“Yes,” said a fashionable lady, “I think 
Mary has made a very good match. I hear 
her husband is one of the shrewdest and most 
unprincipled lawyers in the profession, and of 
course he cun afford to gratify her every wish.” 
A little girl asked, during a hail storm, 
“Are the angels popping corin'' The same 
child asked, after attending the service at a 
Quaker church, one cold morning, "Why 
don’t they think at home, instead of going to 
church and wasting fire?” 
Two “gemmeus” in Austin, disputing as to 
the “pr<>perest” way in saying, “We eated at de 
tableor “we has done ate at de table,” called 
on Uncle Moses to decide. His answer was: 
“In de case of you two niggahs, none of you 
am right. De properest way for sich cattle as 
you am is to say “ We fed at de troff.” 
A certain judge, who had beeu a great 
scamp years before his accession to the bench, 
recognizing an old acquaintance in a prisoner 
brought before him, aud supposing himself 
safe from recognition, asked the prisoner 
what had become of the companions of his 
early life of crime. The reply was, “They are 
hanged, your honor, except you and me.” 
Miss Angelina to Miss Belle, her rival, just 
now surrounded by-a bevy of admirers: “Oh 
dear, do tell me how you do your ham up so 
charmingly. What do you do it up onl It 
looks set intellectual?” Miss Belle, who wears 
her hair high: “Well I’ll tell you. dear. I 
generally do it up over brains, and (sweetly) 
I don’t think you eau buy them at the hair 
stores. ” 
“Fanny, you should uot beat your doll with 
that heavy stick. You will make all the saw¬ 
dust come out. of it,” said a Michigan mother 
to her little girl, who had placed her doll on 
the ground and was belaboring it with a base¬ 
ball bat. “I don’t care if all the saw-dust does 
come out of her,’ replied Fanny; “I don’t want 
people to say that my children turned out bad 
because I humored them too much.” 
As they were all coming out of the theater 
together,young Sypher accidentally trod on the 
dress of the pretty girl just abend. “Oh, shoo!” 
involuntarily exclaimed the pretty young girl, 
as she suddenly brought u; ~ Voung Sypher 
thought, he saw a dn»n< * for a nn-tfL “You 
needn’t shoo me,” lie simpered, smartly; “I'm 
no cow.” “No.” the pi etty girl returned, with 
a glance that pinned Tim up to the side of the 
lobby, “perhaps uot, Low, butyou will be when 
you grow up.” Then she swept on, while 
young Sypher was so astounded that he ac¬ 
tual^ forgot to light bis oakum-stuffed cigar¬ 
ette when he got outside. 
i.orfUttNco^dvntigiug. 
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Lj i o ms, 
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many prominent Breeders. See eireular, sent on ap¬ 
plication. T. W. LAWFOKI) & CO., 
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CABTKR’8 
IMPROVED NEEDLE HAY KNIFE. 
This knife has been tested with the most celebrated 
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which a hay knife Is used. 
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North Wayne Tool Co,£ 
HALLOW ELL, M A1NI 
GOOD *NEW r 
ID LADIES. 
Greatest, inducements ever of¬ 
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orders for our celebrated Tea. 
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THEY HAVE A EATEN!ED PROCESS 
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Are used by more fine butter makers and stock 
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SIX (101,1) Medal, and SEVENTEEN SILVER Medals awarded for superiority of process and 
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EUREKA and SKINNER'S BUTTER WORKERS, CARRIERS, PRINTS, and a full line of Creamery supplies. 
VERMONT FARM MACHINE CO., Bellows Falls, Vt. 
HOLSTEIN-FRIESIAN CATTLE! 
When writing mention Rim al New-YORKER. 
LARGEST HERD AND LARGEST AVERAGE MILK RECORDS. 
8 cows have averaged over au.nou lb*. in a year. 
5 cows have averaged over 19,00(1 lbs. in tgyear. 
