i6o 
THE RURAL NEW-YORKER 
February 2.'), 1 ‘.)or>. 
HUMOROUS 
There was an old person of Woking, 
Whose mind was perverse and provoking; 
lie sat on a rail. 
With his head in a pail; ■ 
That illusive old person of Woking. 
—Edward Lear. 
“Isn’t the doctor's wife beautiful? She; 
"Quitep 
And the doctor has a bill like that ob 
IS 
has a neck like that of a swan; 
so 
a pelican.”—Judge. 
Tired Mother (to restless child) : 
“Now you set still! I’ve druv you ten 
miles to enjoy this entertainment, and you 
shall enjoy it if I have to pull every hair 
out of your head!”—Life. 
Charles : “Your uncle is a very relig¬ 
ious man, I understand?” Henry: “Oh, 
yes, indeed! He positively hates every¬ 
body who belongs to any other church 
than his own.”—The Ram's Horn. 
“I suppose it’s always hog-killing time 
in your town, Miss Packer?" sneered the 
New Yorker. “O! yes,” replied the fair 
visitor from Cincinnati, “but don't let that 
keep you from visiting us. We always 
protect our guests.”—Philadelphia Press. 
Mr. Fathead: “Oh, yes, children and 
dogs can always be relied on to—er—er 
express their feelings without deceit. Now, 
Tommy, come here, my boy, and tell us 
what you think of me. (Silence.) Come, 
speak out, little man, don't be afraid. 
(Still silence.) Why won't you tell us 
what you think of me ?” Tommy: “ ’Cos 
1 don't want a licking.”—Puck. 
“How far do you travel in crossing the 
ocean from Liverpool to New York?” 
asked the instructor at the night school. 
“Four thousand miles.” “Oh, no. Think 
again.” "That's right,” persisted the 
shaggy-haired pupil. “I know the book 
says 3,000 miles, an’ that's what it is in 
a straight line, but I'm countin’ in the ups 
and downs. I've been acrost."—Credit 
Lost. 
Rapid disappearance of coal from his bin 
alarmed Major Higgins, and he deter¬ 
mined to trace it. He questioned the man 
who tended the furnace. “ 'Rastus,” he 
asked, “where do you reckon my coal has 
disappeared to?” Erastus scratched his 
head thoughtfully. “Wal, suh,” he re¬ 
plied, “Ah—Ah—Ah—Ah reckon dem 
squihels done took it.” “Squirrels? Take 
coal? Nonsense!” “Yasseh, squihels, 
Major Higgins. Dat was nut coal, suh.” 
—Chicago News. 
When you write advertisers mention The 
R. N.-Y. and you'll get a quick reply and 
“a square deal." See guarantee, page 18. 
BUY DIRECT FROM FACTORY, BE8T 
MIXED PAINTS 
AtWHOLESALE PRICES, Delivered FREE 
For Houses, Barns, Roofs, all colors, and SAVE Dcricf 8 
•refits, In use 61 y*ars. Officially Endorsed by the 
Orange. Low prices will surprise you. Write for Samples. 
0. W. INQERSOLL. 246 Plymouth St.. Brooklyn, N. Y. 
o 
° ALL _ 
S earing 
— Wings with 
^ \e ease of, 
pendulum 
t-> 
GOOD INCOMES FOR ALL 
85to 30 per cent commission 
to get orders for our celebrated Teas, 
Coffees, Spices, Extracts and Baking 
Powder. Beautiful Presents and Coupons 
with every purchase. CHARGES PAID 
For prompt attention address Mr. J. J. D 
care of 
THE GREAT AMERICAN TEA CO., 
P. O. Box 289, 31-33 VeseySt. ,New York. 
Not A Decent Wire Fence Made 
but that would be better if stretched on our 
stool posts. Hundreds of local fence agents 
have been handling them for years, some 
selling over 81,000 worth each season. In 
many cases the posts sell the fence. Not 
necessary to carry In stock, but order as 
wanted." Every fence agent should send us 
his address and get full particulars. 
BOND STEEL POST COMPANY, 
Adrian, Michigan._ 
You Don’t Buy Trouble 
Hut Wash Day Comfort and 
Pleasure when you buy the 
Acme Washing Machine 
Built right, works right and IS ALL right. Washes 
thoroughly finest fabrics or heaviest woolens. No 
center post to stain or tear the clothes. Steam-tight 
top—simply raise it and lean it against handle to 
drain—no lifting from tub. Strong, well-braced hard¬ 
wood stand for tub, basket and wringer. Honestly 
constructed, best materials, best workmanship, hand¬ 
somely finished. Saves your health, strength and 
patience. Try it — if it does not do — More Work, 
Better Work, with Less Effort than any other 
machine made, your money will be refunded. 
