514 
AUG 3 
GOLDEN GRAINS. 
I N reply to'a correspondent, the Journal of 
Commerce says that nothing is more dif¬ 
ficult of explanation than the mental process 
by which a person of respectable exterior and 
presumed good judgment will justify himself 
for standing in a crowd of people on the plat¬ 
form of a car or ferryboat, or in a waiting- 
room, and puffing from hi6 lips the smoke of 
a cigar or the foul fumes of a cigarette, when 
he cannot fail to see that the discharge goes 
directly into the face of some other person. 
We see this every day, and it is one of the 
marvels to be found in a civilized community. 
A subscriber sends in the following illus¬ 
tration of childish faith and love: “After 
kissing my little four-year-old daughter, (who 
had but recently lost her mother! good-night, 
I observed that she kissed her hand and then 
threw it upward. I said to her: ‘Jennie, 
what are you doing?’ She replied: ‘J 
threw a kiss to mamma.' ”. 
Sir Walter Scott said that guilt, though 
it may attain temporal splendor, can never 
confer real happiness. The evil consequences 
of crime long survive their commission, and, 
like the ghosts of the murdered, forever 
haunt the steps of the malefactor. The paths 
of virtue, though very seldom those of world¬ 
ly greatness, are always those of pleasantness 
and peace. 
Beecher said that the great art of manag¬ 
ing a congregation lies in this: be good-na¬ 
tured yourself, and keep them good-natured, 
and then they will not need any managing... 
The wide pasture is but separate spears of 
grass; the sheeted bloom of the prairies but 
isolated flowers. However small, that cannot 
be insignificant individually without which 
greatness would not be great, nor beautiful¬ 
ness beautiful. 
The man whose eyes are wide open in see¬ 
ing the faults of others, and scarcely open at 
all in seeing his own faults, is very sure to 
commit two mistakes—-one in not correctly 
judging of others and the other in not cor¬ 
rectly judging of himself. Such a man is apt 
to be a sort of nuisance in every circle in 
which he moves. 
A Grave error of far too many mothers 
consists in the fact that they educate their 
daughters to make a show and a dash, as the 
way to get married, rather than to be good 
and competent wives after they are married. 
This is a very serious mistake in female edu¬ 
cation, and, withal, entails a great many evils 
upon the married life. No young woman is 
really fit to become a wife who is not practi¬ 
cally qualified for the duties of the position.. 
A Minister narrates the following: While 
walking along one of the London streets a 
Paris pastor came forward and accosted me 
thus: “Excuse me, but were you not in Paris 
some time ago?” I said: “Yes, I was,” and 
then he inquired: “Did you not, in one of your 
addresses there, say that the latch was on our 
side of the doorV ’ “Yes, I believe I did say 
so,” I replied. “Well,” he answered, “I al¬ 
ways thought it was on the Lord’s side, and I 
kept knocking, and knocking, until I heard of 
your words, and what a joy came over me! I 
lifted the latch. Since then all has been 
changed; my church, my congregation, my 
work, and every thing about me!” Oh, re¬ 
member that the latch, is on your side of the 
door!. . 
Domestic (Sccmoimj 
CONDUCTED BY MRS. AGNES E. M. CARMAN. 
EXTRACTS FROM SUNDAY-EVENING 
TALKS AT THE RURAL GROUNDS. 
CERTAIN MORAL AND SOCIAL ACTS IN THEIR 
RELATIONS TO THE DEMANDS OF REAL 
FRIENDSHIP. 
C hronic professional visitors. 
“Something for Nothing” might well 
be given as the name of a certain sort of 
friendship that recognizes its obligations by a 
never-failing polite but indolent courtesy. 
There is always a gentle, apt, refined reply 
for all favors. “So good of you”-“So 
thoughtful”-“Pray do not let me put you 
out”-“I’m troubling you so much and 
you take it so kindly.” These sponges whose 
politeness is only equaled by their inertness, 
seem to assume that a polished recognition of 
the services rendered them is a full equiva¬ 
lent; that gracious manners, oily tongues, 
well chosen words of flattery weigh heavily 
against the trouble they cause. The demon¬ 
strative^ evidences of_well-bred_and easy man¬ 
ners, of skillfully spoken compliments have a 
value that pleases the ear and tickles the vani¬ 
ty for awhile. But they are too volatile. 