10 cows have averaged over 18,(0) lbs. In a year. 
25 cows have averaged over 18.000 lb*. In a year. 
68, including 14 threeyear old* aud 21 two-year olds, have aver¬ 
aged 12, tot lbs. 5 oz. in o year. 
ni TTEIt 11 EC.’OIt DM. 
.% cows luiv, avarugvd 30 lbs. . .vz. In a week. 
!l eows have averaged 1« lbs. K oz. In a week. 
11 three-year-olds have averaged lit lbs. 2 oz. In n week 
15 two-year-oMs have averaged 10 lbs. 88-10 oz. In a week. 
This Is the herd from which to get foundation stock. Prices 
low for quality of stock. S.M IT MS, POWKI.Ii A LAMB. 
I.akksiiuc stock Farm, sv uactjsr. N. Y 
FOR REASONS WHY 
STOPBARD’S refribIratob 
With SURFACE SKIMMINC ATTACHMENT 
IB THE 
MOST POPULAR CREAMERY 
ON THR MARKET, AND FOR CIRCULARS OF THE 
BEST LINE OF DAIRY GOODS MADE, 
ADDSKBS 
MOSELEY & STODDARD MF’G CO. Poultney, Vt, 
to 
^EED&BARTON 
3? UNION SQUARE, NEW YORK, 
MANUFACTURERS OF 
ELECTRO GOLD AND SILVER PLATE, 
INVITE INSPECTION OF THEIR EXTENSIVE STOCK OF 
TABLE WARE. 
WHICH EMBRACES EVERYTHING REQUIRED FOR USE OR DECORATION OF 
THE TABLE: 
Coffee, Tea, Dessert, and Water Sets; 
Cake and Fruit Baskets; Meat, Vegetables and Baking Dishes; 
Epergnes, Candelabra, Spoons, Forks, Cutlery, Etc. 
THEY WOULD ALSO CALL ATTENTION TO TnEIR LARGE ASSORTMENT OF 
NOVELTIES IN 
Oxidized Silver, Gold Inlaid and Applied Work. 
AGRICULTURAL DEPARTMENT 
he »t 
en as follows: 
lu Agrtciiltu rm nud Applied Chemistry; 
Professors oalpvyelL, SChJlEFFF.K ami MW- 
BERRY: 8 Courses. . ..... 
Ill Botany, Horticulture n»d Arharicul- 
turct ProfuasorK PRENTISS and DUDLEY. 11 Courses. 
1 ii Entomology nud General Invertebrate 
Zoology; Professor COMSTOCK: 1 Courses. 
In Urology t Professor II. S. WILLIAMS: 8 Courses. 
In Veterinary Science? Professor LAW: 8 
Couww. 
In Applied Agriculture; Professor ltOBEUTS:C 
Courses. ... , , 
During the present year n course of lectures Is given 
on the Management of the Dairy by the Honorable L. 
B. Arnold, n similar course may bo expected next year. 
A veterinarian building Is to be erected In the course 
of the present- year, ami four rooms are to bo added to 
the Agileultoral Laboratory and Museum. 
The l'diversity Farm contains 2T.7 acres, of which 
&boun 125 acre* an* In Ullage, The farm emit al iin two 
vevy large barns, a dairy house, and an excellent herd 
of stock. AH the appliances of the Farm are used 
chiefly for the purposes of Illustrative and experiment¬ 
al tiusbamlr.!. 
Students who take the full course and pass the req¬ 
uisite examination* receive the degree ot Bachelor of 
Science in Agriculture. 
St udents not candidates for a degree are received 
without examination as •‘Special Students 1,1 aud are 
adtmth-d to any or all of the above courses, provided 
the applicant* are 18 or more years of age: and pro¬ 
vided rliey satisfy the Professors of Agriculture Of 
their disposition and ability to profit by Uie Instruc¬ 
tion. 
The next collegiate year begins September 1-1, 1886! 
