1883 .] 
AMERICAN AGRICULTURIST. 
425 
Several years ago there was a similar nonsensical 
thing offered, a bit of sandstone impregnated with 
some perfume. The advertisement of this stone is the 
most absurd nonsense that we have read in many a day. 
A Mutual Relief Association. 
A correspondent in Wisconsin sends us the circular 
of a “Mutual Relief Association” in Iowa, and asks 
our opinion of the scheme. Sam Weller, we think it 
was, said that “ weal pie was worry good, ven you knew 
the vnman vot made it." This Relief scheme, for all 
that appears in their circular, may be a useful institu¬ 
tion, or it may he a miserable fraud. All depends upon 
the local reputation of those gentlemen whose names 
appear as President, etc. 
A Co-worker in a Good Cause. 
The editor of the “Honesdale (Pa.) Citizen” con¬ 
gratulates us upon the stand we have taken with re¬ 
gard to humbugs, and publishes in its circular to 
advertising agents the following: “ No ads. taken of 
an illegal or objectionable character, such as Lotter¬ 
ies, ‘Sands of Life,’ ‘Errors of Youth,’ ‘Manhood 
Restored,’ ‘Lydia Pinkham Medicines,’ and swindles 
generally.”—“Citizen,” we gladly greet you as a co- 
worker. It may cost you many advertisements, but you 
will have a clear conscience, and grow in the esteem of 
your neighbors. May they give you abundant support. 
Won’t I.ike tlie Circulars. 
A firm in Kokomo, Ind., lias received a batch of circu¬ 
lars from a certain so-called Brooklyn “Publisher,” 
which, as they say, “ we do not deem it right and proper 
to send out.”—They forward us the circulars, and we 
fully concur in their opinion. They can be character¬ 
ized by but one epithet, filthy in the extreme. Yet we can 
not fully expose them by giving the name and address 
of the senders. Wo can not well warn our readers against 
the things they offer for sale and keep our pages clean. 
Persons of “the age of discretion” must see at once, 
from the titles of books and photos, offered by this mis¬ 
erable Brooklyn concern, what is their animus and their 
vile intent, so thinly is it veiled. 
Notes Under False IVetences. 
We have described the various methods by which 
swindlers obtain notes from farmers, but these chaps by 
no means confine their attention to one class. A sub¬ 
scriber in New Hampshire writes us that a well dressed, 
business looking chap appeared among the stone cutters 
at Concord, in his State. He was taking orders for a 
Directory, which would gives the names and addresses 
of all the dealers in granite at the West, and much 
other important matter relating to the stone business. 
By his promises, a number were induced to sign orders 
for the Directory. The Directories never came, but the 
orders for them turned up in the hands of a third party, 
in the shape of notes for amounts ranging from $5.00 to 
$30.00. The injunction, “be careful what you sign,” is 
needed by others as well as farmers. 
Another Bogus Life Insurance. 
The last case is in Indianapolis, Ind. A company with 
the high-sounding nameof “ Washington Mutual Aid and 
Life Association,” had issued a policy to a Mr. Dick for 
$2,000. Recently Mr. Dick died, and his wife soon fol¬ 
lowed him, leaving three little children, whose only de¬ 
pendence was the amount of the life insurance. The 
guardian of the orphans applied to the Secretary of the 
Association, and was offered $34, all the “assets ” of the 
concern, in settlement of the claim I It was found that in 
this, as with many other such weak concerns, its whole 
income was absorbed in paying the salaries of a large 
corps of officials. When one insures his life, it is all 
important that he should do it in a company which will 
pay the amount at his death. There are so many per¬ 
fectly safe companies, that there is no excuse for making 
a mistake. 
Stamps and Names for a Knife. 
“N. M.,” Akron, Ohio, writes us that he saw in a pro¬ 
fessedly religious paper, published in Philadelphia, an 
advertisement of a New York chap, which, supposing 
it to be all right, he answered. The advertisement pro¬ 
posed, for five three-cent stamps, and four names, to 
send “an elegant tortoise-shell handle knife.” Mr. M. 
complied with the conditions, and writes: “ This a. m. 
