6 
vour the newfpaper and the breakfaft at 
the fame time; that in an hour when fleep 
has left a blank in our thoughts, and the 
meftory of paft events hath perifhed, a 
new world, or a world of news, fhould 
flart up to fight, and fet every fpring of 
the mind in frefh motion. This I call 
winding up our curiofity for the day; by 
means of which operation, the machine 
goes regularly for the accuftomed time. 
‘The invention of morning papers was of 
infinite importance; for morning was not 
the original time of publication; moft 
of the old papers were publifhed ag noon, 
or in the evening, when they could be of 
ufe enly to thofe perfons who make a 
trade of politics. At that time they were 
not deemed of much ufe in families ; but 
when fe was introduced, morning papers 
naturally followed, and the contents of 
many of thein are now happily contrived 
to give a particular zeft to the Indian 
Fuxury. The conneétion, indeed, be- 
twixt a breakfaft and a newfpaper is in- 
diffoluble. We may hear news at any 
other time of the day; but how lame, | 
how imperfect; how unfatisfa€tory, how 
deficient in all thofe little circumftances of 
detail and defcription, for which we are 
indebted to the abilities of editors and 
collectors of paragraphs. Infenfible and 
ungrateful perfons can only count the va- 
Jue of a bleffing from the lofs of it; but 
if ever the time comes that the propaga- 
tion of news is fufpended, they will learn 
to prize the abilities of thofe geniuies who 
furnifh the news of the day with appro- 
priate imagery; give a brilliancy to an 
accidental fire; break the neck of a brick- 
Jayer with grace; and even cloathe the 
gallows in heroics ;---men, whofe mere 
reports tranfcend even facts in point of 
entertainment, aud whofe hints and fur- 
mules are to the thirfty reader 

*“ Confirmations ftrong, - 
«< As proofs of holy writ.” 
By means of morning papers, the in- 
habitants of the metropolis are put upon 
a footing of equality in point of informa- 
tion, which is not to be looked for in 
provincial towns, far lefs in villages, 
where perhaps the great~Sauire only re- 
ceives a paper, the contents of which he 
dcles out to his efpecial favourites. Yet 
it may be faid, that this equality of in- 
formation which prévails in the metro- 
polis, can tend only to perfect filence, be- 
caufe no man poffeffes an overplus of news 
which he may communicate ; and at firft 
fight this would appear to be the cafe, 
But in fact itis quite otherwife ; for al. 
3 Rhapfady on Newfpapers. 
[ Jan. 
though one may not know more than an- 
other, he certainly may cozceive more than 
another. It is a miftake to fuppofe that 
the intelligence in new{papers is to be un- 
derftood in a literal fenfe, or that we are 
to be contented with what the editor pleafes 
to tell us. For example, we read that 
<¢ Yefterday was married at St. Dunftan’s 
church, Mr. Jofhua Tape, an eminent 
mercer, to Mifs Polly Languith, of Mile- 
end.’ Were we to ftop here, I queftion 
whether all the pepers in London would 
furnifh half an hour’s converfation. But 
-this is no barren text; it includes doe~ 
trines and inferences, which may branch ~ 
out into as many heads as a fermon of the 
laf century. Is it not neceffary to aicer- 
tain what Mr. Tape’s property is; how 
far he may be called an eminent mercer ; 
when it is well known that he failed ten 
years azo, and paid only ten fhillings in 
the pound ; and how far he may be called 
a genteel man, when it is well known he 
ftoops in the fhoulders? It may be alfe 
necefiary to determine whether he deferves 
the charaéter of a polite fhop-keeper, who, 
it is well kuowz, refufed to take back an 
article which a lady had kept only fix 
months : and, above ail, whether the man 
was not an, arrant fool to marry Polly 
Languifh, who, it is well known, had 
not a fixpence? ‘Then, Sir, ‘with refpe& 
to the lady, many important queftions 
arife ; as, irft, how it can be poflible any 
perfon can think her handfome, when it 
is well know {ne has no complexion, very 
bad ftaring eyes, appears to be crooked, 
and moreover, it is /frongly fufpected, is 
thirty-three, or thirty-two at leait. Thus 
you fee that the above paragraph is a full 
and rich fountain, {ending forth waters, ~ 
fweet and bitter, and quenching the talk- 
ative thirft of the whole parith of St. Dun- 
ftan’s, and, probably, the hamlet of Mile- 
end. 
Let us take another example:--- Yef- 
terday Lady was detected in an 
amour with Col. ------- - His Lordfhip 
has fent her to her mother’s, fer the pre- 
fent, and is immediately to fue for a di- 
vorce.”” Now, Sir, will any lover of 
news ftop here? Will thts fatisfy him? 
No. It is neceflary to divide and fub- 
divide this into an infinite feries of leffer 
intelligences, all greatly contributing to 
aright underftanding of the matter. On 
the one hand, his Lordfhip, it is weld 
known, was old enough to be her father, 
and what could he expe€&t? On the other 
hand, Lady ----- » it is well known, was 
young enough to be his daughter, and 
wherein was fhe difappointed ? Then it is 
: highly 

