New Ciitalomie* mailed ■ 
Boomer <* Bosoheri Pres * 0 *., ByrO - 
476 
THE RURAL WIW-YORKIR. 
ijuworoufi. 
It’s the tittles that tell—especially the 
little brothers and sisters. 
A little boy came to his mother recently 
and said: “Mamma, I should think that if I 
was made of dust I would get muddy inside 
when I drink.” 
The venerable Hopkins has been connected 
with Williams College for 66 years, and yet he 
cannot sign his name without making his 
Mark .—Lowell Courier. 
Husband— “That fence wants painting 
badly. I think I’ll do it myself. ” Wife—‘ ‘Yes, 
do it yourself if you think it wants to be done 
badly. ”—Texas Sip i »t gs. 
Now that the excitement attending the 
President’s marriage has somewhat subsided, 
let us return to the discussion of the question: 
“What sunk the Oregon V'—New Haven News. 
“Why, Allie dear, is that the way to begin 
your dinner?” asked a mother of her little 
daughter, as she began with the pie. “Well, I 
declare, Mamma, I was going to eat my dinner 
upside down wasn’t I ?”—Farm Journal. 
Husband (impatiently to wife)— “I told you 
I only wanted half a cup of tea, and, as usual, 
you’ve filled it to the top. Don’t you know 
what half full is?” Mother-in-law (grimly)— 
“She ought to by this time.”—A. H. Patriot. 
Miss Rose Elizabeth Cleveland is get¬ 
ting a reputation for bon mote, such as this: A 
Western visitor remarking in his free-and-easy 
way, “You hail from Buffalo, I believe?” she 
replied, “Yes, we hail from Buffalo, but we 
reign here!” 
YOUNG wife: “Mr. Poissom, I wish some 
nice smelts for dinner to-day.” Mr. Poissom: 
“Yes. madame; how many?” Young wife: 
One will be plenty, for only last week I or- 
derer two salmon and there was a great deal 
too much.— Life. 
“Where are you going?” said his fond 
mother to Johnny. “Going in swimming, 
mother.” “Going in swimming! why you 
silly boy you’ll get yourself wringing wet in 
such a shower as this; wait till the rain is 
over .”—Farm Journal. 
“My friend,” he said in solemn tones, to the 
passenger in the seat ahead, “are you a Chris¬ 
tian?” “Well, I hope so,” replied the passen¬ 
ger, somewhat startled. “Ah! then you have 
been baptized in the churchf’ “No, sir; I was 
baptized in the river. I'm a baptist.'—A ew 
York Times. 
A girl at Olympia, Oregon, threatens to 
sue her own father for breach of promise. 
She says the old gentleman first gave his con¬ 
sent to her marriage with her lover and then 
withdrew it, and that inconsequence her beau 
got tired of waiting and has gone off with an¬ 
other girl. 
A smoker presents his open cigar-case to 
his neighbor on the right. “Thanks, I don’t 
smoke.” He then turns to his neighbor on his 
left. “I don’t smoke; much obliged.” His 
wife whispers in his ear: “Are you not going 
to offer one to the captain?” “No, love; he 
smokes—I know he does.”— L'Echo Liberal. 
“It is my unalterable decision, Clara,” he 
said, firmly; “I cannot walk on the avenue 
with you if that poodle is to accompany us. 
You must choose between him and me. It 
rests with you, Clara, if our engagement shull 
be broken off.” “Oh, George!” the girl re¬ 
plied, and her face assumed an ashen hue; 
“this is all so sudden. You must give me 
time to think it over. One week, George, and 
you shall have your waswerJ'—Ingleside. 
A well-known minister was sent South 
from New Jersey a few years ago to labor 
among the colored people. They received him 
with many demonstrations of joy, and at the 
first meeting which he held one old colored 
preacher prayed for him with great earnest¬ 
ness, thus: “ 61 .rf>rd! bress dis yerdear brudder 
what's come down from de Norf to preach the 
gospil to us. ’Noint him wid de kerosene ile ob 
salvashin, and set him on fire.” 
