6-48 
THE RURAL NEW-YORKER 
May 22, 1909 
HUMOROUS 
“Pa!” “Well?” "What’s a fortifi- 
cation.” ‘‘A big fort.” “Well, pa, is 
a ratification a big-” “Willie, go to 
bed at once.”—Cleveland Leader. 
Little Gladys (on seeing the pieces 
of china on the floor) : “Oh, mama! 
Just see the lovely jigsaw puzzle 
Mary’s made out of one of the new 
plates!”—Puck. 
“When they summon you to court. 
Hiram, will you corroborate my as¬ 
sertions?” “I dasn’t' say I’ll go as fur 
as thet, sir. but I'll stand by what ye 
says?’—Baltimore American. 
“Your poetry sells well, said the 
friend, “but it won’t live.” “That’s all 
right,” answered the poet. “If I've got 
to choose whether I or the poetry lives, 
I’m strong for me.”—Cleveland Leader. 
Browning: “What do you know 
about this poultry business, Greening? 
Is there any money in hens?” Green¬ 
ing: “You bet there is. I put all of 
$50 in mine last Winter.” — Chicago 
Daily News. 
“Dad, I was simply great in relay 
events,” boasted the boy from college. 
“Good enough, son. We’ll make use 
of them talents. Your ma will soon 
be ready to relay the carpets.”—Louis¬ 
ville Courier-Journal. 
“Benson,” cried the frightened mis¬ 
tress, as a crash of glass resounded 
through the house at 2 a. m., “is that 
burglars?” “No, ma’am; it’s master 
come home from the Aerial Maneuvers 
club, and lie’s trying to sail his airship 
through his bedroom window!”—Pick- 
Me-Up. 
Upgardson : “Isn’t a lawsuit over a 
patent right about the dullest thing you 
ever saw ?” Atom: “Not aways. I at¬ 
tended a trial of that kind once that 
was too funny for anything. A tall 
lawyer named Short was reading a 
6.000-word document he called a brief.” 
—Chicago Tribune. 
The old lady with the pale blue um¬ 
brella had been standing at the sta¬ 
tionery counter for ten minutes. “I 
want to be waited on,” she snapped 
impatiently. “Certainly, madam,” has¬ 
tened the tall floorwalker. “Do you 
wish a stationery clerk?” “Stationery 
clerk? Gracious! They all seem sta¬ 
tionery. They don’t want to move.”—* 
Baltimore Sun. 
“Dear me,” said the kind-hearted 
pedestrian, pausing and putting on his 
pince-nez, “have you fallen through 
that coal hole?” “Not at all,” replied 
the man, who was still endeavoring to 
extricate a leg from the hole, smiling 
winningly. “As you seem interested in 
the matter I will tell you what hap¬ 
pened. I. chanced to be in here, and 
they built the pavement round me."— 
Bystander : ~ ~ ~ 
Mary had a little lamb; its fleece 
was white as snow. . Would Mary ever 
sell the lamb? Why, what a question! 
No! She kept the lamb in luxury 
for many, many years, and every now 
and then she’d go and clip it with her 
shears, then sell the fleece and take 
the cash and put it in the bank, until 
she had quite a fortune of the very 
topmost rank. While Mary was a wise 
young girl, her father had a pull, and 
through his lobbying he kept the tariff 
up on wool.—Chicago Evening Post. 
SAVE HALF Your 
Paint Bills 
By using INGERSOLL PAINT - proved 
best by 66 years’ use. It will please you. 
Only Paint endorsed by the “Grange.” 
Made in all colors,—for all purposes. 
DELIVERED FREE. 
From the Mill Direct to You at Factory Prices. 
INGERSOLL PAINT BOOK —FREE 
Tells all about Paint and Painting for Durability. 
How to avoid trouble and expense caused by paints 
fading, chalking and peeling. Valuable information 
free to you. with Sample dolor Cards. Write me. DO 
IT NOW. I ean save you money. 
0. W. Ingersoll, 246 Plymouth St., Brooklyn, N. Y. 
UJANTEE 
V M EVERY ROLL OF 
OND 
/■* Tj/'l _ NEVER LEAK 
laxuU ROOFING 
T O *how pi~ ^ ive customers that 
we mean tL.atwe say when we 
out of business to-morrow, it would 
make no difference, because you are 
protected by the $2,000,000 Surety 
Company. 
