THE RURAL NEW-YORKER. 
JULY 34 
♦ 
Snook’s wife loves to make bread, because it 
cleans her hands so beautifully.— Comic 
Weekly. 
GUEST— “I say landlord, your food is worse 
than it was last year.” Landlord—“Impossi¬ 
ble, sir!” 
. A-NEW story is called “The Editor’s Wal¬ 
let.” We have seen it. There is nothing 
in it.— Exchange. 
“Charming little pink-tipped, shell-like ears 
you have, Miss Totty. Did you ever have them 
pierced?” “No; but I have had them bored.” 
— Exchange. 
One of the greatest delights of hot weather 
to a married man is that his wife never says 
anything about a new sealskin sacque.—Wasft- 
inyton Critic. 
Jane Marsh Parker has written a book 
which she calls the “Midnight Cry.” We 
have not read it, but we know all about it aud 
Jane has our sympathy. The cats bother 
us too. 
A Lady somewhere out West advertises for 
a gentleman for breakfast and tea.. Short¬ 
horn wants to know if she intends to make 
only two meals of him? Oh, the cannibal! 
—Comic Weekly. 
“Grandpa,” said Teddy, as the old gentle¬ 
man woke up from a loud sounding alter din¬ 
ner nap, “If you’d give your nose a spoonful 
of paregoric don’t you think you could put it 
too sleep to?”— Exchange, 
A country paper in describing the effects 
of a squall upon a canal-boat, says that “when 
the gale was at its highest, the unfortunate 
craft heeled to larboard, and the captain and 
another barrel of whisky rolled overboard.” 
Editor (to foreman).—“What cuts have we 
up stairs?” Foreman.—“None, sir, but a cut 
of Lydia Pinkham. ” Editor.—“H-m. Well, 
trim it up a little and put it at the top of 
the article on Ludwig of Bavaria.”— Ex¬ 
change. 
“Do you know the prisoner, Mr. Jones?” 
* “Y^s, to the bone.” “What is his character?” 
“Didn’t know that he had any.” “Does he 
live near you?” “So near that he only spent 
five cents for fire-wood in eight years.”— Com¬ 
ic Weekly. 
High Art Appreciated.— Amateur artist, 
painting a bunch of apple blossoms, to small 
boy looking on.—“Well, Tommy, do you know 
what they.are?” Small boy, with absolute 
certainty in his tone—“Yes, inarm; heDS.”— 
Boston Commercial Bulletin. 
The strawberry is boycotted on the Pacific 
coast because it is picked by Chinamen. What 
if the Chinamen should take to making whis¬ 
ky, would, that be boycotted, too? It is a 
most interesting question, and we should like 
very much to see the experiment tried .—New 
York Cfraphic. 
“I wonder why I can’t make my kite fly,” 
wailed the little brother of the High School 
girl. “It looks to me,” replied Mildred, “as 
though its caudal appendage were dispropor¬ 
tionate to its superficial area. ” “I don’t think 
that’s it,” said Jim. “I think it’s tail is too 
ligh t. ”—Pit tsburg Ch run icle. 
A Waterbury gentleman was surprised 
while out on a drive on the Wolcott road re- 
cently by the conduct of a boy whopi he asked 
to ride. The boy refused obstinately, and 
when prevailed upon for a reason, said he ex 
pected a whipping when he got home, and wr 
in no hurry.— American. 
The small boy who furnishes the histor 
with a good deal of data watches his baby • 
ter with constant curiosity. “She do c t 
know anything,” he said. “She can’t <><c; 
she can’t think; she cun’t read.” He 1 1 
at her a moment, meditating on his ow t*. •l ) o- 
riority, aud then said, pityingly: ‘To- Jttle 
thing; she’s never been to a circus !”—Toledo 
Blade. 
ST. GEORGE’S 11 ALL for BOYS and YOUNG 
MEN, ST. GEORGE’S, Mb. Unsurpassed; »230 to f300. 
PROP. J KINK A R, AM., Prill. 
NION COLLEGE OF LA 
The Fall Term will begin Sept. 22d. For clr- f f 
cular address H. BOOTH, Chicago, III. 
NOTRE DAME OF MARYLAND, 
Collegiate Institute tor You ntr Ladles and Prepara¬ 
tory School ror Little Girls, EMBLA P. O., Three 
Miles from Haiti more. IUd. Conducted by the Sis¬ 
ters of Notre Dame. Send for Catalogue. 
7,000 Challenge Wing Mills, 
IN W. IN 1C VICKY State and Territory oi 
the IT, S. It is ii seetliotal wheel, hu 
tow n mode Lynx' . ,o vi ms,andImi 
never blown down without tower 
brisking, a record no other mill can 
show. Mli.I.gRENT «>.V8<> HAYS TEST 
TRIAL. BEST FEED MILLS, COHN 
811 ELLERS, ETC. GOOD AGENTS 
WANTED In nil unassigned territory. Cat¬ 
alogues free. CHALLENGE WINDMILL 
AND PEED MILL 00.,Bataria. Kane Co.Ul 
NURSERY STOCK-FALL 1886. 
