Jlitttps* 
SCHOOLING A HUSBAND. 
Mrs. Center was jealous. She was one of those 
discontented women who are never satisfied unless 
something goes wrong. When the sky is bright and 
pleasant, they are annoyed because there is nothing 
to grumble at. The trouble is not with the outward 
world, but with the heart, the mind; and every one 
who wishes to grumble will find a subject. 
Mrs. Center was jealous. Her husband was a very 
good sort of person, though he probably had his 
peculiarities. At any rate, he had a cousin, whose 
name was Sophia Smithers, and who was very pretty, 
very intelligent, and very amiable and kind-hearted. 
I dare say he occasionally made her a social call, to 
which his wife solemnly and seriously objected, for the 
reason that Sophia was pretty, intelligent, amiable and 
kind-hearted. These were the sum total of her sins. 
Center and his wife boarded in a private establish¬ 
ment at the South end of Boston. At the same house 
also boarded Center’s particular, intimate, and con¬ 
fidential friend Wallis, with his wife. Their rooms 
might almost bo said to be common ground, for the 
two men and the two women were constantly together. 
Wallis could not help observing that Mrs. Center 
watched her husband very closely, and Center at last 
confessed that there had been some difficulty. So 
they talked the matter over together, and.came to the 
conclusion that it was very stupid for any one to be 
jealous, most of all for Mrs. Center to be jealous. 
What they did I don’t know, but one evening Center 
entered the room and found Mrs. Wallis there. 
“ My dear, I am obliged to go out a few moments 
to call upon a friend,” said Center. 
“ To call upon a friend !” sneered Mrs. Center. 
“Yes, my dear, I shall be back presently,” and 
Mr. Center left the room. 
“ The old story,” said she, when he had'gone. 
“ If it was my husband I would follow him,” said 
Mrs. Wallis. 
“ I will!” and she immediately put on her bonnet 
and shawl. “ Sophia Smithers lives very near,, and I 
am sure he is going there.” 
Center had gone up stairs to put on his hat and 
overcoat, and in a moment she saw him on the stairs. 
She could not mistake him, for there was no other 
gentleman in the house who wore such a peculiar 
shaped Kossuth as he wore. 
He passed out, and Mrs. Center passed out after 
him. She followed the queer shaped Kossuth of her 
husband, and it led her to C-street, where she 
had suspected it would lead her. And further, it led 
her to the house of Smithers, the father of Sophia, 
where she suspected also it would lead her. 
Mrs. Ceuter was very unhappy. Her husband had 
ceased to love her; he loved another; he loved Sophia 
Smithers. She could have torn the pretty, intelligent, 
amiable and kind-hearted cousin of her husband in 
pieces at that moment; but she had the fortitude to 
curb her belligerent tendencies, and ring the door-bell. 
She was shown into the sitting-room, where the 
beautiful girl of many virtues was engaged in sewing. 
“ Is my husband here ?” she demanded. 
“ Mr. Center? Bless you, no ! He hasn’t been 
here for a month.” 
Gracious ! What a whopper ! Was it true that 
she whose multitudinous qualities bad been so often 
rehearsed to her could tell a lie ? Hadn’t she seen 
the peculiar Kossuth of her husband enter that door ? j 
Hadn’t she followed that unmistakable hat to the 
house ? 
She was amazed at the coolness of her husbaud’s 
fair cousin. Before, she had believed it was only a 
flirtation. Now, she was sure it was something in¬ 
finitely worse, and she thought about a divorce, or at 
least a separation. 
She was astounded, and asked no more questions. 
Did the guilty pair hope to deceive her— her, the 
argus-eyed wife ? She had some shrewdness, and she 
had the cunning to conceal her purpose by refraining 
from any appearance of distrust. After a few words 
upon commonplace topics she took her leave. 
When she reached the sidewalk, there she planted 
herself, determined to wait till Center came out. For 
more than an hour she stood there, nursing the yellow 
demons of jealousy. He came not. While she, the 
true, faithful and legal wife of Center, was waiting on 
the cold pavement, shivering in the cold blast of 
autumn, he was folded in the arms of the black¬ 
hearted Sophia, before a comfortable coal fire. 
She was catching her death a-cold. What did he 
care — the brute! He was bestowing his affections 
upon her who had no legal right to them. 
The wind blew, and it began to rain. She could 
stand it no longer. She should die before she got the 
divorce, and that was just what the inhuman Center 
would wish her to do. She must preserve herprecious 
life for the present, and she reluctantly concluded to 
go home. Center had not come out, and it required a 
struggle for her to forego the exposure of the nefarious 
scheme. 
She rushed into the house, into her room. Mrs. 