I received a mere apology for a knife, that is absolutely 
worthless.” He adds that, with the knife, came “ a lot 
of circulars which I threw away, without examination, 
other than to notice that they advertised the ‘ Revela¬ 
tion of Wonderful Secrets,’ etc.” This is 
AN OLD TRICK TO GET NAMES. 
Names, real addresses, of persons in rural districts 
especially, are a part of the stock in trade of swindlers. 
They are bought and sold, and all sorts of devices are 
resorted to in order to procure them. Give no addresses 
of your friends and neighbors to strangers, no matter 
if a knife or any other inducement is offered. 
Coloring- Photographs. 
Parties in Boston and Fall River hold out great in¬ 
ducements to ladies, to make a small fortune by color¬ 
ing photographs, which they call by the absurd names 
of “Electographs,” “ Artographs,” etc. Some time 
ago we advised caution, on the ground that if the real 
object were to get photographs colored, hundreds right 
at home would be glad to do the work at a much less 
price than was offered. A lady writes us from Waka- 
rnsa, Kans., that she was living at the time not far from 
Boston, and, tempted by the offers, and having some 
knowledge of painting, she sent for two pictures, which 
came, and also sent money for painting materials, which 
did not come. She colored the two photographs with 
paints she had at hand, for which $1 was promised. 
The pictures were sent by mail; hearing nothing, she 
wrote, but had no reply. A while after she went to 
Boston, but searched for the concern in vain; “nobody 
knew anything about it.” The lady says: “I have 
never heard from my $3.50 for paints, or my two painted 
pictures.” Unusual ways of doing business are always 
to be regarded with suspicion. Instead of sending 
photographs to a long distance to be colored, and being 
at a great expense for circulars, etc., an advertisement 
of five lines in a Boston paper would bring them all the 
colorists needed. 
Miserable Trash. 
A great deal of the stuff advertised by certain parties 
can only be designated as miserable trash. No doubt 
they are often advertised in such a manner, as to induce 
the thoughtless to believe that they are much worse than 
they really are. Photographs are described in a way to 
suggest that they may be improper pictures. A small 
watch chain “ charm,” with a photograph and magnifier, 
proposes to show the “Beautiful in Nature Revealed,” 
etc. A "Rolled Gold Ring” is offered for thirteen three- 
cent stamps and twenty-four names.” These chaps are 
always after names. A knife is offered for sixteen cents 
and two names. One can learn how “Money can be 
made without hard work,” by investing ten cents. For 
this sum there will be sent “ something that will bring 
you in more money than you ever made before in your 
life,”—and much more of a similar character. We have 
before us a dozen or more of these trashy advertisements, 
giving half as many addresses, and one might suppose, 
ttiat a large number were engaged in the business. But 
the fact is, these are all, or nearly all, one concern with 
many aliases. Whether they call themselves “Agent’s 
Supply Companies,” “Manufacturing Companies,” with 
different prefixes,or by the name of an individual; whether 
they give their address as New York, Brooklyn, Williams- 
burgh or, what is the same, Brooklyn, E, D.—they are 
usually the same, and all to be avoided. 
Repel Ilie Advances of Stranger!!;. 
Nearly all the larger cities are infested by a gang of 
rascals, who make ita business of imposing upon visitors 
from the country. They lay in wait on the streets lead¬ 
ing from depots and steamboat landings, and can tell at 
glance if one is unused to the city. These chaps walk 
up to a stranger with outstretched hand, address him as 
Mr. Smith, and ask how he left the folks at Newtown, 
etc. This is so common in New York, that one of the 
comic papers recently published a caricature, suggest¬ 
ing the wearing by strangers of a large placard, saying, 
“ I am not Mr.-of-. The folks are all well. I do 
not want to go with you and see you get a prize you 
have drawn.” When a visitor in any city is accosted in 
this manner, he should pass on, and say nothing. A re¬ 
cently arrived Englishman who was saluted in this man¬ 
ner, foolishly went with a chap to a saloon to “take a 
drink.” He still more foolishly was induced by the con¬ 
federate loafers in the saloon to make a bet. He more 
foolishly yet, laid down his money. Before the bet could 
be decided, the money was grabbed and the loafers 
scattered. The police have not yet found the money or 
the one who took it. Perhaps the young Englishman 
does not deserve much sympathy, but his case illustrates 
tb^ fact, that the whole object of these newly found 
friends is to get their victim into some den, where there 
are confederates, and fleece him. 