One soon demands a trifle of substance to help 
him on. There is too much fine crockery and 
china about the thing; too little of a solid 
dinner. The lunch is rather airy and one suf¬ 
fers the “gone” feeling before another meal. 
Many people of this class, if judged by their 
smooth, careful words, seem to be models of 
modesty and appreciation. As a matter of 
fact, they are the boldest, most selfish people 
in the world. Don’t you know of such people? 
Complacent, easy-going, bound to be happy, 
always wearing a smile; always full of grace 
and kindly, sympathetic words and ways— 
they come to your house, and though seeing 
and feeling that they are not, can not be 
welcome, squat themselves down, stay as 
long as they like and never turn a hand to 
help or to lessen the work of an already over¬ 
worked household. They have repaid us in 
the coin of their sprightly conversation, of 
their gracious behavior and in their parting 
words: “ You have been so kind and consid¬ 
erate; I have enjoyed my visit so much; I 
wish I might reciprocate in my own home; I 
shall hope soon to visit you again,” and so on. 
My own family has suffered from these in¬ 
cubuses as long as I can remember. I recall 
no less than four lustrous specimens of the 
genuine type, the sight of any one of whom as 
he entered the house would cause a cold chill 
and a hopeless feeling to take possession of 
all. Such leeches do not inspire any depth of 
friendly regard. They have no real friends, 
because there is no such thing as a mutual 
friendship without mutual sacrifices. Still 
they seem to get through life comfortably, 
live to an everlasting age and die with all 
the easy, indolent complacency that; was their 
chief characteristic through life. While we 
may despise this kind of life, most of us ac¬ 
cord a certain amount of respect for the 
gentle astuteness; for the amiable cunning; 
the ready faculty of repartee, the dignified 
indolence that with so little apparent effort 
secured them a livelihood. It is a question 
whether the people or families who are 
afflicted by the considerate regard of these 
affectionate and harmless tramps are entitled 
to any sympathy. If we are overwhelmed 
with visitors, we have no one to reproach but 
ourselves—and the more uncongenial those 
visitors are, the more we are reproachable. It 
is an act of hypocrisy to extend the same 
welcome to unwelcome people that we would 
extend to those whom we consider true and 
worthy friends; those who by ties of blood or 
for services rendered have a real claim upon 
our regard. 
OURS AND OTHERS. 
We have often heard the remark when dis¬ 
putes have occurred in which one’s wife or 
husband was a main actor, “Well, I could 
not go back upon my wife.” Or, “ I couldn’t 
openly decide against my husband, though he 
was plainly in the wrong.” We hare all of 
us had occasion to observe that the mother is 
prone to shelter her beloved daughter or little 
boy as against some one else’s little daughter 
or boy. One or the other has told a lie or 
committed a theft. The evidence all points 
to our own child as the culprit. Do we pin 
him down as closely ; do we scold him as vehe¬ 
mently ; do we punish him as vigorously as we 
would have the other boy pinned down, 
scolded and punished if he were the culprit? 
Suppose that your darling little boy—your 
BEAUTY-boy—picks a muss with Charley Reck 
and Charley blacks your darling’s eye and 
causes his nose to bleed. Are not we inclined 
to cut Mr. Reck in two before we have insti¬ 
tuted a fair trial to ascertain which boy 
caused the disturbance! Suppose that your 
husband comes home with his ambulatory 
rectitude sadly impaired, would you speak of 
this little matter as freely and censoriously to 
your neighbors as you would tell them that 
your friend Isaacsen or Rosy-Morn returned 
in the same exhilarated condition? 
Let us suppose that you love your wire and 
that you dislike Isaacsen’s wife and that 
these two women quarrel, each making such 
grave charges against the other that a public 
investigation becomes necessary. Would you 
—could you decide against your wife! The 
case might be so serious that such a decision 
would forever cast a shadow upon the family 
name. 
Now does love for individuals lessen our 
moral obligations to others? Is your child or 
husband or wife entitled to any more consid¬ 
eration than any other child, wife or husband! 
We are all children of God. Do you think 
tLat He would discriminate against or in 
favor of any of us? 
He is our perfect friend. It would there¬ 
fore seem that, if we decide the question 
raised by His teachings, the wife must raise 
her hand to strike her own loved husband or 
idolized child just as relentlessly as she 
would to smite those whom she may dislike 
but who may be just as dear to others. 
