SPORTS 
•F.tlRj ' ISLAND TEES 
"FASTEST PUSSY CHASER IN THE PACIFIC" 
Larry (Wonderboy) Huber has again won the laurels in the Annual 
Howland-Baker Pussy-Stomping Frolic. Huber outdistanced three 
pussy in as many hours delivering the coup with his revolutionary 
Two-Foot Stomp (from two feet away or with two feet depending on 
his mood of the moment) Huber states that there is no essential 
difference in black, yellow, and white pussy but admits to a slight 
bias in favor of black pussy. 
C.D. Hackman, a traditionalist, won honors in the Pussy Place Kick 
delivering a classical end over end flight which was admired by all 
observers (except Huber who was stomping at the time) . When asked 
how he managed to deliver the blow with such esthetic success, 
he replied " I stumbled". 
" IS THIS A RECORD" 
• ....... . - 
We have heard by flying frigate that a rival team has amassed 
a total of 7000 Sooty Terns in two weeks. Our editorial staff feels 
that this 5 r, « comer labl© effort but really should be considered 
an amateur effort. A banding team composed of Hackman, Clapp, and 
Huber has beaten this record handily. In 4 nights they banded 
3900 sooty tern between them. The ATF banding crew offers to 
outband on a 2-1 ratio any other team staffed by Poop-troops from 
2 man to 5 man teams. We accept any challenge on either a speed 
or endurance basis. 
