“ NORTH SHORE BREEZE and Reminder 53 
. Tar Vacation Season Is On! In no year in the 
memory of “the oldest inhabitant” has the fever for a 
change and a vacation been so universal... What a good 
sign it is? The most alert business men are discovering 
that they are able to develop a corps of workers of higher 
efficiency, working them fitty weeks in the year and giv- 
ing them the other two for rest and recreation. It is a 
generous employer that realizes the needs of his employ- 
ees and it is a good employer who realizes that his gen- 
erous impulses and good business policy are one. It is 
a keen man, however, who realizes that he needs a rest 
as well as the men and women in his employ. 
‘THe Suamrock Is On Her Way under her own 
sail across the great sea. Here is hoping that she is 
the fastest craft ever sent ‘“‘over” to contest for the Ameri- 
can Cup. But here is also hoping that when she returns 
she leaves the cup. If there is to be a contest, well may 
the great public on both sides of sea desire a struggle 
of real merit. ‘To win over the fastest sailing craft that 
ever contested for the cup will be no small honor. To 
win in a “sail around the course” will be disgracefully 
tame. . 
Wat CHARMS THE Open AIR summer’s evening 
band concert has? It has become an established summer 
custom that ought to spread everywhere. 
Durinc tHE WEEK a hot wave ‘‘sweltered” in the 
cities, but it did not come near the North or South Shores 
Or ALL THE Sports DrviseD by the ingenuity of 
the human mind to divert, to amuse and to inspire pleas- 
ure none has ever equalled in attractiveness and useful- 
ness the great American game of baseball. It is now 
having its day and well may it! Can anyone conceive 
of a more wholesome diversion in the open air than the 
countless baseball games that draw people from their 
homes, the offices and work shops to an afternoon of 
recreation on Saturday afternoons during the summer? 
LINCOLN Samp: “I do not know much about the tariff, 
but I know that if you buy a ton of steel railsabroad, you 
have the rails and the foreigner has the money; if you 
make a ton of rails here, you have both the rails and the 
money.”—From the speech of Hon. W. W. Grisst, of 
Pennsylvania, in the House of Representatives. 
THe NortH SuHore has had its periodic scare con- 
cerning second story thieves. When the average is struck 
the shore has been particularly free from petty or ex- 
tensive thieving. 
Tuer Breverty Hosprray has made another creditable 
gain during the year.: Its successful work during the 
Salem difficulty was a beautiful illustration of institutional 
heroism. 
Tue “Rep Tare” In Satem has been bound round 
with a woolen string and relegated to the archives of 
of Massachusetts. 
A FEW SMILES 
. SuPERFLUOUS TALK 
Calling any person a liar is super- 
fluous. If he is a liar, he knows it 
without your saying so; and if he 
isn't, he knows you are one. 
A ‘TENNYSONIAN PARAPHRASE 
Sunset and evening clothes, a man to 
call for me— 
©, may there be no breakdown of the 
car when | go out to see! 
Twilight, a howling swell, and after 
that a spark— 
O may my mirror say I’m looking 
well, just after dark! 
_. THe. ANTIQUITY OF MICROBES 
- Appended is the ‘shortest possible 
poem :” 
Adam 
Had ’em. 
Con?TRADICTORY LANGUAGE 
When two railroad locomotives 
come together we say it’s a collision; 
but, when two babies come together 
we say it’s twins. 
FINDING AN OPENING 
Griggs: “I see that Borely has got 
a job at last. He’s working in Hicks’ 
livery stable.” 
sriggs: “What doing?” 
_ Griggs: “Hicks has some horses 
that won’t take the bit; so Borely has 
to talk to them till they yawn.” 
the Salem institutes. 
THE RESEMBLANCE 
Herfine teeth glittered like the stars— 
So brilliant they, so pearly white. 
Still further the resemblance went— 
Like stars they all came out at night. 
Hap REACHED PERFECTION 
“W-w-w-w-would y-y-y-you s-s-s-s- 
suspect I h-h-had ever g-g-graduated 
f-f-f-from a st-st-st-stammering sch- 
school ?” 
“Certainly. You are the most per- 
fect stammerer I have ever heard.” 
GoInc THE WHOLE Hoc 
She: “They say that an apple a day 
will keep the doctor away.” 
He: ‘‘Why stop there? An onion 
a day will keep everybody away.” 
GETTING EVEN 
“OQ Husband, wake up,” cried the 
wife in affright, 
“T’m sure there’s a burglar down 
stairs !”” 
“Go down, then,” said Hubby, “you 
told me last night 
Not to meddle in household af- 
fairs. 
I’ve often seen the model wife, 
The model husband, too; 
But these models to each other wed 
I’ve never seen—have you? 
NEVER 
OPPORTUNITY’S ECCENTRICITIES 
Opportunity knocks but once. Other 
knockers please copy. 
The heart now reigns. 
Nor sy A‘sop 
Mrs. Hen, having performed her 
oviparous function, took a turn round 
the yard. Returning to her nest, she 
found it empty, and clucked angrily 
‘“What’s the trouble, Ma’am?’’ in- 
quired the Rooster. . 
“It’s darned funny,” she replied, 
that I can never find things where | 
lay them.” 
A Woman’s EXPLANATION 
Belle, in Stock Exchange gallery: 
“Mercy! what a hubbub! Why don’t 
they sit down and rest?” 
Maud: “Oh, it’s too expensive. 
Richard told me that a seat down 
there ‘costs thousands of dollars.” 
Reapy For Him 
He, rubbing it in: “You know 
someone has said, ‘If you would 
make a lasting pair of shoes, take 
for the sole a tongue of a woman.’ ” 
She: “Yes, and for the uppers the 
cheeck of the woman who said it.” 
DESERVED REPROOF 
Hicks: “Did I tell you of the dread- 
ful fright I got on my wedding day?” 
Wicks: “Sh! No gentleman should 
speak that way of his wife.” 
USUALLY 
How to mke a proposal 
You can’t learn from books; 
It is made up of stammers, 
Sighs, gurgles, and looks, 