The old and 
Reliable! 
SYRACUSE NURSERIES 
Come to the front 
For the Fall of 1886 
with the choicest Stock of their specialties, STANDARD APPLES, STD. and DWARF PEAKS, 
PLUMS and till EKHIKS, ever offered to the public, all young, tliritty aud well rooted. 
Also a very superior assortment or GENERAL NURSERY STOCK, both FRUIT AND OR¬ 
IS AMENTA L Including all the popular O UN A WENT A L TREES. Sll RUBS, and ROSES. 
All Nurserymen and Dealers arc cordially Invited to inspect this superior stock or correspond with us, before 
placing their orders for the coming Kail. 
SMITHS, POWELL & LAMB, Syracuse, N. Y. 
(When writing always mention Rural New-Yorker. 
The Phosphate being derived from Bones, the Ammo¬ 
nia from Blood and Meat, makes them peculiarly effi¬ 
cient. Send for circular on the CULTIVATION OF 
WHEAT. 
WILLIAMS, CLARK & CO.’S 
HIGH GRADE 
BONE FERTILIZERS 
FOR 
WHEAT 
AND 
SEEDING TO GRASS. 
°officeI (Cotton Exchange Building, New York. 
The Latest Improvement 
IN 
Traction Engines. 
The only Engines where the power 1* practically 
and successfully applied to the four truck wheels. 
Exceeds all other Traction Engines In pulling and 
steering through mud holes, Muni, or utiv soft or uu 
even ground, or onauy road. Is the result accumulat¬ 
ed from a third of a century of study and practical 
experience In the manufacture of 
PORTABLE, 
Agricultural & Stationary Steam Engines. 
With determined policy to build only the best ma¬ 
chinery from the best materials, and In the best 
manneb ok construction, and with Continued Im¬ 
provements. have attained the manxier standard 
& excellence of workmanship, simplicity of design, 
and capacity of power. 
In addition to our standard Engines we now offer 
the llmi Road Engine which tins the Traction Power 
practically aud efficiently applied to the four truck 
Wheels, and whlb so applied to each wheel Independ¬ 
ently, the forward tixlo l* under tull control of the 
steering apparatus, 
Descriptive catalogue will be sent on application. 
WOOD, TABER & MORSE, 
Eaton, Madison Co., N< Y. 
CARTER'S 
IMPROVED NEEDLE HAY KNIFE. 
This knife has been tested with the most celebrated 
knives of other makers, aud lias proved un easier aud 
faster cutter than any other. Its special excellence 
consist* In a chisel edge tooth. It may be used for 
cutting hay In the mow, stack aud bale; also for 
dltclilng, cutting pout, or for any other work for 
which a hay (mural* used, 
Send for circular. 
North Wayne Tool Co.. 
HALLOWELL, MAINE. 
WHITMAN’S 
GUARANTEED 
SUPERIOR to»»> 
LEVER PRESS 
NOW MADE. 
NEW PATENT 
REBOUND 
PLUNGER PERPETUAL 
teceived First Premium at N. Y Slate hair, In 
», ihhi, ikh" m*:t and 1683. including tlm Grand 
Id Medal and two Silver Medals, over I led crick 
t others ; also World’s Fair at New Orleans, and 
liforula state Fair. The most rapid, powerful 
d durable press made ; puts over ten tons In ear* 
le every three minutes; fully warranted and 
Jtected : three bales to any other press’s two. 
ml for illustrated circulars. Also Horse Powers, 
ler Mills, Corn HliellOT*, Feed (Titters, Ac. 
HITMAN AGKIC’L CO.. St. Louis. lUo. 
THE BEST CATTLE FASTENING! 
SMITH'S 
SELF-ADJUSTING SWING STANCHION, 
The only Practical Swing .Stanchion Invented. Thou¬ 
sands lu use. Illustrated Circular free. Manufactured 
by BROOKS & PARSONS. Addison. Sleubeu Co. N. Y. 
CDllU’t? Star Churns. Rapid Ice Cream Freezers, 1 m 
orftlR u proved Tree Tuba, all made of CKDAR. 
nunnuo Send for Illustrated circular and prices 
liHUKIV L’lcnrnl <V Dunbar. Philadelphia. Pa 
UNION WIND M1I.LCO. 
Manufacturers of Sectional Geared 
and Sectional Pumping Mills, etc. 
All work guaranteed. 
send for Catalogue aud 
prices, mentioning this pa¬ 
per. Address 
UNION WIND M I LL M’F’G CO. 