Medical Institutes—Dispensaries, 
A number of letters of inquiry must be answered in 
general terms. No proper Medical College advertises 
for patients or to cure any one. The object of a college 
is to teach, and not to sell medicines. Any “college” 
that offers to do this is a fraud. The “Institutes” 
which advertise to treat patients and to sell medicines, 
so far as we have looked after them, have been found to 
consist of just one quack doctor, who makes use of 
this imposing name to further the sale of his alarming 
books and nostrums. Dispensaries, as the term is used 
in all large cities, are charitable institutions for the 
treatment of poor patients. The name is sometimes 
appropriated by those who propose to treat patients for 
pay, and who have their own nostrums for sale. To 
those who inquire about a certain widely advertised 
Dispensary in a Western city, we would say that our 
rule about 
ADVERTISING DOCTORS 
applies here. If the head of the “Dispensary” is, as 
he claims to be, a medical graduate, he has, by his sub¬ 
sequent course, cut himself off from all fellowship with 
regular physicians. We would not employ, nor would 
we advise any one else to entrust his case to a “ Doctor” 
who finds it necessary to advertise extravagantly, in 
order to get practice, or who makes various secret com¬ 
pounds which he offers to patients at a distance. No 
matter what claims these Dispensaries may make, our 
advice is, to let them all alone. 
“ The Medical Adviser.” 
The above is the title of a sheet of neat mechanical ap¬ 
pearance, about the size of the average country news¬ 
paper. It is without any date—year, month, or day, 
hence we infer that it is “ not foraday, but for all time.” 
If we lack the time, we have the place, which it is 
Omaha, Neb., and the name of the Proprietor is one 
Fishblatt, “ M. D.” The name of the Editor is not an¬ 
nounced, but from the frequent occurrence of his name 
in the paper it is, no doubt, the same Fishblatt, who 
runs a “ Medical Dispensary.” This sheet furnishes 
proof of the truth of the axiom that: “a person can do 
but one thing at a time and do it well.” If Fishblatt 
runs a Dispensary, and treats all the various diseases as 
set forth in this sheet, we can hardly expect him to be a 
first-class editor. We read, “we are INVARIABLY 
(Caps, Mr. Printer, if you please) governed by the follow¬ 
ing rules” : ‘1st. We furnish all medicines. 2. We only 
treat such cases of sickness as we have cured.” If Fish¬ 
blatt only treats the cases he has cured, why all this 
flourish ? Of all the cattle in Nebraska, was there ever so 
fine a specimen of the Irish Bull! One article points out 
that “the physician should clearly understand three dis¬ 
tinct points.” 
AN EDITOR SHOULD UNDERSTAND, 
Well—several things, one of which is the use of the Eng¬ 
lish language. We are inclined to think, that Fishblatt 
is not much better as a doctor than he is as an editor. 
He proposes to treat patients by mail, and says: “give 
your age, hight, weight, color of eyes and hair, sex,” 
etc. Fishblatt claims to “ have been the first to find 
three specific medicines, essentially different in their 
properties, each one adapted to only one part of the 
system,” etc. We are told that “ By the concurrent 
actions” of these all working on the system at the same 
time “ they will cure disease that cannot be cured by any 
other medicine.” It must, be a tough disease that, will 
stand this triangular attack—but how about the patient ? 
There is a great deal of amusing reading in this “Ad¬ 
vance,” but some of the funniest is not quotable. 
MAHOMET GOES TO THE MOUNTAIN. 
For fear that the “ cases of sickness we have cured” 
will not come to be treated, Fishblatt goes to the cases, 
and like a circus poster, his paper announces, that he 
will exhibit at nearly twenty places on certain dates, and 
adds: “for further particulars” see—not “small bills” 
—but “ your county papers.” When a man claiming to 
be an “M. D.” claims to have “ discovered the greatest 