The bond is absolutely legal and 
binding, and to avoid future loss we 
must make Congo so that it will out¬ 
live the guarantee period, and that is 
what we are doing. 
Send to us for a copy of the guar¬ 
antee and a sample of Congo Roofing. 
They are free. When you see the 
sample—when you see how tough 
and durable Congo is—you will 
understand why the National Surety 
Co. is willing to guarantee it so fully. 
M Lfl r n Successor to 
mru, \s\r. Buchanan Foster Co. 
532 WEST END TRUST BUILDING PHILADELPHIA, PA. 
SAN FRANCISCO 
say' 
talk about the durability of Congo, we 
went to the National Surety Co. and 
told them about it. 
We showed them that three-ply 
Congo would last at least ten years, 
and that if it failed to do so we could 
be trusted to make good. 
As a consequence, the National 
Surety Co. agreed to back every roll 
of Congo with a genuine Surety Bond. 
It gives you absolute protection 
against loss. 
The bond substitutes knowledge 
for guesswork. You do not depend 
upon our reputation alone. I f we went 
UNITED ROOFING AND 
CHICAGO 
To Save Labor 
USE THIS 
DAIN 
LOADER 
MAKE 
Better Hay 
WITH THIS 
DAIN 
Side Delivery 
RAKE 
No pulling or tugging to drag 
the hay from the back end of the 
load if this Loader is hitched to 
your wagon, because the elevating 
bars push the hay forward on the 
wagon so one man handles the 
hay easily. 
The Dain Loader takes hay 
from swath or windrow. Two sets 
of self adjusting rakes having a 
long sweep over stubble gather hay 
clean, but do not disturb trash. 
The reciprocating bars elevate 
hay without injury to the tender 
r 
0 
leaves because the self-expanding throat al lows hay to pass . 
freely onto wagon without wadding, tangling or jamming. 
An apron at top keeps hay from spilling or bl wing off 
side of load. Wheels set underneath so it can be taken 
through gates and operated close to fences, can be coupled 
on without crawling under wagon, uncoupled without getting 
off load. 
No ropes, cog gears, crossed chains, crooked crank 
shaft, or other traps to cause trouble, delay and expense 
Simple in every respect; light draft and durable. 
USE THE LAIN SIDE DELIVERY RAKE 
and have ai: cured hay. Such hay lias better color, is sweeter, 
rich in natural juices and nutriment. Worth more to feed or 
sell. 
It’s a Tedder and Rake in one, more and better than 
either. The three sets of teeth on a slowly revolving reel 
gently deliver two swatiis of hay upside down in a loose con¬ 
tinuous windrow so that every bit is exposed. The teeth may 
be set forward out of plumb so fluffy windrows are made 
in heaviest bay. Spring-supported reel frame prevents 
jar and strain over roughest grounds. 
These two tools are famous for saving labor and improv¬ 
ing hay. Like Dain Mowers, Sweep Rakes, Stackers and 
Presses, they are made of highest grade guaranteed material 
and will stand severe use even abuse that would ruin ordin¬ 
ary tools. 1 , • 
We have specialized on building bay making ma- 
chiniry for over a quarter of a century and have a reputation 
for producing unequaled labor-saving, rapid-hay-handling, 
reliable tools. 
Ask your Dealer to show you the Great Dain Line. 
Handy Reference Book 
“All About Hay” SENT FREE 
if you will tell us your Hay Tool needs. It gives valuable 
information for HaV Growers, write for it today. 
I . . . 
DAIN MFG. CO. 
802 Vine Street 
! 
OTTUMWA, 
IOWA 
Abenaque Water i Supply Systems 
I•' T r ■ and 
Pumping Plants 
Are described in detail in our new Water 
Supply Catalogue. We can furnish outfits 
for all purposes. Submit us your Proposi¬ 
tion and let us submit Price on a suitable 
system. Engineering advice gladly given 
free of charge. Write for Catalogue “O.” 