ALBION. MICH.; or 
F. 11. LOOM IS, ukniciul Eastern Aof.nt, 
11 CALEDONIA AYE., ROCHESTER, N. Y., Drawer 287. 
fWILL INSURE YOUR HOGS! 
DR. JOS. HAAS’ 
HOG AND POULTRY REMEDY 
[None Genuine without this Trade Mark.l 
Is the only Frnctieal Preventive of the so- 
called Swine Plague. 
If used in proper Quantities, It will 
1. Prevent Disease; 
2. Arrest Disease; 
3. Pay for itself with the increased pork it 
will put upon the hogs. 
AS AN EVIDENCE OF FAITH 
In my Remedy, I make the following offer; 
I will insure herds of swine of not less than 
one hundred in number against disease, at a 
small fee per head, provided they are fed my 
Remedy under my direction, and prove upon 
examination prior to contract that they are in 
a healthy condition, aud neither inbred, close- 
bred, or the progeny of such. 
Wit AT IK SAID OK THE REMEDY. 
"It has stopped the hogs dying and Improved their 
appetite."—K, C. Qoldbborodoh. Easton. Md. 
"Have used the reuieuy with success.”—D. G. Bar 
her, Easton. Md. 
Tills medicine has been thoroghly tested and Its me¬ 
rits established on the eastern shore.’’—Record aud 
Gazette. Pocomoke, Md. 
"I will not be t\ Ulioul Hans’s ilog Remedy If It costs 
three times the pnatenl price.”—JOHN Castin, Grant 
City, Mo. 
"VVe would not rfck feeding a pen of hogs without 
the remedy.”—W hite A Co , ulbsontou, Pa. 
"1 would uot think of raising hogs without It.”—J. 
M. Ku.swortu, Martinsville. Wls. 
"It gives satisfaction every time.’’— J. G. Bartlett 
A Son, Sunoook. N H. 
"U lias net er fat loti to arrest the disease yet. ’—Jones 
& Musselman, St Parts O. 
"i have sold over worlh, and am pleased to 
say that it bos given good satisfaction."—M elle Wil¬ 
liams, Druggist, Ta> lorvllie, III. 
1 be Remedy ean be procured of all druggists, or 
from uiy Laboratory, upon receipt of price. 
Prices, sjej,50, S 1 •25, and 50 cents per package. 
25 pound cans, > 12.50. 
JOS. HAAS, V.S., 
Member of Indiana State Veterinary Med. 
Association, 
INDIANAPOLIS, INDIANA. 
The Cold-Water Dip, 
THYMO.CW USOG,) 
A very highly concentrated, non poisonous fluid- 
mixes readily with eold or warm water—the simplest, 
safest, surest cure for TICKS, 
LIC E 3 , 
MANGE, SCAB, all Insect Pests, all Skin troubles, and 
many other Diseases ot Livestock. Recommended by 
many prominent Breeders. Sec circular, sent on ap¬ 
plication. T. \V. LA \V FORD A CO., 
Dalttinore, Md. 
PULVERIZING 
HARROW, 
r \Clod Crusher and Leveler. 
The Best Tool in the world for preparing 
I ■Wheat. Ground aud for Sommer Fallows, 
™ ™ NASH &. UltO., Sole Manufacturers, 
Harrisburg, I*a., & Millington, New Jersey 
y.B .—“ Tiltayc is Manure " and other essays sent 
free to parties who name (his pup, r. 
HORSEPOWERS 
LATEST IMPROVEMENT 
Machines for THRESHING and CLEAN¬ 
ING GRAIN? also Machine* for SAWING 
Circular and 
Acknowledged Cr oss-Cut Drug Saws, 
by all to be 
THE 
considering 
EASY DRAFT, 
QUANTITY & QUALITY ofWorki, 
FRKI?. C ^Addn-'s* A. W. GRAY’S SONS 
$ Patjcmtees and Sole Manufacturem/' 
M1DDLKTOWN SPRINGS, Vermont. 
H0CTORD 1 vfliEYENSILAGE& 
11 1> J)RY FORAGE COTTER 
•pnfrKjyT’lCriia Power. 
AWES’* 
PLOW CO., 
Cre.trr (lac 
V HALL, 
ii ml 55 
St., 
Manufacturers of Agricultural implements and 
Machines. 
AGENTS WANTED. 
Send for Circulars and ou 
Illustrated Pamphlet. 
Write for Circular and toll us what you want. 
B. W. PAYNE & SON, Drawer 1005, ELMIRA, N Y. 
New York Office. 107 LIBERTY STREET. 
Eastern Agents, Hill, Clarke & Co.. Boston, Mass. 
| Our Patented Vertical Boiler will not prime. No 
danger of burning flues. 
