978 
IV RURAL NEW-YORKER 
Pastoral Parson and His Country Folks 
By Rev. George B. Gilbert 
A Pull Team. —ITere it is the last 
day of grace before the Parson must send 
in his letter to The Rural New-Yorker 
family. While the Parson is writing on 
a Monday morning the boys are pulling 
down the oats. The crop does not amount 
to much this year, as they were sown on 
upland and just about dried up. George 
goes ahead with the mowing machine and 
Clossie follows right behind him with the 
horse rake, and Shelley comes along with 
a fork and turns the windrow aside, so 
that the machine and horse do not go 
over it next time and shell off the 
oats. They do this way almost univer¬ 
sally in some places in Vermont, and it 
seems to work out well. They cock up 
the oats and leave them in the field till 
they thrash them, just drying out the 
cocks the day before. 
Real Company. —The Parson has had 
a good deal of real company this Sum¬ 
mer, and as a consequence done very little 
haying himself. Rooking out of the win¬ 
dow one day he saw two fellows coming 
down the road—really tramps. They had 
tramped all the way from New York, 
sleeping in the woods nights. The Par¬ 
son had known them years ago ns boys 
with poor heritage and no bringing up, 
and every kind of a handicap. So we 
fixed them up a camp, with a tent and 
cots, an old stove and table, and got them 
clothes, and they settled down for awhile. 
We had raised the old garage building 
about three feet, and there was a lot of 
1 dirt to be drawn for grading and filling 
in. They were good at hoeing, too. We 
filled them up with food and got them 
cleaned up and shaved up, and the Par¬ 
son cut their hair. Now they have both 
gone—one Avorking out on a farm and 
the other to some of his relations. Tb? 
tent and everything are still up there, 
and with so many out of work the Par¬ 
son expects to have more company ’most 
any time. 
A Great Sunday. —It may be a chest¬ 
nut by this lime, but the Parson just 
can’t help telling what a great day we 
had down to the old country church yes¬ 
terday. It was sort of a special day 
with us, as we heard there was company 
coming to see how we did things from a 
city some distance off. When this big 
auto load of people came in they had to 
look sharp for a seat, which was just as 
the Parson hoped it would be. They 
seemed to be quite impressed, for while 
most of them dropped paper money on the 
plate, one of them plumped on a ten- 
dollar note. Fortunately it was so 
crumpled up that the man passing the 
plate did not see what it was. The Par¬ 
son is certain that if he had he would 
have dropped the plate and all its con¬ 
tents, and not at all uncertain that he 
would not have dropped dead himself. 
The Trimming. —They exclaimed much 
over the trimming, and little dreamed 
that it did not take the Parson and two 
small boys 10 minutes to do it all. We 
have stovepipe wire strung across each 
window about IS inches above the sill. 
This does not show at all, and stays there 
all the time. We just take green boughs 
and branches and stand them right up 
back of this wire, and it certainly makes 
a pretty and dainty effect. We had some 
daisies on the altar, backed with ferns. 
Such a dinner, too, as we had after the 
service, and plenty of huckleberries and 
milk. When you go home from such a 
day you feel as though you could take up 
life’s burdens afresh. Most churches 
have a church picnic once a year, and 
what a good time everyone has, and how 
much real good such a time does; but 
question has regularly come up—a new 
car or something about the house. In 
every case so far the house has won out. 
At one time there was the matter of an 
addition to Mrs. Parson’s room, then 
there was the electric light, then the one- 
pipe furnace, then the electric washing 
machine and the electric cleaner and now 
comes the electric dishwasher. We ran 
across a chance to buy one, only used for 
demonstration, at just half the regular 
price, and after a week’s trial, Mrs. 
Parson could not part with it. Better a 
dishwasher three times a day than a new 
car once a week. So the latter is post¬ 
poned again. George has given Dare¬ 
devil a new coat of paint, the body black 
and the wheels a beautiful brilliant red. 
History surely repeats itself, for they 
were red once before—eight years ago. 
At two different times since then have 
they been yellow, and in fact, the poor 
old boat could lay claim to most e\ r erv 
color of the rainbow except envy green— 
for no one has ever envied her owner or 
ever will. 