Jf your dealer hasn't the Acme, write us to-day. 
Acme Washing Machine Company 
Columbus, Ohio 
THE 
Great Western Apron 
Manure Spreader 
CDDCJHIC all kinds of manure, straw stack bottoms and commercial fertilizer regard- 
wiViLmUw less of their condition. Spreads as much in a day as 15 men can by hand. Spreads the 
largest load in 2 to 4 minutes. Makes the same amount of manure go three time* as far and 
produce better results; makes all manure fine and immediately available for plant food. 
MAll DllkiPIIADI C DAVE forms a hopper, holds all hard chunks in contact 
llUll"DUIlunADLC llAIVC With beater until thoroughly pulverized. 
Ciini CCC ADDnU is one contin ous apron, (not a % apron) therefore always ready fo 
CIlULCdO ArnUII load. You don’t have to drive a certain distance to pull it back 
into position after each load or wind it back by hand; it is a great advantage In making long hauls. 
TI1CDC 1C lin C CAD III about our Endless Apron to break and cause trouble, 
I flCIfC Iw I1U U C A HIIIII it is always up out of the way of obstructions as it 
does not extend below axle. Spreads evenly from start to finish and cleans out perfectly clean, 
unnn nun run CATC keeps manure away from beater while loading; pre- 
V1UUU AIYU CI1U IIA I C vents choking of beater and throwing out a bunch 
when starting and acts as wind shield when spreading. It has a graduating lever and can be regulated 
while in motion to spread thick or thin, 3 to 25 loads per acre. 
I IPIIT nDA CT because the load is nearly equally balanced on front and rear axles. 
LIU || | || IIAI I The team is as near the load as it can work. Front and rear axles are 
the samelength and wheels track; beater shaft runs in ball and socket bearings, therefore no friction. 
Beater is 28 inches in diameter, seat turn* over when loading. Machine turnsin its own length. 
£i|H[}| | n 1 TV There are only two levers on our machine. One which raises the hood, 
OllflrLIul I I locks it and throws the machine in gear at the same time. It can then 
be thrown in and out of gear without lowering the hcod. One lever which changes 
feed to spread thick or thin, making it so simple that a boy who can drive a team can handle it. 
CTDCUPTII Alin nilDADII ITV is one of the most important points to be 
QlAERilkfl AHU UUnADILI I I considered in a manure spreader. TheGreat 
Western lias a good, strong, durable wheel. Extra strong spoke and rim, heavy steel tires. Strong, well 
braced box with heavy oa,; sill. Oak tongu., hickory d< ubletrees, malleable castings, gears and 
sprockets all keyed on. Galvanized hood. Every part is made extra strong, regardless of cost. Itis 
made forthe man who wants the best; made In four sizes, 30, 50, 70 and 100 bushel capacity. 
PIIIDRUTCE Should any part break, wear out or get out of order within one year wo 
IlUAnAn I EC replace free of charge. Send for free catalogue, showing latest improve¬ 
ments. It tells how to apply manure to secure best results. 
SMITH MANURE SPREADER CO. 
15 S. Clinton Street, CHICAGO, ILL, 
TILE DRAINED LAND IS MORE PRODUCTIVE 
. creases the value. Acres of swampy land reclaimed and made fertile. 
[B ~T~t f = lr r 1 Jackson's Round Drain Tile meets every requirement. We also make Sewer 
1L> 1 ILL j pipe, Red and Fire Brick, Chimney Tops, Encaustic Side Walk Tile, etc. Write 
-for what you want and prices. JOHN H. JACKSON. 78 Third Are., Albany, N.Y. 
A Chain Drive 
Mower That Meets 
Every Condition of Grass 
or Ground 
Cuts any kind of grass, on any kind of ground. 
There’s scarcely a condition that 'ts wide range 
of adjustments will not meet to >erfection. Easy 
on the horses—easy on the driver. A combination 
of greatest strength, lightest possible draft, 
smoothest cutting and wearing qualities that has 
won a host of farmer friends. Its roller bearings— 
long, wood pitman—babbitted pitman box—cutting 
apparatus that will not clog—evenly divided 
draft—a perfect foot lift, are points worth 
considering. Our free Mower Folder fully 
explains and illustrates these 
superior advantages—tells how it meets 
every need with least labor and power. 
