©40 
THE RURAL NEW-YORKER 
October 23, 1909. 
HUMOROUS 
Let the Tariff traders figger 
IIow to boost our burdens bigger, 
There’s a limit to what even they’ve pre¬ 
sumed ; 
There'll be pause for due reflection, 
In this riot of Protection, 
When the Ultimate Consumer is—consumed. 
—Puck. 
Teacher: “Felicia, name some bird 
that is extinct.” Felicia: “Our canary 
—the cat- got it last- night.”—Chicago 
Daily News. 
“It is annoying to wait for a train 
that’s late.”, “Yes; and it is even more 
annoying to wait for a train that was 
discontinued the week before.”—Louis¬ 
ville Courier-Jorunal. 
Blobbs—W hy do you liken Harduppe 
to the busy bee? He’s not particularly 
industrious, is he?” Slobbs—Oh, no, it 
isn’t that, but nearly every one he 
touches gets stung.—Philadelphia Rec¬ 
ord. 
Farmer Foddershucks : “Hoaw do 
them Summer boarders of yourn keep 
busy ?” Reuben Robbins: “They play 
golf.” F. F.: “What’n Sam Hill’s 
that ?” R. R.: “ ’S near’s I kin figger, 
it's solitaire shinny.”—Cleveland Leader. 
“Takes four men to handle me when 
I git started.” “I saw one man handle 
ye yesterday over on the next ranch.” 
“Well, they happened to be short-handed 
over there.”—Catholic Standard and 
Times. 
Woman (to boy whom she has sur¬ 
prised under apple tree) : “What are 
you doing in my orchard?” Boy: “If 
you please, ma’am, I just came to see 
if you would lend me a few apples.”— 
Punch. 
“I see you farmers are all buying au¬ 
tomobiles.” “We are,” admitted Farmer 
Whiffletree, “and you can believe it or 
not, but my hired man has developed 
enough energy to be pinched for speed¬ 
ing.”—Kansas City Journal. 
“A mother’s club!” exclaimed Mrs. 
Farmer Hayrick, putting the newspaper 
down. “The very idee o’ setch a thing! 
I never use nothin’ but a shingle. Nice 
‘sort o’ mothers they must be that has 
to use a club!”—Browning’s Magazine. 
“Father,” said little Rollo, “what is 
appendicitis?” “My son,” answered the 
cynical parent, “appendicitis is some¬ 
thing that enables a good doctor to 
open up a man’s anatomy and remove 
his entire bank account.”—Richmond 
Evening Star. 
“Is it true, doctor,” asked the Sum¬ 
mer girl, “that eating cucumbers will 
remove freckles?” “Of course,” replied 
Dr. Kidder, “in certain circumstances.” 
“Really! What circumstances?” “Well, 
provided the freckles are on the cucum¬ 
bers.”—Answers. 
“Your boy Josh says he is going to 
be a wizard of Wall street.” “Yes,” 
answered Farmer Corntossel. ‘ “He 
thinks so. But the chances are that the 
regular wizards will use him as the 
subject of one of their mysterious dis¬ 
appearance acts.”—Washington Star. 
SAVE HALF Your 
Bills 
By using INGERSOLL PAINT— proved 
best by 66 years’ use. It will please you. 
Only Paint endorsed by the “Grange.” 
Made in all colors,—for all purposes. 
DELIVERED FREE. 
From the Mill Direct to You at Factory Prices. 
INGERSOLL PAINT BOOK —FREE 
Telln all about Paint and Painting for Durability. 
How to avoid trouble and expenxe caused by paint* 
fading, chalking and peeling. Valuable information 
froo to you. with Sample Color Card*, Writ# m*. DO 
IT HOW. I can *av* you money. . 
0. W. Ingersoll, 246 Plymouth St, Brooklyn, N.Y. 
“BULLETIN No. 26” 
SENT FREE “HOWTO KEEP AWAY 
CHICKEN-LICE & MITES,” by only 
ONE APPLICATION A YEAR 
Successfully used upward of 30 years 
Carbollneum Wood Preserving Co. 
351 W. Broadway, New York, N. Y. 
i B eat AH 
; trn 
! 
E'B 
S S 
set 
531 
asm .j " jp grL 
Ay- 
rz- 
~S- 
< wr ■'V'T* 
& 
that some farmers 
still continue to haul 
litter out of the barn in fcriiSuR Litter Carrier 
a wheelbarrow—the dirtiest, 
hardest work on a farm—when the 
Star Litter Carrier 
Carries Litter Out Automatically? 