And there can he no such thing as a real , 
true friendship between two individuals 
either of whom would seek to protect the 
other from merited punishment or disgrace. 
If this be the truth, it seems a hard, cruel truth 
when first considered. It is not improbable, 
however, that the greatest sins and injustices 
of the world, millions of examples of which 
are being committed or enacted daily, are 
those which have their origin in the power of 
the strong over the weak. The murderer es¬ 
capes the law’s just punishment Because he 
can pay $1,000 or more for noted lawyers; for 
false witnesses; for powerful influences both 
of people and of the press in his favor. Power¬ 
ful monied combinations command services at 
their own price, and when 10,000 people are 
killed by the breaking away of a dam, no one 
is found responsible; when hundreds are 
smashed to pieces or burned to death by the 
culpable negligence of incompetent railway 
officials, or smothered to death in a coal-pit, 
no one is found punishable. In smaller in¬ 
stances, the employed are generally at the 
mercy of the employers. The hired man said 
what was assumed as disrespectful language 
to the wife. The gallant and indignant hus¬ 
band nearly chokes him and then kicks him 
off the place without ever having asked for 
the hired man’s story. 
Two clerks quarrel. One is a highly valu¬ 
able clerk; the other of little or no account. 
How many employers will give a careful, just 
hearing to the good-for-naught if a just de¬ 
cision is to deprive them of the services ot the 
one they cannot well get along without? We 
owe to every living person, modified in degree, 
every feeling, every consideration that is en¬ 
tertained for or extended to the nearest 
friend, and it is difficult to see how any one 
who is indifferent to the sufferings, misfor¬ 
tunes; to the comfort and well-being of those 
with whom he comes in contact, either in so¬ 
cial or business life, will prove a real true 
friend to any single individual. 
Any man or woman who will act unfairly 
to those in his or her employ will act unfairly 
to his children, wife or mother under equiva¬ 
lent provocation. Now, dear little Trav., to 
make this principle plain to you as well as to 
the rest, let me say that if Papa would not 
scruple to take an unfair advantage of Mr. C. 
or of Miss C., both believed to be earnest and 
honest assistants in his business, he would 
under intenser provocation be unfair to you, 
to Corise or to Mamma. 
And so, on the other hand, if you are capa¬ 
ble of a meanness to Tommy Brown, of bully¬ 
ing Johnny or Mamie to induce them to serve 
you; of soft-soaping Uncle John to induce 
him to permit you to shoot his pigeons, you 
are equally capable of acting in just the same 
way towards your parents when you have an 
urgent wish to gratify. 
Hire All the Help You Can Afford.— 
Many of our most effective workers act upon 
the rule: “Never do a stitch of work that you 
can hire or induce another person to do as 
well.” It is a wise rule and one upon which 
the harmony of the universe depends. Larger 
insects prey upon smaller ones and parasites 
prey upon all; stronger fish eat up the weaker 
ones; the larger and more powerful 
of the lower animals, seemingly with¬ 
out the slightest sense of piety or justice, 
devour the weaker animal according to 
their whims or necessities and man according 
to his whims or necessities destroys or de¬ 
vours them all. Little moons and stars re¬ 
volve about greater ones and the greater ones 
still about greater ones until, in so far as 
can be judged when we consider infinity of 
space, universe revolves about universe. In 
the vegetable world, a similar law governs 
all—the weaker is ever succumbing to the 
stronger and the “ survival of the fittest” is 
the apt phrase that expresses the relations 
between servant and master. Every one 
serves, be he master, servant or slave. We 
ore mutually dependent—the one upon the 
other—and all living things; all inanimate 
things; all things are alike dependent upon 
certain mutual continuous relations. The 
necessities of our nature imply destruction 
We cannot move or think or act except by 
the power which destroys something. It is by 
destruction that we live; that we are warmed 
and ted; that we study, learn, teach, worship, 
hate or love. Did you ever think how many 
living creatures each one of us necessarily 
destroys every day in plowing and cultivat 
ing the land; in our war against insects in 
jurious to vegetation, as we put it; in walk¬ 
ing, in breathing, in building our houses, in 
constructing and running our railroads, in 
eating and sleeping? 