Abenaque Machine Works West virmont tation ’ 
Boston Salesroom, 77 Oliver Street 
Write Us a Postal 
—This Big Book Will Save 
You 4-0 to 50 Per Cent 
Answer this little ad and get our Big, New, 1909 Columbus Vehicle 
Book Free —Shows over 75 styles of vehicles to take your pick from. 
Save 40 to 50 per cent at our Factory Prices. Book shows you more 
variety to select from than any dealer can show Why pay the dealer’s 
big profit? Save the cash for yourself. Let the saving buy you any 
high-grade harness—also shown in this book. 
Buy Direct—On Full Month’s Trial —2 Years’ Guarantee 
Don’t fail to send us your name if you are now in the market for any vehicle or expect to be 
this year. Get our Book and Prices and prove what we say. Get factory prices and save money. 
The Columbus Carriage & Harness Co., Sta.C88 Columbus, O, 
Hand- 
Forged 
Wrought 
Iron 
Gear 
uaranteed 
2 Year* 
ANSWER 
This Ad and Get My Big FREE Book and Save $50 * 
Buy direct from the biggest spreader factory In 
the world—My price has made it—Savo dealer .Jobber 
and catalog house profit. No such price as 1 make 
on this high grade spreader has ever been made 
before In all manure spreader history. Hero's the 
secret and reason: I make you a price on one based ■ 
on a 25,000 guantltyand pay the freight right to 
your station. You only pay for actual material, 
labor and one small profit, based on this enormous 
quantity on a 
GALLOWAY 
Get my bran new proposition with proof—lowest 
price ever made on a tirst class spreader, with my 
agreement to pay you back your money after you 
tr.v It 12 months if it’s not a paying Investment. 
How’s that for a proposition! If I did not have 
best spreader I would not dare make such an offer. 
20,090 farmers have stamped tlielr O. K. on It. 
They all tried it SO days free just like I ask you 
to try it—30 DAYS FREE. Five Sizes— Including 
New Complete Steel Cear Spreader—70-bu. Size. 
Drop me a postal, end say—"Calloway, send me 
your now proposition and Big Sproader BOOK FREE 
with low prloes direct from your factory." 
Nobody can beat It. Freight 
WM. GALLOWAY CO. Pre P ald 
The James Modern 
Cow Stable 
More light, fresh air, cow comfort, convenience. 
Above all, better sanitary conditions. Write today 
for fine free book on James Sanitary Cow Stalls. 
Most practical book on stables and quarters ever 
published. Tells and shows how to make your dairy 
really up-to-date. 40 pages, printed In colors, beau¬ 
tifully Illustrated with many line barn and dairy 
views. For copy 
address 
KENT MFG- CO. 
130 Kane St., 
Fort Atkinson, Wisconsin 
A PERFECT COMBINATION 
THE MODERN SWING STANCHION, WATERING BASIN, 
REVERSIBLE MANGER PARTITION, STEEL GUARD RAILING, 
and extension bar preventing cattle from putting bend 
in at side. A whole herd of cows ean be stanchioned ilia 
jifl’y—sale, comfortable and clean. 
. Write to-day for full information and prices. 
GLOR BROS. & WILLIS MFG. CO., Attica. N. Y. 
PERFECTION SWING STANCHION 
WITH FRAME FITTED 
TO STABLE. 
Warranted the best, easiest 
to operato and most durable 
made. Stationary w li e n 
open. Thirty Days’ Trial. 
DOES NOT WEAR THE PLATE. 
BATES 4. SWIFT SPECIALTY MFG. CO., Box 5, Cuba, N. Y. 
roi iMca'c improved 
WARRINCR 
STANCHION 
H. A. Moyer, Syracuse, 
N. Y., says “they 
SAVE COST 
in feed in one winter.” 
Send address for speci¬ 
fications of inexpensive 
yet sanitary cow stable to 
WALLACE H. CRUMB, Box MS, Eorestvllle, Conn, 
Special Offer 
on 
3,4 & 5 H.P. Gasoline Engines 
Packingless, and 
above 4 H. P., 
self-starting. 14 
| years on the 
market. We build all sizes. 
C. H. A. Dissinger & Bro. Co. 
Wrightsville, Pa. 