Will It Do It?-—T hat is what every¬ 
one asks of the dishwasher. Much de¬ 
pends on how the dishes are put in place 
so the 'flying dashing water can touch all 
parts of them. But it is wonderful what 
good work it will do, and you can use 
seething hot water, as you 
by hand. Washing powdei 
to use than soap. After 
open the top at once and let the dishes 
dry off. Mrs. Parson generally runs 
over them with a towel as Sit puts them 
could not do 
is. far better 
the rinsing 
feather. Plowing in the Fall with Winter 
freezing of the roots, harrowing well 
before corn planting, using the two-horse 
cultivator before the corn was up and con¬ 
tinually thereafter till the thick shade of 
the corn got in the most deadly work of 
all, told the whole story. No crop had 
been missed, little or no extra work had 
been done that ought not to have been 
done anyway, the hand hoe had not been 
near the piece, and yet the stuff was dead. 
It hardly seemed possible. 
■Coming Home. — During war time 
many young fellows went away to work 
in city factories, getting big pay, who are 
now drifting back to the old home farm. 
How many have come back with nothing, 
and how many have come back with some¬ 
thing, something besides lost morals and 
bad habits! The Parson noticed a great 
change in the way a fine big meadow Avas 
being farmed, just on the edge of the 
town. It was turned into a big garden, 
and was blossoming like the rose, 
man who lived in the corner of this 
field had never had hardly enough laud 
to put his barn on. And now his boy 
had come home with fh r e hundred dollars 
right in his pocket, and he had bought 
this meadow, making half payment, with 
a fine brook running through its center 
and an orchard over on the farther side. 
There, the boy and his father were work¬ 
ing together, and the cow no longer was 
staked out in tin* front dooryard but was 
grazing among cowslips. It was a pretty 
sight to see and a nicer thing to think 
upon and the Parson pondered it long 
as he coasted along in his brother’s flivver 
over the road where he had trudgen to 
school as a boy. 
A New Ratio. —Next to the dead 
witch grass, perhaps the greatest surprise 
the Parson had was when his wandering 
gaze fell on a neighboring hillside about 
half a mile away. Here had always lived 
a most thrifty and prosperous farmer. 
The 
very 
July 30, 1021 
“What is the first you would mention?” 
asked the Parson. “Well, the first one— 
♦ he very first one—would be to grind up 
the kitchen knives and keep them sharp.” 
At that very moment she was trying to 
cut lamb with a knife with a veritable 
hoe-edge upon it. The Parson lias mused 
slightly upon the matter. Ilow long 
would a farmer mow with a dull scythe, 
or chop with a nicked nx, or let his horse 
tug and sweat with the dull sections in 
the grass? He always has a whetstone 
at the end of the row when he cuts corn. 
Yet his wife saws merrily away on a 
piece of bacon and haggles her patience 
and the bread together. 
Other Things.— Then there is the 
matter of flies. How about the hole in 
the screen door and those screens for the 
chamber upstairs? And above all, the 
pump! Does it run down all the time, 
when a washer for 15 cents would stop 
it? It took the Parson just about fh r e 
minutes to fix a pump the other day so 
the children of a family would not have 
to go away down the road and lug water 
from a well. Did you get that pulley line 
for the window when you Avere in town, 
so that the clothes can be hung out in 
Winter without going outdoors at all? 
Get a 4-inch pulley wheel made for the 
purpose. A spring for the pantry door, 
so that it will be shut and keep the cat 
out will not cost over a dime. Why not 
get one? 
. xA rt# 
hn 
■l" • . *. -■> V. ' , 
; •/> * 
i 
t i'i. 'Kt, 
Discussing the Potato Crop 
away 
they 
But it is really no work at all, as 
then are so nearly dry—here and 
there a drop on them, 
many dishes at night 
able just to pack the 
washer till 
the way of 
still better 
does 
top 
morning, 
drawing 
out. of 
not take up niucb room, 
is used in place of the 
When not a great 
it is so nice to be 
dishes away in the 
They are out of 
flics, and what is 
sight. The thing 
as the 
regular 
Avhy have only one a year? If it makes 
everyone feel better and happier and old 
neighborhood scores are forgotten, why 
not have it oftener? And what day so 
good for it as Sunday? And what place 
so nice for it as around the old church 
with its spire pointing upward? 