Pi.$'un»ncou,$ 
WHITMAN’S REBOUND 
s c u u p a e r r 1o t r^A HUNGER PERPETUAL 
LEVER PRESS 
NOW MADE. K _ 
Received First Premium etN. Y. State Fair, In 
Jo I Mil, 1882, iHsa and law. including U'p <***”£ 
4l iji YfpH&l ana two Silver ovw Dodcrick 
nd others: also World's Fair at New Orleans and 
ulifornm fetate Fair. The moat rapid, erful 
nd durable press made ; puis over tea tens in car, 
ale every three minute*; fully warranted and 
ruled ed : three bales m oHy ot-l.c-r 
end for illustrated circulars. Also Horse Powers, 
'ider Mills, Corn Shelters, Feed Cutters, &c. 
VHITMAn AGRIC’L CO., St, Lomu, Mo. 
TIME TAP,Li 
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gg 
J I .-Ay Lj 
• fy ./fi 
iy 
SECOND-HAND INFORMATION. 
Indignant Ticket Agent: “I’ve told you three times already that the next traiu leaves at six- 
thirty. Don’t bother me any more 1” 
Inquisitive Passenger: “Shure, sor. it’s not fur meself oi m axin’this toime; itsfui a ladj 
outsoide, sor.” 
NURSERY STOCK—FALL 1886. 
The old and OVDAPIIQC MIIDQCDICQ Cometothel 
Reliable! UlllnuUuL NUnwEnlLU For the Fall of 
Come to the front 
For the Fall of 1886 
The Original Manufacturers 
ok 
RAW BONE SUPEIbFROtjPRATE. 
Reliable Denier* wanted 
iu unoccupied Territory. 
ENSILAGE 
OR THE 
System of PRESERVING Grass, Corn, Rye, 
Clover, Millet, etc., by cutting and pressing 
into a pit o;v£jilo. 
A Book jewing how to build a Silo and 
bow to f At, giving the opinion of leading 
agricult' /fete and farmers on the method and 
its resr i 
Price 60 cents. 
W. RICHARDSON, 
EAST -20ili STREET, NEW YORK. 
a£> 
& 
BUCKEYE 
liuJiwN STRAWBERRIES 
W T e will have our usual fine supply ready about July 
15. Catalogue containing correct descriptions or the 
best Gun and New varieties, with cultural directions, 
mailed free. ELLWANGER & BARRY, 
.Mount Hope Nurseries, ROCHESTER, N. Y. 
with the choicest Stock of their specialties. STANDARD APPLES STD. and DWARF PEARS, 
PLUMS it ml CHERRIES, ever offered to the public, all young, tlirilty andwell rooted. 
Also a very superior assortment of GENERA L N URSERY STOCK both 1'HI IT* A N I) OK- 
VMtTNT \ t, including all the popular OIt N A MENTA Ij Tit hES, SH It l US, and ROSES. , 
X All Nilreery in "n and Dealers arc cordially invited to Inspect this superior stock or correspond with us, before 
placing their orders for the coming Fail. 
SMITHS, POWELL <fc LAMB, Syracuse, N. Y. 
(When writing always mention Rural New-Yorker. ___ 
ROSSIS IRON ORE PAINT 
Is made from Red iron Ore mined in Rossie, N. Y.-Is toe best and most durable.Faint for Tin, Iron und Shingle 
Roofs, Barns, Fences, Farm Utensils, Etc., Will not crack or peel. 
Will protect roofs from sparks. Valuable for coloring mortar. Samples free. Ask prices of 
Rossie Iron Ore Paint Co., 
OGDENSBURG, N. Y. 
R AUCH’S $25 P HOSPHATE 
PURE RAW BONE MEAL, PURE BISSOLVED RAW BONES 
Tun Original Manufautubebb I BAUCH & SONS, Importers, 
ST IMPROVED 
s 
I 
mill and press. 
Occupies Lea*Suncr,htt»EarirerCapacity, 
in more Mumble, anil runs Ijighter than 
aVTill made. Buckeye DHIK Reeders. 
Cultivators, Rakes. Horse Hoes. Ban 
Tracks, etc. Scud for Circulars. 
P. P. MAST A, CO., Springfield, O. 
BRANCH HOUSES: 
Philadelphia, /‘a., St. Foufm^Jtto •. 
Omaha, Keb, % Peoria, III*, bt. Patti,Minn* 
KaViaaa Vitv, -Uo., San Francisco, Cal, 
Territory. PHILADELPHIA, PA. 