Wallis was there still. Throwing herself upon the 
sofa, she wept like a great baby. Her Mend tried to 
comfort her, but was firmly resolved not to be com¬ 
forted. In vain Mrs. Wallis tried to assure her of the 
fidelity of her husband. She would not listen to the 
words. But while she was thus weeping, Mr. Center 
entered the room, looking just as though nothing had 
happened. 
“ You wretch !’ sobbed the lady. 
“What is the matter, my dear?” coolly inquired 
the gentleman, for he had not passed through the 
battle and storm of matrimonial warfare without being 
able to “stand fire.” 
“You wretch!” repeated the lady, with compound 
unction. 
“ What has happened ¥” 
“You insult me, abuse me, and then ask me what 
the matter is!” cried the lady. “Haven’t I been 
waiting in C-. street for two hours, for you to come 
out of Smither’s house ?” 
“ Have you?” 
“I have, you wretch !” 
“ And I did not come out ?” 
“ No ! You know you didn't!” 
“There was an excellent reason for that, my dear. 
I wasn’t there,” said Center, calmly. 
“ You wasn’t there, you wretch ! How dare you 
tell me such an abominable lie ! But I have found 
you out. You go there every day, yes, twice, three 
times a day ! I know your amiable cousin, now! 
She can lie, as well as you.” 
“ Sophia tell a lie ! 0 no, my dear!” 
“ But she did. She said you were not there.” 
“ That was very true ; I was not.” 
“How dare you tell me such a lie ! You have been 
with Sophia all the evening. She is a nasty baggage !” 
“Nay, Mrs. Center; you are mistaken,” interposed 
Mrs. Wallis. “ Mr. Center has been with me in this 
room all the evening.” 
“ What? Didn't I see him go out and follow him 
to C - street ?” 
“ Noj-my dear, I haven't, been out this evening. 1 
changed my mind.” 
Just then Wallis entered the room with that pe¬ 
culiar Kossuth on his bead, and the mystery was ex¬ 
plained. Mrs. Center was not a little confused, and 
very much ashamed of herself. 
Wallis had been in Smithers’ library smoking a 
cigar, and had not seen Sophia. Her statement that 
she had not seen Center for a month was strictly true, 
mud Mrs. Center was obliged to acknowledge that she 
had been jealous without a cause, though she was not 
“ let into” the plot of Wallis. 
But Center should have known better than to tell 
his wife what a pretty, intelligent, amiable and kind- 
hearted girl Sophia was. No husband should speak 
well of any lady but his wife. 
ANECDOTE OF WASHINGTON. 
This anecdote of General Washington appeared in 
au English magazine in 1823: 
During his administration as President of tlibUnited 
States, a gentleman, a friend of the President through¬ 
out the whole course of the .Revolutionary war, ap¬ 
plied for a lucrative and responsible office. The 
gentleman was at all times welcome to Washington’s 
table. He had been to a certain degree necessary to 
the domestic repose of a man who had for seven 
years fought the battles of his country, and who had 
now undertaken the task of wielding her political 
energies. At all times and in all places Washington 
regarded his Revolutionary associate with an eye of 
evident partiality and confidence. 
He was a jovial, pleasant, and unobtrusive com¬ 
panion. In applying for the office it was in the full 
confidence of success, and his friends already cheered 
him in the prospect of his arrival at competency and 
ease. 
The opponent of this gentleman was known to be 
decidedly hostile to the politics of Washington. He 
had even made himself conspicuous among the ranks 
of the opposition. He had, however, the temerity to 
stand as a candidate for the office to which the friend 
and favorite of Washington aspired. He had nothing 
to urge in favor of his pretensions but strong integrity, 
promptitude and fidelity in business, and every quality 
which, if called into exercise, would render service to 
the State. 
Every one considered the appointment of this man 
hopeless. No flattering testimonial of merit had he 
to present to the eye of Washington. He was known 
to be his political enemy. He was opposed by a 
favorite of the General; and yet with such fearful 
odds he dared to stand as a candidate. What was 
the result? The enemy of Washington was ap¬ 
pointed to the office, and his table companion left des¬ 
titute and rejected. 
A mutual friend, who interested himself in the 
affair, ventured to remonstrate with the President for 
the injustice of his appointment. “ My friend,” said 
he, “ I receive with a cordial welcome. He is wel¬ 
come to my house and welcome to my heart. But, 
with all his good qualities, he is not a man of busi¬ 
ness, His opponent is, with all his political hostility 
to me, a man of business. My private feelings have 
nothing to do in this case. I am not George Wash¬ 
ington, but President of the United States. As 
George Washington J would do this man any kind¬ 
ness in my power ; but- as the President of the United 
States I can do nothing.” 