They are points you ought to know before 
buying a mower and it costs but a postal to 
get them. Send today and we will send wit h 
folder our general catalog showing all 
the Johnston farm implements—the 
Grand Prize line at St. Louis. 
WE LEAD THE WORLD 
We are the largest manufac¬ 
turers of Grooved and Plain 
Tire Steel Farm Wagon 
Wheels in America. We 
guarantee our patent 
Grooved Tire Wheels to 
be the best made by anybody 
anywhere. Write us. 
HAVANA METAL WHEEL CO. 
BOX 17 HAVANA, ILL. 
WHAT DO YOU SAY? 
Several hundred thousand farmers say that 
the best investment they ever made was 
when they bought an 
Electric Ha Wagon 
Low wheels, wide tires; easy work, light draft. 
We’ll sell you a get of the best steel wheels 
made for your old wagon. Spoke united with 
hub. guaranteed not to break nor work loose. 
Send for our catalogue and save money. 
ELECTRIC WHEEL CO.. Box 88. Quincy,III. 
B0WSHER MILLS/ 
(Sold with or without Elevator.) 
For Every Variety of Work. 
Hare conical shaped grinders. Different 
front all others. Handiest to operate and 
LIGHTEST RUNNINC. 
T nlzes—2 to 25 horse power. One style for 
windwheel use. (Also moUe Sweep 
Grinders—Geared mid Plain.) 
V P. N. B0WSHER, South Bend, Ind. 
UNITED STATES 
Importing Canadian 
WHEAT 
la Soiv a Fact. Get a 
JOHNSTON MOWER N0.9 
HOMESTEAD 
WESTERN 
CANADA 
or buy some of the best wheat lands on 
the continent, and become a producer. 
This is the era of $1.00 wheat. 
The overate yield of wheat this year 
will be about 20 bushels to the acre. 
The oat and barley crop will also yield 
abundantly. Splendid climate good, 
schools and churches, excellent market¬ 
ing facilities. 
Apply for information to Superinten¬ 
dent of Immigration, Ottawa, Cun., or to 
THOS. DUNCAN, 
Canadian Government Agent, Syracuse, N.Y. 
Mention this paper. 
Copyright**!. 
“A Dog on Good Scale.” 
You Can Save From $30. to $50. 
a 
— BY BUYING OUR — 
KNODIG” 
No Pit to Dig. 8 Inches Over All. Steel Frame. 
This Scale is complete when it leaves our 
factory, with the exception of floor planks. 
WRITE FOR FREE CATALOGUE. 
NATIONAL PITLESS SCALE CO., 
Dept. Z 5 Kansas City, Mo. Branch, Dayton, 0. 
all one cylinder engines; revolutionizing gas power. Costs Less to Bay a 
tlonary ortraction. Mention »his paper. SEND FOR CATALOGUE. THE TEMPLE P 
UNTIL YOU INVESTIGATE 
“THE MASTER WORKMAN,” 
_____ _ a two-cylinder gasoline engine superior to 
Costs Less to Buy and Less to Run. Quickly, easily started. No vibration. Can be mounted on any wagon at_small_cost—portable,sta- 
UMP CO-. Mfnt.. Meairher & 16th St«.. Chicago. THIS I .. 
DON’T BUY GASOLINE ENGINES 
ckly, easily started. No vibration. Can be mounted oi _ 0 —. _ . 
P CO«i Meagher &, 16th St#., Chicago, THIS IS OUR FIFTY-FIRST YEAR. 
A 50-ACRE CROP IN 40-ACRE TIME 
can be harvested with Walter A. Wood harvesting machinery. The labor and time saving devices of 1904 have been further improved for 1905 . We are 
the oldest independent manufacturers of harvesting machinery in the world. If you want the best machinery, the kind that lasts, you need 
WALTER A. WOOD MACHINERY 
If you would know more about their Mowers, Binders, 
Reapers, Hay Tedders, Rakes, ask for the new catalog, which fully describes their complete line, 
les rough or smooth ground with equal ease. We will direct you to the nearest agency where yc 
Century” Binder js the greatest binder of the age. Handles rough _ 0 ___ _ _ _ 
Repairs furnished for Walter A. Wood machinery of any date, no matter how ancient. Full stocks of various parts carried at all central points. 
WALTER A. WOOD MOWING AND REAPING MACHINE CO., Hoosick Falls, N. Y. 
The “New 
you can see it. 