To all student* of Agriculture "TUITION is Fiticu.” 
Full Information sent on application. (Questions 
concerning courses of study should be addressed to I. 
P. ROBERTS, Professor or Agriculture; all oilier ques¬ 
tions to K, L. AVI 1,1.1 A VIS, Tio-mm m il. 
Cornell University, Ithaca, N. Y„ May, 1886. 
LEGS & ARMS, 
(AKTIkU’lAL) 
WITH RUBBER HANDS AND FEET. 
The Mo:t liataral, Coniortihlo i Dutahio, 
Thousands in Daily l se. 
Now Potent* 4 Imparts::: Improroment*. 
I U. S. Gov't Manufacturer. 
Ill, Pamphlet of 160 Pages SENT ri?EE. 
A. A. MARKS,* 
701 Broadway, New York City. 
UNION WI1V1> M1UL. CO. 
Manufacturers of Sectional Geared 
and .Sectional Pumping Mills, etc. 
AH work guaranteed. 
Send for Catalogue and 
prices, mentioning this pa¬ 
per. Address 
UNION WIND HI I LI, M’F’G CO. 
ALBION. MICH.; or 
P. II. LOOMIH, General Eastern Aoent, 
11 CALEDONIA AVE., ROCHESTER, N. Y., Drawer 267. 
HORSEPOWERS 
LATEST IMPROVEMENT 
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- WOOD with Circular and 
Acknowledged 1^^ Cross-Cut Drug Saws, 
by all to be 
THE 
considering 
AS- EASY DRAFT, 
QUANTITY & QUALITY of Work. 
^Address A. W. GRAY'S SONS 
Patentees and Bole Manufacturers,* 
MIDDhETOWN SPRINGS, Vermont. 
U.S.STANDARD 
JONES 
O F 
3INCHAMT0N 
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Prleo LUt iximillon thlt aa4 
•adf.. JONES OF B1H0HAVJ0M, 
Blnghuintun, N.Y. 
7,000 Challenge Wind Mills. 
IN TTSK IN RVKItY State and Territory of 
i. f the l.’.H. 11 i a sect 1-"la 1 wheel, ha* 
’"“W-\ been made by us ' . i.V yi-ars.uud lia* 
.. I never blown down without tower 
■ 1 “ ■ -w ln> nklng, « record no other mill can 
Mll.I.S KENT <*N «« DAYS TEST 
REST PEED MILLS. CORN 
ETC. GOOD AGENTS 
show. 
TRIAL. 
NllKl,l.RU8rHHi HBBliJU 
W ANTED In nil unasslgned territory. Cat- 
nlogli, -a five. CHALLENGE WINDMILL 
A NR FEED MILL CO.. Hatarla. Kane L’u.111. 
PEARSON’S 
* FERTILIZERS. 
High Grade. Reliable. Lasting. 
Manufnotnml in dry condition, thereby assuring full 
weight or fertilizing material. Most flattering results 
where used side by side with other Preparations. 
Where there are no agents for these Fertilizers, orders 
direct to the manufacturer* will receive prompt atten¬ 
tion. JOHN M. PEARSON, Hudson, S. Y. 
Send for catalogue. 
Write for Circular and tell us wliat you want. 
H. W. PAYNE & HON, Drawer lwr>, Ki.miua, N Y. 
or address our New York Office. 
Eastern Agents, Htu., Clarke & Co.. Boston, Mass. 
our Patented Vertleal Boiler will uot prime. No 
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m i iimnYI By tlie 4'Iiuse Numeric*. Hou- 
W A N rH.ll 0*1 Energetic Men to solicit 
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business easily learned. Full liistruetlousglven. l*er- 
m ii lie nl Employment nml Good Pity. State age 
and previous occupation. Name this paper. New 
Kuglaml applicants address us at Boston; York State 
and West, al Geneva, N. Y., Penn., N. J.. and South, at 
Phlla. State age. K. G. CU ASK & CO, 