Borne one must be the hod-carrier; some 
one the mason; some one the build 
er and some one the superintendent 
Then some one must employ them all aud 
furnish the means to pay for their ser¬ 
vices. We^have^the wash-woman, the 
kitchen-girl, the up-stairs girl, the maid of all 
work. We have the errand boy, the counter 
jumper, the floor-walker, the book-keeper, 
the cashier, and members of the firm. Do 
you excel as a wash-woman, a cook, a sales¬ 
man, a book-keeper? Do you excel as a hod- 
carrier, mason, boss-mason? Then that’s 
your place. If a hod-carrier, do your work 
faithfully and don’t do one stitch of work 
that you can hire or induce another to do. If 
you excel as a cook, there’s your place. If 
you can render better service by buying your 
clothing, by employing dress-makers by 
all means do it. In this way you help to sup¬ 
port others while rendering yourself more 
efficient in your chosen work. No one can 
afford to spend his time upon less valuable 
ivork which others for less pay will do as 
well or better. If you are the mistress of a 
home, seek to make it an instance of model- 
house-keeping according to your means. If 
by hiring the services of wash-women, 
kitchen-maids, chamber-maids, you can ap¬ 
proach more nearly to perfect house-keeping, 
hire them all. They are benefited—so are 
you—so is your family—so is society. 
Do thy part well whatever it may 
be. But if by nature and education you are 
in truth a hod-carrier or a cook, pray do not 
assume to be a boss-mason or the head of the 
house. All the hired assistance in the land 
could not serve to make you the right person 
in the right place. As soon as you find you 
are not fitted to your occupation, abandon it, 
get out of it and set to work to find out what 
you are fitted for and go at that. It is mis¬ 
fits that upset the world. They neither super¬ 
intend nor follow wisely. There is really no 
place for them anywhere, and having no place 
they crowd and distort all they touch or come 
in contact with. The great trouble in the 
world is that few of us really know our place; 
few of us are willing to make the exertion 
and sacrifice which excellence demands. It is 
far better that I should be an excellent ser¬ 
vant than an incompetent master. We will 
all grant that. But who is to say that being 
an excellent servant, I would not be a compe¬ 
tent master if I had the chance ? There are 
too many of us that would rather rule in hell 
than serve in heaven. There are too many of 
us that, with little care for the harmony of 
things and guided by the impulses of the hour 
or day, and the comforts thereof, care little 
for the morrow, or the effect of our short¬ 
comings upon those about us. Here we have 
the class of people that find everything in the 
world just right-wrong. Friendship! they 
scout the word. It is a farce. They could 
tell you for a week on a stretch, of the acts of 
kindness and liberality they had bestowed 
upon others not one of which was ever ap¬ 
preciated or repaid—their aim being merely 
to grind all they could out of them and then 
kick them out to starve. Is any one entitled 
to friendship that puts forth little or no con¬ 
secutive, persevering effort to excel in one or 
the other of the necessary industries of life? 
Or is he entitled to friendly regard who fully 
capable of excelling in some humbler occupa¬ 
tion, scoffs and snarls and bites because a 
higher position, for which he is in no wise 
fitted, is not thrown at his feet? 
A FEW HOUSEHOLD HINTS 
I HAVE always voted tidies nuisances. A 
lovely art square finished with a border 
of velvet aud antique lace is certainly very 
pretty to look upon, but is never meant to 
rest against. I have sat down when tired and 
weary, when it would have done my aching 
back good to have rested it against the chair 
or sofa back, but as each conceivable place in 
the room where a tidy could be used was fill¬ 
ed with one of some sort, a bunch of ribbons 
and laces, crazy, antique, hand-painted, etc., 
it was impossible. I mentally wished all such 
trumpery in Hades or some other place. But 
there are places where a tidy seems like an 
oasis in p desert! But the tidy must be made of 
something that is substantial, to be of real use. 
Suppose we have in our parlor or sitting-room 
a cozy, comfortable chair, which from this 
very fact begins to show the ravages of Time. 
There is a dingy look at the top of the back 
whore many a curly head has rested, where 
perhaps “ grandma ” whose snowy locks are 
now lying beneath the daisies, used to sit for 
hours at a time. What is to be done about 
W hen Baoy was slca, we gave her fcaszort* 
When she was a Child, she cried for Castorla 
When she became Miss, she clung to Castorlfi, 
When she had Children she jave then) CasUwri* 
