April 2O, J 91 7 
LAND & WATER 
The Lost Platoon 
By Gentiirion 
II 
IT was a warm August niglit, but tliere was a fire in the 
guard-room. It's a way we have. The hands of the 
clock pointed to twenty-five minutes to ten. Six 
men in kliaki uniform lay on as many beds, most of 
them on their backs with their hands clasped under their 
iieads, and gazing contemplatively at the white-washed walls. 
The corporal of the guard was sitting up reading an eve- 
ning paper by the light of his own tallow "dip," stuck in an 
empty bottle; from which depended a stalactite of grease, 
lie read most of the time in silence, but occasionally he 
whispered a long word, dwelling on eadi syllable as though 
to give it due weight, and glancing inquisitively at the ser- 
geant. The sergeant was sitting stolidly at a deal tabic 
making entries in a buff document. He tickled the bottom 
of the ink-bottle with his pen as though seeking inspiration 
tlicrein. Then he inclined his liead to one side, protruded 
liis tongue athletically, squared his elbows and proceeded to 
write. 
'■ U-1-t-i-m-a-t-um ! I sav, sargent, what is a hul- 
- timatum"? " " Wait till I've finished this blooming guard 
report," said the sergeant, adding to liimself " Defaulters 
- one." 
There was silence for a time, broken only Iw the scratching 
of the sergeant's pen, and the purring of the kettle on the 
range. 
'- Bank-rate — ten per cent," read the corporal confusedly. 
" What the 'ell does that mean ? What did you say a hul- 
timatum was, sargent ? " 
".I didn't say it was anything," retorted the sergeant, 
cautiously. " Here, lemme see the paper." He stuched it 
for a moment. " It means " he said resolutely, " get out or 
get under." " Well, why can't they say so ? " said the cor- 
poral grievously. " I passed the "fifth standard, but these 
jaw- breaking words give me the hump." 
He glanced at the sergeant, and seeing he was resting from 
his literary labours he felt encouraged to proceed. ," When 
the orderly officer came round to-day he sez to Private 
Whipple what was on sentry, he sez, ' Give up your orders ? ' 
and Private Whipple repeats his orders like as if he was saying 
the Lord's Prayer, and when 'ed got to ' No men-dicants or 
persons s-soliciting ahms to be 'llowed within the barrack- 
I gate' the orderly officer sez, he sez, sudden-like, ' What's 
f s-soliciting: ahms mean ? ' and Private Whipple sez ' Trying 
to pinch nfles, sir,' and the orderly officer smiles sarkastic- 
like and told me to see as Private Whipple understood his 
orders. What dn soliciting ahms mean, sargent ? " 
" If. you giA'cs a copper to a bloke in the street . . . ' 
explained the sergeant. 
" Not me,'- said the corporal apprehensively. " I ain't 
such a mug. One and eightpence a day is all I gets, and 
there ain't much change out of that." 
" If you gives a copper to a bloke in the street," persisted 
the sergeant, " and he asks you for it, he's soliciting alms oft 
you." 
The corporal gazed at the .sergeant witli respectful ad- 
miration. " You must 'a studied hard iij your time, sergeant." 
" A tidy bit," said the. sergeant loftily. " That's the way 
to get on, young feller." 
" ' It is — is — exjjected — that the German Ambassador 
will be 'anded his passports,' " read out the corporal slowly 
" Now what might that mean, sergeant ? " 
" It means," said the sergeant, as he blotted the guard 
report, " as he'll go on furlough. An(} maybe he'll get his 
' ticket.' " 
" D'you think as there'll be war, sargent ? " 
" Guard, turn out ! " It was the voice of the sentry out- 
side. The si.v men sprang from their beds, stretched their 
arms, pulled their tunics straight, and made for the rifle 
rack. Kach man took down a rifle with bayonet fixed, 
:ind filed out of the guard-room. The sergeant took dowai a 
ufie without a bayonet, and fiillowed them. As he reached 
iho doorway he shouted " Sound ten o'clock." The Guard 
Ull in. On the tenth Stroke of the gong the notes of the 
' Last Post " rang out over the barrack square. 
A well-built man with the Royal Arms on his sleeve walked' 
up- smartly. It was the regimental sergeant-major. He had 
a well-arched chest, the clean sloping shoulders of an athlete ; 
liis deltoid muscles rippled tlirough his tunic, and he moved 
on his feet witli a (]uiclv resilient tread. In every movement 
there was a suggestion of suppressed power; he. was like a 
roiled steel spring. As he siw the company orderly sergeant 
lie shouted " Stalf Parade ! 'Shun I" 
" A Company ! " called the sergeant-major. 
