448 
THE RURAL NEW-YORKER. 
June 22, 1901 
Humorovts. 
Before the cyclone came along 
He owed a full month’s rent; 
It moved him sixty miles; and now 
He doesn’t owe a cent! 
—Atlanta Constitution. 
Church: “Is your wife thirty yet?’ 
Gotham: “Yes, yet.”—Yonkers States¬ 
man. ^ 
“Does running realJ 5 /^elop and ex¬ 
pand the physique?” 2,uite likely, I 
know that even in t se of a hoard 
bill the more it runs J^oigger it gets.” 
—Philadelphia Timf 
“Have you got a^^'jndensed milk,” 
asked the man at ^ ^ate. “No, sir,” 
replied the driver'^<^ .he milk wagon 
imperturbably. “NotHin’ but the expand¬ 
ed kind.”—Chicago Tribune. 
Lady: “Little boy, are you sure this 
butter is clean?” Boy from the Coun¬ 
try: “I low as how it ought to be. Ma 
and Sis set up half the night picking the 
specks out of it.”—What to Eat. 
Mrs. Hoon: “Why are people who get 
married often called the ‘contracting 
parties?’ ” Mr. Hoon: “I don’t know 
about the bride, but think how small 
the groom usually looks!”—Puck. 
Stout Man (struggling and crowding 
to force himself on to the packed step 
of a Broadway open car): “Humph! 
What’s this—the hog car?” Elderly 
Passenger: "Yes! Jump right on.”—Life. 
Mike (to chemist): "The docthor said: 
‘Take wan ov these pills three toimes a 
day.’ I took wan av thim wanst, but 
the man doesn’t live thot kin take wan 
av them three toimes!”—Detroit Free 
Press. 
Teacher: "How many genders have 
we?” Tommy (aged six): "Three. Mas¬ 
culine, feminine and neuter.” Teacher: 
"Correct. Now, tell me the gender of 
an egg.” Tommy: “Can’t till it’s 
hatched.”—Colorado Weekly Times. 
Visitor: “What was the matter with 
the man they just brought in?” Doctor: 
"Stuck his head through a pane of 
glass.” Visitor: “How did he look?” 
"His face wore an injured expression.” 
—St. Louis and Canadian Photographer. 
"I UNDERSTAND that he has long been 
a student of political economy,” said the 
visitor. “He has,” said Senator Glucose, 
“and his economy in politics has kept 
him out of office. He thinks he can be 
elected without spending a cent.”— 
Brooklyn Life. 
"I NEVER take advantage of anybody 
who is not ready to take advantage of 
some one else,” said the Wall Street 
manipulator. “Shake hands,” said the 
stranger impulsively. “Those are my 
sentiments precisely. I’m a green goods 
man.”—Washington Star. 
Miss Gull: “Mr. Joakley was telling 
me about a remarkable tadpole he has 
in his aquarium.” Miss Gill: “What 
was remarkable about it?” Miss Gull: 
“Why, he says when he got it it was 
only an inch long, but in a week or so 
it had grown two feet.”—Philadelphia 
Press. 
“Yes, I’m pretty well fixed,” remarked 
the Western millionaire. "I began life 
a barefoot boy and”— “Of course, but 
is that urusual out your way?” “Well, 
yes. I’m rather an exception.” “Well, 
well! i know itis quite common in the 
West for one to die with his boots on, 
but I didn’t know you folks were born 
that way, too.”—Philadelphia Press. 
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1st .—Did you ever use “international Stock Food” for Horses, Cattle, Sheep, Hogs, 
Colts, Calves, Lambs or Pigs? 2d.— How many head do you own? 3d. —Name this paper. 
THIS BOOK CONTAINS 183 FINE, LARGE. COLORED ENGRAVINGS 
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and the cover is a beautiful live stock picture printed in 6 brilliant colors. In Horse Department arc fine engravings of 
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nUNEAPOLIS, BINN., 17. 8 . A. 
“ 0. K.” POTATO 
The “O. K." 
Potato Harvester 
can be seen at the 
Pail Anicriean 
Exposition. 
DIGGER 
{Patent applied for.) 
Sent on trial. Test it in your own field. If it 
does the work, pay for it. If it fails, reject it. 
We want a good, live, hustling man in each township in potato section to take 
orders. One who has a good team and can and will spend time enough 
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D. Y. HALLOCK & SONS, Box D 805, YORK, PA. 
Please mention box number. 
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WOOD SAWS. 
One & two-horse Thrashing Outfits. Level p | ITT C D C 
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ELLIS KEYSTONE AGR’LWORKS.Pottstown, Pa 
F. L. MAINE, General Agent, Wlllet, N. T. 
Why Not 
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GRANT-FEUKIS COMPANY, Troy, N. Y. 
Thirt It to rscirl 
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The BEST Threshing Outfit 
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perteclly. Catalogue of EnciDes, Threshing MBcbinGry, ^ 
Saw Mills and Agricultural Implements FREE. 
A. B. Farquhar Co., Ltd. 
York, Pa. 
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bargain PRICES 
PERFECTION PREPARED FELT ROOFING. 
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Send for Illustrated Catalogue and 
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Charter Gas Engine Co., Box 26, Sterling, Hi. 
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CONTENTS. 
The Rural New-Yorker, June 22, 1901. 
FARM TOPICS. 
Asparagus in New Jersey.4:13 
Agricultural Education .;.435 
Notes on Farm Machinery.435 
Useful Hay Tools.435 
Jottings By the Way.437 
A City Man Turns Farmer.437 
“Take a Day Off and Rest”.437 
Crimson Clover .43S 
Hope Farm Notes.439 
Crop Prospects .441 
Western Crop Notes.441 
Government Crop Report.441 
The Potato Crop.444 
LIVE STOCK AND DAIRY. 
Selling Chicks from the Incubator.434 
Torture or Comfort in the Check-Rein..4.35 
Cream Will Not Churn.436 
More Oleo Rogues Caught.444 
The Chicken Crop.445 
Feeding Calves .446 
Some Chicken Notes.446 
The Best Breed of Poultry.44b 
Varieties of Ducks.44b 
Farm and Dairy Notes. 44 ( 
Brief Dairy Notes.447 
Egg-Hatching Record . 447 
HORTICULTURE. 
Everybody’s Garden .434 
Live Stock in Sprayed Orchards. 434 
Wood Veneer Tree Protectors. 4 . 3 b 
Currants Dropping Fruit. 43 b 
Dry Rot in Apples. 
Various Questions . 
The Moth Trap... 
Notes froift the Rural Grounds. 43 b 
Experiments with Tulips. 
Forcing Rhubarb in Winter. 
438 
438 
Grafting Cherries . 
New York Fruit Display at the Pan- 
American Exposition ... 
Fruit in the Lower Hudson Valley.445 
Fertilizer for Rabbits. 
WOMAN AND HOME. 
From Day to Day. 
The Rural Patterns. 
Household Expenses .. 
Some Seasonable Recipes. 
Rural Recipes .. 
When Apples Were Scarce. 
The Children’s Playhouse.^ 
Laundry Conveniences . 
MISCELLANEOUS. 
How and What New Yorkers Eat.434 
The Cash Cost of Life. 
Not Much Stuffing.. 
Editorials ..... 
Events of the Week.^ 
Markets . 444 
Business Bits . 445 
Book Bulletin . 445 
Market Briefs . 443 
Humorous . 
