINIA, 
40 miles south of Washington City, and one mile from 
Warreuton Junction, Va. Midland R’.v—1003 acres. 900 
acres is highly Improved,superior quality for grass and 
gratn; is well watered; has a handsome residence, 
Stone Grist Mill, Cattle House, Tennnt Houses, &c. This 
line property will be sold at a sacrifice. Address the 
owner, A. N. IIASTAIILE, 
27 W. North Avenue, Baltimore, Md. 
General Advertising Rates of 
THU RURAL NEW - YORKER. 
34 PARK ROW, NEW YORK. 
The folloiving rates are invariable. All are there¬ 
fore respectfully informed that any correspondence 
with a view to obtaining different terms will prove 
futile. 
Ordinary Advertisements, per agate line (this 
sized type, 14 lines to the inch).80 cents 
One thousand lines or more.wlthin one year 
from date of first insertion, per agate line, 25 “ 
Yearly orders occupying 14 or more lines 
agate space.25 
Preferred positions.25 per cent, extra. 
Reading Notices, ending with u Adv.," per 
line, minion leaded.75 cents 
Terms of Subscription. 
The subscription price of the Rural New-Yorker is 
Single copy, per year.$2-00 
“ “ Six months. 1-10 
Great Britain. Ireland, Australia and _ 
Germany, per year, post-paid.#5.04 (12s. Cd.) 
Franco... 8.04 (16J^ fr.) 
French Colonies. 4.08 (29^ f r.) 
Agents will be supplied with canvassing outfit on 
application._ 
Entered at the Post-office at New York Cltr. N. Y, 
as second class mail uiMMa 
Beaut? 
Skir\ & Scalp 