NEW CIDER MACHINERY. 
riii.iiimi.nr 
WAREHOUSE: 38 SO. MARKET ST., BOSTON, MASS. 
CAN’T BS BEAT! 
THE M STANDARD” 
WIRE NETTING POULTRY FENCE, 
A.ND 
PATENT METALLIC PICKET FENCE , 
FOR LAWNS. FARMS, ETC. 
Price of 2 in. Mesh, Mb-16 Wire, In Bales of ISO lineal 
reet only. 
7-8 OF ONE GENT PER SQUARE FOOT, 
Write for circular. 
Hatchers, Brooders, Poultry Houses, etc., fully de¬ 
scribed In our new catalogue, which will be sent on 
receipt of 10 cents. Circulars free. 
Brockner £. Evans, 
(Formerly 422 West St.) 52N V cscy Street, N. Y. 
U NION COLLEGE OF LA Ilf 
The Fall Term will begin Sept. 22d. horelr JJ 
eular address H. BOOTH. Cult AGO. ILL. 
WANTED, bv a Young Mon between 25 and HO 
years of age. a position with n first-class Farmer, one 
with whom he will haveun opportunity to leuru prac¬ 
tical farming. Best of reference given. Address 
“LAREDO,” Box 67, Williamsport, Pa. 
l 
■ltviiii 
5 
Acknowledged 
by all to be 1 
THE 
BEST 
considering 
*3- EASY DRAFT, DURABILITY, 
QUANTITY & QUALITY of Work. 
JTREE. Address fl. W. GRAY'S SONS 
* Patentkf.s and Sole Manufacturers/* 
MIDDLETOWN SPRINGS, Vermont. 
Perfect Mowing 
MACHINE KNIFE 
CRINDER. 
Weighs hut 18 Lbs, 
Can be carried Into the field nnd attached to Mow¬ 
ing Machine Wheel. Send for Descriptive Cata¬ 
logue. Agents wanted In every County. 
B. H. ALLEN CO., 189 Water St., New York. 
The Cold-Water Dip, 
(THYMO.CHKNOL,) 
A very htglilv concent rated, non poisonous fluid- 
mixes readily with cold or warm water—the simplest, 
safest, surest cure for TICKS, 
LIC E3, 
MANGE, SCAB, all Insect Pests, all Skin troubles, and 
man v other Diseases of Live Stock. Recommended by 
manv prominent Breeders. See circular, sent on ap¬ 
plication. T. W. LAW FORD & CO., 
Baltimore. Aid. 
READ THESE FACTS. 
Lighter Draft with Driver Riding Ilian ordinary Plow 
with Driver Walking . Turns square corner without 
backing. It la wholly constructed of Irou except 
tongue and front lever. .. . . . 
We claim nnd .nAR.vicrr.it that a Plow attached to 
the Sulkv and carrying the driver. Is from live to 100 
pounds lighter draft than the same Plow doing same 
work without the Sulky. Write for prices. 
ELKHART IRON WORKS, 
ELKHART, IND. 
Mention Rural New-Yorker. __ 
FARQUHAR VIBRAlING SEPARATOR. 
AlOGUE .* 
Addr.o, *. U. l AUlp llJiU, Y.rh, l 1 . 
fOrlnri ycur own Bone, 
mUIIIIU Meal, ©y.ter Shell*. 
OH *H4 M Flour and Corn 
goKmrKfcj y IJmuicfc'.sHLfVTvxsMxx.xj 
HVKL/ Jo < F. Wilson's Patent). lOO p» r 
cent, more matte lu keeping i»oiil- 
try. Also 1*0 W EH MILL** and FAB* 
FEED MILLS. ('Iranian and TeaUmonlals ut 
on ap”lcation. WHJSOXBKOS.. Easton, Pa, 
CIDER 
1 — ail _i j _j 4 __— vnrr 
CARTERS 
IMPROVED NEEDLE HAY KNIFE. 
This knife has beau tested with the most celebrated 
knives of other maker*, mid has proved an easier and 
faster cutter than any other. Its special excellence 
consists in n chisel edge tooth. It may be used for 
cutting hay in the mow, stack and bale; also for 
ditching, cutting pent, or for any other work Tor 
which a hay knife la used. 
Send for circular. 
rvenu lor circular. _ 
North Wayne Tool Co., 
HALLOWELL, MAINE, 
