THE AUSTRALIAN GARDENER. 
ne 
February 1, 1909 
QW igthetimeto BU Y A. 
ON AND NEAR THE 
PAYNEHAM ROAD, 
 -~FHEE RESIDENTIAL SITES, 
with Southerly Aspect, just east of 
Winehester Street, Hast. Adelaide {2nd Section.) 
ire A Double Line of Electric Cars eee 
Will shortly pass Direct to the RAILWAY STATION and HENLEY BEACH. 
HOME ro LUNCH THEN IN FIVE MINUTES 
Electric Light, Gas, Deep Drainage, and all other Up-to-Date Comforts of Civilization. 
Allotments, 60 x 200 (about), High, Dry and Level, can be secured on 
Deposit, 10 per cent. in three months, and the Balance Payable at 
years at 5 per cent. 
payment of 10 per cent 
Any Time during three 
PROGRESSIVE LOANS arranged for those desiring to Build Homes. 
MONEY TO LEND. 
JACKMAN & TRELOAR, 
Bank of Australasia Buildings, 73 King William Street, and opposite Unley T 
WIT AND HUMOR. 
What is done cannot be undone, especi- 
ally if it is a hard-boiled egg, 
, OK 
x 
When a cat gives an entertainmeut from 
the top of a wall, it isn’t the cat we object 
to; it’s the waul. 
* x 
Sart lags 
Teacher: ‘Now, Johnny, what was 
Washington’s farewell address ? 
Johnny: ‘ Heaven.’ 
ok Ok OK OK 
* KO % 
‘T have no heart to sing,’ she screeched. 
Her hearers, one and all, ‘ 
Despairing, sighed, und thep replied, 
‘ But you possess the gall.” 
KOK KOR LK 
a a 
Colonel (to his servant) : ‘ Robert, has 
anybody been smoking my cigars except 
yourself ?” Te j , 
Servant : ‘ Yes, sir—you. 
* * KS 
arr ar 
‘We,’ said an_ urchin, ‘have got a 
chicken at home that Isid a duck’s egg.’ 
-Pooh! Thats nothing ’ said his mate. 
‘Lve got an uncle that laid a foundation- 
stone. 
TELEPHONE 1224 and 2959, 
LICENSED LAND BROKERS, 
: HOUSE AND LAND SPECIALISTS 
f) 
own Hall. 
Miss Passe: ‘I wonder what he meant 
when he said my teeth were like stars ?” 
Her Friend: ‘I think I see his point, 
Don’t your teeth come out at night ?’ 
* 
HF 
‘She did a very foolish thing when she 
married.’ . 
“Why, he was rich, wasn’t he ?’ 
* Yes—he was the foolish thing.’ 
* KK KOK 
* OK K *K 
‘Mammy, dear,’ said little Matty, *‘ what 
is a stepmother ?” 
‘Why, Matty,’ replied his mother, ‘ were 
I to die, and your dad should marry again, 
the lady would be a stepmother,’ 
‘Oh, I see,” remarked Matty. 
step out and she’d step in’ 
* * 
1 
A widow and her little son were walking 
in the park, with one other—who seemed 
likely in the near future to be of the 
family. 
Tne boy sat down on the grass and 
refused to budge, though his mother’s 
escort coaxed hard, and the lady also 
entreated. . 
*He’s afraid ’m going to marry again, 
said the young widow. 
‘I don’t take you, the gentleman 
said. ‘ What’s the connection of ideas ?’ 
‘He refuses to take a step farther. See?’ 
But he had to. 
‘You'd 
_ Says Mr. EE.E in ‘ Scraps, I w K 
ing along a country road ie day uieean 
SN a digging in a garden, I 
pproached him, and t i : 
sation ensued: © following conver- 
‘Ah! So you're a horticulturist eh?’ 
‘A haughty culturist? No, sir; Pm j 
very Hable way.’ Ne a 
“But don’t you horticult? 
‘I dig, though I don’t like it” 
‘I.see. You’re infradig so to speak?’ 
‘I’m in for something,’ : 
‘What do you raise?’ -* 
‘Sardine tins and Cain.’ 
‘The soil isn’t fruitrul,-then?’ 
‘No; it’s I who am the fruit fool’ 
‘Ever try scarlet runners?” 
‘Oh, yes; but they walked.’ 
‘A’m! How do you get on with flowers?’ 
‘Only sow-sow.’ 
Ha! And no reap. How is that?’ 
‘My neighbour’s cat. That? why I’m. 
digging,’ ‘ 
“A flower-bed?’ 
‘No; a purr-slay bed.” 
-‘H’m! Then I gather that you have slain 
the foo?’ 
* *Youdo, and that is about’ the ‘only 
. thing you'll gather in this garden,’: 
‘You appear to have grave business on 
hand,’ 
‘Yes, grave bnsiness,’ 
‘All right. Tl say good-bye.’ 
‘What hoe!’ 
