THE RAMBLER 
The erdinney auctioneer will be 
obliged to go some if he hopes to 
strike the pace set by Mayor, Director 
of Public Safety and Auctioneer Hur- 
ley of Salem. The other evening he 
was engaged in the latter capacity 
before an eager throng, when a wo- 
man’s suit was passed up for offers. 
He was right on deck with the intro- 
ductory “‘come on” stuff and proceed- 
ed to dilate upon the article offered. 
“Ladies and _ gentlemen,” he said, 
“here is an exceptionally fine suit for 
som fortunate buyer. It bears the 
union label and was manufactured in 
this country under the stars and 
stripes of this great union. The wool 
contained in this suit came from sheep 
raised in the town of Union and the 
man in charge was a member of the 
aceite 
NORTH SHORE BREEZE 
sheep-tender’s union. The cloth was 
woven in a union factory and the 
suit manufactured in a union shop lo- 
cated in a building erected by union 
brick-layers, hod carriers and car- 
penters working union hours and re- 
ceiving union wages.” Although it 
was really a two-piece suit, some joker 
in the rear wanted to know if it 
wasn’t a union suit, but he did not 
jar the’ effervescent auctioneer. 
Gradually the mayor coaxed and con- 
vinced the bidders, assuring them that 
“even the buttonholes were bored in 
a union factory with a union drill.” 
Just then a woman from Union street 
bid $3, and the auctioneer, with that 
gracious salaam, for which he is fa- 
mous, declared it “sold to this lucky 
lady here for $3.” 
Oo % 
Eeveryone likes a bunco-steerer, 
but he doesn’t like to be buncoed 
himself. This week there was a fel- 
low in town who, as he said, was col- 
lecting subscriptions to a “no tipping 
club,” the object of the association be- 
ing to prevent the practice of tipping 
waiters, porters, etc. The fee was $1, 
and there evidently was a good show- 
ing of rubes in town, for some of 
them bit. 
To run a newspaper all a fellow has 
to do is to be able to write poems, 
discuss the tariff and money questions, — 
umpire a baseball game, report a wed- 
ding, saw wood, describe a fire so that 
the readers will shed their wraps, | 
make $1 do the work of $10, shine at 
a dance, measure calico, abuse the 
liquor habit, test whiskey, subscribe 
to charity, go without meals, attack 
free silver, wear diamonds, invent ad- 
vertisements, sneer at snobbery, over- 
look scandal, appraise babies, delight 
pumpkin raisers, minister to the af- 
flicted, head the disgruntled, fight to 
a finish, set type, mould opinions, 
sweep the office, speak at the prayer 
meetings and stand in with everybody 
and everything. — Palestine, Mo., 
Pearl. 
Just GRINNED 
The teacher was reading the his- 
tory of England to some of th little © 
pupils. When she came to the state- 
ment that Henry I. never laughed af- 
ter the death of his son, she noticed 
one of the little girls had raised her 
hand and seemed very desirious of at- 
tracting her attention. 
“Well, Amy,” said the 
“What is it?” j 
“Please, ma'am,” said little Amy, 
“what did Henry I. do when he was” 
tickled ?”—Harper’s Bazaar. 
teacher, 
Breeze subscription, $2 a year. 
ALMY, BIGELOW & WASHBURN, Inc. || 
Department Store. 
OUR FIRST GREAT SALE OF | 
CUSTOM TAILORING FOR MEN - | 
An event that will be patronized by many of the smartest dressed men in Salem and suburban towns, because of th 
extraordinary value giving. 
$28 and $30 Suits, Overcoats and Raincoats made to your measure for 
; 
: 
We offer an unqualified guarantee of satisfaction in iy detail to fit, fabric and workmanship or your money back Hf | 
without question. 
Salem, Mass. 
$18.00 
We will take the order of any man in Salem and vicinity from Saturday morning, March Ist to Wednesday night, 
q 
March 12th, for a real up-to-the-minute custom tailored suit—made strictly to your measure in the modern, sanitary shops }} | 
of one of Boston’s best big tailors—guarantee a positive $28 to $30 value and complete satisfaction and deliver promised 
In a choice of fabrics we offer a wide range of woolens from the finest mills in the United States—a range equalled 
in variety and exclusiveness only by the largest and best tailoring establishments. 
Back of it all is the Almy, Bigelow & Washburn guarantee of full $28 to $80 value and full satisfaction. 
HOW WE DO IT—Through tne magnitude of the undertaking—through modern methods that have built up this es- 
tablish ment— -where needless expense is eliminated and quantity buying for spot cash insure lowest prices—where the huge 
volume of small profits makes large profits on individual sales unnecessary—conditions that cannot be met by small shops. 
Depend on the unquestioned reliability of our guarantee* add your name to the list of those who take advantage of 
this semi-annual sale to dress well at small cost. 
eee A meee iow 
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