You can save three-quarters of the time cleaning out your barn and do 
it 10 times more conveniently. You can save three-quarters of an hour of 
your hired man’s time each day. How much will it be worth to you in a 
month? The Star Litter Carrier quickly pay# for itself. It lightens labor, 
lowers expense and increases profits. 
Send Us a Rough Sketch With Dimensions 
of your barn floor and we will draw same to a scale and submit specifications 
to you of your requirements and exact cost of installing an outfit. We will 
tell you whether you need a rigid or rod track outfit. All of this we do free 
of charge, and in addition we will send you our new and complete catalog— 
the most complete on Litter, Feed and Milk Can Carriers ever published— 
over 60 illustrations, 30 pages. 
HUNT, HELM, FERRIS & COMPANY 
Mfrs. of Bam Equipments for 25 Years 
No. SS Hunt Street - - Harvard, Ill. 
FREE-This Illustrated 
s \Magazine For Farmers 
Kaep 
^ YOU may learn all about the uses of cement 
^ and concrete on the farm— and hoiu to use 
Up-to-Dateon 
Farm Building News" 
You know that concrete is rapidly 
replacing lumber on the farm, because it 
is more economical, being perma 
nent and more safe, being fire¬ 
proof. This magazine will inlorm 
from time to time of what 
others are doing and what you 
can do. You will find it an edu 
them yourself, by reading this magazine 
—“The Farm Cament News”— # 
And the magazine won’t cost you a penny. ^ 
Just »end ua your name and full ad- 4 
dress on coupon, postal or in J 
letter and you will be 
put on our free list. ^ .*4 
r PORTLAND i 
V CEMENT ' 
cation, a correspondence course in 
k concrete construction. It's free be¬ 
cause we want you to know how to 
use Universal Portland Cement, 
the highest grade poitland cement 
made. Suitable for all classes of work, 
easiest to work with, always uniform and 
dependable. Get your name to us for * 
the magazine and be entertained and S ^ 
instructed by every issue you get. > <$> 
Address y V o* 
UNIVERSAL PORTLAND 
Dept. 2, 
CEMENT CO. 
Frick Bldg. 
Plttaburg, Pa. 
/v 
f o* \<$> 
e* 
■o* 
SEA GREEN 5c PURPLE 
SEA GREEN AND PURPLE SLATE 
is nature’s own product—not man made. Quarried from solid rock—split into 
convenient form for laying, and then in its natural state ready for the roof. 
SOLID ROCK CAN NOT WEAR OUT it can’t burn, 
rust, warp, crack, tear, or decay. That’s why Sea Green or Purple Slate Hoofs 
never wear outand never require painting and repairing like all other roofing. 
Sea Green & Purple Slate Hoofs are suitable for any [building, new or old. 
Give perfect protection. Reduce insurance rates because spark and fire-proof. 
Afford clean cistern water. Not affected by heat or cold. First cost—only a 
trifle more than short lived roofing. Settle your roof question for all time. 
Don't spend more money for poor roofing. Write to us for our free book 
“HOOFS”—it will save youmoney. Give name of your local roofer. Write today. 
AMERICAN SEA GREEN SLATE CO. 
Granville, N. Y. 
SLATE 
ROOFS 
NEVER 
WEAR 
OUT 
$50 TO $300 SAVED 
We are manufacturers, not merchants. Save dealers, 
jobbers and catalog house profit. I’ll save you from 
850 toS300 on my High Grade Standard Gasoline 
Engines from 2 to 22-H.-P.—Price direct to you 
lower than dealers or jobbers have to pay for 
similar engines in carload lots for spot cash. 
GALLOWAY 
Price and quality speak for themselves 
and you are to be the sole judge. 
Sell your poorest horse and buy a 
B-H.-P. only $119.50 
tion 
Direct 
From 
My Fac¬ 
tory on 30 
Days* Free 
Trial. Satislac- 
or money 
back. Write forspec- 
ial proposition. All 
you pay me is for raw 
material, labor ami 
k one small profit. Send lor 
my big BOOK FREE. 
Wm. Galloway, Pres. 
Win* Galloway Co. 