Those Woodchucks. —The Parson lias 
had a good many letters about the boys 
trapping woodchucks. They seem to think 
the practice very cruel, and the Pa’ son 
admits there is something to it. Ii the 
traps are watched properly, however, it 
is certainly reduced to a minimum. Fvi- 
dently the hoys’ traps do not hurt very 
much, as the only grown ’chuck they got 
hold of calmly 'pulled out his foot and 
disappeared down the hole. The Parson 
Avent to visit another trap with George. 
Sure enough, there was something in it. 
Such excitement! The Parson pulled 
gently on the chain until the nose of the 
beast appeared. But it was a black and 
white nose! “It is no woodchuck,” 
quoth the Parson, “hut a skunk. Yoir 
hold the chain, George, and I will reach 
down and release his paw, as we want 
no skunks this time of year.” But 
George was curious. He must see how 
he looked. So lie pulled the chain a little 
further. Well, he found out! In fact, 
he found a good deal more than he ex¬ 
pected. He admitted afterwards that it 
was a wonderful aim that skunk had. 
Neither he nor the Parson seemed in any 
special hurry to go down to dinner. 
There really hasn’t been so much enthu¬ 
siasm over trapping since. 
The Dishwasher. —As the Parson 
writes a new sound comes floating 
through the house—that of the electric 
dishwasher. For more than a year the 
kitchen table, with a very small table 
nearby on which to put the dishes 
when you drv them. There are round 
types which fit much better in some kit¬ 
chens. Mrs. Parson had declared Ave 
could never have one, as the kitchen 
was too small, hut now she really has 
more room than she had before. 
An Auto Trip. —The Parson has been 
up to his old home in Vermont, having 
night a ride up in an auto-—210 miles 
a wonderful ride, with 
River and 
ill the way 
m one day. It is 
the Connecticut 
growing smaller 
the crops 
Such a 
difference as 200 miles makes. Corn that 
is considered “very early flint” here does 
not get ripe at all up there, hut makes 
tine silage. The hay crop is even poorer 
up there than in Connecticut. The Par¬ 
son thinks lie never saw it so light. All 
other crops looked fine, the drought being 
too early to affect them. Seed potatoes 
take up most of the attention in this sec¬ 
tion and while the Parson is looking- 
after one set of rogues, Jiis brother is 
rogueing out another. For four years 
now, the old farm has produced over n 
thousand bushels of potatoes a year and 
there seems to be about as much other 
stuff on it too. 
Quack Grass. — Hoav the Parson used 
to worry about the witch grass getting 
into the various lots on the farm. We 
used to try to dig it up with forks and 
stop its progress. It seemed as though 
the whole country round about was go¬ 
ing to be utterly ruined by it. The south 
lot got completely infested. “Come out 
and look at the south lot covered Avitli 
silage corn,” said the Parson’s brother. 
So we sallied forth. “It must he terrible 
fighting the witch grass,” said the Parson. 
“Not at all. for as a matter of fact, there 
is hardly any left in the lot.” You could 
have knocked the Parson, over Avith a 
lie always kept about eight head of cows 
and young stock and two or three pigs 
and 40 or 50 hens. This proportion may 
have varied some, hut not to any great 
extent. Now comes along the youngest 
son, who has been to Cornell. What 
happens? Logs are bought from a neigh¬ 
bor and carted away to the sawmill dur¬ 
ing the Winter, a truck at $25 a day 
brings tons and tons of gravel from the 
river bottoms, five miles away; a hand 
concrete mixer is purchased, Avith over a 
hundred hags of cement, and a henhouse 
arises up on that old side hill that is 00 
feet long and 25 feet Avide. Big ship¬ 
ments of day-old chicks arrive from Mich¬ 
igan, and the ratio changes from its 40 
hens to over 700. It will he interesting 
to watch it all, and the Parson predicts 
success. They are wonderfully painstak¬ 
ing. thorough-going people, and the boy 
who last year cleared $100 net on 40 
hens is not really going into the poultry 
business, but growing into it. 
Which the More Human? —“Whose 
dog is this?” said the Parson, as a sort 
of cowed, much whipped-looking speci¬ 
men appeared at the door of the house 
where he was stopping. “Oh, that is the 
dog that draws the little boy in the cart 
up and down the road,” they said. “His 
little master is only seven years old, and 
has to work terribly hard. 11 is great 
father heats him and makes him work, 
hut his doggie is always with him. And 
do you know.” they continued, “his father 
went up to bed one morning with a stick 
to heat him and make him get up, and 
fhe dog fought the father terribly and 
drove him back downstairs.” Whether 
the boy’s sleep was disturbed the Parson 
did not hear. Quite likely it was, but 
it made the Parson muse much as to 
whether, after all, man was not the only 
animal that makes his children Avork to 
support themselves, if not their parents, 
•too. Is a man’s responsibility in this 
world Avholly ended if he but sit on the 
porch in an easy chair and yells at the 
children all day long?” 