" Present, sir." 
" B Company ! " 
" Four absent, sir." 
And he rang the changes on the companies, the band, tlie 
drums, the signallers, till he reached " canteen." 
" Closed and correct, sir." 
Which being done, the sergeant-major turned to the orderly 
officer. The latter stood by him in mess kit, with sword and 
cap, the light of the lamp over the guard room door gleaming 
on his glazed shirt-front. 
"Staff parade present, sir," said the sergeant-major with 
a salute. 
"Staff parade! Dismiss!" said the orderly officer, and 
he turned away. 
At that moment an officer in mess kit, but without a cap, 
walked into the fight. If was the adjutant. He carried a 
telegram in his hand, and his face was grave. 
"Addison! Sergeant-major"! Officer and sergeant- 
major turned and saluted. 
" Yes, sir," said Addison. 
" Look at that, my son," said the adjutant, and he handed 
him the telegram. It contained a single word. 
^_ Addison gave a low whistle. " So it's come at last ? " 
" Yes," said the adjutant slowly, " it's come at last. The 
regiment's got to mobilise. This means war." He turned 
to the warijant-officer. " Sergeant-major, have the officer's 
call sounded. And the orderly-sergeants' call. And I want 
a cycle Orderly to go down to the Colonel, quick ! " 
" Yes, sir, 1 suppose the reservists '11 be coming in in a 
couple of days ? 
" Yes ! " The adjutant was thinking rapidly. " The 
colours must go to the depot. The regimental messplate 
will be taken to the bank — but the mess-president will see 
to that ; the plate of the sergeants' mess had better go with 
it. Sergeant-major ! Have the gymnasium and the Church 
open to put the kits in. Get the church orderly warned at 
once. See that the officers' call and orderly-sergeants' 
are sounded." 
The sergeant-major saluted and disappeared. 
The notes of the two calls floated over the barrack square. 
" The ord-'ly sergeants are want-ed n6w — ord-'ly sergeants 
to run ! " hummed the orderly officer mechanically. He was 
trying to think. 
" Well, Addison," said the adjutant reflectively. Neither 
spoke for a moment. Each man was thinking of a woman 
and wondering how she would take it. 
' \yell," said the subaltern, "no shooting this autumn." 
"No! nor cubbing either. I'm going to sell my 
hunters for what they'll fetch." 
" I wouldn't do that. This show will be over by 
Christma.s." 
" Will it my boy '^ I wonder ! If I know anything of the 
gentle Geiman /i/s lamp is trimmed. Tisn't sense to think 
lie's asking for a licking. Oh no ! " 
" Well, the regiment couldn't be in better form. The 
men arc topping. Don't tell me the Germans could beat our 
men at the butts. Why ! the returns for recruits' firing Part 
III were up to ninety point three last week. I'd put my last 
sliirt on 'em." 
' I know. I know. But what kind of ' predicted area ' 
arc we going to bump into otit there ? Mind you, Addison, 
I'm not grousing. Our Ann'y's not large, but by (iod it's 
good. And soldiering 's a very different thing from what it 
was. We've sweated the last ounce out of ourselves over 
training. These staff-rides !— why, I know every bit of 
cover round here from a dandehon to a copse. We've mugged 
u]5 strategy and tactics as if we'd been back at an Army 
crammer's. And the men I Topping, I agree. Their con- 
duct-sheets show tl)at. As for the sergeant-major he's 
never once let me down all the time I've been adjutant." 
'■ Yes, He's a jolly good sort. He's taught me a Jot. 
■ D'you remember the fight he put up when he was runner 
up for the Army championship. My ! That left of his 
was . , ." 
" Orderly sergeants all present sir." The sergeant major 
had returned. . 
"Thank you, sergeant-major. Right ! I say, sergeant- 
major." 
" Yes, sir." 
" You know wijaL we le in for ? " 
" Y-yes, sir. Germans, isn't it ? " 
" I.s — is the battalion all right, d'you think ? " 
Yes, sir, I think they're all right. Thanks to yon, sir." 
" Well j'ou've had ;i hand in it, sergeant-major. I sup- 
pose we've all done our best. All ritrht, good-night. 