665 Galloway Statloa 
Waterloo, Iowa 
THi PORTER UTTER CARRIER 
Saves labor and time, Improves health conditions, enriches 
the field, promotes cleanliness, and given stock and dairy pro- 
ucts a clean 8«lable appearance. The carrier runs on a steel 
track, which is easily faaf- 
» ened to wall or ceiling, an<l 
runs very eanlly, an the 
wheels have roller bearings 
and are swivelled so as to 
round curves. With a set of 
gears, which are enclosed 
in the gear box, the tub U 
lowered for filling aim! llftecf 
for moving to tbe dump or 
the wagon, which increase 
the power. It is liquid tight 
and turns completely 
.over when the litter Is 
Stripped out. The tub Is 
[made of heavy steel, 
Jfirmly riveted, and lias 
* pivoted trucks to permit 
lateral swing, and frame 
Is of strong pipe and malleable irou. bend for a catalogue, 
which shows many exclusive features not mentioned here. We 
also have the best hay tools and other handy devices. Write us 
about your needs today, and let us Bend our free literature. 
J. E. POUTER CO., OTTAWA, ILL,. 
WITH GROOVED TIRES 
4 in. widej The Groove pro tecta 
the heads of spokes from wear, 
which makes wheel good and 
strong till tire is worn out. We 
make plain tire wheels in other 
widths. We make wheels to lit 
any thimble skein or straight 
steel axle. Get our free catalog 
of Steel Wheels and Low Down 
Handy Wagons. 
HAVANA METAL WHEEL CO., 
Box 17 .*. Havana, Ill. 
Wheels IISES 
of S led 
i 
Construction—that’s tho important 
thing in stool wheels. No spokes to rattle. 
No repair bills Empire Btoel wheels aro made 
to last a lifetime. Listen to one of our customers: 
“Gentlemen— I send you herewith order for 4 more 
! wheels. The wheels I got from you 10 years ago aro all 
right now. That's QUALITY." It’s the Empire Idea all 
I thro’. Ask about Empire Wagons. Shall wo sond catalog? 
EMPIRE MFQ. CO., Box 18A, QUINCY, ILLINOIS 
HARVEY BOLSTER SPRINGS 
Soon save their cost. Make every wagon a spring/ 
wagon* therefore fruit, vegetables, eggs, otc.,[ 
bring more money. Ask for special proposition. I 
Harvey Spring Co., 71617th St., Eacine, Win. I 
Free Trial To You 
Monarch 
Hydraulic 
Cider Press 
Great strength and ca¬ 
pacity; all sizes; also 
gasoline engines, 
steam engines, 
sawmills, thresh* 
ers. Catalog free. 
IfonarcbMachinery Co« 609 Cortlandt Bldg.. New York 
You Can Now Get a 40-Year Famous 
QUAKER CITY FEED MILL 
Direct From Factory—No Money Down—On Free 
Trial—Freight Prepaid—At BIG CUT in Prices 
S END your name, quick, for Cut Price and Free Feed Mill Book on Quaker City Feed Mill Grinders, 
so we can reserve one for you to just suit your needs, and save you all jobbers’, middlemen’s and 
dealers’ profits direct from the factory. Send no money—No deposit asked—We prepay the freight 
— You are the judge and jury on the free .« F n riTY FAMILY OP rnn 
lsrpric e e 0 ever y m °a U d a e nd ^ ** ' TB 1 ^, * S T 5fSAM^ACE AND BY TOE SAME 
Note particularly that this offer !s on Quaker City •nllll/T /* 
Mills— the grinders that have been the standard of qua]. pU* 
ity for over 40 years—the mills that are more widely ^ 
and more favorably known than all other makes put 
together—the mills that have never been sold before at 
the close manufacturer’s price until the past year. We 
have now cut out the Jobbers, Dealers and all Middle¬ 
men, and give you the benefit of saving their profits. 
You can prove, too, at our risk, that the Quaker City 
is all we claim, that it is the mill you want, before you 
pay us a penny. Send your name for our _ 
Bin Ffiftfl Mill Book Free Investigate—-and then convince yourself at our risk that the Quaker City Mill 
grinds fastest, does the best work with least power and least trouble on your 
part. Ear corn, shelled corn, all grains—separate or mixed, coarse, medium or the finest table meal; try the Quaker on all of these. 
Grinds soft and wet corn just as well as dry corn. Write for Free Book, cut prices, guaranty, free trial and prepaid freight offer. 
One of Our New 1910 Quaker City Mills will just fit your requirements and make you good money. 
A, G. Straub Co-, 3737 Filbert St-, Philadelphia, Pa. 
0 to ail 
11 Sizes—22 Styles 
From Hand to 20-Horse Power 