The Little Helps. —“If I had a 
chance I’d like to put in some paper the 
little things a man could do to help tre¬ 
mendously about the house,” said a 
woman to the Parson the n*4mr day. 
Some of the World’s “Queer” People 
There are some peculiar people in the 
world. For instance, when the writer 
was younger he moved into a strange 
neighborhood. One day a neighbor came 
and wanted to borroAv our roller, which 
was gladly loaned. Three days later ho 
returned it, and asked how much the 
charges were, and was told that there Avas 
no charge, but he insisted upon paying, 
and so we said 10 cents a day. He had a 
25-eont piece in his hand in pocket which 
he drew out, looked at, and then said that 
he did not quite have the change, but 
would get it. Being told that the quarter 
would suffice, he said, “No, that is not 
my way of doing business. If you think 
you should have 10 cents a day, that’s 
what you’ll got,” and started for home, 
returning as soon as possible Avith the 30 
cents, which lie handed me without a 
word and walked away. The next year, 
although his own roller had been repaired 
and put in order, lie came again for my 
roller. Now, here is the joke: lie came 
for it before it was scarcely light in the 
morning, changed teams and drivers every 
two hours, kept the teams on a trot, or 
as near it as possible, every minute till 
after 11 o’clock at night (it Avas bright 
moonlight), returned the roller within 24 
hours from the time he got. it, which was 
before I was up. When I came from the 
house he was waiting with the 10 cents 
in his hand, asked me if that Avas right, 
and upon being told that it Avas, started 
for home. 
Another neighbor was contrary. Go 
to him in the morning and ask him to 
help you saw wood today and he will 
hustle his chores out of the way and go 
right along with you, but if you go to¬ 
night and ask him to come oA T er tomorrow 
and help cut down a tree he av i 11 promise, 
but next morning come and tell you lie 
can’t help you, although he will stay and 
visit long enough to have cut the* tree. 
It’s the same in thrashing or silo filling, 
or anything for which lie is Avanted ; nev¬ 
er go for him till he is wanted. If he 
thinks on it over night he is hound to do 
the opposite of what you want. Go and 
bargain for a cow today, and unless you 
pay him today the deal Avill be all off'to¬ 
morrow. If his wife wants him to stay 
up at night he will pike right for bed as 
soon as he lias time to think it over, but 
if she really wants him to go to bed she 
asks him to sit up, and whatever she 
Avants she asks for the opposite. lie Avent 
to the store and got some groceries, 
learned for the first time that soap was 
up 1 cent a cake and would not get any 
soap. His wife, upon being told that soap 
was up, although she already knew it, 
agreed with him that they should go with- 
out soap, and the next day he hitched up 
the horse and drove the four miles to 
town to get some soap. Ilad she said 
they must have the soap he would never 
have got it. If he is elected trustee he 
resigns the next day, and if not elected he 
finds a lot of unreasonable fault with the 
one who is elected. You can visit Avith 
him all day without a disagreement, hut 
next day he will come and contradict 
everything you said. If you want him to 
vote for some special man, tell him that 
man is no good, unless it is just before he 
is ready to vote, when he has not had time 
to think it over. If you want him to stay 
home, tell him to be sure to go. He will 
not wear two shoes that are mates unless 
his wife tell him not to. M. F. 
“Yes,” said the old man to his visitor, 
“I am proud of my girls, and would like 
t<> see them comfortably married, and as 
T have made a little money they will not 
go penniless to their husbands. There is 
Mary, 25 years old, and a really good 
girl. I shall give her $1,000 Avhen she 
marries. Then comes Bet. avIiu Avon’t see 
35 again. I shall give her $3,000, and 
the man who takes Eliza, who is 40, will 
have $5,000 with her.” The young man, 
reflected for a moment and then inquired : 
“You haven’t one about 50. hnA r e you?’ 
—Fror.vbndv’s Magazine. 
